Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

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April 2016

NASA has trialled an engine that would take us to Mars in 10 weekssciencealert.com

cantabilechaos:

panbelacqua:

amy-reblogs:

annlarimer:

wilwheaton:

thinkingingallifreyan:

honeywaspkittenbaby:

mindblowingscience:

NASA scientists have reported that they’ve successfully tested an engine called the electromagnetic propulsion drive, or the EM Drive, in a vacuum that replicates space. The EM Drive experimental system could take humans to Mars in just 70 days without the need for rocket fuel, and it’s no exaggeration to say that this could change everything.

But before we get too excited (who are we kidding, we’re already freaking out), it’s important to note that these results haven’t been replicated or verified by peer review, so there’s a chance there’s been some kind of error. But so far, despite a thorough attempt to poke holes in the results, the engine seems to hold up.

Continue Reading.

Well, I for one am getting my hopes up.

Warp factor SCHWING.

“Be waiting out front of the HAB, Watney, we’re not fucking waiting for you to get dressed. Places to be.”

Guys. Guys. I’ve been following this story for a while now and you don’t get it. Some guy made this and was like “well hi I made a thing and it shouldn’t go but it goes.”

And the science community was like okay that… there’s no way that works.

Then they tested it theoretically and it worked.

Then NASA was like okay but technically this breaks one of Newton’s laws so even if it theoretically goes it won’t like, actually go. So they built it and tested it more and it works.

So what we have now is the scientific community slowly cautiously freaking out because this GODDAMN EM DRIVE breaks the RULES OF PHYSICS but every time we test it, it FUCKING WORKS.

How cool is this????

Every time we’ve found something “broken” that functions, it means something is wrong with our understanding of reality. The next step is to figure out what, figure out what’s true, and open up a plethora of new scientific discoveries.

I’m so fucking PUMPED for SCIENCE

Apr 18, 2016 115,790 notes
#THIS REMAINS ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS #CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT PHONE CALL #'GUYS WE BROKE THE LAWS OF PHYSICS' #'WHAT DID YOU DO TODAY' #I FUCKING LOVE THIS #FUCK YES #SCIENCE BITCH #science! #star trek #LET'S BOLDLY GO MOTHERFUCKERS #I'M EXCITED #spaaaace
“So people say, what is there to be positive about? What is there to hope for? And my answer is always the same—Voyager. The two spacecraft we threw out into space with the hope of a planet behind them. One of them carrying a letter that said, “We are attempting to survive our time so we may live into yours”. The most hopeful letter any human being ever wrote. Our thoughts, our languages, our music all travelling now through interstellar space. The odds of either Voyager being intercepted within our lifetimes are infinitesimal, but that’s not the point. The point is that one day, so many days into the future we can’t even comprehend the number, some bored lifeform might scoop up a dead, battered piece of junk and find a planet’s hope inside. And if, against all odds, they can understand it, they might just train their sights on our backwater of space and find the place we once occupied and think, Damn. We missed a trick there. So here we are, going about our lives, and all the while the Voyagers are out there, hurtling onward. Every day you wake up they’re just a little bit closer to something amazing. And that’s what makes me smile every time I think of it. Voyager, and the journey never-ending.”—Voyager, Elisabeth Hewer (via elisabethhewer)
Apr 18, 2016 3,104 notes
#spaaaace #voyager #the space probe not the star trek series
Apr 18, 2016 347 notes
#i like it #leverage #oh lord give me health and strength #i'll steal the rest

ssardonyx:

general rule of thumb: history was gayer than you have been led to believe

Apr 18, 2016 154,660 notes
Play
Apr 18, 2016 322,428 notes
#i'm dying
Apr 18, 2016 2,031 notes
#claire is everything i aspire to be in life #claire temple #claire #claire is my everything you don't even understand #daredevil: a mess of saints and martyrs
To my fellow ADD/ADHD people!

littlestartopaz:

Do you have one thing your brain is always doing in the background?  For example, constantly playing music or pondering random things (which lets you think about two things at once).  This thing can also be particularly distracting or hard to think through when you’re having bad ADD/ADHD days.

I’m curious because a couple of people I’ve talked to have also said they have a “mental white noise” like listed above, and I would like to know how common it is among people with ADD/ADHD.  So if you could reblog, tag, or reply with your “mental white noise” and if you just have ADD or also have ADHD that would be awesome.  Or just reblog for signal boost would be cool too.

And a question mark for asks?

Apr 18, 2016 3 notes

bravedad:

i wonder how many people im in the “id be down if you asked” zone with

Apr 18, 2016 1,039,040 notes
ayyy after your brilliant Purim story could you do one for Passover, since that's coming up, if you haven't already?

okay CAVEAT: i have, at times in my life, been a serious* student of ancient egypt and so while i am comfortable historically telling Mostly Untrue stories about ahasuerus (xerxes) and Mostly True stories about the maccabean revolt it is, technically, my duty as a historian to tell u all that Nothing In The Passover Story Actually Happened, There Are Literally No Historical Sources For Ancient Israelites Migrating To Or From Ancient Egypt At Any Point, This Didn’t Happen

*i have never been a serious anything

unfortunately for history, u know how historical accuracy in storytelling is just like hanukkah foods?

