2. You may not test theories on each other. Not even the senior officers. Especially not the senior officers.
3. Do not feed any tribbles.
4. DO NOT FEED ANY TRIBBLES.
5. Tribbles are no longer allowed on the ship.
5a. Edit: Dr. McCoy and First Officer Spock may use a tribble when absolutely necessary under dire circumstances only.
5b. Update: No crew member may ever have a tribble on the ship under any circumstances ever.
6. The ship is not sentient. The captain may not marry the ship, even if it’s only a joke. Neither may Mr. Scott.
7. We take it back. The ship is sentient. Respect her at all times.
8. Any non-standard maintenance (READ: modifications) to the ship MUST be approved by Starfleet and properly documented.
9. Even if the Captain would pretend not to notice them. Or wholeheartedly supports them. Or is the one doing them.
9a. STOP MODIFYING THE DAMN SHIP, JIM.
10. Captain, Doctor McCoy is wise in his advice. I suggest you follow it before there are any…unfavorable consequences from the admirals in Starfleet Command.
10a. Spock, did you just threaten me?
10b. Negative, Captain. I merely wish to remind you of the upcoming ship inspections, as the last time Admiral Benett had to deal with the reports he was very adamant that our crew is no longer trusted to do our own quarterly inspections. Apparently too many of crew relationships are founded on “mutual propensities for non-strictly-regulation shenanigans.”
11. The illegal still in Engineering is—however appreciated—still illegal. No stills in Engineering, or anywhere else on the ship.
12. Alcohol from said still may not be sold for profit, especially outside of this crew. News of its existence cannot, under any circumstances, reach the admirals or their underlings. Or the engineering staff of other ships. Or the captains of other ships!
12a. NO ONE MAY SPEAK OF THE STILL DOWN IN ENGINEERING, EVEN TO OTHERS ON THIS SHIP.
13. The first rule of moonshine stills: You do not speak about the moonshine stills. Just shut up and drink the alcohol.
13a. With pleasure, sir!
14. Lieutenant Uhura would like to inform whoever modified and reprogrammed the universal translators that she looks forward to personally ripping out their vocal cords and using them to repair the damage she’s been forced to spend the last 34 hours fixing.
15. The captain would like to remind Lieutenant Uhura that insults said in other languages are still insults, and still unacceptable.
16. Lieutenant Uhura would like to remind the Captain that insults are acceptable when sufficiently deserved by certain farm hicks and that if they are not understood by the enemy party then there’s no harm done.
17. The Captain would like to remind Lieutenant Uhura that he is, contrary to what she may believe, a genius who does know more languages than he usually lets on, and no sentient being would appreciate being called a [expletive removed, by authority of Lieutenant Commander Spock] under any circumstances.
18. Lieutenant Commander Uhura would like to politely remind the Captain—
19. Lieutenant Commander Spock, with the authority of First Officer, hereby orders this conversation to be dropped immediately. It is unbecoming of senior officers, and frankly, quite childish. If the two parties wish to continue, they may do so on their own time in private quarters.
20. On a related note to yesterday’s spat, no one is allowed to place bets pitting senior officers against each other. Especially not the other senior officers.
21. Karaoke night is hereby banned forever from the Enterprise.
22. The Captain is not allowed to declare laser tag wars in the Jeffries tubes. Even if everyone involved enjoyed it.
23. Pig Latin is not an official language of the Federation, nor an acceptable method of communication when working on shift.
26. The shipwide broadcast system is not for playing favorite music while at warp in to “set the mood.”
27. Regulations are not “more like guidelines, anyway.”
28. “What the admiralty doesn’t know…” is not a phrase that should precede any statement on this ship.
28a. Somehow, every time it’s said, the admiralty inevitably does find out. Senior Command is investigating the possibility of a jinx on the phrase.
29. The Captain is not allowed to name any newly-discovered dinosaurs by himself. We cannot have seven separate species of Kirkosaurus.
30. The marriages that various crewmembers have been forced into via alien rituals on away missions are notvalid. If you wish to be officially bound, you can do so the normal, legal way.
32. Starfleet has officially-established drill proceedures. They do not include laser tag, paintball, Mafia, or capture the flag.
