Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

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June 2016

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Jun 3, 2016 200,890 notes
#LAUGH RULE #FUCKING #I'M DYING #XMEN
Jun 3, 2016 22,533 notes
#HEAVY BREATHING #ororo munroe #xmen

ofhouseadama:

kyrispirits:

pottermoosh:

You can always spot which Tumblr users migrated over here from LiveJournal because we consistently call the Read More button ‘the cut’.

#is it not the cut????

#you can take ‘behind the cut’ away from me when you pry it from my cold dead hands #get off my lawn (via themiddleliddle)

I’ve never been on LiveJournal in my life and ‘under the readmore’ is just weird as shit.

Jun 3, 2016 24,056 notes
#under the cut #definitely

wandamaxmioff:

wandamaxmioff:

Okay so many of you know about Ramadan, the month in the islamic calander where every muslim who’s not travelling, pregnant, breastfeeding, diabetic or on their period or is ill or elderly has to fast from dawn until sunset and refrain from smoking, sex, swearing, etc. Instead of sending everyone I follow what I would like them to tag as #nsfr (not safe for ramadan), here is a list of things to tag:

  • food
  • nudes/ nsfw
  • kissing/ pda
  • smoking
  • bad language

I’d appreciate it if people reblog this so every muslim doesn’t have to ask the 400+ blogs they follow to tag stuff. Thanks!

This year it’s gonna fall on June 6th to July 6th, I believe :)

Jun 3, 2016 98,719 notes
explain the reason for your url
Jun 3, 2016 163,480 notes
#i'm a writer #and a poetical dick

exfoliate:

sapphicsupergirl:

“why aren’t u talking abt this one Problematic thing involving that actor/show u like??”

listen. i am tired. im putting down my pitchfork. i’ll acknowledge that thing was bad if it was but im tired of vilifying ppl for their mistakes just bc they’re famous. i want to enjoy things. i want Peace

For a long time I was second guessing everything I liked because they did this or that wrong, the actors did this, the writers did that, they left out this or ignored that… It’s just too much.

It’s just so tiring. Acknowledge where they can do better, but give yourself a break for the things you like. No one is perfect and you can like things that aren’t perfect.

Jun 2, 2016 159,263 notes
Jun 2, 2016 30,915 notes
#saynotohydracap

monstersblogofmonsters:

My anaconda don’t want none unless you got guns
And ships
And so the balance shifts

Jun 2, 2016 21,375 notes
#hamilton #i did this entire song for my mom today #literally just to prove that i could #and she was just like #'i've been listening to you talk fast your whole life and that was genuinely terrifying' #i'm very proud of myself
REBLOG if you are old enough to remember what a VCR is.

cat-pun:

it’s a shame a lot of kids today will never know about Very Cool Reptiles

Jun 2, 2016 329,302 notes
Jun 2, 2016 15,215 notes
#hamilton #ANGELICA 'BOUT TO FUCK A BITCH UP #SLAY HIM ANGELICA SLAY HIM #i love how she looks in this picture #all shadowy and powerful and wrapped around eliza's light #and her eyes are so cold and furious #better sleep with one eye open alex

cptndorito:

one of the many things I super love about Deadpool is that they treat negasonic teenage warhead like a teenager, sure she has awesome as fuck superpowers but she doesn’t have any sort of romantic hints, she isn’t irresponsible with her powers, she has a guardian with her when she does her (awesome) dangerous shit, she is most definitly not treated like a child, but she is also not treated like an adult, she has a responsible guardian with her when necessary who even tries to feed her protein bars, I think that hollywood tends to forget that there is an in between stage, that teenagers do exist and need to be represented as something other than unrealistically mature or unrealistically immature 

Jun 2, 2016 49,702 notes
#deadpool #negasonic teenage warhead
Jun 2, 2016 18,566 notes
Jun 2, 2016 326,408 notes

devipotato:

devipotato:

as a general rule if you see some “cool trick” on the internet that involves combining chlorine of any form (including bleach or tablets) with anything else, you shouldn’t do it because they are almost definitely trying to seriously hurt or kill people who don’t know any better. things like mixing bleach with other “household cleaning supplies” are especially huge red flags–it sounds harmless, but the chemicals in these things react to create extremely toxic gas, or worse

stuff like that almost universally comes from places like 4chan where it’s fun and cool to misinform people in the most dangerous possible ways, and it’s nothing short of evil that people use something as incredible as the internet to literally kill strangers for no reason

you would not believe the amount of responses i’ve gotten to this post that amount to “if they’re dumb enough to follow those instructions they deserve to die” and even “it’s hilarious when idiots do this" 

y'all know that these are real living people right? that there are very real people, including minors, including young children and teenagers, that are being harmed by this. this isn’t a hypothetical. this isn’t fun and games. if your response to this shit is “they deserved it”, or “who cares about idiots who do this”, you are completely lacking in any kind of human compassion and i’d appreciate it if you kept your hateful comments to yourself. i’m sick of reading them. 

