omg when ladies talk about their wives and just say “my wife” I just get so excited and happy because it is all possible and real. it’s so amazing and beautiful
DUDE my teacher canceled class the other day and so the next day we were all like oh no is everything ok?? and shes like “oh yeah its fine its just my wife wasn’t feeling good so i took her home, made her some soup, yknow fun stuff” and i swear everyone in class froze for a sec cuz we never knew she was a lesbian but then we spent a good 30 min of class time discussing whether her wife actually ate the soup cuz we all know she sucks at cooking
that is the best thing I’ve heard all day omg
this is beautiful
I had a professor who would talk in class about her wife and their four daughters and it always made me go !!! inside. like, wooooow, family goals.
In my undergrad, I took a module that had two lecturers teaching it. The first was very butch and would occasionally talk about how brilliant her wife was in the field and would talk about her kids and general family life. Then the other lecturer took over classes, and she would talk about her wife too, and how brilliant her wife was academically. Then they taught a class together and the penny dropped. They were talking about each other and both thought the other was the literal shit in their area of media.
It’s been delightful for me to watch my friends finally able to get legally married. Every time @crofethr says “my wife” it’s like a chorus of bluejays dance around behind her.
I was at work at a deli a few weeks ago and this group of three women came in pretty late at night. One was the mother of one of them, and the other two were just being really cute and holding hands and cuddling and whatnot. One was leaning on the other and she seemed really tired, so her wife ordered for her and the mom was like, “Married for seven years, they know each others’ orders by heart” and I honestly felt like I’d been blessed
oh my god that’s beautiful
one time a lecturer was discussing all the stupid reasons she’s been called up in front of the board (which include an actual formal accusation of witchcraft) and once a student accused her of homophobia and homophobic statements and she walked into the formal board hearing with her only prepared defense being “remember how I’m married to another woman ok thanks let’s go get lunch”
dchxhgsfahKasggzjz oh my god
I’m an optician and one day I had 2 women, one blonde and one brunette, come in to pick up glasses. I had the blonde try on hers while the brunette was talking to one of my coworkers. When she put them on I said, “Oh looks like they’re not sitting straight.” Without missing a beat she said “Oh honey, nothing about me is straight,” and proceeded to pat her wife on the butt and say “Honey, did you hear what I said? It was really funny. Honey? Honey, I said nothing about me is straight.”
Those people who constantly reblog your stuff but you never really talk:
I do notice my regulars. You guys are the best.
“Regulars” makes me feel like a bar-tender…
Wiping down my dash at the end of an evening, I see your read-more, over-hear your rant in the tags, so I pour you a drink.
“…what’s troubling you, kid?”
It’s nine o’clock on a Saturday As the regular crowd tumbls by There’s an old fandom queen blogging next to me And her little gray tags catch my eye
She says tumblr I’m feeling like shit today can you send me some posts for a smile can we talk about slash, can you fill up my dash so I won’t have to think for a while
Laa dahdah didee dah La dahdah didee dah dadum
Fill up my dash, you’re my followers Fill it with pictures and fic Yeah we’re all in the mood for some memery And occasional pictures of dick
Now Jill is a centaur novelist And she writes of her girlfriend and wife She reblogs from Toni, who’s in My Little Pony, And probably will be for life.
As the staff implements wretched changes And we think of how aliens bone We are writing a lot about loneliess: It’s much better than writing alone.
No shit reaaallyyyy wow I would NEVER have guessed *cough cough* *intense sarcasm*
And so all Spencer’s talk of ‘no this is really Steve Rogers, it’s not brainwashing or a trick, is BULLSHIT. They purposefully enraged fans to sell their cheap trashy book. Now I have to wait even longer before I can buy a Cap comic, or hell, start making my own.
As you walk along the Thames pondering what Brexit will mean for you and your family, a soaking wet woman walks up a set of stairs from the river, hands you a package and tells you “Sort it out, please!” before vanishing around a corner. You open the package to find Excalibur.
Look at me. Look me in the eye. On November the 8th, 2016, one of two things will happen: Hillary Clinton will become president, or Donald Trump will become president. These are the only two possibilities. The superdelegates aren’t going to switch. An indictment isn’t coming. There is no third possibility. There is no space between the spaces where you can hide. Every vote for Donald Trump requires two Hilary Clinton votes to overcome. A Hillary Clinton vote can only be overcome by two Donald Trump votes. If you stay home, a Donald Trump vote doubles its power. This is the real, actual reality of the situation. There is not one other option.