33. The Captain is no longer allowed to eat, drink, touch flirt with, or look at any unknown substances on away missions.
34. It is a punishable offense to evade routine medical evaluations.
34a. This includes you, Jim.
34b. Any and all crewmembers found to be assisting the Captain in hiding from Doctor McCoy are subject to official reprimand and the immediate restriction of all deserts from their meal card.
35. No member of the crew may walk within five feet of Lieutenant Sulu’s plants. Some of them can move, and some of them are extremely…territorial.
36. Starfleet is not responsible for the consequences if you decide to play tag in the Jeffries Tubes, nor will you receive any sympathy for injuries sustained while doing so.
36a. Except maybe for Chekov.
37. There is no such thing as being “allergic to paperwork,” especially since paperwork is entirely digital and no longer on actual paper.
38. The captain may not declare Casual Fridays.
39. The Captain may not declare a “Space Pirate Day.”
40. Officer Spock may not mislead crew members into believing that he is still ignorant of common human idioms and expressions of speech.
41. However illogical the captain is being, when logic fails to persuade him, it is still not acceptable to pick him up and physically move him.
42. FOR THE LAST TIME, JEFFRIES TUBES ARE NOT FOR PLAYING IN.
43. Shipwide games of Murder are not an accepted method of “team bonding.” No matter how much you try to argue that a common enemy brings people together, it won’t change the fact that organized serial murders—even fake ones—are not acceptable behavior on a starship.
You walk in through your front door and find that every OC you’ve ever created has somehow come to life and is now waiting for you in your living room. And they’ve got a few words to say to you…
Facing a room full of people I’ve tormented, tortured, corrupted, and killed.
the fact that NASA is so underfunded just fuckign it fucki ng it just f ucking blows my mind fuck. it’s NASA. it’s fucking NASA. we’re talking about space and science and our understanding of the universe. we’re talking the study and search for planets and life outside Earth and trying to ensure the survival of our species by sending humans to Mars and generally just trying to find the meaning of life and you don’t think that’s the tightest shit you’ve ever even considered then you’re wrong
THERE’S A GUY SCALING THE TRUMP TOWER IN NYC WITH GIANT SUCTION CUPS LIKE A MISSION IMPOSSIBLE STUNT AND IM LAUGHING
UPDATE: OKAY SO police are all over and they
sent a window washer platform down from the top of the building but it was too
far above him so then sent it back up and police just shattered a window
slightly above him to try to get him and now he’s moving away from the hole in
the window and continuing up he’s been climbing for like an hour now and they
cant figure out how to get him down this is so incredible
UPDATE: LOOK AT HIM GO
UPDATE: they just inflated a giant inflatable on 56th street a third of nyc is in gridlock bc of this guy climbing the trump tower i cannOT BELIEVE
UPDATE: he’s on the 18th floor this so surreal
UPDATE: we’re approaching hour 2 of the climb and since the last update he’s made it up at least another 3 floors
UPDATE: SOMEONE TOOK A PICTURE OF HIM FROM INSIDE THE TOWER
A HERO
update: apparently his name is steve and he’s from virginia
ASCEND, STEVE
UPDATE: they just used suction cups to pull two panes of glass into the building a few floors above him
you know what they always say. you cant fight fire with fire, but you should always fight suction cups with suction cups
UPDATE: HE’S TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM THEM STILL IM CRYING WHAT THE ENTIRE FUCK IS 2016????
…seriously, can some American please explain to me please?
Friendly reminder to check you’re not holding tension in your body. Let your shoulders drop, unclench your hands and jaw. Take a deep breath. Much better.
