Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win
Month
girl scouts are letting in trans girls and letting girls replace God with whatever they want in the pledge, also they use cookie income to support abortion and LGBT agendas
boy scouts are just now allowing gay scouts in, officially in january, but gay leaders are still banned and they’re talking about segregation on camping trips, with gay scouts and straight scouts in different tents. also they still ban atheists,
girl scouts: 10000 boy scouts: 0
Standing ovation to the Darcy Lewis fandom.
Never ever stop.
I love you.
When an actor stumbles into their fandom on Tumblr:
The longer that gif went on, the more I laughed/cried.
if you want to kill someone stab them with an icicle because the icicle will melt and then there will be no murder weapon
Better yet, make like one of my favorite short stories and murder them with big frozen leg of lamb and then cook the lamb.
Then when the police arrive offer them something to eat and then have the police eat your murder weapon.
I love that story
guys with sleeve tattoos wearing dress shirts with the sleeves rolled up. fuck man.
Yes. Fuck man. Fuck that man real hard.
“i am not at all physically attracted to you”
is an absolutely valid reason to not want to date someone.
People had the nerve to call me shallow for this.
By the way, it’s also totally cool to turn someone down without explaining your reasons. You are not interested, no will suffice. Do not feel pressured to explain your decisions to someone else.
IF YOU WANNA BE MY LOVER
YOU GOTTA tell me really explicitly because I can’t tell when people are actually flirting with me
i started a new sleeping medication and one of the side effects is really freakin weird dreams and last night i had a dream that by day i volunteered at a library and by night i was a crime fighting lesbian who defeated misogynists and robbers and stuff with super literary knowledge
i was appropriately titled “the lesbrarian”
no i dont want to be remembered for this
this mother fucker is the voice of nemo
shit i think i want to fuck nemo
this little fucker goes to my college— I’ve met him. To make matter worse, he’s sweet and shy. And hates it when people whisper “fish are friends, not food” around him.
oh my god
SWEET MOTHER OF GOD
This man
never
lets anyone
drive him.
He literally
is always
the one in the drivers seat.
He has a chauffeur
that he drives.
And then I realized…
There’s probably
good reason
for that.
That went from shocking to funny to depressing in the span of 5 seconds
i want there to be an angel that descends from the heavens only when someone is being stupid
and the angel just gently places their hand over the person’s mouth
and whispers in a voice filled with heavenly beauty and love
“no”
ANABIEL
LOOK IT UP
NEW FAVORITE ANGEL
This explains everything
rect:
being an adult means you can curse in front of your parents without worrying that they’re gonna ground u or something like that
nah this is white privilege
i curse around my parents and i wont be able to walk again
black parents live by one rule:
A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without harassing them
No, that is still unsolicited, and thus, harassment. No amount of “darlins” is gonna make me not want to punch your ass for coming on to me without provocation.
GOD
SHUT UP
UR SO STUPID
[x]
the comic is killing me
“That’s your otp”?
“They’re just friends”
“That’s your otp”?
“But they hate each other.”
“That’s your otp?”
“But they’re not gay.”
“That’s your otp?”
“But they are like 2 feet apart in height.”
“That’s your otp?”
“But one of them is dead.”
Reblogging again because this got even better!
some kid in my class wrote an essay about how it never explicitly says Beowulf isn’t a robot
Bae: Come over
Me; I can’t.
Bae: I got the Winter Solider on DVD
Me:
really all you need to know about the american health care system is that there’s a popular tv series where a man turns to cooking industrial quantities of crystal meth in order to pay his hospital bills
my favorite college experience is when i had a 7am class and the kid next to me literally poured a monster energy drink into his coffee said “i’m going to die” and drank the whole thing
english is not my first language and all my life i thought brussel sprouts was the name of some celebrity
everyone is always like “i hate brussel sprouts” and all this time i was here thinking what the fuck did that poor guy do
a happy couple might’ve got married today
someone might’ve kissed their best friend and realized they are gay today
someone might’ve found out they were officially cancer free today
someone might’ve finally finished their debut novel today
lots of interesting things might’ve happening today
we should celebrate
you’re the kind of person everyone needs in their lives
Writing an essay
Finishing the essay
Turning the essay in
omg this is perfect
one follower away from independence
Everyone points out that Robert Downey Jr basically IS Tony Stark, but the same can be said for Mark Ruffalo who basically IS Bruce Banner.
I mean-
Seriously-
Basically-
It’s pretty obvious-
That he-
IS Bruce Banner.
“its not fair girls can wear pants and guys cant wear dresses” stfu yes you can. go to jc pennys. buy a cute dress. wear the dress. if anyone says you cant wear the dress. slay them.congratulations you are wearing a dress