And there’s no ctrl-alt-del for the election. Read up on 2000 if you doubt this.
And to those of us who supported Bernie, he WANTS you to vote for Hillary. If you believe in him and his mission you will follow his advice. He knows that writing his name in, or voting for anyone else besides Clinton, is effectively voting for Trump.
Clinton will be an effective leader. She had experience and will be able to pass at least slightly liberal legislation with pragmatism. Is she the ideal? No, I am still convinced she has no truly held beliefs. But she is sure better than the alternative.
The only way I’ll accept the hydracap story line to play out is:
Steve’s busy being a nazi when Bucky goes to check on him and bucky’s like “wtf the fuck”
So he’s like “steve no” and steve’s like “steve yes” and Bucky’s like “that’s only funny when you’re a good guy doing reckless things and not a NAZI doing NAZI THINGS” and steve’s like “(ง'̀-‘́)ง” because he’s a dick now
but Bucky can win this
because Bucky’s got a secret weapon
an assassin you know and love who’s unafraid to step in
he’s constantly confusing, confounding the marvel henchmen
EVERYONE GIVE IT UP FOR AMERICA’S FAVOURITE FIGHTING TRASH CAN
Deadpool
so he goes to deadpool like “you know that thing you do where you break the fourth wall or w/e” and deadpool’s like “yeah?”
“can i use it for a bit?”
so they go off and fight the marvel writers (with swords) and then destroy the new issues (with fire) and then they go to see steve and steve hugs them all and he’s crying and thanking them for saving his characterisation
and then they go out for ice cream or something
Okay this is all A+ but I’m reblogging for AMERICAS FAVORITE FIGHTING TRASH CAN
This is it. This is literally the ONLY way I would ever accept this.
For @littlestartopaz from my vast repository of prompts from her. R from this post, Steve/Bucky/Sam
friendship (“This is without a doubt the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in.”)
Okay, some stealth feelings about Steve
being all alone in the 21st century snuck in there, but they’re real
small and mostly this is very funny, I have no regrets. Timelines for the first two should be
obvious, the third one is some time after they drag Bucky’s poor exhausted self
out of cryo again and go fight more shit.
Because Steve is a fighty shit and Bucky would never be able to let him
run off alone and Sam is rapidly falling into the same black hole of stress.
“This is without a
doubt the stupidest plan you’ve ever had–”
“Well, now, Buck, we
both know that’s just not true,” Steve protested, half-laughing.
“The stupidest plan you’ve ever had,” Bucky repeated firmly, and
knocked back the rest of his beer without breaking his scowl. “Except for that time you became a lab rat,”
he allowed as he lowered his glass, “this is the stupidest.”
A short list of things I don’t have time to do on top of my two Les Mis fics and my Actual Real Novel:
write that one Laurens/Hamilton AU where Hamilton is a supersoldier created to be the first of an army to help America win the Revolutionary War, and Laurens dies tragically in South Carolina, and Alexander sinks into a melancholia until Eliza sends him to France to see Lafayette, during which voyage he’s lost at sea inside the Arctic Circle until he gets fished out of the ice just in time for the Civil War to break out and the Confederacy to deploy the Southern Soldier against the Union
A short list of things I am doing because @twistedangelsays is a right bastard and a horrible enabler:
“writers always know exactly where they are going with their work!”
r u sure
“no writer does anything by mistake, it’s all very strategic”
r u sure
“they use symbolism in everything. for example, a simple sentence symbolises directness and-”
R U SURE
Okay listen, just LISTEN, there are totally times when everything has Meaning, like Methods of Inheritance, which is rattling around my Tumblr somewhere. Literally everything has Meaning and Symbolism because one does not simply write faeries without that.
But like 99.997% of the time I am making everything up every step of the way.
So Donald Trump is staying down the street from where I live. And today was an unusually warm day and some lady, lord help me, some lady in the store I work at told me it was unusually warm today because the devil was here.
like honestly with this pacific rim 2 news all i can think about is who fucked stacker pentecost. who climbed mount everest. who dreamed the impossible dream
For @littlestartopaz from my vast repository of prompts from her. R from this post, Steve/Bucky/Sam
friendship (“This is without a doubt the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in.”)
Okay, some stealth feelings about Steve
being all alone in the 21st century snuck in there, but they’re real
small and mostly this is very funny, I have no regrets. Timelines for the first two should be
obvious, the third one is some time after they drag Bucky’s poor exhausted self
out of cryo again and go fight more shit.