white women are always like “more strong kickass female leads!” and when i say i want to see a black female love interest who is allowed to be girly and fall in love they give me weird looks and say that i’m supporting gender stereotypes and heteronormativity but what a lot of white women don’t get is that black women we’ve had hundreds of years of having our femininity ripped from us, of being deemed unworthy of male (especially non-black male) attention. black women in media are never allowed to be the “cute” ones or the love interest, we’ve always been the “strong kickass street smart woman” trope that white women want so badly. so basically if a black girl says she wants to see another black girl fulfill the role of “love interest” there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that and it isn’t a hindrance to feminism
Here’s your very LOUD AND NOT SOFT REMINDER that it is not okay to repost my work (or anyone’s work) here or on other websites without crediting the author/artist!!!!! And it should go without saying, but plagiarism is also not okay!!!!! Taking the entire concept of a poem and changing a few words is plagiarism!!!!! Using entire lines from my work (or anyone’s work) in your own writing is plagiarism!!! Don’t pass off other people’s work as your own!! Not only is it not chill and frowned on heavily in all writing/artistic communities everywhere, it’s friggin illegal, my dude!!!!! It’s a copyright violation!! I’ll fight you!!! I’ll fucking fight you, pal Fists Up let’s party let’s fucking go
let’s fucking go to Google and use the reverse image search or the regular freakin SEARCH BAR and type that shit in if you don’t know the author and you’re not intentionally trying to be A Huge Asshole
if you’re not trying to pass it off as your own work and you’re just trying to add content to your blog or your twitter, you still have to provide a source for content that doesn’t belong to you!!!
ALSO when you see writing/content stolen from artists you know, call people out! remember that you don’t have to be mean about it because not everyone is intending to be malicious!!!!!! just pointing out stolen work to the original content creator is good but it’s just not always enough and it’s often REALLY emotionally exhausting to have to fight with people on the internet every day and file copyright infringement claims. when you point it out to me, it just ends up on a list of twenty other posts I’m trying to get credited for or taken down so I really appreciate when other people have my back on this stuff!!! support the creators you like and admire!!!!!!!!!!!! support creators in general!!!
I know it doesn’t seem like a big deal because people post uncredited quotes from movies and songs and stuff all the time!! but it’s really disheartening for new and emerging writers to have their work not attributed to them (aka stolen)!! also again, it’s not legal and I’ll fight you
I work in a decent sized, local, indie bookstore. It’s a great job 99% of the time and a lot of our customers are pretty neat people. Any who, middle of the day this little old lady comes up. She’s lovably kooky. She effuses how much she loves the store and how she wishes she could spend more time in it but her husband is waiting in the car (OH! I BETTER BUY HIM SOME CHOCOLATE!), she piles a bunch of art supplies on the counter and then stops and tells me how my bangs are beautiful and remind her of the ocean (“Wooooosh” she says, making a wave gesture with her hand)
Ok. I think to myself. Awesomely happy, weird little old ladies are my favorite kind of customer. They’re thrilled about everything and they’re comfortably bananas. I can have a good time with this one. So we chat and it’s nice.
Then this kid, who’s been up my counter a few times to gather his school textbooks, comes up in line behind her (we’re connected to a major university in the city so we have a lot of harried students pass through). She turns around to him and, out of nowhere, demands that he put his textbooks on the counter. He’s confused but she explains that she’s going to buy his textbooks.
He goes sheetrock white. He refuses and adamantly insists that she can’t do that. It’s like, $400 worth of textbooks. She, this tiny old woman, bodily takes them out of her hands, throws them on the counter and turns to me with a intense stare and tells me to put them on her bill. The kid at this point is practically in tears. He’s confused and shocked and grateful. Then she turns to him and says “you need chocolate.” She starts grabbing handfuls of chocolates and putting them in her pile.
He keeps asking her “why are you doing this?” She responds “Do you like Harry Potter?“ and throws a copy of the new Cursed Child on the pile too.
Finally she’s done and I ring her up for a crazy amount of money. She pays and asks me to please give the kid a few bags for his stuff. While I’m bagging up her merchandise the kid hugs her. We’re both telling her how amazing she is and what an awesome thing she’s done. She turns to both of us and says probably one of the most profound, unscripted things I’ve ever had someone say:
“It’s important to be kind. You can’t know all the times that you’ve hurt people in tiny, significant ways. It’s easy to be cruel without meaning to be. There’s nothing you can do about that. But you can choose to be kind. Be kind.”
The kid thanks her again and leaves. I tell her again how awesome she is. She’s staring out the door after him and says to me: “My son is a homeless meth addict. I don’t know what I did. I see that boy and I see the man my son could have been if someone had chosen to be kind to him at just the right time.”