(no, how is historical accuracy in storytelling like hanukkah foods)

I Donut Care About It. okay so like

way back in the waybackwhen there’s this dude joseph, and due to a large number of improbable circumstances involving fashion choices, a huge pit, and some well-timed freud-style therapy, joseph becomes bros with the pharaoh of egypt. on account of this joseph’s entire family moves to egypt; on account of this all of their friends move to egypt; on account of this all the jews start living in egypt, because as u may know, we all know each other.

eventually joseph dies, and also joseph’s bro the pharaoh dies, and also a couple more pharaohs die after that, and finally the pharaoh is like WAITAMINUTE WE GOT A SHIT TON OF JEWS LIVING IN EGYPT. WHY AND HOW DID THIS HAPPEN

and decides the best solution to this problem is to make all the jews slaves, because of reasons

but unforch jews keep having babies, because… jews… so the pharaoh is all like U KNOW WHAT WE’RE GONNA DO? WE’RE GONNA TAKE EVERY JEWISH BOY BORN… AND WE’RE GONNA KILL HIM. THIS WILL HAVE NO REPERCUSSIONS WHATSOEVER.

you may ask to yourself, “hey, don’t the jews have, like, a god? where is god in all this?” u would be right in asking this, because the jews are also asking this question. where is god?? why is he not fucking shit up?? wasn’t there, like, a covenant or some shit?

and the answer is, after a couple hundred years god is like Huh Whatsit Whazza Huh Oh Shit Yeah Jews. Fuck. Yes. Jews. I Have Those Now. because this is what happens when u make deals with infinitely old and infinitely powerful spirits whose hobbies include “gardening” and “whining about gardening”.

so god looks around and there’s this lady, yocheved, who’s birthin’ a baby; and there’s a couple of midwives called shifra and puah who are like WOW THAT’S A BABY BOY??? HM OKAY GUESS WE GOTTA… WANDER OUT OF THE HOUSE… BEFORE WE COME BACK AND KILL HIM. SURE HOPE NOTHING HAPPENS TO HIM BEFORE WE COME BACK. WOULD SURE BE A SHAME IF HE WERE TO MYSTERIOUSLY DISAPPEAR BEFORE WE COULD DO THAT THING.

the baby’s big sister, miriam, is like I GOT THIS. and she steals a basket and the baby and runs off and dumps them both in the river, where they whack into the knees of an egyptian princess, who is like “oh shit now i gotta be responsible for this water bottle.”

“i have an IDEA,” says miriam, popping helpfully out of the bushes. “why don’t you keep the baby and say he’s an egyptian and he won’t die. but also give the baby a BABYSITTER. wow i found one. she is jewish and also my mother. WHAT A COINCIDENCE HAVE A GREAT DAY”

so the baby, moses, is Definitely An Egyptian!! Not Jewish At All!! but raised by jews with jewish values. (THIS ALSO HAPPENED TO FOUNDING FATHER ALEXANDER HAMILTON. LOOK IT UP.) and identifies largely as a jew 

and one day he’s wandering along the pyramids and sees an egyptian whipping a jewish slave. he goes, NAH BRO, and kills the egyptian.

…have u heard of conflict management???? says the pharaoh, and kicks him out of the country. where he wanders and wanders and eventually meets a dude, becomes a shepherd for him, and marries one of his daughters, cos that’s how the life cycle works in Whateverthefuck BCE

one day he’s a-wanderin out in the desert when he comes across a bush. (you allllll know this bit.) and the bush is on fire but it’s not burning up and it starts yelling about taking his sandals off, etc, etc, and moses is like holy shit, it’s god.

Yeah, says god. Yes. I Definitely Remembered That I Had Jews And Now I Am Here To Free You From Slavery With A Genius Plan.

wow!!! says moses. what’s your genius plan!!!

Tell Pharaoh To Make You Not Slaves, says god. 

uh, says moses.

Look, says god. You Got Any Better Ideas, Hotshot? I Don’t Think You Do. And I’mma Send Your Brother With You Cos You Got A Speech Disorder. You Know How I Knew You Got A Speech Disorder? Cos I’m God. So Fucking There.

so moses heads back to egypt and is all like, sigh, okay, let my people go. look. i have this cool staff and it turns into a snake. it will eat your magician’s snakes. wow. this is not homoerotic at all. can we stop being slaves?

lol, says pharaoh.

WELL THAT FUCKING WORKED, says moses to god.

LOOK! says god. Look. Look I Have A Lot Going On Right Now!! Okay!! Jesus God!!! Always With The Judging!! Look, Have You Considered Turning Their Entire River Into Blood? That Always Works For Me.

THIS COULD HAVE BEEN YOUR FIRST RESORT INSTEAD OF THE FUCKING SNAKE THING??? says moses.

so they turn the river into blood. pharaoh is like, okay, dude, i can make water red too, we live in egypt, it is called iron in the soil. 

god is like, Nah, I Got More, Watch This Shit. frogs start pouring out of the nile; pharaoh’s like FINE Y’ALL CAN GO. 

god’s like cool!!! bam no more frogs!! moses is like COOL BRO THE FROGS ARE GONE SO WE’RE GONNA LEAVE TOMORROW. pharaoh’s like haha what? leave? who said you could leave? no one said you could leave. you gotta get that hearing checked moses bro

FINE, says god, and sends a shitton of lice; same deal happens, pharaoh is like YEAH and then is like UNYEAH. god sends a shitton of flies; god sends a livestock disease; god sends boils; god sends hailstorms; god sends locusts; god sends darkness for three days; pharaoh is like LOL, NOT LETTING YOUR PEOPLE GO; ralph fiennes and val klimer have a great duet; everything is terrible.

so god says to moses, Okay. Tell Your People, Take a Lamb And Slaughter It, And Paint Its Blood Above The Doorway Of Your House.

you’re gross, says moses.

No, says god. You Don’t Get It. This One’s Serious.

so the jews paint their doorways with lamb’s blood. moses goes to pharaoh, says, dude, i know we’ve had our bad times. but this is your last chance. i don’t want this to escalate, you don’t want this to escalate. sure, your people have been keeping my people as slaves and mistreating us, but there’s some shit that we do not want to do.

hahahaha, says pharaoh. knew u were too chicken to go through with it. have fun being slaves, nerds.

so moses goes home, and the sky opens up, and the jews pray in their rooms all through the night and open the doors in the morning to a wailing in the streets, because the angel of death has killed the oldest child in every single egyptian household.

Moses, says god. You Gotta Get Out Of Here. Don’t Even Let Your Bread Finish Baking. Just Run.

the jews grab their shitty unrisen bread and their living children and they run as far and as fast as they can until they hit the red sea. at which point they realize, well, they’re fucked, because pharaoh’s army is behind them, and it’s coming after them to take them back to be slaves again.

god has been following along in a pillar of fire and smoke, and god’s voice from the pillar says, Okay, Moses, This One’s On You, Raise Your Snake-Staff Thing Over The Red Sea. and moses does, and the sea splits in two– the waters pulling back, the dry land before them– and the jews run and run and run, and behind them, the enormous wave of the water crashes onto the egyptian army.

