Bodhi, sweet angel Bodhi, paid all of the attention in the empire induction safety talk; he presses the three red buttons at 12, 6 and 3 o'clock, twists anticlockwise 45° and the grenade is disarmed.
Unbenkownst to Chirrut, Jyn placed her crystal within his staff, a tiny morsel of hope; the blaster shot headed straight for his heart, strikes it instead, and is deflected into his shoulder.
Baze, seeing his love in pain and in danger, but not without hope for survival, flies into a rage and fights his way back to the ship, dragging chirrut behind him; he kills 32 men, and saves one.
Cassian and Jyn are just about to step into the lift when Bodhi hisses from the radio telling them to get where he can see them FAST; they don’t look down when they step over Krennic, even when he grips Jyn’s ankle and begs
Two days later Cassian is well enough to argue his way out of medbay, down to droid storage, where he loads K2-SO’s last backup into another imperial droid; K3-SO sighs and says, “Did you let me die again? You know as soon as I work out how, I’m deleting the self-sacrifice algorithm you wrote into me.”
If I bring this back on my main will y'all get it to a nice round 500
i dont think american filmmakers realise how huge london is, because sure you have the london eye and houses of parliament but when you say ‘london has fallen’ what??? so the nandos in catford is in flames? the tesco in peckham has descended into chaos? wtf??
And I don’t mean like attractive cute, I mean like baby otter cute. What if the stumble upon us and go “ohhhhh my god!!! Oh my god!!!! I’m dying this is- look at it! Look at them!!! Oh my god!!!”
We usually imagine having to come up with some Devils trade or unholy arrangement to get tech and trade with aliens, but the instant they see us the aliens immediately set out into conservation efforts. They’re like “their habitat is becoming harsh and unlivable for them! We have to save them!” And everyone just puts a picture of us next to this information and they all agree “Look at them! We have to save them!!” We become like the panda mascots of intergalactic conservation efforts.
Simultaneously, our main export is just streams, videos, holograms, and photos of us. Aliens lose their composure completely over videos of us sneezing or yawning or eating pop tarts or playing video games or taking care of our kids.
There are lines of aliens who would LOVE to have a human in their home or on their ship. It’s a little condescending (we’re not sure if we’re guests or well treated exotic pets) but still a good opportunity, and any human who wants can go to space at any time basically for free or even for profit, and the aliens will go out of their way to give you anything you ask for.
There are obvious downsides. We struggle to be taken seriously. While it’s usually shut down pretty quickly, every once in a while some alien group sees the demand for us and tries to start an illegal trade. But at the same time, it’s neat that somewhere out there is an alien (or usually a LOT of aliens) that would love you unconditionally, find every flaw and idiosyncrasy endearing, be worried about you and do anything they could to make you safe and happy. They work hard to make our planet and our personal lives better and don’t ask for anything in return. They just do it because they decided we are important and worth saving just for existing. It’s an odd relationship, and we’re not always sure what to make of it, but honestly it goes a lot better than we worried alien contact would.
I’m down to be a spoiled pampered alien pet.
It would be a lot easier to get “fixed.”
We’re all a bit confused by the cute human memes, which are usually just pictures of some random human with a phrase in alien cuneiform next to it, but which many of the aliens think are hysterical. Photos of the Lincoln Memorial are particularly popular for this for some reason, and it’s a little unsettling to see the alien spaceships with pictures of Lincoln plastered across their forcefields, saying “g+gnor’gax!” and the humor just doesn’t translate at all.
I mean, it’s not bad, exactly. Just…odd. And fortunately alien music is mostly outside our hearing range, so the sad commercials with the interstellar equivalent of Sarah McLachlan broadcasting over them, explaining how the humans are suffering at this time of rotation just look like a rather puzzling montage of normal people. It’s just the aliens get so sad when they see it and their temporal glands leak and it’s…well, a little messy.
I love the idea that we are SIMULTANEOUSLY batshit-bonkers space orcs and the alien equivalent of Red Pandas or kittens.
Like, “Oh they’re adorable!” “Yes, but for the love of zornax, don’t let one bite you! My pod-cousin lost a hand that way!” “Do you think they evolved this way to surivive the terrifying fauna on their world?” “I saw a holovid of one riding one of the so-called “moose” one time!”
#wait #we’re big cats #giant murder cuteness
Oh my god that’s exactly it! :D
But imagine that last bit as two different groups. Okay, so to one species of alien we’re adorable, right? And to another we’re orcs. Imagine the conflict of those two cultures. Team Orc is talking to Team Cuddles about how useful we are on dangerous field missions and Team Cuddles LOSES THEIR SHIT.
“You sent my cuddle-fwumpkin WHERE?!? to do WHAT!?!”
