Finals are killin me man, any way you can tell another story? You've been like my salvation this week.
hahahahaahahaha literally a year later!!! literally a year. never be my friend, i will forget to answer your emails and constantly double-book my time.
ANYWAY, someone else (@ TUMBLR: what if….you tried…..not being QUITE so bad at messaging??? just a thought!!!! just an idea to try.) asked me for another Boarding School Story™ and i was racking my brain trying to think of something, because contrary to what i feel like might be popular belief, i didn’t get up to too many hijinks in high school.
i mean i was in our version of detention a lot but that was for things like “skipping breakfast” and “being late always” and “writing an inflammatory speech about how unfair it was that we had to eat breakfast in the dining hall when we could be using that time to SLEEP” and “dyeing my hair with bright streaks against the express written rules of the student handbook”.
okay in hindsight i was actually….. in detention….. a lot.
they used to email our parents every time we were in detention and it got to the point where my mother emailed our dean of students and asked if, to save time, she was only emailed when i WASN’T in detention.
but i feel like i wasn’t a troublemaker???
like okay objectively i was…in trouble often but–
the POINT IS, my young and very gentle delinquency aside, the only time i was ever in like, real trouble is the time that my boyfriend and i got stuck on the roof of the boys’ locker room in the football stadium.
i guess the important background info here is that where was an hour every night between study hall and final dorm sign-in that students were allowed to leave their dorms and ~mingle with one another, though there were all kinds of rules about where you could and couldn’t be.
school was like “you have to be in a lighted area” and students were like “lmao.”
there was also a hilarious rule during co-ed visitation on the dorms that you had to have “your door open and everyone had to have at least one foot on the floor at all times” which is an adorable way to try and curtail the Teenage Get Down.
anyway, the boyf and i were looking for a cool fun place to hang out and talk about, god, i don’t know, whatever it was that we talked about.
a few things about this boyf:
we had a spanish class together and he was very tall.
he had a lot of other good qualities, including “he was so nice to me all the time even when i was horrible” and “excellent deadpan” but my initial interest was because he was SO. VERY. TALL.
a pretty good summary of our relationship as a whole was that he called me to be like, “hey, we’ve been….talking a lot…….i was wondering what you were trying to do with that” and i was like “uh———i wasn’t——i like—-UHHHHHHHHHHHH” and he was like, “WELL DO YOU WANT TO LIKE, GO OUT??” and i was like, “SURE BUT I HAVE TO GO NOW BYE”
ah, to be young.
so boyf and i went for a fun little adventure looking for some ~privacy and struck upon the BRILLIANT idea of scaling the locker room building and hanging out on the roof, because nothing says “romance” like “the smell of a football equipment”. so he managed to find a ladder somewhere and up we went. a lovely time was had by all until i looked down at my watch and realized i had five minutes to be back on dorm.
“oh, shit,” i said, and getting to my feet and jogging to the edge of the roof. i looked down.
“hey, boyf?”
“yeah?”
“where did you put the ladder?”
he looked up. “i left it where you’re standing.”
i looked again. #confirmed for no ladder.
“are you sure?”
“yeah, where else would i put it?”
“well, where did you get it?”
“i don’t know, i found it….on……the grass………”
A WORD OF ADVICE: don’t ever just assume that ladders left lying around are for public use!!! they are ALMOST NEVER for public use.
“is it possible that was someone’s ladder, and they came and took it?”
SPOILER ALERT: it was possible!!! in fact, it was probable!!!
SPOILER ALERT #2: it was, in fact, security’s ladder, and security had taken it, assuming, of course, that two idiot students hadn’t just taken their ladder and climbed onto a roof that they 120% were not supposed to be on at 10pm.
“well,” said boyf.
“well,” i said.
“i could jump down and then catch you,” he offered.
we looked at one another. we looked down at the ground. we looked back at each other.
“you’re not THAT tall,” i said.
so, our options:
jump off the roof.
call for help.
accept that we now lived on this roof forever, build a home out of what we could scavenge, and never face the consequences of our actions.
“so, do you want to just live here?” i asked. “we could be happy.”
“PLEASE HELP,” yelled boyf. “WE ARE STUCK ON THE ROOF.”
boyf was more willing to accept responsibility for his actions than i was, which is also why he was willing to try to be friends when we broke up and i hid in my dorm room for a solid 3 months until he graduated.
after a few minutes if our shouting, security and the coach of the football team–who must have just been on duty?? i don’t think they like, called him every time there was a football stadium-related incident.–gathered at the boys’ locker room and glared up at us in the dark.
