- “Yeah, your mirror is a doorway
into my dimension and I’ve seen everything. Even that dance part for
one” au
- “Sure, I’m an alien but I don’t
know why you’d think I’d abduct people. But there’s a great eatery
across the galaxy if you want to check it out” au
- “Listen, I am genetically
modified and on the run and you will let me hide in your
house” au
- “I was just taking a walk
through the woods and I didn’t think Fae really existed, and I
really don’t think I’ll accept any food from you” au
- “My dragon is acting sick and
you specialize in dragon illnesses, please take a look at it. Wait,
why are you laughing” au
- “Buddy, we are in the middle of
a zombie apocalypse, I specialize in botany in unfavorable terrain
and I just saw you make a sword out of PVC pipe and string; we’re
definitely teaming up” au
- “As a wielder of dark magic I
definitely plan on taking over the world once I trick you into
releasing me from my prison, but crap, I think I might like you more
than I meant to” au
- “Ok, so you panicked and kissed
the human so he wouldn’t drown, but we can’t keep him and he can’t
leave if he knows about us merpeople, so what are we going to do”
au
- “Look, I honestly didn’t mean to
run into any awkward werewolves on my hike and why would I tell
anyone about it, what do you mean ‘take me to your leader’ are you
serious. How cliché can you be” au
- “I’m a superhero and you’re the
villain, but I saw you visiting kids at the children’s hospital and
letting them act like they defeated you and now it’s really hard to
punch you in the face” au
I’m about 85% sure that you can describe at least one of my stupid baby almost-novels from years back as “I am genetically modified and on the run and you WILL let me hide in your house.” No, wait, I lied, you could probably stretch that to one of my completed novels, too, if you assume that the hiding is temporary and ends with kidnapping.
So I’ve been thinking about why I like Magnus Bane so much and I came to realize that it’s because Magnus Bane has achieved everything I want to achieve as a bisexual person:
Comfortable & open about his bisexuality
Notorious
Flirts adorably (if crudely)
Makes cute people fluster
Masks good heart with wit & sarcasm
Falls in love despite heartbreak he’s experienced before
Okay let’s discuss this: Because I feel like the “Angelina Jolie paradox” from Scott Westerfeld’s book “Afterworlds” is law. If you don’t know much about it here is a word for word passage from the book:
“You know when you’re watching a movie starring Angelina Jolie? And the character she’s playing looks just like Angelina Jolie, right? … she’s a regular person in that world not a movie star. But the other characters never mention that she looks exactly like Angelina Jolie.”
“Because that would mess up the movie,” Carla said.
“Exactly. So when you cast Angelina Jolie in a film, you’re creating an alternate universe in which the actress Angelina Jolie does not exist.“
And it makes sense. Think about other movies: I think if someone was looking like George Clooney, people in that movie would notice, right? So if you cast an actor in your film, that actor doesn’t exist in that movie or TV universe anymore - in a weird, weird way.
But like, Deadpool completely DESTROYS THIS. Wade literally says the name “Ryan Reynolds” and references movies he’s been in and has a magazine cover with HIM ON IT? Like, it’s absolutely taking this paradox and throwing it out the window and it’s half beautiful half confusing, because has Wade spent his whole life being told “hey so you look like that Ryan Reynolds guy.”
Anyway. That’s just my little commentary on this fantastic movie. Proceed.
Yes. You read that right. Someone did the math and because of a tight race and historically low turnout, 1500 people who will caucus on Saturday who ordinarily wouldn’t participate in primaries what it takes for Sanders to win Nevada
The app, called Bernie Takes It, allows you to pledge (to vote, or convince x people to vote). It counts all the pledges and only asks you to follow through once the threshold is met (in this case 1500 votes).
Our math is linked to at the bottom of the app.
Please take two minutes to pledge, then start Facebanking (in this case we’re actually asking people to start now even though the threshold hasn’t been reached yet, just because we finally finished the software only today;)
I believe Facebanking* is very high bang for your volunteering buck today. Using myself as an example, I have 450 “Friends of Friends who Like Bernie and live in Nevada” (FOFWLBALIN!). I can PM these people individually, telling them that I’m part of a commitment to get the 1,500 votes Bernie needs to win and requesting their promise to vote tomorrow.
You will not have another opportunity this year for your volunteer efforts to go as far as they will in Nevada today!!
For two reasons.
With low voter turnout, a little effort goes way farther. Bernie only needs about 1,500 extra votes to virtually guarantee victory in Nevada (whereas if Texas were on Saturday, he’d need about 50,000 extra votes to probably win).