(brief interlude: AND THE WOMEN DANCING WITH THEIR TIMBRELS FOLLOWED MIRIAM AS SHE SANG HER SONG (HEY!) SING A SONG FOR THE ONE WHOM WE’VE EXALTED, MIRIAM AND THE WOMEN DANCED AND DANCED THE WHOLE NIGHT LOOOOOONG)

and they keep walking through the desert, and the bitter iron water becomes sweet when moses puts wood into it, and bread falls from the sky when they are hungry, and god says, Okay, I’ve Got A Place For You, It’s Not Five-Star Or Anything, But It’s Got So Many Livestock And Bees That It’s Literally Flowing With Milk And Honey.

that’s wonderful!!!! say the jews. oh my god you’re literally the best we love you oh my god!!!!

Cool, says god. How Does ETA: Forty Years Sound To You.

so they all gather at mount sinai, and moses walks up the mountain like okay, kids, you have literally one job and that’s to not worship anything, ‘kay? KAY, say the israelites.

moses goes to argue with god for a long while, and the israelites are like HE’S GONE, HE’S DEAD, LET’S GO, MOTHERFUCKERS, and melt down all their jewelry and make a cool cow out of it and start worshiping the cow. moses comes down and is like GOD FUCKING DAMN IT, smashes his tablets, has to go back up the mountain again.

Why Do I Even Keep These Assholes, says god.

i dunno, says moses. i guess if you wanted, you could wander off and let us be slaves for a hundred years. wait that would be terrible gosh you would never do that.

…Anyway, Let’s Get Stonecarving, says god.

down in the desert, we the jews make bad jokes at each other, get into arguments, poke at the gold cow bits, rest, wait for god to come back.

Apr 18, 2016 1,296 notes
#i love these #okay #these speak to the part of me that still knows how to sing sabbath blessings and be a smart ass about challah #that part is alive and kicking i promise #religion #story time #history according to tumblr

vaspider:

spyderqueen:

fire-is-her-water:

I keep seeing this fucking argument about trans people using bathrooms like “Well if that had been an option for me back in the day I totally would’ve signed up as a ‘trans-whatever’ to get into the girls’ locker room back in high school”  (Yeah, the fuckwit on FB I saw earlier actually said ‘trans-whatever’).

Like, you really, genuinely think that you, as a 16 year old presumably straight teenage boy would have changed your name, requested everyone you know call you by different pronouns, changed your entire wardrobe and look, went to school presenting yourself as a girl, dealt with the bullshit you would likely have gotten from your parents, family, friends, classmates, teachers, doctors, neighbors, people on the street, and rearranged your entire life…

Because you maybe, might have possibly caught a glimpse of a titty in the locker room?

Yeah, it’s clearly the trans people we should be worried about.

I always find it interesting that they seem to think that declaring “Given the opportunity I absolutely would have been a sexual predator” is a defense of their position.

I always find it interesting that they seem to think that declaring “Given the opportunity I absolutely would have been a sexual predator” is a defense of their position.

I am just going to save this, modify pronouns as needed, and use it as a response to this. Forever.

Apr 18, 2016 124,899 notes
Apr 18, 2016 52,844 notes

kopfen:

just–mae:

kopfen:

I hate how some people are so arrogant or obnoxious when it comes to fandom shit like calm down you’re not some holy gate keeper to the land of whatever the fuck. Buzz buzz it’s Copernicus and he wants you to know that ur not the center of the universe so shut the fuck up and let people have their fun


I’m going to make this

Apr 18, 2016 254 notes
Replace one word of your url with “discourse”
Apr 18, 2016 24,074 notes
#discourse-writ-in-starlight #ai #maybe not #yes?
Apr 18, 2016 345 notes
#hamilton

anamatics:

thevelvetdevil:

smallercomfort:

luchia13:

hey guys psa regarding hospital bills

don’t just pay it. do not automatically pay the hospital bill when you receive it. call your health insurance provider and POLITELY say, “excuse me, i just received a bill for $1200 for my hospital visit/ER visit/etc., is that the correct amount i’m supposed to pay?” because hospitals bill you before your health insurance and they will take your money no matter how the amount due may change based on your health insurance looking at it. 90% of the time, if your health insurance is in any way involved in the payment of that bill, you do not have to pay as much as the hospital is billing you for. call your health insurance provider first, and POLITELY request clarification, always remember that the person you are talking to is human and this is just their job, and then you will very likely find out you actually only owe $500.

don’t shout at anyone about it, don’t get mad, just understand that this is The Way Things Are right now and call your health insurance provider before paying the bill your hospital just sent you. there’s a chance the hospital bill might be correct, true, but call your health insurance provider.

THIS IS SUPER IMPORTANT. after my car accident last year the hospital billed me ~$8000. They sent me letters asking me to pay, and I called them back saying my insurance was processing the claim. This is also what I told the collection agency when they kept calling me about the $1000 emergency room fee (billed separately from the hospital fee, mind you). Once everything got straightened out, all I was actually liable for was my $200 emergency copay.

!!!!!!! things my ass didn’t know !!!!!!!!