“HOW did you even get UP THERE,” shouted mr football coach.
“there was a ladder!” boyf protested. “it was right there! it was a public ladder!”
“THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A PUBLIC LADDER.”
“i’m gonna jump down,” said boyf again.
you know, all these years later i’m still not sure if he was nobly trying to take the brunt of the scolding or just like…. really wanted to jump off the roof.
“please stop trying to jump off this roof!!!!!” i snapped.
after probably five minutes of incredibly awkward two-level scolding, in which we sat with our legs hanging off the edge of the roof and the football coach said things like, “WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS,” and “WHAT DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN” and “IT IS SO EASY TO BE ANY OTHER WAY THAN THIS” security arrived with “their” “ladder” that “wasn’t” for “public use” or whatever.
i don’t know if you’ve ever been scolded while literally looking down at the authority figure you’ve pissed off but like, it is incredibly weird.
like on the one hand you feel like you have all the power, because you’re like “LOOK AT THE TINY PEONS BELOW ME,” but also you know logically that you don’t have all the power and you have to at least look contrite because in 5 minutes you’ll be on the ground and then the authority figure will hold all the cards again.
also it just feels rude to have your shoes dangling above an authority figure’s head but like, what else are you supposed to do?? it’s weirder to stand???
standing feels aggressive when you’re on a roof looking down???
EMILY POST CAN YOU WEIGH IN HERE
boyf and the football coach walked me back to my dorm.
“uh, bye,” i said, feeling for some reason like i would never see boyf again and we were both going to prison.
“GOODNIGHT,” said the football coach. “YOU WILL BE HEARING FROM THE DEAN.”
*********
“you can see why it might seem….to outside parties…..like you were on the roof for……private reasons,” said the dean, scolding both boyf and i outside the chapel just to remind us that we had let not only ourselves down, but also probably jesus.
“WE WERE STARGAZING,” boyf and i said in tandem.
“but you can SEE why it might SEEM like you were doing something ELSE,” the dean said. “if it happens again i’ll call your parents.”
“if it happens again i’m totally jumping off the roof,” boyf whispered to me when the dean had turned away.
A request from @littlestartopaz: Polaris
AU set in the American Revolution?
AHAHAHAHA
YES. This turned into kind of an ode to
Ade North, the woman in command of Polaris, and I have no regrets.
So Polaris is a covert part of the colonial
army, stealing patriots out from under the noses of the redcoats. Ade North—North
for the star, North for the sky, North for freedom—is a grim-eyed escaped
slave, and she knows the risks of what she’s about to do, but she storms
straight into the base outside New York City.
The General—slave-owner, she
diagnoses immediately, at a glance—isn’t the first one she finds, but rather a
hot-tempered red-haired captain who grins at her when she tells him that I just walked through gunfire to get here,
boy, do you think I’m about to run because someone might try and hang me? He vouches for her, and some strings are
pulled, and…well. Her old master is a
Tory. She’s not afraid of taking advantage
of double-standards when they’re held out to her in both hands. And Ade North has never in her life backed
down.
I scrolled back as far as I could on the tag for “The Cask of Amontillado” and I still can’t find a single reason why everyone’s posting about it all of the sudden
Look a little bit further, in the very back
My friend, I must confess I still cannot see it in the dim light of the tumblr search function.
don’t worry it’s definitely back there look closer
so i get a lot of asks about lipstick, because i wear it a lot and talk about it a lot and tend to speak in declarative sentences. but since i usually end up saying basically the same thing, i figured i’d just put it all in one place.
first of all let me say: i fucking love lipstick. if i had been consulted at the beginning of the world, my top contribution would have been, “make sure society is real chill about everyone wearing lipstick who wants to, regardless of gender. make that a priority. right after that we can address why you felt the need to create cockroaches.”
here are just a few reasons why lipstick is the bomb-dot-com:
you can just change!!!! the whole color palette!!! of your face!!!
the second you put lipstick on, you are instantly the star of a music video. what’s your jam right now? turn that shit on. look at yourself in the mirror. you’re now in a hella artsy one-shot music video where it’s just you in the mirror looking FRESH. TO. DEATH.
remember when you were four-ish and your school or your parents or your one friend with all the nice shit brought out that 64-shade box of crayola crayons and your WHOLE BODY started vibrating because you were SO PUMPED about crayons?
lipstick is like that, except you get to put those crayons on your face.
don’t act like you didn’t want to rub those crayons all over your face when you were four.
don’t you lie to me. i’m your FIBS. we’re family.
anyway, the point is, wearing lipstick is the best. you should wear whatever color you want, whenever you want, but if you’re feeling ambivalent about it, here’s how i, personally, decide when to wear what.
