Headcanon that McGonagall is offended on a personal level that Umbridge loves cats.
This literally got 600 more notes just while I was at dinner what the fuck
How has nobody thought about this before tbh
Ok but imagine McGonagall in cat form prowling around the castle, in strategically chosen places so that Umbridge will come across her.
Umbridge takes the cat back to her office and feeds it a little saucer of milk. The cat starts coming back to Umbridge’s office around the same time every night, until eventually Umbridge gets into a little routine of setting out a saucer of milk for the cat before bed.
McGonagall now has all the best secrets on Umbridge, all of the results of the evaluations, and most importantly, is in a perfect position to spy on the ministry for the Order of the Phoenix.
I would honestly prefer reading about the stupid paranormal romance where the weird non-human boyfriend can’t work out the DVD player over Brooding Manipulative and Controlling asshole trope
[screaming at the DVD player] IM 800 YEARS OLD CUT ME SOME SLACK
“Unless you know how to work a 15th-century printing press you can stop laughing and show me how to Twitter again.”
natasha having visceral reactions to disney movies and old American cartoons
natasha not reacting to the cold because she trained in the snow in shorts and a tank top
natasha hoarding her food
natasha seeing someone not eating for an extended period and fetching them something from the fridge and silently setting it down beside them and walking away before they notice
natasha reciting all the states in alphabetical order when tony jokingly suggests that none of the avengers could do it
natasha always counting everyone after major battles because she’s seen friends die too many times before
natasha having nightmares that she’ll do to her new friends what she was forced to do to the old
Stan Lee says characters should stay how they were intended to be.
>Peter Parker shouldn’t be black, and Black Panther shouldn’t be Swiss.
>Says there’s no reason to change the characters when you can just make new ones.
>Tells people to create their own characters instead of changing existing ones.
>Also mentions how wanting a white character to stay white doesn’t make you anti-black/Latino/etc. because most people also wouldn’t want a black character to stop being black.
——-
My opinion:
He’s completely right.
Stan’s the man.
THANK YOU Stan Lee for being a famous person who speaks the truth instead of bowing under SJWbullshit pressure.
School:
haha there is no need for students to be stressed out about the exams .....,,,,, they r well prepared if they did the 12 hours of homework daily
Students:
if i throw myself down these stairs i have three more weeks to study
Me reading a retelling of an Arthurian legend:
It's amazing how I can love Merlin in one version and hate him in another. It's so much fun to see all ways people imagine King Arthur as a good or bad king, and I love seeing characters like Nimue and Mordred depicted in all sorts of ways, from wicked through and through to being misunderstood and full of goodness. There are so many ways to imagine these characters, and none are wrong!
Me reading a version in which Guinevere isn't a good person:
why is this book so full of sin
One time I was working at the jewelry counter at work and I was showcasing some diamond necklaces to an older lady and I was always taught to try to connect with people in order to make a sale and so we were talking about her husband blah blah blah and she goes “are you married”
…………
Now the normal response to say is no, since I am not married
However I didn’t comprehend what she said and I was like yeah
So I quickly had to switch my ring on to my ring finger and make up a fictional spouse on the spot
And to this day she comes in periodically asking about my wife Morgan (who is now pregnant with twins!) and I mean I have been stuck with this alternate fictional life for a year and a half now
Our anniversary is Wednesday if anyone wants to get us anything
But, I’m sorry, Bernie Sanders 100% has my vote. He stands for everything I stand for. Not just some things like Hillary. I’ve been told that I’m not a “real feminist” since I don’t plan to vote for her. I want to see a female president just as much as anyone else does. But Sanders could lead this country in a wonderfully amazing direction and I am confident that he has a lot more to offer than Clinton does. Sorry not sorry.
Being a real feminist doesn’t mean voting for a woman because she’s a woman. It means voting for the candidate that will best advance women’s issues. Bernie Sanders is that candidate.
So I went to the eye doctor, right, and I sit down to fill out the paperwork like you do and the lady was like “Thanks, Doctor Doctor will be with you in a moment” and I was like why did she say doctor twice that’s weird but then I looked at the business cards on the table and his name was actually Dr. Chad Dockter and I looked around and the other assistant caught my eye and just nodded like “You just had the moment didn’t you”
full name, everything, told me to go crazy and spend spend spend. I’ve never spoken to him before, and he was only on the phone for 11 minutes.
An hour later he asks why I didn’t buy anything.
I didn’t buy anything because I have fucking common sense. If you get a guys credit card number that you don’t know and buy something you are fucking up. All it takes is for him to call to his credit card company to claim fraud, and to get my full real name, my address, and cops at my door. I dunno how many girls he’s called trying this, but I know a lot of new girls are on niteflirt, and I know a lot you are kind of desperate for money. I know the idea is great, but don’t ruin yourself over money you’re not even going to get.
….Why are so many none sex workers and underage people reblogging this?