NO ONE deserves to be hospitalized or literally be killed because some jackass on the internet thought it’d be fun to anonymously hurt strangers on purpose. when someone is given dangerous instructions to create toxic gas under the guise of a fun harmless experiment and decides to try it, it’s not their fault for being tricked–it’s absolutely the fault of the people giving them that information. it’s completely malicious intent on their part and the fact that so many of y'all find that behavior excusable in any way is disgusting 

literally thousands of people are accidentally exposed to chlorine gas every year (over 6000 in 2014), and even chlorine gas exposures as low as 3ppm can cause “extreme irritation of the eyes and respiratory tract”. concentrations above 30 ppm are a lot more severe and can result in hospitalization, and above that there’s a risk for permanent lifelong respiratory damage, and potentially death. it’s uncertain exactly how concentrated the chlorine gas created from tricks like the ones i mentioned would be, but many of them do include directions like “blowing on it to increase the reaction”, which means victims will have their face very close to the solution and inhaling it directly–which is very very bad. 

it’s especially bad because minors who are exposed to this shit are both more likely to fall for it (because they do not have the life experience to know better) and more likely to suffer severe damage due to their physiology.

i made this post as a warning and to help people who didn’t know not to mix these things. i have had multiple people–even adults–thank me for this post because they hadn’t learned this yet. i’m glad that it’s gotten that information out there. but the amount of people condemning me and mocking me for daring to giving a shit about other living breathing human beings is completely abhorrent and i’m sick of it 

so yeah. don’t mix household cleaners together. don’t mix bleach with literally anything that isn’t just water. don’t follow directions that ever tell you to use these things, because there are absolutely terrible people on the internet and you deserve to be safe.

Jun 2, 2016 30,873 notes

lililibird:

ofswordsandpens:

accioangelo:

ofswordsandpens:

Friendly reminder that -

  • Percy’s neutral expression is a natural brooding look that he gets from Poseidon
  • That when he does smile it’s crooked and makes him look like a trouble maker
  • When he talks it’s usually very sarcastic and/or impertinent 
  • His inner monologue is actually very negative and while we, as the readers, take it as a joke he’s usually pretty pessimistic for a good portion of the time
  • That when he’s fighting his expression is fierce and is hard to tell whether he is the good guy or not
  • That Leo Valdez equated Percy’s angry expression to the feeling he gets when Jason is about to shoot lightning. Let me repeat - just the look on Percy’s face when he’s angry was considered on par to Jason controlling flipping lightning
  • That he’s very very vindictive and loyal only to those he considers his friends and once you lose his trust it is nearly impossible to earn back 
  • That while he had the curse of achilles, he laughed crazily while he was single handedly destroying hordes of monsters
  • He made an entire volcano erupt, awakened a giant, and almost wiped out the northwest of the united states
  • He tortured a godess just so she would feel his misery
  • That he’s actually very manipulative and it made Annabeth step back for a moment and reevaluate her perception of him
  • That while his dark side came to it’s peak in house of hades and wasn’t mentioned in blood of olympus, there was no confirmation that it suddenly and completely disappeared after they left Tartarus.
  • Has been the child of the prophecy twice.
  • He manipulated Bob to kill his own brother by simply convincing him that they were friends and that is what friends did for each other
  • He was physically abused by his step father
  • That with absolutely no training at all he killed the minotaur with it’s own horn at the mere age of twelve
  • He wins a good majority of his fights by simply outsmarting his opponent 
  • He has scared not only Annabeth but his friends and peers on more than one occasion with his attitude and powers
  • That he’s considered extremely powerful for a demigod and for a child of the big three and makes the gods slightly nervous
  • That when he’s upset his powers act to mimic his emotions without him even trying
  • Has been offered immortality
  • That he is actually really sorta intimidating without trying 
  • That we need to stop reducing Percy’s character to a happy-go-lucky comic relief goofball that doesn’t know his left foot from right because he is so much more than that

Everyone looks at Percy like the stereotypical hero that loves everything and puppies and rainbows but he’s actually very dark and quite scary and that’s why all the Dark!Percy AU’s aren’t really that far from the real Percy, he’s just on a different team.

Also, anyone who places Percy into anything but Slytherin is very wrong. #7 on this list is practically proclaiming his belonging to the house of the snakes.

Marry me

If anyone ever tells me that they just ‘don’t see’ Percy being like that (i.e. dark and scary), I just ask them one thing: “What do you think Percy would’ve done if Annabeth was taken instead of him, by Hera?”

Answers range from “Tear Olympus to the ground with his bare hands.”, “Snap Zeus’ neck and yell a lot.”, “Find where she is in a matter of days and never help the gods again, ever.”, and “Probably torture Hera in his basement until she tells him what she did to his Wise Girl.” 

You can almost see the burning realization in their eyes that they finally recognize that he’s a terrifying soldier who’ll brutally murder people, gods, and monsters, if need be.

I 100% believe that monsters are somewhat, if not extremely, scared of Perseus Jackson. They probably tell ghost stories about him at night. The more intelligent ones probably decide not to attack him if they sense his aura in the area, because they want to live. He’s probably known to them as the new Hercules or whatever, known for never losing a fight against a monster, and defeating Kronos (they probably aren’t aware of Luke’s sacrifice I think).