Yes this is a life lesson my adulting ass didn’t know I needed and I’m out 80 bucks for an anti-nausea pill. 😒😒😒😒😒

Apr 18, 2016 199,662 notes
I don’t say this enough but thanks for following me. it means a lot.
Apr 18, 2016 637,874 notes
  • Karen and Matt: (share multiple scenes)(create a bond over time)(flirt)(kiss)(start dating)
  • me: Ok, this actually isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I mean I don't resent this as much as I thought I would while watching season 1. In my opinion, they would fit with each other more like friends, and I always preferred Matt and Claire together, but it isn’t that bad. Actually, they are kinda cute. I love Matt, I love Karen, they are both great people and they respect each other and support each other and are great friends, so this definitely isn’t that bad of notp as I would have expected in a theory. I guess one day I will be able to actually like this. I don’t mind it that much.
  • Frank: Her. I need to talk to her alone.
  • me: O. M. G. sign me the FUCK up 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 that’s what i’m talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit
Apr 17, 2016 2,863 notes
#basically me #my response to matt and karen was to sit bolt upright and throw my hands out #and literally scream 'DON'T DO THAT' #and like i guess i kind of came around on similar logic to above but still #ON THE OTHER HAND #frank castle #and #karen #are everything to me #i still really think their ship name should be kastle #because i think i'm hilarious #daredevil: a mess of saints and martyrs #kastle
GO ON ANON AND ASK ME THE MOST AWKWARD QUESTION YOU CAN THINK OF. IF I CAN'T PUBLISH IT, YOU WIN.
Apr 17, 2016 744,481 notes

keeperofthehens:

thequeerwithoutfear:

peace-bros:

hollowedskin:

xekstrin:

addidesu:

thequeerwithoutfear:

thequeerwithoutfear:

listen, i’m not saying that sensory processing disorder is basically the same as having daredevil-style supersenses, but that’s exactly what i’m saying

on a related note, i’m concerned that matt has only realized the bad things of strong sensory processing. like i don’t think matt takes full advantage of all of the things that are Amazing

is matt murdock playing with soft fabrics all the time? is matt murdock listening to Super Nice sounds? does he have a soap he loves the smell of? is he squishing flour in his hands? is he thumbing through book pages? is he petting cats? has matt murdock stuck his face in a warm soft cat belly recently 

has matt ever played with marbles? what about a single heavy round metal marble? does matt play with sea glass? does matt take warm baths? does matt take warm baths and put cold ice packs on his head at the same time? does matt suck on ice cubes? 

i just don’t think he’s doing this supersenses thing right and i would like to show him. like, matt. this is very important. i need you to take these scissors and run them down this wrapping paper for me. it will feel so great. matt. stop punching people for a second and stick this sticker to something. matt we need to wash your hair Super well also please put your hand in the sleeve of this fuzzy robe and touch it to the rest of the robe it’s like being a tiger. matthew michael murdock we are going to the yarn store Right This Minute to touch some stuff and buy nothing, also put your hand in this dirt it feels amazing this is the greatest thing that’s ever happened ever and you’re missing it why

We don’t see Matt Murdock indulging in these because he still has complicated Catholic guilt when it comes to feel-good situations like no i’m not worthy of sticking my hand into this bag of rice i have sinned.

#LET MATT SQUISH FLOUR

matt let me take you to the dry produce store we will buy dried beans and put them in the fridge then stick our hands in them and pour them on our faces you will love it i guarantee.

Matt… tell the story of what this bolt of fabric has been through. Matt, pls. Tell the really cool story.

i am SO HERE for this post expanding into exploration of cool sensory things matt murdock would enjoy. SO HERE. 

No one has told him about stim jewelry like spinner rings! D:

Apr 17, 2016 6,115 notes
#matt murdock #MATT HAVE YOU EMBRACED SOFT FLANNEL FRESH OUT OF THE DRYER #OR PLAYING WITH A STRING OF BEADS THAT ALL CLACK TOGETHER #IN A REALLY NICE ONETWOTHREE PATTERN #daredevil: a mess of saints and martyrs #OOOOOH WHAT ABOUT RICE #HONESTLY I SWEAR TO GOD JUST STICK YOUR HAND IN A BOWL OF UNCOOKED RICE #IT'S LIKE IF WATER WAS SOLID AND IT RASPS NICELY AND YOU CAN FEEL EVERY GRAIN #GO FORTH AND TRY IT

feynites:

libations-of-honey-and-milk:

In fairy tales and fantasy, two types of people go in towers:  princesses and wizards.

Princesses are placed there against their will or with the intention of ‘keeping them safe.’
This is very different from wizards, who seek out towers to hone their sorcery in solitude.

I would like a story where a princess is placed in an abandoned tower that used to belong to a wizard, and so she spends long years learning the craft of wizardry from the scraps left behind and becomes the most powerful magic wielder the world has seen in centuries, busts out of the tower and wreaks glorious, bloody vengeance on the fools that imprisoned her. 

That would be my kind of story.

When Princess Talia was fourteen, her eldest sister was placed in a tower.

Princess Adina was eighteen by then, and so of a marriageable age. She had grown quite beautiful, though she was more willful than winsome, and she did not care for the notion of the tower very much at all. Their mother did her best to persuade her on the subject. After all, the queen herself had been eighteen when her own parents had sent her to live in that very same tower, to be safely tucked away until her husband could be chosen, and then ride out to claim her. A tradition going back ages and ages.

Keep reading

Apr 17, 2016 72,084 notes
#ADLER #remember i mentioned that there was a post that prompted that very detailed story idea #this was the post #writing #nice #tbh i like my idea better but this is very nice

squidsisters-callie-marie:

fatalmirage:

eshusplayground:

claidilady:

steinbecks:

FOR FUTURE REFERENCE :

tumblr does this thing now where if you’re mentioned in a post with the @ system, you get notifications EVERY TIME that post is reblogged. basically, it treats every reblog after that @ as a brand-new notification of that @.  i’ve been getting notifications like 10 times a day on [this post] over here because it has like 10,000 notes now and every new reblog is a new notification for me. 

so if you want to share something with a friend*, just use that handy-dandy little messaging arrow at the bottom of the post and save everybody’s notifications

*(me)

oh my god tumblr why can none of your IT employees code 

siiiiiiigh.