A win now changes hundreds of thousands of minds going into Super Tuesday. Do you know how much phonebanking it would take to change hundreds of thousands of minds? More than we have!
Up until the Iowa caucus tie on February 1, the media, pundits and Democratic Party establishment had dismissed the Sanders campaign. Even though (or, because) he’s a champion for policies that the vast majority of Americans support, he’s been called radical, fringe and unelectable.
Despite these odds, he has more volunteers than any campaign and is breaking all kinds of fundraising records – building on regular-folks-size donations of less than $30. With his Iowa tie and New Hampshire dominance among nearly every demographic, Bernie has come from way behind to be a true contender. The race is on, and every delegate in every state is now crucial to momentum and the nomination.
YOU CAN START FACEBANKING RIGHT NOW!
But how can you help him win a state if you don’t live there? Our brand new Facebanking tool enables you to find your friends’ friends who live in Nevada and Like Bernie. Your job is simply to message them and share the importance of putting your vote where your Like is.
Sample message: “Hey Bernie-lovin’ friend of friend, did you know that Mr. Sanders only needs 1,500 extra votes to take Nevada tomorrow? We’re collecting pledges from people who are inspired to caucus when they see that their vote ACTUALLY MAKES A DIFFERENCE. Can you caucus tomorrow at 11am and let me know that you’re going to do it so I can change our tally to 1,499?”
So I went to see deadpool and sitting next to me there were two guys complaining about how many girls there were, all fake geek girls watching the movie just because Ryan Reynolds is hot.
I mean, yeah, he’s hot.
Anyway, at the end of the movie these two guys stand and leave because “there are just the credits, anyway”.
I mean, even my mother knows that you need to wait until the end of every marvel movie.
But sure, fake geek girls.
what the fuck is with men and how they write women taking showers honestly. like all of that back-arching mouth-half-open luxoriously-running-fingers-through-hair shit. straight dudes thinkin girls are like damn-near climax from just being naked, whats w/ that
from now on the only female shower scenes ill accept involve either; a).
sitting in a ball on the shower floor or b). standing completely still while staring into the abyss absentmindedly and scratching your ass. anything else gets a 0 and a “see me after class”
You know, an R-rated Deadpool film is well and good, but I kind of want to see Wade show up in one of the regular X-Men films, too.
I want to see him hastily catch himself every time he’s about to say “fuck”, because he knows that the film - being rated PG-13 - is only allowed one F-bomb, and he wants to make it count.
I want to see him throw the ugliest tantrum when, after he spends the whole movie saving up that one allotted “fuck” for the perfect moment, somebody else uses it up before he has a chance.
And that someone is Wolverine.
I so love that this is completely possible in upcoming films
Wade: Everyone knowns PG-13 mean you only get one f-bomb. Gotta use it wisely.
so in my greek class we were talking about oral composition and how something like the iliad must have been composed, and my prof asked us to consider how we would rapidly compose something like poetry on the spot. and i think it was a really important exercise not just for understanding the construction of an oral epic but also for reminding us of how great works can come from supposedly “humble” origins. so if anyone is ever snobby about their homer, just remind them that, as my professor put it, the iliad is basically ancient freestyle rap, and homer is much closer to jay z than to f. scott fitzgerald
basically what i’m saying is please imagine homer asking someone to give him a beat on the lyre and then dropping the sickest fucking meter ever. the ill-iad, by lil homie
I'm actually interested in what you talked about yesterday, namely Finn and his relationship to pain meds + stormpilot.
The first thing Finn asks when he wakes up is, “Where’s Rey?”
The second thing he asks is, “Shouldn’t you be doing something important?”
The third thing he asks is, “Why aren’t they letting me get out of bed?”
Poe holds onto his hand and answers. “She’s coming back in a few days. I’m doing something important right now. They’re not letting you get up because you’re still healing.”
Finn clearly wants to argue with all three of those; for someone who grew up obeying orders, Poe thinks, the guy’s got a contrary streak a parsec wide. But after a minute he settles back into the bed. “I must be all better, though,” he says. “Nothing hurts.”
Poe’s eyebrows are climbing halfway up his forehead before he remembers about the Stormtrooper Acclimatization Protocols. He’s not supposed to say, nothing’s supposed to hurt, what the hell, Finn. “Do things usually hurt when you’re injured?”
“Pain is good for focus,” Finn says slowly, watching Poe carefully. “Did – you not know that?”