TWO NOTES:
NOTE 1: just because this is how i do it does not mean it is the right or only way to do it. i’ll bet this is not how rosario dawson does it, and lbr, if we could all be more like rosario dawson and less like me, we would be.
NOTE 2: if you are of a gender that society likes 2 be a dickbag to about wearing lipstick, and someone is a dickbag to you about wearing lipstick, listen. i will spit in their mouths. okay? you look amazing. you look way better than those dickbags.
LIPSTICK: YOUR GUIDE TO PUTTING CRAYONS ALL OVER YOUR FACE.
REDS
there are two reasons to wear red lipstick. the first is that you want to be and feel so smokin hot that there is not a single person in the world who doesn’t look at you and go, “WHO THE FUCK IS THAT?”
the second is if you wake up and think to yourself, “i would like today to be that gif of obama kicking open a door. just the whole day. fuck you, doors.”
PINKS
pink is to red what a TV episode is to a whole season. pink is mr. darcy saying, “i love you, most ardently,” where red is that scene in brokeback mountain where they do it for the first time.
red hits you over the noggin. pink probably winks at you across the room from the party. you’re like, “WHAT DOES THAT WINK MEAN?”
pink shrugs. “idk,” says pink. “figure it out.”
pink probably runs an Aesthetic Blog.
you probably follow it, even though as a general rule you hate Aesthetic Blogs.
my point here is that pink can have a hundred thousand different uses and applications, dependent on the shade. nicki minaj wears lots of different pinks. do you feel like you want to be gently pushed on a swing in a meadow by your doting lover, who calls you my sweet? that’s a desperately light pink. do you want to make a point about femininity not being a synonym for weakness? that’s a probably magenta. maybe pastel, but aggressive neon. probably, but not necessarily, matte.
pink is complicated. so are you. embrace pink.
PURPLES
wear purple when you want someone riding a bicycle to crash into a flower stand because they are distracted by your striking beauty while you walk down the street. for this particular feeling, the darker the purple, the better. like the dark purple skin of a perfect plum. nothing says “bored luxury” like plum lipstick.
lighter purples are trickier. lighter purples are great for Nighttime Parties, particularly Nighttime Parties Where You’re Going Out To A Space Designed For Copious Public Drinking. i personally only wear neon purples in clubs–which is to say, i never wear neon purples–but i have a friend who wears them to brunch, and to be honest she brings the hotness of the whole group up an entire level. if you’re wearing neon purple, you are immediately the most important person at the table, so wear it on days when you want to wield that power for good, not evil.
MAROONS
maroon is a Business Lipstick. a Workplace Lipstick. maroon says, “i’m hot as shit, but i’m also incredibly competent.” maroon lipstick says, “i’m not here to talk shit about nancy at the water cooler, todd. i’m here to do my job, and do it better than both of you.”
maroon lipstick says, “yes, you should promote me.”
maroon lipstick says, “I’M AN ADULT. I MIGHT OWN A TOASTER THAT BURNS THE PITTSBURGH PENGUINS LOGO INTO MY BREAD, BUT I SWEAR TO GOD I AM AN ADULT.”
or, you know. whatever.
that’s just an example.
maroon lipstick also goes with pretty much everything. i always keep a tube of maroon lipstick in my purse in case of emergency.
NUDES
“nude” is a complicated question, because it covers such a wide range of skin tones. like, lupita nyong’o and i have wildly different ideas of what color makes our lips “nude.” so this section isn’t really about a color, but more of whatever-color-nude-is-YOUR-color-nude. it’s a category, not a shade.
nudes are good for a lot of occasions. nudes are good for looking like a Hot Young Parent Whose Partner Took The Kids For The Day. nudes are good for “I Just Woke Up Like This.” nudes are good for Sunday Meal With Your Parents. nudes are good for that scene at climax of a romance movie where for some reason you, as the protagonist, are standing in the rain, and you are crying because you’re in love with somebody but something with a capital S has come between you. they’re also good for a montage about you getting shit done in your life, like cleaning your apartment or studying for an exam or packing to leave for a long trip abroad.
i recommend gentle music when you’re wearing nudes. really poetic, emotional shit. joni mitchell. the avett brothers. tracy chapman.
you know what? scratch that. just put on “fast car.” listen to “fast car” on repeat the whole time you’re wearing nudes.