I’ve bagged up all her stuff and at this point am super awkward and feel like I should say something but I don’t know what. Then she turns to me and says: I wish I could have bangs like that but my darn hair is just too curly.“ And leaves.
And that is the story of the best customer I’ve ever had. Be kind to somebody today.
Rey- who is the hero that everyone loves and they never can?
Here’s the one thing you need to remember about Rey: she grew up alone and starving, lonely and unloved, desperate for companionship, hungry for family. She remembers catching sight of her reflection at eight or so: a collection of bones and skin with scabs at the corner of her mouth and dust clogging her hair and bruises on her hands and split-open red knuckles from beating up a thief who tried to make off with her haul (no haul, no food; you die if you don’t eat. She knows this better than anything, she’s seen it happen, she knows what it is to starve
Anyway: this is a girl who never had a childhood and the instant she meets a child, an actual honest-to-Force child, with big dark eyes and soft skin and chubby cheeks (why does she want to pinch them? is this a normal reaction) she is overcome by a surge of feral, ferocious protectiveness. She wasn’t protected as a child, not ever, and now she’s damned if she’s ever going to let another little one end up with red knuckles and skin stretched hard over the angles of their ribs.
She says to Leia: I was hurt when I was little, left on my own, left – and the word abandoned stutters against her teeth. And I don’t ever want anyone to suffer like that, not ever and Leia thinks that once there was a boy who felt unloved and alone and drew the absolute opposite conclusion (I am suffering; thus, everyone else must also suffer)
And, eventually, she learns of the tragic tale of Anakin Skywalker, he who became Darth Vader, and she feels pity for him, for the Force is a cruel mother, and her favour comes with a steep price. And Rey knows what it is to feel the pulse of the universe in your bones. She knows what it is to be so full of power you choke on it, she knows how addictive it is to see injustice and think if I ruled this place, I would be better.
She knows, that’s the point. And she pities him, and she understands, and then she has a spare evening and plunges into the data-records of the Old Republic and she reads about the massacre at the temple.
Little ones. Lonely ones. Little ones stolen from their families and given weapons to hold instead of hands, asking Master Skywalker there are too many of them and little ones who didn’t expect to be protected, little ones ready to fight, and did they have bruises on their knuckles as well? Rey understands that training is imperative, that children who are strong with the Force need guidance, but –
They were children. In his care. He killed them.
That’s the story, the whole story, and nothing before or after can justify the single evening in the temple. Did he hold his wife after, did he touch her pregnant belly, did he tell his twins he loved them?
Luke tries to speak of redemption. Rey spits on the floor, because she’s an ill-bred desert girl who would die ten thousand deaths before lifting her lightsabre to an innocent. And good is not always nice, and she tells Luke to his face that his father was a monster and ever shall be. Little broken bodies, she says. Her eyes flare. The Force, around her, crackles with anger: the shining heat of the desert.
That night, Luke dreams of his father. I’m sorry, he says. Your granddaughter hates you – but Anakin Skywalker smiles.
Think about this for a moment. Think about how hard it must have been for him to say those words.
‘He’s not your son.’
Like no no no, Molly, this is my Harry. My kid. James and Lily’s son from his appearance right down to the way he writes the alphabet and protects his enemies. I’ve known the kid literally since he was born. I know what James and Lily wanted for him. They’d want him to know what he’s getting into. They’d want him to know that we trust him. And Lily would skin me alive if I let her son face the “chosen one” scenario without knowing what it means. James and Lily Potter gave their lives as a result of this Prophecy and you’re telling me they would want to keep him in the dark? He is my godson, Molly. I would do anything to keep him safe. I’m the one Harry wrote to nearly every day for months and I know what he needs. I know what happened in the damned graveyard. I know what Harry’s been through and I know what his parents would want us to do. HE’S. NOT. YOUR. SON.
‘He’s not your son,’ said Sirius quietly.
Sirius is canonically the sort of person who’d get increasingly louder and angrier over the course of an argument. But no. Molly wants Harry to be a child. Her child. And all he can think of is Lily. Her grit. Her principles. The way she’d have laid the truth out before Harry and then taken him out to a Quidditch game or something.