“I did,” says Poe, instead of saying something like what the fuck. “But it also makes life a lot less pleasant.”
Finn seems to consider this seriously. “So – what, you guys use pain meds even when you don’t need to? What if you run out? What happens if someone else is in pain and I used it all up, or–”
Poe has a flash to the bombing of their first Resistance base, a few years ago; General Organa had dragged a half-dozen people out of the wreckage before getting caught in a blast herself. Han had shown up less than three days later, frantic and awful and every bit the asshole Leia had described, and he’d sat at her bedside for two weeks until she woke up. She summoned Poe and Statura for a sitrep and had asked a million and one questions, with her leg still wrapped up and her arm in a sling, and Han slouched in a chair beside her, smiling faintly.
“I’ll have the doctor let you know just how much pain medication we’ve got,” he says to Finn. “Suffice to say, we’ve got plenty. And our supply lines are secure. And Finn,” he adds, leaning forward, Finn’s hand clutching at his, “You’re worth the expenditure, okay? The Resistance wants you healthy, but we’re not just an army, okay? We want you feeling feeling good, too.”
wheres all the support for the emotional abuse victims
no, seriously. victims of emotional abuse have it hard because they do not have the physical marks or the records to “prove” to someone they were hurt and are hurting. most people will not take emotional abuse as seriously as physical abuse, saying “you should get over it” or “sticks and stones”. thats fucking bullshit.
emotional abuse victims who have been forced to do or say or be things you never wanted to, i love you.
emotional abuse victims who have been gaslighted and manipulated to the point where you no longer know what is real, i care for you.
emotional abuse victims who are told they will never be loved by anyone else and they are not a good person, you are amazing.
emotional abuse victims who feel manipulative and often catch themselves mirroring actions of their abusers and feel sick to their stomachs because theyre “turning into them”, you are not them and never will be. you are so much better than that.
emotional abuse victims who have to live every day suffering because nobody understands how messed up you are from what they said or did or made you do, you arent alone.
anyone who reads this, i care for you. please support all victims of abuse every single day because they deserve it just like they deserve the love and care those in the past have failed to provide them
i really love our generation’s joke trend of like, very calm but incredibly inflated hyperbole. like nobody says “oh she’s pretty” anymore we say “i would willingly let her murder me” and everyone is just like “lol same”
i think “same” is also great and “me,” i love when somebody reblogs a picture of like, a lizard, and just says “me” and we all know exactly what they mean. the current online Humor Discourse is remarkable because we trade exclusively in metaphors and implications and nobody ever, ever says anything outright and yet EVERYBODY understands each other perfectly
ExR "We are gods. Grantaire was only mortal man but he gave his life for us. For us dream. We are gods but I don't know what to do for him"
Hey anon, I really, really hope you don’t mind me playing a bit with your sentence, I’m sorry! I ask for one and then I transform it, I hope you like this anyway!
“We are gods!” Enjolras finally says, almost shouts, to his stone-faced friends. “Grantaire was only a mortal man, but he gave his life for us! For our dream! We are gods but I don’t know - I don’t know what to do for him now,” he finishes more quietly.
The silence is his only answer. He tries to muster some more anger in himself, but there’s no point in being angry at his friends, because he knows they’re mourning Grantaire as much as he is - maybe even more, he thinks guiltily as he catches sight of Joly’s pale face and the way Bossuet is firmly looking at the ground, holding Joly’s hand tightly.
For the first time in his life, a strange nagging feeling of emptiness is creeping into Enjolras’ chest, and he’s at lost at what to do about it. He’s on the verge of sitting next to Combeferre, seeking contact, when he hears a delicate cough.
He sees his friends tense and frown, and he looks behind him. His mother is standing there, tall and as gorgeous as always; she’s chosen to take the form that Enjolras remembers the most: golden skin and golden curls, full pinks lips and a heart-shaped face with sharp-cheekbones and big blue eyes. She’s chosen to look like him. She hasn’t done that in more than five years.
“Nobody appreciates hubris, my darling,” is her first words now. “None of you are gods, you are merely their sons.”
“Is this a lesson?” Enjolras asks, anger coming back in a moment. “Was this supposed to be a slap on the wrist, is that why you came to him with this ridiculous bargain?”
Aphrodite tilts her head on the side, thoughtful.
“He came to me,” she says after a second. “He was scared of Zeus’ wrath, of what would happen to you now that your plans had been revealed. He knew I could appease Zeus with the right incentive.”