ORANGES
look, i’ll be honest. i don’t know. i don’t trust orange. i’ve seen people look beautiful in orange lipstick but it makes me think they’re hiding something.
are you hiding something? wear orange.
BLUES/GREENS/ANYTHING “WILDLY OUTSIDE THE REALM OF HUMAN FACE COLORS”
there is no right time to wear these colors. there is also no wrong time.* a few examples:
it’s the weekend.
you just got back from “woofstock,” a dog festival.
you genuinely love dubstep (for some reason).
you genuinely love the new ryn weaver album (for obvious reasons).
fucking todd at work brought in VEGETABLES WITH HUMMUS instead of a cake for his birthday. i mean, it’s your birthday, todd, but like, VEGETABLES WITH HUMMUS???? for your BIRTHDAY??? god, who even raised you.
*a small correction: maybe don’t wear these at funerals. i’d stick with neutrals or maroons at funerals.
A BRIEF ADDITIONAL NOTE
when it comes to applying lipstick in public (rather than, idk, excusing yourself to the bathroom or whatever), i’m of two minds. on the one hand, it pleases me to imagine that people just think that my mouth is always this color, even when there is no conceivable blend of genetics that could render me with a sparkly purple mouth.
on the other hand, like, fuck it, you know? whenever i catch someone watching me apply lipstick in public i kind of feel like that part in the “feeling myself” music video where beyoncé is wearing a chicago bulls one-piece and goes, “i stop the world! world, stop.”
no matter how bad it looks for trump right now, you must go out and vote for hillary clinton and the democrats on election day. you must go and vote. people die for the right to vote - use yours. do not get complacent.
but during the battle of Yorktown, Ben crouching under a table, holding Demora, and saying "don't worry, your dad is going to come and save us." and when the ship shows up, he points at it outside the window, "look, I told you, he's the one bringing it right for us."
But can you imagine the fear in Ben, he wants Demora to believe that Hikaru is coming for them, but he himself is quietly sure that Hikaru is dead or abandoned because there’s no way Yorktown would be under attack if Hikaru’s Kirk had anything to do with it.
And can you imagine the joy and relief and utter love when he saw the incomprehensibly out of date Federation ship flying on past, practically waving at him to let him know Hikaru is on board. He’s never been so sure of anything, and he feels Demora relax in his arms when he point up at him. She can spot the difference too.
household memes. memes that only make sense to the people you live with.
for example, in my house: saying ‘ew’ in a monotone voice, slapping your leg and saying “iiiiiii know it!” and the other person replies “well that’s just it.”
reblog with your household memes in the comments or tags
there’s no such thing as a stupid reason not to kill yourself.
your school sells cookies on thursdays? your favorite band is coming out with a new album? you’re still saving up for that tattoo? there’s still five sodas in your fridge and it’d be a shame to let them go to waste? you want to see the season finale of that show you love? keep living.
your reasons don’t have to be big, if they mean anything to you then they’re good reasons.
Yes! Just make something to look forward to
Okay but this is honestly true.
One of the closest times I came to committing suicide was when I was home alone for the weekend a few years ago. The reason I didn’t?
No one else was there to feed the cat until Monday.
That’s it. That’s all that saved me.
See, this is such good advice, because it can put you in the frame of mind that you need to be in to combat depression. Even things that seem little, like, “My plant will die if I don’t water it,” or “I’m the only one that takes out the trash, anyways” are examples of how you’re needed and valuable, even appreciated.