He never gets to say any of that. There’s Molly’s below-the-belt Azkaban taunt and Sirius just retreats into his guilt about not actually being there for Harry… not being able to protect him last year… not keeping James and Lily safe.
um hi feel free to tell me to take a hike but. i really like your blog and your writing and i may or may not have gone 480 pages back in it and seen "In which angels are a thing that happened around 1947 and just kind of never left; also everyone is LGBT because fuck you I do what I want" and now i'm really curious--would you be willing to elaborate?
BABE I will never tell you to take a hike about my original writing, I have real shit to get done and a bunch of older asks to answer, but I’m gonna do this instead, sorry. I have many novels started and that’s one of the ones that gets an actual place where I’ll find it to work on, I love it very much. Okay, so, *clears throat* let’s do this.
So. First off, some backstory: an insane percentage of my stories are rooted in an original conversation with someone, somewhere, that goes “But it’s so stupid that this book/TV show/movie did this, because it would be so much better if they’d done that” (see also: Falls the Shadow, product of a Supernatural rage quit, Emrys Ascendant, product of a Merlin rage quit, and Polaris, product of a “please God I just want a F/F couple that lives” tirade). This one was the product of a half-dozen episodes of Dominion in very short order (which I have yet to rage-quit, by the by, and love very much in its capacity as a ridiculous lovely garbage pile) and me turning to @twistedangelsays and going “But it would be so much better if there were two angelic factions openly, one that thought humanity was past redemption and one that believed that they were still duty-bound to love and protect us.” And then I did kind of this weird magician trick and pulled a fully-formed universe and plot with main characters and ships out of thin air.
Let’s talk about the battle in the Department of Mysteries for a sec. So after the group gets split up, Harry, Hermione and Neville go one way and Ron, Ginny and Luna the other. The next time we see the latter group Ginny’s ankle is busted and Ron’s brain is addled. Luna says that the Death Eaters blew up a planet in the planetarium and hit Ron with some sort of hex.
Let’s take a moment to examine that. If the curse that hit the planet had hit any of the kids, they’d be dead. So the Death Eater probably missed, hit the planet ahead of them, injuring Ginny. But here’s the important part: the one who actually gets hit by the hex? Ron.
Why is this important? Because Ron is consistently described throughout the series as tall. Like, every time Harry sees him after the beginning of summer he’s described as having shot up. Again. On the other hand Ginny is described as “the small one” by Bellatrix Lestrange. But Ron is behind her. I don’t know if you know this but tall people can run really fast. I am not particularly fit but I am tall. And I can pour on the speed when my adrenaline’s up, which I have no doubt was the case for everyone in the Department of Mysteries. But he’s behind her.
Because he did that deliberately. He kept his body between the Death Eaters and the girls. He shielded them from their spells. Because those he cares about are more important to him than his own life.
I don’t know, I just think about this a lot.
Ron is a strategist, and has already shown a willingness to take the hit for the team and be left behind. In any group, I think that’s just his default position; take the hit, buy more time for others to escape. He’s well aware that realistically, someone is going to be hurt. In this case, Luna is creative and smart enough to come up with something out of left field to throw the enemy off. Ginny is small, but she’s an athletic powerhouse who can throw strong hexes. If it comes down to a crunch, Ron knows that the two of them can fight their way out, and he can increase their odds by at least holding off the wave behind them.
Honestly, this is such an important point.
Consistently throughout the series, Ron can be seen being taken out of the action somehow. AND IT IS NEVER BECAUSE HE IS WEAK.
Rather, it’s because Ron is a STRATEGIST, who CARES.
In Philosopher’s Stone, for example. Ron allows himself to be “taken” by the queen, because he knows that he is standing with the Boy-Who-Lived and the Brightest-Witch-Of-Her-Age and Voldy must be stopped and it’s SIMPLE to him. Ron is a strategist, like has been said. It’s a strategic decision - who cares if it puts himself in harm’s way?