And if you don’t think that part of the reason Zeus hates/hated Percy, was because he didn’t like how powerful this son of Poseidon was, then I recommend you go reread the series. If you haven’t noticed that the gods render Percy in just a little higher light than other demigods (he’s allowed to say pretty much whatever he wants, like stuff that would make them try to murder anyone else within seconds), you should know, that they know he’s dangerous.

I firmly believe that the gods call him their ‘weapon’ at strategy meetings (especially Athena, who doesn’t want to personify the sea scum dating her favorite daughter), the wild card pick. They have to value him, and I’d bet you anything that Poseidon’s ‘check-ins’ had an underlying tone of making sure that Percy wasn’t resentful towards the gods ever again, after having the whole Luke fiasco.

I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if some minor gods were stationed to randomly make sure that Annabeth wasn’t going to get hurt too badly, or kidnapped, when she was out on her own, because nobody wanted Percy to destroy a few countries over her. 

There has to be a darkness in any human being who’s gone through what Percy has, and the fact that he can still joke around, and laugh and kiss his girlfriend at the end of the day, makes him all that much more scarier. I’d appreciate it if the fandom would start to realize these things, and I would’ve really appreciated it if Rick Riordan had but it’s too late for that now.

(Sorry for the long post anyone not in the HoO or PJO fandom.)

Jun 2, 2016 49,393 notes
#pjo #YES THANKS

allieinarden:

virtuouspagans:

whenever I feel bad about having a weird name I remind myself that C.S. Lewis’ middle name was Staples 

When I was a kid, one of my family members quoted the first line of Dawn Treader—“There was a boy named Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it"—and I said, “Brave words from a man whose name was Clive Staples Lewis,” and my mom lost it. 

Jun 2, 2016 189,945 notes
#i'm DYING

consonant:

consonant:

consonant:

if i were a drink i’d be cherry vanilla coke

if you were a drink what would you be

everyone’s like “bleach” or “sewage” please calm down edgelords

Jun 2, 2016 231,663 notes
#some kind of caffeinated tea #with a bite

bemusedlybespectacled:

slythwolf:

it was a fanfic that made me realize this but.

so the stormtroopers right. if they think u didnt fire ur blaster they inspect it & if you didnt they send you for reconditioning.

maybe. thats why. they never. HIT. anything.

they dont want to be punished but they dont really want to hurt anybody.

maybe.

DUDE

Jun 2, 2016 58,978 notes
#star wars #I LIKE THIS #i've actually considered this before #i think tiny bb!moran brought this up after the first time i saw star wars #because #like #either they're ALL REALLY INCOMPETENT #or they're missing on purpose
Jun 2, 2016 164,544 notes

stone-monkey:

Can we just appreciate the fact that the actress who plays Negasonic Teenage warhead in Deadpool, Brianna Hildebrand, has a girlfriend?:

Jun 2, 2016 55,284 notes
#I ADORE THIS PERSON #deadpool #negasonic teenage warhead #negasonic is my favorite i love her #AND APPARENTLY HER ACTRESS IS JUST AS AWESOME
Jun 2, 2016 165,264 notes
Arnold is still playing the terminator at 70, Stallone is still Rambo at 65, so why do we need a new Xena: Warrior Princess? Lucy Lawless is only in her 40s, ffs.

chandri:

chandri:

textualdeviance:

Reminded of people saying Katee Sackhoff, Katheryn Winnick, and Anna Torv are “too old” to play Carol Danvers becase they’re >35.

RDJ is 50, assholes.

Okay, this is the sixth time this has crossed my dash and I could no longer resist: 

Carol Danvers is a Colonel in the United States Air Force. The average age of USAF officers, full-stop, is 35*, and only 14% of all USAF officers are younger than 26*. The average age of a Colonel is 49.** Even if we assume they’re introducing an earlier-career Carol, a Lieutenant Colonel averages 45** and a Major 39**, so technically just about every actress I’ve seen suggested is more than a decade too young for the role.***

Not that that’s out of the ordinary for women on screen, who are routinely cast as younger than is even remotely feasible for their stated professions, particularly in military stories (unless you count Star Trek, though since a) the human lifespan in the Federation is drastically longer than ours and b) THAT IS A SCIENCE FICTION SERIES SET IN THE DISTANT SOCIALIST UTOPIAN FUTURE it’s probably not super-relevant; the closest-to-reality portrayal - Stargate won awards for its faithful representation of the USAF - I can actually think of right now is Sam Carter, who makes Major at ~32, Lieutenant Colonel at 36 and full-bird Colonel at 39, BUT THEN AGAIN she is part of a super-rarefied secret program and one of the four smartest people on the planet so adjust for sanity.****

Anyway tl;dr: Hollywood’s ageist/sexist casting double standards are ridiculous and offensive and bad for verisimilitude which is something you’d think an industry founded on convincingly portraying the fictional would care more about, Dear Hollywood, Katee Sackhoff and Katheryn Winnick are great but I would prefer it if you cast a more mature lady as Carol Danvers, please and thank you, obviously I would prefer Amanda Tapping because then you could cast Claudia Black as Jessica Drew and I would EXPIRE FROM JOY but I can learn to live with disappointment.

—

*From the Air Force Personnel Center website.