Could slightly relevant out of context to the people who the online chat thing to kinda keep em aware of predators and mean people.
Yeah I was underage non sex worker once and with a guy who sent me lots of gift cards, and not knowing any better if he had ever sent a credit card number I would’ve gotten myself into some shit.
Ah
yeah it’s just a good anti-fraud thing to know
is this on the phone? because if it’s on the computer couldn’t you print the messages and show them to the judge for your innocents and still get to use the money before hand?
Even if it was, that doesn’t matter, it’s still credit card fraud regardless because the card holder says it is. Don’t put yourself at risk. It’s best to just avoid the whole situation
I was told by my professors that Kitty Genovese was a 28-year-old unmarried woman who was attacked, raped, and brutally murdered on her way home from her shift as manager of a bar. I was told that numerous people witnessed the attack and her cries for help but didn’t do anything because they “assumed someone else would”. Nobody intervened until it was too late.
Now… is it likely that people overheard Kitty’s cries for help and ignored them because they thought someone else would deal with it? Or, perhaps, did they ignore her because they knew she was a lesbian and just didn’t care?
Maybe that’s not the case. Maybe it was just a random attack. Maybe her neighbours didn’t know she was gay, or didn’t care.
But it’s a huge chunk of information to leave out about her in a supposedly scientific study of events, since her sexuality made her much more vulnerable to violent crimes than the average person. And it’s a dishonour to her memory.
RIP Kitty Genovese. Society may only remember you for how you died, but I will remember you for who who were.
this was one of the first lessons I had in psych too and we were never told about this either nor was it in any of the reading materials
I don’t want to downplay the possible impact that Genovese’s sexuality had on her being a victim of brutal violence, but it’s worth noting that the popular narrative around the attack is very probably a myth. The “numerous eyewitnesses saw the attack and did nothing” narrative was spun out of wholecloth by the police and regurgitated by salacious reporting in the NY Times. The police claimed, and the Times repeated, that thirty-eight people actually watched the attack for half an hour while doing nothing - none of which could be corroborated by later investigation.
At least one author claims the actual number of eyewitnesses was between four and six, of whom two genuinely refused to get involved. Two of the other witnesses actually did call the police… only to be put on hold, and for no squad car to be dispatched even when they actually got through. And another person rushed out after the stabbing to try and help Genovese, although she was too late.
It irks me no end that this story is still routinely taught in psych classes, because it’s most likely a lie made up by the police to cover their asses and spread by the media to sell papers. There are real, important lessons to take from the way society failed to prevent Genovese’s murder. But we should be careful about the stories we tell about it.
nah I think we should really stop glorifying cigarettes
you sound boring.
You sound like you’ve never had the scent of cigarette smoke ingrained in your clothes to the point where people in middle school thought you smoked at eleven because your parents couldn’t be bothered to go outside. You sound like you’ve never had your mother flick cigarette ashes out of the car window and have them fly into your face. You sound like you’ve never been kept up at night by the sound of your dad hacking up a lung because he has to get up for his midnight smoke. You sound like you’ve never had to run into a convenience store to get your mother cigarettes as soon as you turned eighteen and cringed at touching the box because you know they’re not only killers but government sanctioned killers because they can not only tax the shit out of them but ensure people buy more at the cost of young lungs and a once beautiful home now plagued with the smell of smoke and ash. You sound like you’ve never had a great grandmother who stopped smoking 30 years before her death who still got lung cancer and subsequently died. You sound like a Fucking ignoramus. Smoking isn’t Fucking cool, it isn’t fun to glorify, it’s disgusting and makes not only you but your children smell bad. Makes not only you but your children cough, get cancer, get sick.
You sound like a Fucking moron. Smoking isn’t cool. Grow the Fuck up.
[guy to bi girl]:
lol so like... would u fuck my gf and let me watch? ;)
[girl to bi dude]:
omg if you get a boyfriend will you be my gay best friend?????
[straight people]:
omg you're gay? you don't have a crush on me do you??? #nohomo
[gay people]:
umm... stop invading our safe spaces you hetero... you're not allowed to pride parade if you're in a straight relationship and you're more privileged because you can have a straight passing relationship... so... bye lmao
[old people]:
your sexuality isn't real
[lesbian to bi girl]:
um i just can't date you because you may have had sex with a guy?? and also what if you ended up cheating on me with one and leaving me for him?
marvel are not fucking around with antman they know no one gives a shit about that movie and so they slip not only cap but our sweet prince bucky into the fucking end credit scene so we have to see the whole movie marvel is across this shit well played
omg guys the end credits scene will be on the internet 8 seconds after the premiere. don’t give antman money.
