Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

kishiremypantera:

‘I Don’t Know What I Did But It Worked’ — A thrilling story about my academic life

isafeye:

Everyone who suffers from social anxiety needs a friend who will

1. help them order food when it’s too scary
2. walk with them through crowded places
3. help them laugh it off when they make a mistake
4. not get tired of answering “no, you’re not annoying, silly goose! You’re adorable and I love you” no matter how many times it’s needed

and if you’re that friend, bless u for being fab <3

gayfandomblog:

dangercupcakemurdericing:

Sometimes I’m internally like “How is that a trigger?, ” then I realize other people have different life experiences from me, they don’t owe me their story, and I move the fuck on.

#guys if I’m not tagging something you need me to don’t hesitate to tell me#your mental well being is more important than the 5 seconds it would take me to tag something extra

brainbubblegum:

legallyblained:

efflourescent:

why do you never see baby pigeons

#what if all pigeons are baby pigeons and there is one masterpigeon the size of a whale

This is too funny NOT to draw

beyoncebeytwice:

i love how no matter how badly you fuck up benadryl cumquat’s name everyone on here still knows who ur talking about

automatically:

when you haven’t saved your final project and your computer freezes

“your file has been recovered”

cyanblur:

i remember one time the simpsons made a joke about fox news and they got so insulted they tried to sue them but the court was like “this aired on ur network u can’t sue urself”

attackonsouleater:

lablesareforcans:

whitebeltwriter:

bi-sexual-red-panda:

jamesfrancobs:

stacerface:

pvnkslut:

I have a dog.

I have coffee.

I have tumblr 

HAHAHAHAHAH boys suck i want twelve

amberisntacrayon:

I was at the mall today and overheard this dude talking to two lesbian chicks. I hear him ask, “So which one of you is the guy in your relationship?” And the one girl looks into her pants and says, “It’s not me. How bout you? Are you hiding a dick in there?” Then her girlfriend looks in her pants and says, “Nope, I’m not.” Then the first chick looks at the dude and says, “Hmmm, guess that’s why we are lesbians.” And then I lost my shit.

muslimmafia:

my grandfather always had candy in his pockets, and one time when I got really sick and I was hospitalized my dad told him not to give me any candy. He pulled out his pockets to show he hadn’t even brought any and I got really sad but as soon as my dad walked out of the room he then proceeded to take off his hat and had 2 chewy chocolate candy toffees and 2 orange fanta toffees, and I’ll never forget the happiness and surprise I felt in that one moment in my entire life.

kingshezza:

finding fanfiction i haven’t read yet

tricky-stump:

“you still listen to fall out boy?”

0ptimummm:

Today this girl in class looked different because she had straightened her hair and I told her it was so pretty and straight and she goes “unlike me”. So me thinking that she has bad self esteem, I say “don’t say that. You’re pretty.” To which she replies “oh no, im pretty. I’m just not straight.” And I shit you not my stomach still hurts from laughing too hard.

raptorific:

Shakespeare would seriously laugh so hard if he found out how seriously people take his works. Like, he would probably cry from laughing so hard if you told him that his plays were considered high-brow literature. “It’s all dick jokes and sword fights,” he’d say, “do they seriously tell my dick jokes to schoolchildren? And the kids aren’t allowed to laugh? Do the teachers know they’re telling dick jokes? Oh my god that’s fucking hilarious. Wait until I tell Anne.”

itsbetterthananal:

my dad just yelled up the stairs “CHLOE DID YOU KNOW THE WEATHERMAN WAS GAY I DIDNT KNOW HE WAS GAY HE JUST GOT MARRIED TO HIS BOYFRIEND” and i was like which weatheman are we talking about here and he said “THE BLONDE ONE WITH THE SHARP HAIR CUT AND THE TIGHT PECS AND THE HOT ASS BODY” dad is there something you want to tell me

kalany:

Dear followers,

• have you eaten today?

• did you take any meds you need?

• how about hydration?

• maybe a nap if you need one

• you are awesome

• keep it up

bumblegabe:

Help me prove a point