@staff PLEASE FIX THIS

The ironic thing is that if people keep reblogging this constantly enough they’ll be forced to be plagued by this exact problem until they fix it

DO IT REBLOG CONSTANTLY

Apr 17, 2016 25,067 notes
Apr 17, 2016 618,817 notes

carlosdavidvaldes:

if ur bi/pansexual

  • you can call yourself gay and queer (if you choose to reclaim the latter), bc u experience same-gender attraction
  • you’re not in a “gay” or a “straight” relationship based on who you’re dating unless you want to define it as such yourself (you don’t need to let someone else define it for you)
  • don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself if the validity of your sexuality is being questioned based on the relationship you’re in or if you’re more attracted to one gender than others
  • also ur cute
Apr 17, 2016 157,565 notes

raisedbyhyenas:

raisedbyhyenas:

a thing I want: cute fluffy slice-of-life bullshit between monster girls and their human girlfriends

none of this broody “w-what are you” nonsense, just like

tossing a frisbee around with your werewolf girlfriend! (she swears up and down it’s not fetch, it’s just that it’s hard to throw a frisbee without opposable thumbs)

increasingly complicated reasons why your vampire girlfriend can’t actually skype in with your parents

your siren girlfriend singing opera in the shower

etc

and also none of them die tyia

Apr 17, 2016 20,621 notes

punkie-san:

sonseulsoleil:

teapotsahoy:

cornerof5thandvermouth:

ahsatan:

bloodpactscout:

miss-zarves:

i can’t believe it’s 2014 and there’s still no gay romantic comedy about vin diesel and dwayne johnson falling in love

They raise a gaggle of kids undercover working for a gov’t agency together

#’this summer…these two men learn…the heart is the most important muscle’

i would pay multiple dollars to see vin diesel and dwayne johnson portray a cute affectionate couple

Can’t believe it’s 2015 and there’s still no gay romantic comedy about vin diesel and dwayne johnson falling in love

THE THING IS I FEEL LIKE THEY WOULD BOTH DO IT IF THEY HAD THE CHANCE AND THAT’S WHAT GETS ME

I can’t believe its 2016 and there’s still no gay romantic comedy about vin diesel and dwayne johnson falling in love

Apr 17, 2016 431,173 notes

prokopetz:

Now that Deadpool 2 has been confirmed, folks are getting all worked up over what new characters might be introduced. There’s been talk that the director really wants X-23, but there’s also concern that now that Negasonic Teenage Warhead is popular, their roles might overlap too much to accommodate both of them (and realistically, there’s no way that Negasonic won’t be in the sequel).

I would like to propose a solution:

Introduce X-23 as Negasonic Teenage Warhead’s love interest.

*takes deep breath*

*screams forever*

Apr 17, 2016 2,943 notes
#YES PLEASE #SIGN ME THE FUCK UP #I NEED IT #negasonic teenage warhead #negasonic is my favorite i love her #deadpool
Apr 17, 2016 276,512 notes
Play
Apr 17, 2016 164,788 notes
#hamilton #writing #me as fuck
“

Once, Philip II of Macedon sent Sparta a letter threatening to raze the city if he captured it.

In response, the Spartans sent back a single word.

“If.”

”
—a fight for the dawn; e.tammi (via boromirs)
Apr 17, 2016 6,147 notes
#you know you're a latin student when your response to this is #'yep' #'sounds like sparta' #history according to tumblr #latin
Apr 17, 2016 4,132 notes
#star wars #poe dameron #very true

wtfspemily:

do u ever see a theory and ur like ‘nah the writers aren’t that clever’

Apr 17, 2016 255,358 notes
If you remembered to take your meds today, these penguins are clapping for you.

autoimmunityturtle:

If not, GO TAKE YOUR MEDS! Then come back, because these penguins are clapping for you.

Originally posted by erica-the-kitty

Apr 17, 2016 5,078 notes

perfectlymisha:

zelterxc:

creating aus like

@swaginsky

Apr 17, 2016 37,908 notes
Helpful things for action writers to remember

berrybird:

  • Sticking a landing will royally fuck up your joints and possibly shatter your ankles, depending on how high you’re jumping/falling from. There’s a very good reason free-runners dive and roll. 
  • Hand-to-hand fights usually only last a matter of seconds, sometimes a few minutes. It’s exhausting work and unless you have a lot of training and history with hand-to-hand combat, you’re going to tire out really fast. 
  • Arrows are very effective and you can’t just yank them out without doing a lot of damage. Most of the time the head of the arrow will break off inside the body if you try pulling it out, and arrows are built to pierce deep. An arrow wound demands medical attention. 
  • Throwing your opponent across the room is really not all that smart. You’re giving them the chance to get up and run away. Unless you’re trying to put distance between you so you can shoot them or something, don’t throw them. 
  • Everyone has something called a “flinch response” when they fight. This is pretty much the brain’s way of telling you “get the fuck out of here or we’re gonna die.” Experienced fighters have trained to suppress this. Think about how long your character has been fighting. A character in a fist fight for the first time is going to take a few hits before their survival instinct kicks in and they start hitting back. A character in a fist fight for the eighth time that week is going to respond a little differently. 
  • ADRENALINE WORKS AGAINST YOU WHEN YOU FIGHT. THIS IS IMPORTANT. A lot of times people think that adrenaline will kick in and give you some badass fighting skills, but it’s actually the opposite. Adrenaline is what tires you out in a battle and it also affects the fighter’s efficacy - meaning it makes them shaky and inaccurate, and overall they lose about 60% of their fighting skill because their brain is focusing on not dying. Adrenaline keeps you alive, it doesn’t give you the skill to pull off a perfect roundhouse kick to the opponent’s face. 
  • Swords WILL bend or break if you hit something hard enough. They also dull easily and take a lot of maintenance. In reality, someone who fights with a sword would have to have to repair or replace it constantly.
  • Fights get messy. There’s blood and sweat everywhere, and that will make it hard to hold your weapon or get a good grip on someone. 
    • A serious battle also smells horrible. There’s lots of sweat, but also the smell of urine and feces. After someone dies, their bowels and bladder empty. There might also be some questionable things on the ground which can be very psychologically traumatizing. Remember to think about all of the character’s senses when they’re in a fight. Everything WILL affect them in some way. 
  • If your sword is sharpened down to a fine edge, the rest of the blade can’t go through the cut you make. You’ll just end up putting a tiny, shallow scratch in the surface of whatever you strike, and you could probably break your sword. 
  • ARCHERS ARE STRONG TOO. Have you ever drawn a bow? It takes a lot of strength, especially when you’re shooting a bow with a higher draw weight. Draw weight basically means “the amount of force you have to use to pull this sucker back enough to fire it.” To give you an idea of how that works, here’s a helpful link to tell you about finding bow sizes and draw weights for your characters.  (CLICK ME)
    • If an archer has to use a bow they’re not used to, it will probably throw them off a little until they’ve done a few practice shots with it and figured out its draw weight and stability. 
  • People bleed. If they get punched in the face, they’ll probably get a bloody nose. If they get stabbed or cut somehow, they’ll bleed accordingly. And if they’ve been fighting for a while, they’ve got a LOT of blood rushing around to provide them with oxygen. They’re going to bleed a lot. 
    • Here’s a link to a chart to show you how much blood a person can lose without dying. (CLICK ME) 
    • If you want a more in-depth medical chart, try this one. (CLICK ME)

Hopefully this helps someone out there. If you reblog, feel free to add more tips for writers or correct anything I’ve gotten wrong here. 