**These particular statistics are from 1997, but I cannot imagine age ranges have changed as much as gender distribution; someone feel free to correct me. As I understand it, mostly promotions are based on years of service, so they’re unlikely to have changed much above Captain. Consider, too, that USAF officers generally have a shit-ton of advanced education in addition to military training. 60.8% of officers have advanced or professional degrees and 48.6%* have master’s degrees and anybody hoping to make Colonel one day is all but required to have a master’s degree (or equivalent). So assuming you’re being sensible and getting that out of the way up-front while maybe the USAF will pay for it, that’s - start at age 18, bachelor’s degree, master’s degree - your average starting age for active, post-degrees service would be 22-24 depending on what combo of education/training you go with. PROBABLY NOT A LOT OF 25-YEAR-OLD CAPTAINS IS WHAT I’M SAYING.

***All of this is, of course, irrelevant if they do something unpardonably stupid like write out Carol’s military backstory, in which case of course I will burn down the fucking world and salt the earth.

****I will not pretend that the overwhelming majority of my casual knowledge of American military ranks does not come from Stargate or my over-researching because I was writing Stargate fic at the time. Whatever.*****

*****I am so sorry about all the confusing asterisks. My footnotes aren’t even funny like Pratchett’s.

P.P.S. HOW DARE ANYONE EVEN SUGGEST RECASTING LUCY LAWLESS SHE IS THE FLAWLESS AND ETERNAL WARRIOR PRINCESS OF MY HEART AND IF YOU THINK IT’S HARD TO GET PROMOTED ABOVE THE ZONE AS A LADY IN THE REAL WORLD IMAGINE HOW LONG IT TAKES TO BUILD A TERRIFYING REPUTATION CONQUERING SWATHES OF GREECE IN AN ERA BEFORE COMPUTERS OR AIR TRAVEL FIGHT ME OH WAIT NEVER MIND XENA WILL TAKE CARE OF THAT FOR ME

With rumours circulating re: Brie Larson (who is 26) being considered for Captain Marvel, I see it’s time to post this again, because honestly, the research is done and I don’t want to go and do it again.

The thing is, I know they’re going to do it. They’re going to cast someone who is younger than I am to play a character who by all rights, in accordance with her experiences, should be nearly a decade my senior. Even if they write us up a Carol who is a decade earlier in her career than in comics canon (not that that’s any better), 26 is still too young to play a Major, or a Lieutenant-Colonel, or even, IMHO, a Captain, anywhere near convincingly. 

I have a problem with the possibility that this suggests, that they’re writing a Carol who is over a decade younger than the majority of our current cast of white male superheroes, rather than their contemporary. I have a problem with the likelihood that this will mean that her rank will be inferior to the characters that have a rank. Honestly, I have a problem with Carol Danvers calling anyone Sir (especially Captain America), which is partly my thing but honestly is mostly in keeping with her character. And I have a real, serious problem with the outside possibility of them ignoring/wiping out her decades of military service.

I won’t lie: I will watch this movie. Probably more than once, because let’s be real: I’d just be too pathetically grateful that they’d made it at all to do anything else. But I will also criticize the fuck out of anything that disrespects Carol’s history and what she represents. 

I mean… if they ever actually make it. I try not to pay too much attention to “updates” on “progress” any more. It’s just too frustrating.

Jun 2, 2016 48,145 notes
#THANK YOU #now i don't have to do the research
An open note to readers of fanfic

emmagrant01:

Sometimes I stare at the computer screen when the words don’t want to come and I think, “Fuck, who am I kidding? This is terrible writing, and this story is shit, and no one cares, anyway.“  And I close the window and go do something else.

But every now and then I get an amazing, heartfelt, beautiful comment from someone who loved something I wrote, and it reminds me that, at least for that one person, I did write something worthwhile. And so I open the window again and I write one sentence, and then another, and then I start to find my way again.

So on behalf of all fanfic writers everywhere, I want to say thank you, thank you so much, to all of the readers who take the time to leave a comment and tell us that something we wrote mattered to you, that it brightened your day or made you laugh or cry or get horny or whatever.

Please don’t think we’re ever bothered by your comment, or that we don’t want to hear it, or that what you have to say isn’t important enough. It means so, so much. And on some days, it’s what keeps us going.

Jun 2, 2016 51,926 notes

farareusis:

when hamilton says “am I talking too loud? sometimes i get overexcited, shoot off at the mouth” he’s trying to follow burr’s advice of being more personable and keeping his opinions to himself

then immediately after that his new friends say LET’S GET THIS GUY IN FRONT OF A CROWD and i don’t think they had any idea what kind of a pandora’s box they opened at that moment by encouraging him

Jun 2, 2016 3,769 notes
#hamilton #OKAY I'M GOING NOW #I HAVE SHIT TO PACK #I'M LEAVING TOMORROW #*PANICS QUIETLY*

blaalys:

my favorite part of hamilton is when burr is like “you insulted me” and hamilton’s response is literally “i most certainly did, but i need you to be more specific about which instance we’re discussing here. i made an itemized list of all the times i’ve insulted you in the last 30 years, can you please point out which one we’re fighting about today”. 