There are people out there that need you and love you. Stay alive friend, because it is so worth it.
what she means:
Aaron Tveit and George Blagden both read passages of the brick to enrich their interpretations in Les Misérables, and where George Blagden noticed Grantaire's adoration for Enjolras, Aaron Tveit mainly picked up on Enjolras' charisma, fervor and faith in the rebellion. That's very flavour of meta and i don't know how to deal with it please send help
I know the idea about Obi-Wan being called Sith Killer (or Sith Slayer, perhaps?) has been done before but what about this:
After Naboo, Obi-Wan becomes known as the Sith Killer in the Order. It makes him uncomfortable but he can’t get people to stop calling him that; even before he had killed Maul, he had already defeated two Darksiders (Xanatos and Bruck) so after this, his status as that really cool, badass Jedi to emulate just skyrockets, especially among the newly Knighted and all the Padawans and Initiates. It’s also pretty clear from the fire in his eyes that he is deadset on finding the other Sith. Other young Knights are eager to help - it starts with his friends Bant, Garen, and Reeft: Whenever they’re on a mission, they also look for clues about Dark Side activity; sometimes they’ll follow up on those leads after their official Council-assigned mission ends and then hand that information to Obi-Wan, who’s compiling them. More and more Knights and even young Masters start doing that. Soon, Obi-Wan unofficially is the head of the Sith Hunting Task Force.
Anyway, so Anakin becomes known as the Padawan of the Sith Killer, not the Chosen One (how many Jedi even knew that Qui-Gon thought he was the Chosen One? He only told the Council about it, after all, not made a general Temple-wide announcement). The Jedi are a little flummoxed at first about Obi-Wan taking on a non-Temple raised Padawan but then they’re like, okay, well, this is the Sith Killer. If he wants to do things differently, who are we to tell him no? It’s not like any of us have encountered, fought, or defeated a Sith. And maybe that’s even the better way to do things??? Bringing on people who have life experience outside the Order so they can bring new ideas in?
Every time Anakin does things that they don’t expect, or show more emotion and passion than they’re taught to allow, they’re just like….well, he is the Sith Killer’s Padawan. Obviously the Sith Killer is teaching him differently. Maybe this is how Obi-Wan was able to kill a Sith himself???
(Some enterprising Padawan managed to get their hands on the footage of the fight from Naboo and they all watched it. Obi-Wan was obviously feeling a lot of anger and fear during his fight, and then he calmed himself at the end and managed to defeat his opponent. So Emotions, then peace becomes the new motto for this generation of apprentices.)
Everyone starts trying to befriend Anakin. All the other Padawans start trying to be more like him. He’s passionately speaking out about slavery? Well, they will too then. Obviously, slavery is an evil that will lead people to Fall. It should be stopped. He talks openly about his attachment to his mother? Well, attachment must be okay then. (And they remember from that video that Obi-Wan was obviously very attached to Qui-Gon so there’s another point in favor of attachments.)
Some overly enthusiastic Padawan also hacks into the Temple records and finds out about Obi-Wan’s fights with Bruck as an Initiate. And everyone’s like, even then, he must have somehow known that Bruck was going to Fall. So people all try to avoid getting into fights with Anakin cuz like, if they do, does that mean that they’re going to Fall? Anakin’s the Sith Killer’s Padawan, after all. There must be something special about him. What if he too can tell when someone’s gonna Fall and that’s why he’s fighting with them?
So that’s how Obi-Wan and Anakin inadvertently change the Order. The Council starts noticing that something’s changing but they can’t manage to stop it or reverse it. The younger Knights, Padawans, and Initiates have stopped thinking of them as the all-knowing wise senior members of the Order and started seeing them as the old guard clinging to outdated traditions - none of them have ever fought a Sith or seen one in person, after all. Few of them even go on missions anymore. They just sit in their tower handing out assignments and reprimanding Jedi for not following their Code.
“i need you to be straight with me” / [muffled laughter]
“i love you” / shiro: WHAT / “sorry i was talking to ur biceps lol”
the rest of the paladins forming a Leave Shiro Alone squad (complete with pidge making loud siren noises & a stop-sign that keith procures out of nowhere)
[shiro getting singled out by the galra] LEAVE SHIRO ALONE
[shiro gettin’ his ass beat] LEAVE SHIRO ALONE
[shiro being self-deprecating] LEAVE SHIRO ALONE
“does this make me look smexy?” / “what does the m stand for” / pidge, from across the castle: SLOPE
lance: [talking to the back of keith’s hair like it’s a person]
“dtf means down to fight right?” / “………….keep him safe”
“WHY ARE U TEXTIN G MY LION FROM UR LION WE HAVE A COMMS UNIT”
[2 people standing in the same room] / (yelling): SAVE ROOM FOR JESUS
lance: [opens his mouth] / pidge: wow i just got a really bad migraine
“shiro why is ur eyeliner so perfect” / “it’s bc i’m a raging homosexual” / “yeah that sounds- wait what”
[hunk using his bayard to summon that huge-ass voltron gun] / pidge, screaming: PULL THE TRIGGER PIGLET!!!!!!