Because Steve is a fighty shit and Bucky would never be able to let him
run off alone and Sam is rapidly falling into the same black hole of stress.
“This is without a
doubt the stupidest plan you’ve ever had–”
“Well, now, Buck, we
both know that’s just not true,” Steve protested, half-laughing.
“The stupidest plan you’ve ever had,” Bucky repeated firmly, and
knocked back the rest of his beer without breaking his scowl. “Except for that time you became a lab rat,”
he allowed as he lowered his glass, “this is the stupidest.”
it’s kinda cool how our generation has created actual tone in the way we write online. like whether we: write properly with perfect grammar, shrthnd everythin, use capitals to emphasise The Point, use extra letters or characters for emotion!!!!!, and much more - it means we can have casual conversations, effectively make jokes using things like sarcasm that’s usually hard to understand without context and much more. this “incorrect English” has really opened avenues of online conversation that isn’t accessible with “correct English” which is pretty interesting
My class and I literally taught some of the nuances of this to our english teacher, things such as the difference between “yes” and “yes.” or “..” and “…”. It makes perfect sense linguistically that we would create this complexity to ease communication in a medium without body language and tone, but what my teacher was really floored about was that none of this had ever “learned” it, we’re “native speakers” of a whole new type of english.
“And this is what I love about God: The Church has driven out LGBTQ people for centuries, with an especially intense malice over the last several decades, and in response to this, God just says, okay, fine, we’re good out here. Where you chase my people, I will be with them. Where they gather, I will be there. Clubs. Conversations. Protests. In lament and anger and tears and laughter and way too many drinks. I will be with them and make this right for them. I will love them more fiercely for their wounds. I will draw them close. I will know them and they will know me. They will tell you my name.”—Ben Moberg (via azspot)
i really like the advice “write marginalized characters but don’t write about marginalization unless you experience it”
absolutely i think cis people should expand their horizons and write trans characters, but they shouldn’t write stories about being trans. likewise i think allistic / NT authors should write about autistic characters! but not stories about being autistic.
represent us. absolutely. but don’t tell our stories. let us do that.
I was thinking today about Les Amis getting really legitimately excited when they hit a crossroads in their discussion/planning and Combeferre pulls out the legal pad and pushes his glasses up his nose and announces it’s time for the Pro’s and Con’s list.
a reveal fic in which adrien and someone (literally any someone, but marinette would probably be most likely to know) would take a picture and say cheese, and plagg comes zooming out. and adriens just like. PLAGG NOOOOOO
i see that you said fic. i acknowledge that you said fic. but holy shit.
Adrien: But if I'm Chat Noir and Chat Noir has a crush on Ladybug and Ladybug is actually Marinette and Marinette has a crush on me then that means…we actually have a crush on each other.
Plagg *sleepily*: She’s literally lying in bed beside you. You’re married. Go back to sleep.
hawkmoth is the kingpin of the notorious crime ring terrorizing paris under the name “Akuma”
organized crime is at an all time high, and no one feels safe anymore
surprise surprise, the police are useless
enter: marinette duapin cheng, sweet and cunning and tired of seeing her city being terrorized
so she obscures her identity, setting out into the night streets armed only with her wits, 7 years of aikido lessons, and the burning desire to clean up the streets
soon all the tabloids are talking about
a faceless heroine dubbed “the ladybug“ taking down muggers left and right around paris’ seedy underbelly
enter: adrien agreste, who’s inspired by the stories and tired of living his oppressively structured life
so he suits up as well, masking his recognizable face as he and his fencing sabers seek out the mysterious vigilante
he helps ladybug out of a tight spot, they team up
im talking infiltrating hideouts
im talking “cut off one head and two more take its place”
im talking red-x’d pictures and yarn stretched across a cork board
imagine the student in their class arguing. “well i think they should just leave it to the authorities!” chloe shouts. “yeah, like the cops could do anything without the help of Ladybug and Chat Noir,” Alya counters
half of paris loves the duo, and the other half want them off the streets for good
its basically netflix daredevil au at this point I KNOW
what she means:
in episode 10 of miraculous ladybug, heartbreaker doesn't just conjure feelings of hate out of thin air. he perverts existing feelings of love, so it stands to reason that the more someone cared for the person they loved, the more they would hate them once affected. couples were seen storming away from each other and alya and sabrina committed cruel but petty acts against their best friends but chat noir loves ladybug so much that after he'd been effected he tried to FUCKING DESTROY HER
For some reason I am really attached to the idea of Adrien making bad first impressions on people because of the association with Chloe? And then blowing them out of the water just by being his cinnamon roll self. So this idea jumped out at me as inspired by the scene in Origins where Adrien literally flings himself off his climbing wall like an idiot who has definitely done that before and will do it again.