Jun 2, 2016 13,121 notes
#hamilton #i am storming buckygreyjoy's hamilton tag #brace yourselves #but for real i feel this

feeltheaaronburn:

alexander hamilton is the kind of guy that if someone caught him talking about them behind their back, he’d be all “oh good, you’re here, I won’t have to repeat myself!”

Jun 2, 2016 1,799 notes
#me as fuck #hard same #i feel you alex #hamilton #but for real #adler was really proud of me for all of a minute and a half once #because i was like #'i make it an absolute policy to never say anything behind someone's back that i wouldn't say to their face' #and she went 'aww that's a great policy--wait i have totally seen you call someone a drooling imbecile to their face' #'moran that policy is only good if you don't do stuff like that'
your obedient servant
  • Aaron Burr: SAY THAT TO MY FACE!
  • Alexander Hamilton: Gladly.
Jun 2, 2016 1,592 notes
#me as fuck #tbh #hamilton #hard same #me too alex
Jun 2, 2016 2,020 notes
#hamilton #YOU'LL BE BACK IN A NUTSHELL TBH

hollyjollyhamiltons:

honestly have you ever been to a college’s financial office? its a wonder more people dont get hit. alexander hamilton was probably being completely rational when he punched the bursar.

Jun 2, 2016 715 notes
#hamilton #look #i respect the people who work in our financial aid office #and i have still seriously considered punching them #three years ago i might have done it

runecestershire:

gunpowderandspark:

If nothing else, love Hamilton for having the direction [Eliza Schuyler beatboxes maternally].

If I ever needed proof that Lin-Manuel Miranda is the 21st century’s Shakespeare and Hamilton is just a straight up History play, this is it.

Jun 2, 2016 8,180 notes
#hamilton #I DID NOT KNOW THAT STAGE DIRECTION EXISTED #THAT IS GREAT #BEATBOXING MATERNALLY

neoliberalismkills:

reblog if women with swords

For a second there I was wondering “if women with swords what” and then I realized: women with swords yes.

Jun 1, 2016 251,181 notes
Jun 1, 2016 314,909 notes
#phasma #BOOM
Jun 1, 2016 1,241 notes
#WANT #star wars #it says a lot about me that i'm more interested in literally every au #than i am in canon star wars
Jun 1, 2016 137,667 notes
#history according to tumblr #someone make a movie immediately

friendlyneighborhoodpegacorn:

dynastylnoire:

blxckd-amative:

threehourstonevada:

erdsthenerds:

bastillearda:

gutsygumshoe:

cephalopodvictorious:

gunsounds:

its “thighs rubbing together under ya sundress” season

Buy cute, cheap lace leggings. Cut them a little above your knee. Hem them or don’t, but then you can wear them under your sundresses and not worry about how you sit or if your thighs chafe, and if anyone sees them they look cute af so hell yes

Or a little deodorant between the thighs is magical

Also, LUSH sells this dust called Silky Underwear that makes your skin smooth so they don’t stick together or chafe.

I love that we’re all here for each other in this season of need

Monistat has an anti-chafing gel that works wonders and I live by. You can usually find it in the feminine care aisle of any drugstore. 

There’s this stuff called Glide…pretty cheap & works hella miracles

I’m so ready for sundress season. 

reblog to save a thigh

Jun 1, 2016 668,290 notes
#mom
Jun 1, 2016 238,066 notes
#canon jesus is better than fanon jesus

slyrider:

grandegarlic:

“just because you have ADHD/ADD doesn’t mean that you should not be able to pay attention to things”

??????

like what the fuck do you think the “AD” part of ADHD/ADD stands for ? Aqua Dog?? Amazing Dinosaur ?? Alpha Dong ???

@words-writ-in-starlight

Well, I sure as shit hope it stands for Amazing Dinosaur, I want to upgrade this fragile flesh-prison to something with large teeth and claws.

Jun 1, 2016 80,069 notes
#adventures in adhd #i would like to specifically opt for a raptor if requests are being taken #deinonychus #deinonychus is a favorite of mine

other-romantic-verbs:

Sometimes when I venture into other fandoms I get so stressed out by the drama and the hate and the ship wars, that I scurry back as quick as I can, and thank god for the leverage fandom….the little fandom that could.

Jun 1, 2016 283 notes

suzukiblu:

suzukiblu:

beckyh2112

replied to your

post

:

beckyh2112 replied to your post:I want to hear…

*rolls over, bares her tummy* yesssssss

Also NONE OF THIS makes Vader less vicious or violent out in the world. Sometimes this makes Vader MORE vicious and violent out in the world, in fact, because he figures out slightly quicker than Padmé exactly how much SHARPER she is with him when he’s gone farther than she wanted him to go. And it’s not even the sharpness he wants specifically–it’s the ATTENTION–but he’d never say no to it. When she figures THAT out … hah. Haaaaah. She doesn’t even have to fucking TOUCH him, when she figures that out. 

She DOESN’T touch him when she figures that out. He goes fucking CRAZY with it; he falls the fuck APART with it. She doesn’t even look at him for a full week, not even when he goddamn BEGS her to. The Empire could probably have collapsed without either of them noticing, if the Senate hadn’t known exactly how dead they all would’ve been if it had. 