“You could have asked for anything in return,” Enjolras says furiously. “Anything but his death!”
“I did,” Aphrodite says. “I asked him to give up his love for you.”
ok i wasnt going to comment but i know how fast misinformation spreads on this site and how many of yall just hate checking sources before taking things as facts. and im going to try to do this without spoiling anything.
there are not rape jokes in the Deadpool movie.
one of the scenes ppl keep talking about is when Negasonic Teenage Warhead hits Angel Dust and Deadpool says ‘i feel bad for anyone who tries to pressure her into prom sex’. hes not joking about date rape. he is literally saying she is going to beat the shit out of anyone who tries to pressure her into doing something she doesnt want to do.
at another point Wade and another character are talking about their own abusive childhood lives. they are talking about their OWN abuse. this also happens in the comics in which Wade was both physically and sexually abused as a child and he tries to joke it off. hes trying to make light of his own abuse.
i know a lot of people have said they arent going to watch the movie bc of that post claiming there are tons of rape jokes and yall just need to talk with people who have actually seen the movie before you make snap judgements.
i’m happy to talk with anyone who is still nervous or needs something clarified.
don’t just reblog Bernie posts and think you’re making a change…18+ tumblr users, GO REGISTER AND VOTE! No matter how many millions of people support him, we can’t do shit unless you get off your butt and VOTE! you have the power to make a change by simply showing up at a voting booth for 5 minutes, so don’t you dare give any excuses.
STRESS THE REGISTER PART! That’s the most common mistake! Do Not forget to register to vote, make sure you don’t miss the deadline in your state!
i did that adult thing you can do where you buy an entire cake and just eat it
i am eating an entire cake
update: there is more cake than i imagined.
i see now why my parents didn’t let me do this
The trick to buying an entire cake and eating it is you don’t eat it all at once.
But, and this is crucial, not because someone else is controlling your portions. Because it’s your cake. Because you don’t have to worry that if you don’t finish it now, somebody will take the rest away. Because you can eat as much cake as you feel like eating and then stop, and the remaining cake will still be there when you want some more. Which may be in an hour or may be in a couple of days.
The only way to start speaking a language is to start speaking it badly
I will reblog this everytime becAUSE IT IS SO TRUE AND WILL ALWAYS BE TRUE . DONT BE AFRAID TO GO OUT THERE AND MAKE MISTAKES BBYS. AN INCORRECT VERB TENSE ISNT THE END OF THE WORLD
Yup. This is why you should look askance at anything that claims it will “boost your immune system”. ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME, NICE HEALTH FOOD STORE LADY?!
Ever since gay marriage became legal in Spain in 2005, thousands of
lesbian couples have tied the knot. But this law has an interesting
precedent; Marcela and Elisa were married in 1901. In a church wedding!
Wedding photo of Marcela (left) and Elisa, dressed as a man.
Of course, same-sex marriage was not legal in Spain at the time, so the
two school teachers had to come up with a delicate scheme. One day,
Elisa and Marcela simulated a fight in the house they shared in the tiny
village of Dumbría, and Elisa moved to A Coruña.
While there, Elisa cut her hair, started wearing men’s clothes, and took
up smoking. She found a priest desperate to gain parishioners, and he
baptized her as a man. She adopted the name ‘Mario’ and returned to
Dumbría. Marcela then introduced Elisa to her family and neighbors as
‘Mario’, Elisa’s cousin, and said they were going to get married.
Indeed, people were amazed at how much this ‘Mario’ looked like Elisa;
same height, same voice, same mannerisms and temper.
The wedding was held on the 8th of June, 1901, in the Church of St. Jorge in A Coruña.
After the ceremony, the happy couple was photographed at José Sellier’s
studio. The next day, the newlyweds returned to Dumbría in a horse
carriage.
Eventually, Marcela and ‘Mario’ were outed by their
suspecting neighbors to local authorities. A huge scandal broke out, with both national and international newspapers writing about the ‘disgraceful’ marriage which did not include a man. Both women were fired from their jobs,
excommunicated, and an arrest warrant was issued for both of them. The couple fled to many Spanish cities, until finally boarding a ship to the
Americas, presumably to Argentina.
It should be noted that
Marcela and Elisa’s wedding is still valid to this day, since it was
never annulled by neither The Catholic Church nor the Civil Registry. Therefore,
Marcela and Elisa’s union is the first officially registered same-sex marriage in Spain, 104 years before it became legal for Spanish lesbian couples to marry.