Apr 17, 2016 162,090 notes
#*swoons* #i love you #marry me #writing #reference #it's awful because you could probably just talk like this on a date with me and i would so very much sleep with you afterward

thegadaboutgirl:

whowasntthere:

championofazura:

Girls, romanticize yourselves. You are a queen. You are a warrior. You are an enchantress. You are a mermaid. You are a goddess. You are all of these things and more, you are the stuff of fairytales. 

Women, traumatize others. You are a dragon. You are a wolf. You are a bump in the night. You are the last thing they see in the darkness. You are all of these things and more, you are the heart of their fucking nightmares.

Apr 17, 2016 508,967 notes
#fairy tales start life as nightmares #nightmares start life as fairy tales #burn the world and laugh and rebuild it in glass and silver #i approve of this

prokopetz:

I hate to be the one to break this to you, dude, but as a general rule, women don’t pretend to virulently hate men they’re secretly in love with as some sort of elaborate courtship ritual. That’s a trope we made up to justify why the male protagonist always gets the girl in the end even when it’s starkly at odds with prior characterisation. In real life, if she acts like she thinks you’re a creep, it’s because she thinks you’re a creep!

Apr 17, 2016 87,689 notes

crpl-pnk:

LISTEN it is very important that you RINSE YOUR RASPBERRIES before consuming because otherwise you are in DANGER of not having little droplets of water in the berries that you can sip like a tiny fairy tea cup

Apr 17, 2016 47,320 notes
the ideal werewolf novel

ladyzolstice:

greyramblings:

filecreator:

crockpotcauldron:

lectorel:

crockpotcauldron:

just looked through about 700 werewolf books, good grief.

most seem to fall into two categories:

  • werewolf serial killer mysteries
  • domineering alpha romances

neither is really what I’m interested in.

here is what I’d want from the werewolf novel of my wildest dreams:

  • good relationships, especially friendships between packmates (lone wolves are boring)
  • werewolves who like being werewolves. (angsty wolves are boring)
  • the practical details of werewolfery: who’s got the bail money for animal control, whether anyone’s microchipped, what you pack in a bag for a night out werewolfing
  • the uses of werewolfery: hiring yourselves out as trackers or canine rescue, getting certified as service dogs, spending your free time at the library letting little kids read to a friendly doggie
  • female werewolves, and no weird gross hypermasculine alpha stuff going on in werewolf culture
  • queer werewolves, and no weird gross heteronormative ‘laws of nature’ stuff going on in werewolf culture
  • dog jokes.

The standard urban fantasy female protagonist dating a werewolf who is not an alpha. Bonus points for it being a cute beta werewolfess who thinks her girlfriend’s perpetual posturing as the ‘baddest bitch on the block’™ is the most adorable thing ever. Extra bonus points for fuzzy baby werewolves and adopted babies. (Because actual wolf packs? Exist to raise children. They’re family units, focused around rearing cubs.)

#werewolves #queer wolves #werewolves as the foster parents of the supernatural world #if there’s a kid so much as sniffling in their general vicinity they’re going to get adopted #the fae discovered that they could straight-up hand off changlings to werewolf packs #no deception needed #magic using children of mundane parents who can’t handle it? #every pack has a dozen of them #fic ideas

okay this is one of the cutest reblogs I’ve gotten. 

imagine it

werewolves just going YES FAMILY GOOD and adopting everyone and making sure they get attention and food and understand that it’s fine to be who you are and that you’re not alone, you’re pack now

and the kids that can’t turn into wolves get to ride on the dogsleds to make sure they’re not left out during the full moon family bonding time (… you have to be an adult to pull a dogsled. mistakes have been made.)

werewolves on the PTA. werewolf den mothers. werewolf little league coaches. werewolves filling the bleachers and auditioriums and dance halls and galleries, cheering for their kids. werewolves helping kids with their homework, werewolves sewing costumes for the school play, werewolves showing kids how to change a tire

werewolves with battered kitchen tables with chewed legs. werewolves with huge family dinners. werewolves ferrying pies and casseroles and fresh baked bread back and forth between family members’ houses. werewolf extended families. massive werewolf packs that are technically only about 25% werewolf but still definitely packs

puppy teeth being left for the tooth fairy. fangs being left for the tooth fairy. cuttlebones being left for the tooth fairy. stolen teeth being left for the tooth fairy. werewolves with giant families full of kids with different needs and species.

werewolves adopting everyone. werewolves fostering everyone. werewolves who wind up with dozens of kids, all of whom are family and therefore pack.

yes good, give me more like this

ladyzolstice

i feel this in my soul

all right so whERE IS MY NOVEL?

Apr 17, 2016 67,640 notes
#werewolves #i love it #someone write this

idiopathicsmile:

ash-of-the-loam:

beautiesofafrique:

bogleech:

dimetrodone:

People horrifically fucking up facts about evolution and genetics too support their stupid beliefs or to seem smart and “rational” is probably one of my big pet peeves 

Yeah. An enormous number of racists, misogynists, homophobes and transphobes I’ve met eventually whip out something about evolutionary biology and they never, ever, ever, ever have the slightest shadow of even a half-right idea what any of it means or ever cite a claim ever actually made by a scientific study.