Just–Padmé Amidala literally riding the FUCKING TIGER here, with the fine line of giving Vader enough Dark to be content with but not enough to damn himself with. As if that even matters, now. As if that COULD matter, now. 

It matters even more, now. 

But what Vader wants from her is so much tenderness, and so much terribleness, and so MUCH, and sometimes Padmé isn’t sure if she’s the bloody bite-mark smeared down his throat or the soft hand stroking through his sticky, sweat-soaked hair. Or worse–if she’s both. What is she, if she is both those things to someone? 

What is she if she is both those things to the GALAXY? 

@words-writ-in-starlight: honestly padme’s internal riding the whirlwind half-panic is so glorious and like i am SO HERE for vader who is so much her servant in every way and when she realizes that ah when she realizes that things change vader goes out and runs wild against her orders and returns with blood on his hands and she greets him with a cool nod and a cursory kiss to the cheek and then she goes back to her work and doesn’t say anything further except a brief reprimand for the wreckage and he is SO LOST in the absence of her grounding him vader goes out on another mission and follows her orders to the letter and when he returns padme makes herself smile and opens her arms and asks ‘what do you want tonight’ ‘what can i give you for making me so happy’ and he falls into her like she is a black hole and he is so far beyond the event horizon and padme holds him close and bites and kisses and bloodies him and he is drunk on it on HER and she is so so afraid of him of herself for the galaxy for her children I LOVE THIS AU SO MUCH

Like I would add more here but WHAT IS THERE TO ADD?? What. What could I even put here? Except maybe the part where Padmé realizes that even as she’s wrapping a tighter leash around Vader’s throat than anyone else ever has, he’s fucking THANKING her for it. He’s always had a leash or a collar or a slave chip, he’s always been OWNED by something or someone, and he’s always hated it. But HER leash, HER rules, HER orders–those aren’t like anyone else’s. He’s HAPPY under her, and all it took was a few thousand murders and betrayals, all it took was killing himself for her. 

Vader doesn’t know how to be free, because the Force doesn’t expect him to be free and even Anakin never really knew how to be. Even though this is the MOST free that either of him has ever been. He could do anything he wanted, go anywhere he wanted, and all he wants is his Master. 

Padmé realizes this. Padmé HATES this. 

Padmé also rewards him when he obeys her, and punishes him when he doesn’t. 

Jun 1, 2016 106 notes
#empress amidala #star wars #okay so vader's relationship to the concept of 'master' here is super interesting #because when he was young #(when ANAKIN was young padme thinks but doesn't say when it comes up) #it was attached to pain and punishment and grief and tears and suffering #and then it was about the jedi #'master this' he says 'master that' #and yet he was expected to care for them #love the jedi ideal in the perfect courtly manner they expected #in the perfect passionless jedi way #and then it was about palpatine #all manipulation and coercion and he could tell he knew he was being wielded #but he was a thing for wielding wasn't he? #and then #and then he realized that for the first time he had a choice #three masters to choose from #palpatine and obi-wan and padme #and padme's hand around his throat is sweet and electric and he is hungry for it #and he probably tells her that at some point #and she has to take a deep breath and let it out slowly without letting her hand in his hair go tense #so that she doesn't scream #or cry #or shove him away #but she breathes #and combs her fingers through his hair #and murmurs that she is glad he chose her #that he is so good for her #so perfect for her #and he rests his head against her knees and sighs

suzukiblu:

suzukiblu:

words-writ-in-starlight:

suzukiblu:

words-writ-in-starlight:

suzukiblu:

words-writ-in-starlight replied to your post: okay my inbox is full of cute stuff and funny…

Okay but say more????

Things Vader has probably asked Padmé for/done his damnedest to provoke her into doing to him: 

  • tie him to the bed 
  • hit him in the face 
  • leave hickeys/bite marks/bruises in places he can’t hide 
  • wax/heat play, possibly to the point of burning 
  • choke him 

Things Padmé has probably ordered Vader to do: 

  • answer to “Anakin” 

Okay on the one hand OW that got painful real fast, but on the other hand that is exactly what I was hoping to get out of that question.  This AU is just so fucking fantastic, I love it.

Look, I’ve been very cracky and fluffy and fun around here lately, I know, but if I go a month without someone being at least mildly traumatized by something I wrote then I will lose all my writerly powers and turn into a pillar of salt and blow away, okay, that’s just how it is. Therefore, Darth Vader is gonna have to learn real quick that every time his Master tells him to lay back and close his eyes, he better start answering to “Anakin” again ASAP or he’s not gonna get hurt the way he likes at ALL. 

*coils protectively around this EXTREMELY EXCELLENT thing*

Cracky fluffy Mace Windu taking Anakin out for truckloads of glowing space ice cream and making morbid jokes is great, but for real I just want to talk about Empress Amidala and Vader and their twins who are probably really strange in this world and how the galaxy reacts when Queen Padme of Naboo is suddenly (and aggressively) promoted and the intricate details of how the Jedi flip their collective shit.