In Prisoner of Azkaban, Ron and Harry are faced with the Grim, and what does Ron do? He pushes Harry out of Sirius’ path, in the process allowing the dog to latch onto his outstretched arm and pull him away, breaking his leg as they enter the Willow. This decision is simple too - it’s because Harry Potter means the world to Ron Weasley, and Ron would not hesitate for a moment in putting himself between Harry and danger.
RON IS A STRATEGIST, AND RON CARES.
And when it comes down to it, he never hesitates.
And don’t forget DH:
“Wait,” said Bellatrix sharply. "All except… except for the Mudblood.“
Greyback gave a grunt of pleasure. “No!” shouted Ron. “You can have me, keep me!”
“Right,” said Ron, squaring his shoulders. “So you can’t go, that’s what he wants, what he’s expecting. You stay here and look after Hermione, and I’ll go and get it —”
Where do people who claim Ron is a coward who hides behind his friends get their bullshit from?
French Friend: well, the total cost of me going to Med school is about 406 a year -
American Friend: THOUSAND?
French Friend: Um, no. 406 Euro. It sounds a little high but it covers the cost of my textbooks, extra classes and most of my housing. How much is it for you?
It just kills me when writers create franchises where like 95% of the speaking roles are male, then get morally offended that all of the popular ships are gay. It’s like, what did they expect?
I feel this is something that does often get overlooked in slash shipping, especially in articles that try to ‘explain’ the phenomena. No matter the show, movie or book, people are going to ship. When everyone is a dude and the well written relationships are all dudes, of course we’re gonna go for romance among the dudes because we have no other options.
Totally.
A lot of analyses propose that the overwhelming predominance of male/male ships over female/female and female/male ships in fandom reflects an unhealthy fetishisation of male homosexuality and a deep-seated self-hatred on the part of women in fandom. While it’s true that many fandoms certainly have issues gender-wise, that sort of analysis willfully overlooks a rather more obvious culprit.
Suppose, for the sake of argument, that we have a hypothetical media franchise with twelve recurring speaking roles, nine of which are male and three of which are female.
(Note that this is actually a bit better than average representaton-wise - female representation in popular media franchises is typicaly well below the 25% contemplated here.)
Assuming that any character can be shipped with any other without regard for age, gender, social position or prior relationship - and for simplicity excluding cloning, time travel and other “selfcest”-enabling scenarios - this yields the following (non-polyamorous) possibilities:
Possible F/F ships: 3 Possible F/M ships: 27 Possible M/M ships: 36
TOTAL POSSIBLE SHIPS: 66
Thus, assuming - again, for the sake of simplicity - that every possible ship is about equally likely to appeal to any given fan, we’d reasonably expect about (36/66) = 55% of all shipping-related media to feature M/M pairings. No particular prejudice in favour of male characters and/or against female characters is necessary for us to get there.
The point is this: before we can conclude that representation in shipping is being skewed by fan prejudice, we have to ask how skewed it would be even in the absence of any particular prejudice on the part of the fans. Or, to put it another way, we have to ask ourselves: are we criticising women in fandom - and let’s be honest here, this type of criticism is almost exclusively directed at women - for creating a representation problem, or are we merely criticising them for failing to correct an existing one?
YES YES YES HOLY SHIT YES FUCKING THANK YOU!
Also food for thought: the obvious correction to a lack of non-male representation in a story is to add more non-males. Female Original Characters are often decried as self-insertion or Mary Sues, particular if romance or sex is a primary focus.
I really appreciate when tumblr commentary is of the quality I might see at an academic conference. No joke.
This doesn’t even account for the disparity in the amount of screen time/dialogue male characters to get in comparison to female characters, and how much time other characters spend talking about male characters even when they aren’t onscreen. This all leads to male characters ending up more fully developed, and more nuanced than female characters. The more an audience feels like they know a character, the more likely an audience is to care about a character. More network television writers are men. Male writers tend to understand men better than women, statistically speaking. Female characters are more likely to be written by men who don’t understand women vary well.
But it’s easier to blame the collateral damage than solve the root problem.
Yay, mathy arguments. :)
This is certainly one large factor in the amount of M/M slash out there, and the first reason that occurred to me when I first got into fandom (I don’t think it’s the sole reason, but I think it’s a bigger one than some people in the Why So Much Slash debate give our credit for). And nice point about adding female OCs.