Here’s a quick handy reference list or anyone who isn’t sure:

  • Homosexuality does exist in almost all social species.
  • “Alpha males” are not a real phenomenon and in fact the most aggressive males tend to be the least reproductively successful.
  • “Survival of the fittest” simply means that the success of a species hinges on how well it “fits” its environment. It does not mean that stronger or smarter individuals are supposed to succeed. Those things can even be a detriment in nature by wasting too many resources.
  • “Race” is not a biological concept. Someone who looks different from you has the same human genes, just a different grab-bag of dominant traits.
  • Evolution is not a march towards higher complexity, more intelligence or even more adaptability. It’s just a fluctuation of characteristics dictated by environmental pressures and mutation. A slime mold isn’t “less evolved” than a hawk, just adapted for success under different parameters.
  • People didn’t evolve “from apes.” It’s more complicated than that. We are a category of ape, sharing a common ancestor with the other apes.
  • No human on Earth is “closer” to an evolutionary ancestor than any other. We all descended from the same one.
  • Neanderthals were also a “sibling” species of ours. We didn’t evolve from them.
  • Some of us did, however, cross-breed with Neandethal man. It is exclusively non-African races, such as white people, who still carry hybrid human/Neanderthal genes. Whoops, sorry “white purity” skinheads, you’re actually mixed with a whole other species.

Just had to reblog this because I am honestly so tired of people claiming that Africans are “less evolved” than everyone else 

My addition to the above list:

Epigenetics does not have anything at all to do with genetic memories. It is a thing that affects characteristics like health risks, and this speculation floating around about how phobias could be related to some ancestral trauma is complete and utter nonsense.

It’s only a matter of time before such a claim is used as another pseudoscientific tool in the arsenal of people claiming that bloodlines have anything to do with the validity of one’s worship of European pantheons. “My ancestors were Swedish, and because of epigenetics I have genetic memories passed down from those ancestors, so therefore my connection with the gods is better than yours!”

Just, no. Stop. STOP.

gonna also chime in here:

saying the “male brain” works one way and the “female brain” works another way is ludicrous. for so many reasons, even beyond the obvious of imposing that tired old either/or mentality with regards to maleness and femaleness

occasionally you will read about how a study suggests that “men are naturally better at spacial reasoning” or “women are naturally better at cooperation”, but for one thing, given how early the brain wires itself and how easy it is to influence the wiring (like, disturbingly easy), and given the tremendous social expectations we face from pretty much the moment we leave the freaking womb, it’s impossible to study gender differences in a vacuum. 

like, do your findings prove that “women are better at reading faces”, or do they prove that, when you are part of a group that has been socialized since birth to be “nice”, to take care of other people, and to above all avoid making folks angry, you damn well have to learn how to read the room, and read it fast.

also, the “left brain, right brain” thing is bunk. there are not, like emotion-driven people and logic-driven people. everybody is primarily emotional. that circuitry is older and reacts much faster, and this is why nobody is immune from sometimes making wildly irrational decisions.

Apr 17, 2016 288,027 notes
#the more you know #the more you fucking know

athenaltena:

ubercream:

mister-smalls:

ubercream:

mister-smalls:

Petition to sit down all the people who make coma theories about Adventure Time and tell them “listen, this fucking show is about the last human living in a post-apocalyptic world where deadly magic has been reawakened following a global thermonuclear war that wiped out the rest of the human species, how much fucking darker do you want it to be”

Even though I thought my first Creative Writing professor was kind of a douche, he made a good point about this. One of our first assignments was to write in this eerie, otherworldly style (we were mimicking a specific author whose name escapes me), so we had to write about eerie otherworldly things happening. It’s no exaggeration to say that more than half the class had a “big reveal” where we find out that the story’s strange events and themes are all in the mind of some person in an insane asylum, or someone having a drug trip.

My professor said something like, “you just successfully wrote a world that feels separate from our own, but got frightened last minute and shoe-horned in normalcy. You showed that you were afraid to commit to something different and interesting.” Though I’m typically a contrarian and a piece of garbage, I am inclined to agree with my professor. I feel like people who write coma theories and the like are afraid to accept that the world of the story is separate from our own. They like everything wrapped up in this crazy little realism box where nothing out of the ordinary happens in fiction.

you win the Best Addition to a Post prize

Thank you :)

This pretty well hits the nail on the head as to why I generally hate coma/dream theories and people who think they’re so fucking deep for coming up with it. In my book it’s LAZY, plain and simple.

ESPECIALLY since it’s all-too-often used as a way to cop out of building any sort of resolution for your characters and relationships.  It’s lazy storytelling, lazy characterization, and frustrating as fuck.  I call it ‘flinching,’ as in “You played Russian Roulette with your plot, and you flinched when you pulled the trigger.”

Apr 17, 2016 58,151 notes
#I HAVE A VENDETTA OKAY #I HAVE A VENDETTA AGAINST COMA/DREAM THEORIES #FUCKING GO HARD AND WRITE YOUR ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE WITH WEIRD MAGIC OR WHATEVER #JUST DON'T BE A COWARD #writing #you played plot roulette and you flinched when you pulled the trigger #i also use flinching to describe things like supernatural #where they keeps promising an apocalypse and NOTHING EVER HAPPENS #by the end of your fourth season promising an apocalypse #i expect a goddamn rain of fire or some shit okay #YOU FLINCHED
I'm sorry if this has been asked before, but what, exactly, is 'chain weld', and why do you consider it cheap or not worth the price tag? What's the difference?

Hi there! I think someone did ask this before, but I have no problem explaining something again, especially if I have new examples. Sometimes it’s easier to visualize when you’re looking at different versions of the same tiara design, so we’ll use Sarah Ferguson’s tiara as the example here.

Here’s the real one:

And here’s a “replica” that will set you back about $150 from a bridal shoppe:

Ugh, am I right? Doesn’t look remotely like it! This is what I call “chain weld”. It’s the method in which it was created. They took a pre-made chain of rhinestones and welded them into the pattern you see here. It limits the ability to form shapes, and it’s very clunky. Typically, chain weld pieces like this should run for $10-$15, which would be reasonable for what you’re getting, but bridal shoppes mark it up into the hundreds. 