@words-writ-in-starlight: i continue to be trash this au matters to me so much i would murder someone for a movie trilogy set in this au my priorities probably need rejiggering ehhhhhh who gives a fuck not me and not padme because she’s busy trying not to let the galaxy go to shit now that she’s been involuntarily promoted to empress and sith master and person-holding-vader’s-chain (and the whole thing with her ordering him to answer to anakin is SO EXCELLENT) (this is exactly the kind of pain i feed on)

I think she ordered him to answer to “Anakin” exactly once and after that he just kind of had to learn the tells of when she wanted “Anakin” behavior out of him–the difference is so subtle for BOTH of them that it’s sort of a nightmare to get it just right, especially since “Anakin” is not exactly who Anakin actually WAS, just certain parts of Padmé’s perception of him that she knows damn well she’s exaggerating but wants anyway–especially because Padmé does NOT respond well when she does/doesn’t get him when she doesn’t/does want him. 

Vader has an excellent sense of balance, at least. 

It might be funny, if there was anyone left he could make the joke to. Definitely not any of the surviving Jedi. >>;; 

MAN you are right, though, Luke and Leia are probably gonna grow up VERY UNUSUAL children, especially because Padmé will occasionally say things like “here is the list of things you need to lie to your father about no matter what” and VADER will occasionally say things like “eventually you’ll probably want to destroy each other and that’s a very natural feeling but I would recommend not following through on it because ruling the galaxy with a partner to do the parts you don’t like is just SO MUCH better”. 

And meanwhile Luke is such a fucking sunshine bomb and Leia is so very fiercely JUST and KIND, no one is ever gonna believe they’re the Empress and Vader’s. Did–did Obi-Wan Kenobi maybe get Mustafar-ed for causing these two? Are these two HIS fault? 

Okay, no, never mind: they’ll believe it the first time someone lets Princess Amidala anywhere near a lightsaber. They will believe it and FEAR IT. 

@words-writ-in-starlight: WOOOO weird fucked up force twins who are on orders to lie to their father and who are a mystery to the galaxy luke who is just like a fucking space labrador retriever and his sister who is here to kick ass in the name of JUSTICE (maybe they don’t have labs in space because luke is taking up all of the sunshine cuddliness?) and their mother is like on the verge of a breakdown every time leia is talking to vader because it is VERY IMPORTANT that leia and vader have a very particular relationship in which leia doesn’t come down like a hammer on the whole ‘empire vs democracy’ thing (it’s KILLING padme that she can’t publicly train her daughter as a democratic politician) and in which leia learns the force from vader but doesn’t learn…his kind of thinking because padme is sitting there looking at these two kids who are just spilling power left and right like a goblet overfull of wine and she’s just thinking ‘if i let him vader would raise these two as the next part of our dynasty’ vader ADORES his kids he would give them the galaxy in a heartbeat laid out all starlight and fire on a silver platter and he has that option like that option is AVAILABLE to him and padme is TERRIFIED and padme does what needs to be done to save her children

No, no, not here. Padmé does what needs to be done to save the GALAXY. Padmé would die right now if she thought it would leave the galaxy a free Republic again; Padmé would’ve died in the delivery room, would’ve taken the twins with her into the Force, would’ve given up ANYTHING to avoid so much death and darkness. Anakin could never do the math, but Padmé knows that one or two or three versus three THOUSAND is not even a real sacrifice. 

It is a sacrifice, of course. But there’s giving up your own neck for a greater purpose and there’s slitting three thousand unwilling throats on someone else’s altar. 

And Vader really was right when he handed her the Empire. Padmé Naberrie can be Empress Amidala and still be Padmé Naberrie, and she can do the math, and she can hold him back when he’d tear the galaxy past the blood and to the bone and never, ever stop. She knows the difference between making a sacrifice and TAKING one. 

She knows what a Queen must do for her people and really–is an Empress all that different from a Queen, when all is said and done? It’s just another name for something very similar. A sacrifice, and a sacrifice. 

So yes. An Empress is very, very different from a Queen. 

“Let me tell you about how to make a sacrifice,” Padmé Naberrie says with Empress Amidala’s mouth one day when Vader is far away cutting the galaxy to the blood, and the twins look up at her curiously. “Let me tell you what a dynasty is and should never be.” 

Jun 1, 2016 111 notes
#star wars #empress amidala #I FUCKING LOVE THIS #SO FUCKING MUCH #i have very specific things that i get excessively excited about #and really twisted family dynamics is one of them #because padme would sacrifice herself and the twins to have stopped this #but that doesn't change the fact that she loves them with her whole self #loves them enough to teach them how to be all the things that will make them proud of themselves #even if their father doesn't see the necessity #and vader #god #i imagine that vader loves his kids with everything he has #(and everything he has is...it's a lot) #(it's too much to focus on a single person without threatening to burn them up) #(and padme bears up as well as she can forged into steel by the fire of him) #i imagine that vader would sacrifice the entire galaxy for his children without batting an eye #he wouldn't even understand that it was extreme #he would imagine that it was only their due #after all #they're everything #aren't they? #the galaxy should be honored to die for them

jackmeatington:

person: hey are you ticklish at all?
me: *takes 8 steps back*
me: …….no……..

Jun 1, 2016 262,143 notes
I am curious about what the twins think of their parents in the Empress Amidala 'verse. What are the things they are told to lie to their father about?

The twins have four parents. They recognize this fairly early in life, and are mildly surprised when they eventually realize that other children DON’T recognize this about their own parents. 