[someone fucks up] “OH MY FUCKING GOD THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS”
[halfway through battle] / [points at alien] / “need me a freak like that”
hunk is the only one who’s safe from the memes. it’s bc he’s too good and loving and kind. he can’t be touched. he’s unmemeable.
shiro: “please stop playing the history of japan video okay im jAPANESE I KNOW-” / “-HOW BOUTI DO IT ANYWAY”
constantly quoting hamilton songs
“i demand you to tell me where you’re from” / “…unimportant there’s a million things i haven’t done”
“pidge…don’t you think those are enough bombs for the-” / “I WILL NEVER BE SATISFIED”
[abandoned settlement] / “…..it’s quiet uptown”
[allura walks in] / “HERE comes the GENERAL”
allura having the body temperature of an ice cube and exploiting it on a daily basis
“big eraser for big mistakes” / “give it here” / “why?” / “i’m gonna use it to get rid of lance”
[grand entrance into enemy base] / “squad”
pidge/shiro/keith tying up their bangs when training
purposely talking about Earth Things in front of coran so he’ll ask about them
coran: what’s a “lap dance”? / “shiro can show u” / shiro: WHAT
coran: how do you “drop the bass”?
coran: what is whipping? isn’t it painful?
(lmao he’s like an old grandma, bless him)
[gets stabbed] “yikes”
alternatively: [gets stabbed] “can i keep this?”
keith is disproportionately good at making noodles and it really bothers everybody
[forms cheerleader pyramid] / pidge, while climbing over everybody’s asses: u know when i said this would be a fun team bonding exercise, i didn’t mean it literally
[keith struggling to get his helmet off] / “free him”
[lion malfunctions] / “get up bitch ur fine”
shiro starts using the clapping meme to give orders. but like,..,, with actual clapping (via @spaceshiro)
lance: [rickrolls someone] / “tHIS IS A VERBAL CONVERSATION”
the valor/mystic/instinct discourse
[alien makes eye contact with shiro] / lance: [sings “every time we touch” by cascada]
HA, oh, baby, I’m an asshole. I’m confident that more people hate me than like me. My high school teachers were trying to get me expelled, I used to get into fistfights, I shout people down when they start talking about how well, black people are an evolutionary step down or well, homosexuality is illegal because Leviticus or well, Muslims are dangerous. If I had a dollar for everyone who called me a bitch or told me they hated me, I’d not be on a scholarship, I’ll tell you that much.
49: Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
Two years ago? Yeah, not unlike. College, Adler, the occasional medical catastrophe, writing novels. Same old, same old. Four years ago, on the other hand, not even slightly.
56: Do you think you like someone?
I dunno, I’m one of those people where I need to have someone sit me down and go “you’re aware that you’re into that person” before I realize. I had a terrible crush on this STUNNING girl from Kenya at my summer program, and I just saw a guy tonight who was…goddamn. Just. One hell of a jawline, with the whole rumpled slightly-smudged-with-grease mechanic’s vibe. But I also go to a VERY small school when I’m not on break, so not a lot of…variety, you know?
71: Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?
BUT THEYRE NOT EVEN REALLY HAIRY THEY JUST have like soft spiky things
and PEACHES you keep adding to this list of perfectly palatable foods peaches taste perfect with cream
Peaches have FUZZ and that is just…no. I can appreciate that peaches even taste pretty good, I can admit that, I just CAN’T DO FUZZY FRUIT. AND RAMBUTANS ARE SCARY, I STAND BY THIS.