Like imagine early on, maybe the second day of school before everyone has figured out what a sweetheart he is, they have gym class, and no one knew they had to explain to Adrien about wearing gym clothes so he’s wearing jeans and impractical footwear. And of course, he appologizes profusely to the teacher, saying he didn’t know there was gym today and didn’t bring anything to change into, completely unaware that Chloe uses this excuse all the time. So the class is collectively rolling their eyes, and the gym teacher is aggravated, because the last thing he needs is another rich brat thinking the rules don’t apply to them, so he decides to make an example.
He says today’s lesson is very important and so he’ll have to make due barefoot, and that he can even come up first and help show the rest of the class what they’re doing today. And Nino and Marinette, plus some of the more kindhearted students are all wincing on his behalf, while everyone else feels pretty vindictive about getting to watch Chloe’s friend embarrass himself.
Of course Adrien is an oblivious sweetheart and is just completely thrilled that not only does he not have to sit out his first ever gym class for being unprepared, he gets to go first! And so of course he beams and agrees enthusiastically, to which most people present become suspicious over what he has planned, while Nino and Marinette bemoan that their new friend is too good for this world.
As luck, and Narrative convenience, would have it, the first activity for that day is the Climbing Wall. (Their school is fucking fancy they would definitely have one) Everyone fears and loathes the Climbing Wall, because it’s difficult and terrifying, and there are no harnesses, just thick mats to break your fall. No one’s ever actually been injured on it, but there are plenty enough urban legends going around the school to convince the general student body that it’s a deathtrap.
There are collective looks of sympathy, because not even one of Chloe’s lackeys deserves the Climbing Wall (so dreaded that its name is always capitalized) on their first day in gym.
Adrien is understandably completely thrilled because he has one just like it at home and he is gonna rock this. Pun definitely intended.
The gym teacher explains the rules (start behind the red line, run when the whistle blows, go as fast as you can, timer stops after you’ve hit the roof and made it back down to the ground) Adrien is practically vibrating with excitement, Marinette thinks she’s about to die of second hand embarrassment, Nino is biting his nails, Chloe is trying to hide a smirk and no one knows why (she’s been to Adrien’s house, after all), and everyone else is sitting back, ready to watch Adrien fall all over himself.
The gym teacher blows his whistle and Adrien is off like a fucking shot, sprinting to the wall and then making his way up it just as quickly. His class is half certain that he is somehow part monkey, and Marinette and Nino have just enough time to share a relieved look before he taps the ceiling and then launches himself into open air.
Several people shriek in horror, but Adrien rolls expertly when he hits the mats, and comes up grinning, only a little out of breath, and asks what his time was.
There is a moment of silence before the gym teacher let’s out a terrified and furious screech of “AGRESTE!”
Adrien turns red with shame and guilt, and because he is a cinnamon roll to his core, completely misinterprets what he did wrong.
“Sorry! Is that not allowed? I should have thought- sorry.” He rubs the back of his head sheepishly “I can go back up and climb down again properly, if you want sorry.”
At this point he is under the inspection of the baffled stares of everyone in the room and the gym teacher is put in the position to explain that no, the problem wasn’t that that was cheating, it’s that you flung yourself into the air with no regard for life and limb and gave everyone a collective heart attack, and you are never going up on that thing again for all our sakes.
Which prompts Adrien to be like “Oh! But there were mats, I thought that’s what they were there for, plus they’re a much better target than my couch back home and I’ve only missed that twice.”
“You’ve done this before? With a couch? WHY?”
“Because the floor was lava. Uh, Sir.”
And that is how the entire class found out that Adrien Agreste is a precious sunbeam with no regard for his own safety who must be protected at all costs.
Semi obbsessing over the idea of Adrien getting used to having friends like yeah hed be over eager at first and at school but like what about the stuff he never thought about like just simple shit like Nino texting him at 3 am like “do you think dogs are racist to other breeds of dogs would that be fucked up or what?” and adrien just sitting there like ???????????? And googling what he should do
no lie I really want to believe this is what they talk about
Adrien shows up to school with like 14 printed out articles on dog aggression towards other dogs and Nino is so fucking excited because he sent the same text to Alya and she only responded with “GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP”. Marinette is visibly upset for the rest of the day after learning about dog racism.