Now, here’s a loss-wax, or pavé cast, replica:

Now that’s a bit more like it! The shapes have been sculpted and cast in metal before the stones are set into it. No abrupt square ends here, these flourishes end gracefully at leaf-like points as they should. Is it a perfect, exact replica? No way! But I’ll take this over that train wreck up above. Now, here’s the fun bit. This replica is going for $10-$25US on eBay. 

That’s lightyears away from the $150 pricetag of that terrible one above, no? 

Bridal shoppes are a scam. The bridal industry is a racket. And so are the tiaras they churn out. Love yourself, don’t buy over-priced rubbish.

Apr 17, 2016 1,609 notes

darling-hold-on-till-may:

crystal-gems-vevo:

loli-ass:

damnselfly:

quick protip: if someone is crying or freaking out over something minor, eg wifi not connecting, can’t find their hat, people talking too loud, do NOT tell them how small or petty the problem is to make it better. they know. they would probably love to calm down. you are doing the furthest possible thing from helping.

When someone gets upset over something ridiculous it’s because there’s a bigger stress going on and the tiny things are piling up and becoming stressful as well because of it.

Ask them what’s REALLY wrong.

Situations like this can also be results of anxiety, especially crying over loud noises.

People with BPD are sometimes really sensitive and things that seem really ‘small’ to others can actually set off a strong emotional reaction in us. Please don’t invalidate us.

Apr 17, 2016 387,516 notes
#i just #who tells someone that they're not allowed to be upset over things? #what is that? #don't do that #that's shitty #it's no fucking skin off your back to talk them down
Apr 17, 2016 17,659 notes
#sam wilson #steve rogers #I LOVE THEM SO MUCH OKAY #EVERYONE NEEDS A FRIEND LIKE THIS #EVERYONE

thetransintransgenic:

crowmeme:

the best and saddest thing on the internet to me is dead and defunct content - the still-standing electronic remains of people who are no longer here or no longer the same people who created them, all the links long defunct and the purpose long gone

your geocities pages, your forum threads, your facebook posts, may outlive you. everything you make may one day be an electronic ghost town, just glimpses of what was once an evolving part of someone’s life. look on the internet, ye mighty, and despair.

Of course, the other perspective on this is the exact reverse.

Around the colossal wreck, we are told, nothing beside remains – of this once-great kingdom, we must assume, of this king powerful enough to leave the tiniest fingerprint for us to see.

A ghost town is sad because of what might have been. The conversations that might have been had, the toys which might have been given to children and the young lesbians who might have ducked behind the store. The flecks of paint and the trails in the dust and the fingerprints.

But as for us – glimpses? Your Facebook page might outlive your grandchildren. All my friends I have on here – just on here – I have made through this one blog. How often have you scrolled through someone blog and thought “I would love to be friends with this person”? Why should 100 years make a difference? Glimpses? These are portraits and movies and snapshots and selfies and journals more deep and more raw than anything we have seen in history.

Look upon my very existent work – the fanfics written and the jokes shared, the stories we’ve woven together and the battles lost and the best of times we’ve had – frozen in amber, perfect as that day they were shared. Look upon my work and share it with me, laugh at my flaws and chide my innocence, listen to my rants and learn from my mistakes.

Folk’s not dead while their name’s remembers, we say as we read a book again and again and again, letting that one character live a desperate, vibrant life again and again and again… and us? HOW MANY NAMES WE HAVE.


We are not doomed to be Ozymandias – we will be the traveller, from our very own antique land, wandering endlessly and greeting every diver into the archives as yet another chance to live again.

LOOK UPON THE INTERNET, ye mighty – and live.

Apr 17, 2016 694 notes
#clearly i need sleep #because this #very much this #i am feeling incoherent #that's the spirit #you did good guys
Apr 17, 2016 102,201 notes
Play
0:30
Apr 17, 2016 427,320 notes

khoshekhs:

twinkwolf:

smokesforstiles:

I honestly cannot wait for the day when this generation is eligible to run for a political position because people are going to go digging into everybody’s pasts and at least like half of them are going to have to explain some of the shit they posted online like imagine watching a political debate and the front runner of a party has to attempt to explain away a snap they took of themselves where a big dick is drawn next to their head and it’s captioned “I love me some demon dick” literally how tf is anyone going to explain that, huh?

imagine having to explain 250k of omegaverse fanfiction you wrote when you were 22 live on CNN with the whole country watching

#“we’re here now with presidential candidate margaret ___ who has come under fire #for some comments she made on social media as a college student”  #“thank you for being here margaret”  #“what did you mean when you said ‘literally when will gwendoline christie raw me’?”  #“thank you john. i’d like to state for the record that my comments were taken far out of context  #what i actually said was that i wanted captain phasma; a character played by the actress gwendoline christie; to raw me  #it’s a pretty big distinction (via grandtheftcanine)

Apr 17, 2016 96,549 notes

recreationalcannibalism:

mr-radical:

when you think about how differently you act and talk depending on who you’re talking to and you sit there wondering which you is the real you

Hey friends! This is called code-switching and is entirely normal to do! You wouldn’t want to talk to everyone the exact same way because that’s just going to make things awkward or be inappropriate for various situations. You wouldn’t want to approach your boss the same way you approach your best friend or vise-versa. And you’re not being inauthentic or fake because you are a shining diamond with many facets and it’s totally okay to show different sides to different people because it’s ALL you!
Shine on you multifaceted motherfucker.

Apr 17, 2016 355,496 notes
Apr 17, 2016 340,596 notes
#all righty then #i like it #science! #medicine #...sort of #not really #swords

redandpointy:

shiksa-bitch:

so one skywalker twin took magic lessons from a frog, killed his dad, and fucked off to an abandoned island in his bathrobe.
the other skywalker twin gunned down space nazis, hooked up with han solo, and governed the free galaxy with snark and hair like a botticelli painting.
and you’re telling me *luke* is the one i should be inspired by?

Truth.

Apr 17, 2016 62,823 notes
#star wars #tfa #general leia #moran becomes a tremendous fan of general leia organa: news at eleven
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