The twins’ parents are: Empress Amidala, Darth Vader, Padmé [redacted], and [redacted]. They don’t know Padmé’s last name or Darth Vader’s other one, but they know there ARE other names there. Their absence is obvious. 

(once, one time only, one of them catches their father coming home very late and very injured, stumbling into the apartments with his own blood all over himself and his prosthetic smashed and torn and a dazed, distant expression on his face, and on the other side of the room Empress Amidala drops her datapad and Padmé whispers, “Anakin”) 

They see more of Padmé than they ever do of Anakin (whose name they don’t know, really, honestly, they’ve never heard it once). Amidala has missions for Vader, far-away places to send him for long times, and to the twins, for some time, a father is the kind man cloaked in warm Darkness who drifts in and out of their lives to touch their minds with an overpowering love and show them the proper way to hold a lightsaber and throw a full-grown adult in full armor a hundred yards back with just one push. They always know him in the Force, but he is not often close enough for them to see or speak to, at a certain age. 

And at that certain age, every night that Vader is off-planet Padmé closes the apartment doors and teaches them every secret she knows how to. 

And, very importantly, how to lie. 

The twins don’t always understand why knowing how to lie is so important, and especially not how to lie to their father–about certain thoughts, certain feelings, certain reasons for certain things. Leia thinks it’s just Vader they’re supposed to lie to, because of course the two of them are different men. Luke thinks they’re the same man, just they don’t admit it. Either way, they both know that Mother can be Padmé and Amidala in the same breath, doing the exact same thing for two opposing reasons, but Father is only ever Darth Vader. 

(except when Mother calls him that other name, of course; the one that they don’t know) 

Jun 1, 2016 75 notes
#star wars #empress amidala #BECAUSE I CAN IMAGINE #AND IT'S BOTH GLORIOUS AND TERRIFYING #i love this so much
Jun 1, 2016 75,255 notes
#GOD BLESS THIS KID #THIS KID KNOWS WHAT'S UP #vaccinate your spawn #vaccinations
Jun 1, 2016 90,701 notes
Jun 1, 2016 10,332 notes
#like shit #i'm white and i'm fucking elated #t'challa is a great character i am so excited
  • High-School Teachers: You need to be professional when you go to college. High-School dress-code reflect what COLLEGE classes expect you to wear.
  • Actual College Student: I know this class is at 5:00 pm, but I'm wearing pajama pants and a tank top.
  • Actual College Professor: lol same.
Jun 1, 2016 254,502 notes

strider-inquire:

strider-inquire:

ok but why is there such a stigma amongst straight guys on taking a girl wearing a suit to homecoming or prom? like have you seen a cute girl in a nice suit?

if you think a guy dating a girl is gay then boy do i have some news for you

Jun 1, 2016 204,816 notes

hyeronatrudons:

just-shower-thoughts:

In chess, the Queen is the hero and the King is the damsel in distress.

#this is how maes hughes would have started his best man speech 

All right, you know what, fuck right on off there, buddy.

Jun 1, 2016 24,016 notes
#fma #chess

dominawritesthings:

eatingcroutons:

eatingcroutons:

Oh my fucking god there are two men and two kids at a table on the other side of this beer garden, and one guy is telling the little girl shit like, “Your brain is probably wired linguistically, whereas mine is wired mathematically,” and the girl is saying in a quiet little voice that she got the highest maths score in her grade, and his response is to talk about how men have bigger brains than women and jesus fucking christ someone please tell me why I shouldn’t go over there and pour my beer all over this asshole’s head

I can’t figure out how to reply to replies on mobile but to summarise: I finished my pint and walked over and said to the girl, “Did I hear you say you wanted to be a scientist?” And told her that I’m a scientist, and maths was always my favourite subject when I was a kid, and wished her good luck, and told her the most important thing about science is to question everything. And she turned to the guy (her uncle?) and was like “Yeah, like I was questioning what you were saying before!”

I reckon she’ll be okay. 

True fucking example of how not all heroes wear capes. Bless you.

Jun 1, 2016 27,162 notes
feel free to unfollow if you:

sacrificethemtothesquid:

steinbecks:

  • don’t like me
  • liked me at one point, but don’t like me anymore
  • hate what i post
  • hate what i have to say about xyz topic
  • find me annoying
  • don’t have anything in common with me anymore, and are bored by the things i post
  • feel obligated by whatever personal reason you may have to keep following me, even if literally any of those above things apply

this applies to mutuals as well. your dash should be your happy place, so no hard feelings and i wish you the best in life

I’m adding here that I don’t actually check my followers list ever - I only ever check the number if I’ve had a rash of new follows - so if you’ve got any anxiety about offending me, don’t worry, because I literally won’t see. Your dash is your safe and happy spot, and if my content doesn’t jive with what you want to see…that’s fine with me.

And like…don’t feel compelled to tell me why you’re unfollowing.  (In fact it’s…pretty bizarre to have someone tell me why they’re unfollowing, especially since I’ve had at least a couple people unfollow me for shipping things I don’t like at all.)  By all means, feel free to just…stop, if that’s what would make you happiest.

Jun 1, 2016 241,909 notes
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