Prompt-based fandom events are when you really learn everyone’s colors like you’ll find the people who take the prompt “death” and come up with some smarmy ship-art of character A and character B walking over dead leaves while wearing scarves and drinking hot cider and then you’ll find the people who take the prompt “sunshine” and write how a bright glint of sunshine reflected off the barrel of a gun is the absolute last thing character A sees before taking a bullet to the chest
you can lead a content creator to water but you sure as fuck can’t make him drink
i think the narrative should explore the fact that clary is valentine’s daughter.
by which i mean - clary is dangerously charismatic. even alec, who hated her and has been forced to pick up after her, becomes close to her in the end. clary has stomped on every tradition and rule he was raised with, endangered countless lives - but still in the end he forgives, thanks her for saving isabelle’s life when she’s the one who endangered it.
maybe it is jocelyn’s daughter that saves the little mage child. but it is valentines daughter that went marching to magnus’s in the first place. jocelyn went to magnus when she was ready to hide - clary went to him when she was ready to fight. and when she brings the vampires and werewolves together - that type of leadership and manipulation is valentine. jocelyn helped save the downworlders by running from valentine and stealing the cup - clary doesn’t run. from the beginning she doesn’t run.
she fights, but not alone. she draws people to her, like moths to a flame. even meliorn is impressed by her, grants her a favor he’s granted no other. she negotiates with vampires, with simon’s help yes, but on her own.
and speaking of simon - valentine turned his best friend into a werewolf, and clary turned hers into a vampire. granted he was trying to kill luke and clary was trying to save simon, but still. jocelyn left luke wounded in a barn to make his choice, but clary made simon’s choice for him.
valentine and clary act - jocelyn only ever reacts. jocelyn may be a fighter, but she’s not a leader. she’s a soldier. luke is a soldier. but valentine and clary are smart enough and charming enough and ruthless enough to be generals. clary is always convinced she’s doing the right thing - even when lives are in danger and people are getting hurt she thinks she’s making the best choice for everyone. and she can usually convince most of everyone that she’s right. this is dangerous.
she’s not the same kind of leader that valentine is now. valentine is hard and violent and makes you walk over coals for his approval. but once upon a time he did what clary did - was kind and charismatic and told people that he knew what was right, that by listening to him they would be saving the world. clary has been in this world a couple of months and already she draws her inner circle around her, already she has allies that no one else has ever had before.
people are right to be wary of clary for being valentine’s daughter, but not for the reasons they think. clary will die before she joins her father, but she has the potential to succeed where her father failed. clary doesn’t like the clave, doesn’t agree with the clave, and she is valentine’s daughter more than she is jocelyns. those who knew valentine must see all his best and most terrifying qualities shining out in her. she may succeed where her father failed, and if she decides the clave is doing more harm than good - what’s to stop her in leading her allies in tearing it to the ground?
she is joan of arc, she is julias caesar. people believe in her, are willing to fight and die with their worst enemies for her, break oaths to their queen for her.
the only way to get rid of people like her is to stab her 52 times in the senate or burn her in a holy fire. but then she becomes a martyr and then shes more dangerous dead than alive.
there is someone in the clave who’s seeing clary and is seething, panicking, because this little girl is her father’s daughter, and she has the potential to amass an army that will destroy them all.
clary is valentine’s daughter.
her enemies should fear her - including valentine himself.
God BLESS, this was the series I wanted to read and God willing it’s gonna be the show I get to watch.
What they don’t tell you:
Self care sometimes isn’t fun. It’s going to class even when you want to stay in bed and rest. It’s paying bills on time and running errands even when every strand of your being cant stand it. It’s going to therapy and taking your medicine even when you don’t want to. It’s using coping skills even when going back to self destructive ones seems more appealing.
Recovering sucks. It’s hard. But you have to believe in the light at the end of the tunnel. And even on those days you don’t, you fake it till you make it.
Recovery is still worth it.
Sometimes self-care is taking care of future-me. Because she deserves to have someone looking out for her.
CONSTANTLY. I hate silence, I desperately hate silence, if there isn’t music playing then I’m probably humming, or singing, or talking, or muttering.
17: When was the last time you cried?
Let’s see…about a month ago. It had been a long day and I’d had a long shift and a creepy dude sat outside my workplace for over two hours staring inside at me and the two girls working with me until we had to call the cops, I have a long and nasty history with creepy dudes who think they have rights to stuff they do not at all have rights to, and that night after I’d managed to get to bed and come down off the adrenaline I cried. For me it was bursting into hysterical sobs, but for anyone else I think it would have looked like…mildly distressed sniffling. When I cry, it tends to be extremely quiet with very little in the tears department. My roommate says I cry like a movie star and that it’s not fair and honestly I don’t know what either of those things mean.
44: What’s the best part about school?