In some of my shipping-related stats, I found that shows with more major female characters lead to more femslash (also more het). (e.g. femslash in female-heavy media; femslash deep dive) I’ve never actually tried to do an analysis to pin down how much of fandom’s M/M preference is explained by the predominance of male characters in the source media, but I’m periodically tempted to try to do so.
Okay but - imagine Bones calling Jaylah sweetheart.
He’d try to take it back instantly, because he still flinches whenever he remembers the one (and only) time he called Uhura that. And he doesn’t want to be condescending, not at all - he’s a southern gentleman, dammit, and these terms of endearment just slip out sometimes.
But Jaylah stops him mid-apology, and goes “explain to me this word, Leonard Bones.”
He does - and from then on, not only does she insist he calls her sweetheart - she calls him that as well.
just a quick note in case i have any gross terfs following me
any post i make about how much i love girls or how much respect i have for girls or anything at all to do with girls - it absolutely always includes trans girls. there’s no reason why it wouldn’t. i don’t want my posts on your disgusting blogs so if you see the word ‘girls’ and don’t assume trans girls fit into that term, please get the fuck away from me and the entire earth. thanks.
one of my fav parts of stb is when the beastie boys are saving the federation and it’s badass af but then the music chills just a lil bit while Yorktown receives the jamming frequency and then the part in the song where it goes WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!! hits and the entire Yorktown shield LIGHTS THE FUCK UP WITH EXPLODING BEE SHIPS AND IT’S LIKE SOME NEXT LEVEL FUCK YEAH SHIT👌💯👌✔ LIKE YES FUCK THEM UP YES!! !! ! !!!!!!!!!
I love the les mis fandom okay? I love it so much I’m younger than most people in it and I still feel welcomed and coming from more toxic fandoms this one feels like i can just breathe i love it so much
to people who want to bernie or bust: you do not protest with votes
there is no “BUT HILARY THIS” or “THEY CHEATED BERNIE THAT”
yes, its true, hilary is far from perfect and bernie got fucked so hard
but you do NOT. PROTEST. WITH. VOTES.
why??? i got one word for you
brexit
near half of the people who voted in favour of brexit did so out of protest of the EU and how heavy they were going on laws for each member country. yeah that protest vote didnt go too well did it
look, i know what corrupt voting systems feel like, i mean england has the first past the post system whose shittyness is explained right here
but listen to me right now, and listen very carefully. you do not protest with your vote. the republican party doesnt have this split, yes you have people who dont like trump but he has such a dominant lead that he doesnt have to deal with this: hes lucky for that reason. by splitting the vote you split the proportion.
look, heres what you should do
first, you vote for hilary if youre a democrat (i know youre already angry at what im saying, but hear me out)
secondly, once hilary is elected, you protest for the DNC to be held accountable for what they did to bernie and you dont shut up until shit changes
secondly, you protest against the electoral system. yes it might not change in hilary’s 4-8 years, but listen to me and listen to me right now as someone who missed out on the brexit vote by 6 months
do not protest with your vote, protest with your voice
do you ever think about your oc and you’re like “i headcanon that—” and then you stop and realize that this is YOUR character and all of your headcanons are canon and you are powerful and should be feared
I pull up at this nice ass house, I’m walking to the door as the woman pulls in her driveway so the pizza is definitely not late.
I’m all smiley and courteous and shit, she tipped me $1 on a $51 bill.
The next house I have is in a lower class neighborhood, she tips me $4.00 on a $14 bill.
rich people don’t value yr labor at all
This has ALWAYS been my experience in food service. Rich people tip like shit because they feel your job isn’t a ‘real’ job. They’re used to being serviced so they don’t appreciate hard labor. It’s so gross.
And poorer people always tip nice because…well the opposite reason.
Shout out to bi boys. You may not have a lot of positive posts for you out there but you are valid and you are good. Your bisexuality is not ‘a stepping stone to being fully gay’ you’re not a gay guy too scared to fully come out. Your bisexuality is just as real and valid as anyone else’s. You are important and you matter.
