i just think its so adorable when boys do that thing with their hair where they have it all over their bodies but its actually fur and they have four legs and a wet nose and they’re puppies
constantly thinking “wow, i’ve really internalized some toxic shit”
- accept that no pun is actually Good, but that the true nature of a good pun is to be so terrible that it becomes good.
- say every pun that occurs to you. i’m so serious about this, sometimes the most well received puns will be ones you considered not saying.
- ALWAYS laugh at your own puns, even if nobody else is. (especially if nobody else is.)
- know that you are hilarious. puns are a limitless resource and you have taken it as your duty to bring this gift to humanity. you are a hero.
Sometimes recovery is waking up early to write in coffee shops and practicing yoga and eating lots of fruit and chocolate and sometimes it’s staying in bed all day and hiding from the world until you can stop crying. All of this is okay. What’s important is that you take care of yourself no matter what kind of day you’re having.
I love the term “partners”.
Are we dating?
Are we robbing a bank?
Do we run a legal firm?
Are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit?
Who knows.
82. steve and bucky make everyone marathon the lord of the rings and the hobbit movies. darcy goes around for days calling clint “legolas” and pretending to be gollum.
*flicks holy water on you* leave
Where are you? Apparently not on Tumblr, that’s for sure.
So: anyone who likes…er…books, and asskicking heroines, should read them.
They have many names. Collectively they are the Chronicles of the Kencyrath/Kencyrath Chronicles/God Stalker Chronicles. The first book is Dark of the Gods/God Stalk.
They are at least fourteen kinds of awesome.
Probably more. And the heroine has cat claws.
By the power of awesome! Go! Read!
Some of you are bound to have read them.
Right?
You Aren’t Boring I Just Suck At Conversations I’m Sorry: a novel by me
I’m Not Ignoring You I Just Don’t Know What To Say: a sequel by me
I Feel Like I have Nothing Interesting To Say So I Don’t Say Anything At All And I’m Really Sorry Don’t Stop Talking To Me: the trilogy.
if you’re gonna shit on people for using fictional characters to motivate themselves well first of all what the fuck is your problem
People who say bi erasure doesn’t happen need to realize Freddie Mercury is known as the most famous homosexual man when he identified himself as bisexual. If that’s not bi erasure I don’t even know.
Also PoC erasure, most people don’t know he was 100% Indian
Specifically he was Parsi.
Also raisedZeroastrian.*zoroastrian
#i dont think the white boys can handle a queer brown guy being their god
also why is everyone so surprised when the things i bake are good why are you acting like this is shocking
Al Capone (via hefuckin)
This has been my favorite quote since 9th grade
(via sassafranski)
so airplanes officially banned tweezers. honestly i think anyone that can hijack an airplane with a pair of tweezers deserves the airplane
So Poptarts has this new commercial where the poptart is outside a band tour bus
and I just
their faces, their hair, the fedora
POPTARTS ARE FOB FANS
I see no difference
JFC
im in one of those periods in my life where i cant focus on anything i cant finish an assignment i cant listen to one song for more than 5 seconds i cant sit through a tv show episode i cant finish a book i cant write a story
all i can do is stare blankly at the wall and wish i had something to do but everything i could do or want to do is just supremely unsatisfying
SOMEONE PUT IT IN WORDS THANKS YOU
Hey kids this is a symptom of depression
“When I was about 20 years old, I met an old pastor’s wife who told me that when she was young and had her first child, she didn’t believe in striking children, although spanking kids with a switch pulled from a tree was standard punishment at the time. But one day, when her son was four or five, he did something that she felt warranted a spanking–the first in his life. She told him that he would have to go outside himself and find a switch for her to hit him with.
The boy was gone a long time. And when he came back in, he was crying. He said to her, “Mama, I couldn’t find a switch, but here’s a rock that you can throw at me.”
All of a sudden the mother understood how the situation felt from the child’s point of view: that if my mother wants to hurt me, then it makes no difference what she does it with; she might as well do it with a stone.
And the mother took the boy into her lap and they both cried. Then she laid the rock on a shelf in the kitchen to remind herself forever: never violence. And that is something I think everyone should keep in mind. Because if violence begins in the nursery one can raise children into violence.”
”—Astrid Lindgren, author of Pippi Longstocking, 1978 Peace Prize Acceptance Speech (via jillymomcraftypants)
reblogging again!
(via babypeapod)
fun fact: if you tell someone to kill themselves it’s considered encouraging suicide and you can get a fine of $25,000 and 10+ years in prison. if they actually commit you can be charged with manslaughter.
so really it’s in your best interest not to be a cunt.
This needs to be shared
But this shouldn’t be the only reason.
When I worked at a non-profit that handled suicide prevention, I had access to the donation records. Each month, a specific man donated 15$ to our organization. It was like clockwork.. same day, same man, he had been doing this for over 4 years. It always seemed odd to me but I never questioned it… until I saw a note attached one month. “For Noah- Dad”
his donation was once his child’s allowance.
I can promise you, they would miss you for the rest of their lives.
any cookie is bite sized if you try hard enough
ANY COOKIE IS BITE SIZED IF YOU TRY HARD ENOUGH
NOT ALL COOKIES
what happened to my post
i am the latter
i regret this post because every fuckijg straight person who reblogs it feels the need to add a comment like this to avoid anyone thinking even for a second that theyre gay
I Have No Plot But I Know Which Groceries These Characters Would Buy: A Tale of Misplaced Priorities