Having stuff to DO, Jesus Christ, I hate sitting around. Also I shamelessly enjoy feeling like I’m smarter than other people, largely because it’s very rare that I feel like I’m better at anything than anyone, so that’s nice too. (Insert that one part of Non-Stop here)
96: Don’t lie to me, was the last person you texted attractive?
Uh…the last person I texted, like proper texting, was my mom, soooo? I mean, yes, my mom is beautiful. But yeah. And the last person I texted for a more generous definition of texting was @twistedangelsays and while she is both STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL and TOTALLY BRILLIANT, not to mention being my very favorite conductor of light, I am not now and nor have I ever been into her. Our mutual lack of interest in dating each other is a great complaint of ours, our lives would be MUCH easier if we could just fall in love/lust and get married and never have to deal with dating anymore.
the worst part about being bilingual is being only like… moderately bilingual. like you can make conversation but you can’t like read articles and shit. or if you can understand but not respond. or if you only know enough to look impressive to a monolingual person, but you’re just pathetic to people who are native speakers lolol
BOTH RAMBUTANS AND AVOCADOES ARE BRILLIANT FRUITS AND THEY DONT DESERVE YOUR HATRED
i just to eat some avocado out of PURE SPITE
Okay, I G E T that avocados are some kind of a superfood and I just…like…canNOT get past how mushy they are, if you can more power to you. BUT RAMBUTANS HAVE HAIR??? I CANNOT. I DO NOT DO HAIRY FRUITS. LIKE. I DON’T EVEN LIKE PEACHES. EVEN ONCE THEY’VE BEEN PEELED. FRUIT SHOULD NOT HAVE HAIR, HAIR SHOULD BE AN ANIMAL-EXCLUSIVE OCCURRENCE.
my favorite thing about the cask of amontillado meme (which I LOVE) is that it displays, yet again, how difficult millennials on the internet are to predict. oh, giant company, you want your advertisement to go viral? well this week the kids are obsessed with a short story written in 1846 good fucking luck
oh my dear marketing man,you want me to explain how to track this? well, I could show you a chart that indicates the next five big memes. it is down in my basement, though it is quite cold, and surely you have another engagement to attend.
So in my research for my thesis, I learned a thing, and it’s not useful for my thesis so I’m posting it here instead.
Okay, so, everyone knows that the words canon and cannon are not synonyms, and if you’re like me it kind of makes your teeth grind when people talk about firing the canons or historical cannon. BUT HERE’S THE THING. The word canon is a direct lift from Latin, and it means law or rule. And so when heavy metal guns were developed and needed to be called something other than ‘that big murder machine over there’, the word cannon developed directly out of canon in the sense of “to lay down the law,” the same way Samuel Colt’s gun got called the Peacemaker. Likewise, ordnance comes directly from the Latin ordinance, which also got transferred directly into English as another synonym for ‘rule.’
And that is your totally useless historical fun fact of the day.
Hmmm, do we have a source for this? Because according to Etymonline, cannon is related to cane, roughly means “tube”, and goes back to Latin canna (reed).
Etymology is a vast and complex field, and it’s of course possible that Etymonline is only reporting one of several purported derivations, but he’s usually really good at listing various theories and I’ve never heard this one before soo….
(similarly, ordinance as in weaponry seems to come from the notion of organising it in an armoury)
Yes I do, but the page presenting the theories (although well-cited and reputable to the best of my research, and as this thesis is what’s going to dictate whether I get a BA I’m being rather choosy) is about three hours of reading. It’s about halfway through, and if you want to Ctrl-F it you can just search ‘Peacemaker’. I suppose a better way to phrase it would be that, yeah, cannon is related to canna for ‘reed’ but was introduced with significantly strong associations to bind it to the word canon on an implicit level. This is, generally speaking, why I don’t write posts while distracted late at night–ADHD doesn’t play well with those things if I’m trying to be coherent and weird connections start to appear. And now that it’s a respectable hour I’m kind of wondering how I even managed grammatical sentences.
I have bipolar mood disorder and I get worried that I’m too reliant on my medication especially if the dosage goes up
Then I realized
NEUROTYPICAL PEOPLE ARE JUST AS RELIANT on the neurochemicals in my medication, it’s just that their bodies produce it and mine doesn’t, it’s not that I’m a bad person and idk this realization seems to have really helped me understand and not feel so bad about it?