I feel like the Amis would try to get Enjolras and Grantaire together for ages but literally nothing seems to be working and the schemes get more and more elaborated and then one afternoon Gavroche goes over to where Courfeyrac is not even trying to talk to Enjolras anymore who is too busy staring at R laughing at something Joly said.
And Gavroche flops down onto a chair next to Enjolras and just goes, “You know what your problem is? You’re really just scared shitless.”
And Enjolras stares at him like ‘What did the tiny citizen just say to me?’
And Gavroche casually goes on like, “Y’know, it’s okay to be scared, it’s not a big deal –”
“I’m not scared.”
“Nah, it’s alright–”
“I’m not SCARED.”
“Really? Well, I think if triple dog dared you to go over there and kiss him right now you wouldn’t.”
And Enjolras is just like “YOU THINK? YOU THINK?! WELL I’M NOT GOING TO LET A GODDAMN TEN YEAR OLD TELL ME WHAT TO DO!” and stomps over to Grantaire and kisses him right in the middle of the Musain and when they break apart Grantaire is like, ‘What??’ and Enjolras just whispers ‘I’m not scared’ against his lips and continues kissing him.
Cue to smug Gavroche snatching the cup of hot chocolate from an absolutely shocked Courfeyrac, muttering “amateurs” under his breath.
“Hephaestus is really great. I mean, he only ever really does that one little thing of molesting his newly born sister, but other than that he’s cool.”
“Apollo’s just a sociopath, and a loser version of Zeus, really.”
“So either Helen falls in love with Paris, which she doesn’t want to do, or Aphrodite ships her off to Egypt to get a master’s degree in pharmacology.”
“Whenever Achilles had a problem, he’d just run home crying to his mom. His mom always had the same advice: stop fighting, eat, have sex with a woman. He only ever did the first thing, which is probably why he got killed.”
“Basically, Apollo got mad at a bunch of people for not having sex with him and they ended up worse off - mostly turned into plants, for some reason.”
“Cassandra turned Apollo down since she held a vow of chastity, but of course Apollo took it personally and cursed her.”
“You can always pick out Odysseus in pictures ‘cause he’s always wearing a stupid little hat.”
“The gods tend to have these conflicting powers or personality types. Ares, super feared by mortals and always bloody and angry, is basically the fool of the gods. Zeus, almighty king of the gods, is completely helpless when it comes to his libido.”
“So Brad Pitt spends nine years in the harem - you’ve all seen 300 right? I always picture Achilles as Brad Pitt now. Anyway, Brad Pitt’s in the harem, bored out of his mind for 9 years cause he’s already been trained for hero stuff at Charon’s hero academy…”
“So Orlando Bloom is just moping in his room while the Greeks are camping outside of Troy, and Hector finds him and is like, ‘Come on, Paris, this whole war is because of you!’”
“Have you all seen the Disney version of Hercules, where Hades is super evil and angry? Yeah, that’s not really right. Hades was more like the weird, basically harmless brother of Poseidon and Zeus.”
“I love this vase of the Underworld, it really shows the relationship between Hades and Persephone. I mean, Persephone’s standing there like ‘Whip that guy more! Punish him less! Stop slacking!” and Hades’ is just lounging on the chair like, “Darling, how about a roast for dinner?”
“The thing is, Oedipus tried really hard not to kill his father and marry his mother!”
birdartpoetry asked: Mister Gaiman, you’re kickass. I was just wondering, what do you think is the best way to seduce a writer? I figured your answer would be pretty spectacular.
In my experience, writers tend to be really good at the inside of their own heads and imaginary people, and a lot less good at the stuff going on outside, which means that quite often if you flirt with us we will completely fail to notice, leaving everybody involved slightly uncomfortable and more than slightly unlaid.
So I would suggest that any attempted seduction of a writer would probably go a great deal easier for all parties if you sent them a cheerful note saying “YOU ARE INVITED TO A SEDUCTION: Please come to dinner on Friday Night. Wear the kind of clothes you would like to be seduced in.”
And alcohol may help, too. Or kissing. Many writers figure out that they’re being seduced or flirted with if someone is actually kissing them.
…because this seems to have come around again, here is the original.