In Jurassic world when the pterodactyl picked up and threw down the baby triceratops I saw the exact moment I’d risk my life to save a baby dinosaur and try to fight a full fucking grown pterodactyl
it’s misogynist, heavy-handed, and undoes nearly all of the feminist brilliance from the film. Graphic rape & abuse, graphic violence… like, honestly. Don’t inflict this comic on yourself, and don’t give Vertigo any money for creating this kind of misogynistic trash.
the best part of jurassic world is that it sets up claire to be the damsel in distress and that owen is inevitably going to have to save her, but more often than not it’s claire who’s saving the day. and she does it without losing any of femininity, she kicked ass and outran a t-rex while wearing her floaty skirt and heels god bless
Stop saying characters who act slightly different are autistic.
Stop saying characters that are both male and friends are gay.
Stop saying characters who don’t act like their gender norms are trans.
Stop saying characters who never mention anything about sex are asexual.
Because these “headcanons” keep harmful stereotypes from finally dying off.
Nope.
I’m going to say it.
Marginalised kids who, in their hunger for any scrap of media representation, latch onto the smallest hints that their beloved characters might be like them, are not responsible for any part of their own marginalisation. Ever.
If someone looks at a character and sees a reflection of themselves and it makes them feel good to pretend that the representation that doesn’t actually exist for them is there somehow? Good for them.
It’s respectability politics garbage to tell marginalised kids that they need lots and lots of evidence that their favourite characters are like them before they’re even alowed to imagine it, just in case someone higher in the kyriarchy sees it and thinks, “Ah! This stereotype is Now Officially Confirmed and I can Be Oppressive with a Clear Conscience.”
Stop blaming marginalised people for their own oppression 2kEver
Your problematic behavior is not excused because you have been oppressed. You are continuing the cycle of oppression to other marginalized communities and you of all people know better.
Shape. The. Fuck. Up.
My brother and his husband are the biggest pieces of shit when it comes to racism and transphobia. Please don’t think just because someone is oppressed that they won’t oppress others and treat them like shit. Don’t let them get away with it.
what is your favorite assassination story in history?
Some people who’ve been following me for a while probably have picked up that I love the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Although all the political mechanisms behind his assassination are fascinating as well, especially because, y’know, it led to world war 1, the actual assassination story is my favorite. (Because it was so hilariously botched)
You guys probably already know it but GUESS WHAT I’M TELLING IT AGAIN. (Im not gonna source though ‘cause I’m lazy sorry)
So, ahem. Story time. Gather round, children.
External image
There’s this dude named Franz and he was heir presumptive to the Austro-Hungarian throne back in 1914. So he went to inspect some imperial troops in Boznia and Herzegovina, which were provinces of Austria-Hungary. This pissed off a bunch of Serbian nationalists, who thought the territories should be part of the Serbian nation.
External image
But I don’t really care about that. What’s important was that Franz and his wife were in Sarajevo and a terrorist group called the Black Hand decided to off him.
So Franz and his wife are touring around this city in an open-topped car, doing their whole royal wave thing. The Black Hand actually sent six assassins after the Ferdinands, just to make absolutely sure they died. The first guy actually chickened out so he’s not really important. The second assassin comes up all “Yeah i’m gonna kill these guys” so he throws a grenade at the car and it BOUNCES OFF and although it injures some people nearby, the Ferdinands are completely fine. So the dude’s like “oh shit” so he takes a cyanide pill and throws himself into a river so he won’t be taken by the authorities.
Unfortunately for him, though, the cyanide pill was expired and the river was six inches deep so the police just pulled him out and took him off to jail. All the other assassins kinda just gave up and wandered off. One of the assassins, Gavrilo Princip, was like “well screw this, i’m hungry” so he left to get a sandwich.
He was in the middle of ordering said sandwich when he heard the sound of a car stalling behind him. Turns out the Ferdinand’s drivers had gotten messed up by the crowds and accidentally took a wrong turn and then stalled RIGHT NEXT TO PRINCIP. So of course Princip was like “what a crazy random happenstance” and shot them both and started world war one.
So yeah, that’s my favorite assassination story because it’s great.
do you ever want to gently float up to someone and whisper “this isn’t a debate; i am actually educated on the subject and i’m telling you you’re wrong”
Despite Twilight’s flaws I think we can all appreciate what Rosalie Hale did to her gang of rapists after she became a vampire
One of Twilight’s biggest flaws was always that um, how do I put this? It has these kickass supporting characters with these fascinating back stories and instead we have to pay attention to this truly boring couple instead of hearing about Jasper fighting in a vampire war, or Alice as a psychic girl in a 1920’s mental institution, or Carlyle as a vampire doctor trying to atone for all the murdering he did.
Or Leah as the ONLY BIOLOGICALLY FEMALE WEREWOLF IN THE WORLD, or that other vampire baby from South America.
Or pretty much anything beyond Bella and Edward staring at one another and crying.
I’ve heard that a lot.
Even a lot of people that HATE Twilight are intrigued by the supporting characters and sincerely wish we had gotten a book about one of them instead.
It’s like Meyer made the most boring characters she ever conceived the stars and made her actual good ideas background ornaments,