“They’re uniquely qualified to explore dangerous territories that are uninhabitable to most lifeforms … ”
“I don’t caaaaaare! Hfjfjfj HD bf!!!”
Like, foreign policy issued specifically for the proper utilization of human laborers. How would human cultures engage differently in these circumstances? Like, in the US would people look down on the humans that hang out with Team Cuddles as looking for alien handouts? Would they be blamed when Team Orc humans don’t get taken seriously on expeditions?
Like, there’s so muuuuuch more to explore here.
Cue unscrupulous or ironic human merchant selling “Save the humans! (Collect the entire set)” stickers in various alien scripts and fonts.
I’ve been around fanfiction for half my life, and I don’t bat an eyelash at any of it, but every now and then it hits me that fanfiction is how soooooooo many underage girls are learning about sex, an idea that alarms me for about 0.2 seconds before I remember it’s a better, safer, more positive education than they’ll ever get at school.
If you have questions about sexuality, youngsters, you could ask a counselor or nurse or a parent OR YOU COULD ask an older person in fandom because the odds are way better that we won’t be embarrassed by your freaky deaky.
No one who describes peens is easily embarrassed.
Except don’t ask me. I’ll tell you shit like “hey did you know you have a sphincter muscle in your eyes?????”
The computer said my next patient’s name was Lucifer, and that he was a domestic. Not that an unusual name for a pet, I have to admit.
“Come on in. Do you have Lucifer hiding in that box for me?” I say. A gentleman dressed all in black with a rather spiky aesthetic and a selection of piercings comes into my consult room and opens the box.
He places a perfectly black rabbit on the table.
Honestly, I had been expecting a cat.
Turns out Lucifer is his new rabbit. He’d insisted on taking it from a friend who wasn’t taking care of it a few months ago.
Lucifer, for his part, had decided the table was too scary and that his dad’s leather clad armpit was the best place to be.
To my surprise and delight, our new goth rabbit owner is doing everything right. Perfect diet, read up on rabbit health, vaccinating, enrichment, the works.
He even started a vegetable garden to grow treats for the rabbit, or as he put it, “tributes for lucifer.”
Steve Rogers gets himself an Instagram and follows Dwayne Johnson, as one does.
The Rock posts one of his giant breakfast pictures, as he is wont to do.
Steve, lil shit that he is, responds with HIS enormous breakfast, insinuating that perhaps Dwayne Johnson’s breakfast isn’t actually all that much food and if he ate THAT he’d be hungry in, like, an hour.
It goes on like that, for WEEKS, good-natured teasing about how much food they eat spilling over into Twitter and callouts during interviews.
Until they agree to have breakfast together, and the last post about it is just a picture of the two of them, lying flat on the Rock’s living room floor with his dog sniffing at Steve’s head, both of them with big hands splayed over their bellies like they can’t possibly fit any more.
Neither will say who actually can eat more – every time they’re asked, they start in on how awesome the other is and how much respect they have for each other and how glad they are that they got to become friends.
This is everything I have ever wanted.
The first video on the Rock’s instagram gets posted at 4:15 AM – this is not uncommon, nor is the fact that he’s walking around his brightly-lit Iron Paradise. It’s more the bouncing that’s unusual.
“You know what the BEST THING about being buddies with CAPTAIN AMERICA is? Yesterday I got to meet the motherfucking Falcon. That’s right, SAM WILSON was here, was right here! I asked him what it was like to fly, and he grinned at me and then we did like, an hour and a half of planks and v-sits and he had me hanging from the TRX to hold planks and I swear I was shaking halfway through and he just laughed and said, ‘now imagine you have a couple rockets strapped to your ass, now you flyin.’ and I’m tellin’ you, THAT MAN is a fucking ROCK, it was amazing.”
The camera swings around to the barbell setups before coming back to Dwayne’s face. “He also told me that Steve Rogers knows almost nothing about weightlifting and Steve agreed he’s got no idea where his PR might be, so today is gonna be LEG DAY. My entire torso is fuckin’ killing me, but this is gonna be AWESOME. Stay tuned, y’all.”
The second video of the day comes in the afternoon; Dwayne looks exhausted but Steve Rogers looks plenty fresh and also a combination of sheepish and smug.
Dwayne opens with a deadpan, “Leg day.”
“I learned so much!” Steve is enthusiastic, almost bouncy. “This guy is a great teacher.”
“He also,” and the video pans around to the barbell setups seen earlier in the day, “broke my motherfucking gym.”
The thick barbell in the middle of the floor is wickedly bent, standing on its own in an inverted V. All of the big metal plates are scattered around the floor instead of on the racks, and several dumbbells are also twisted into odd shapes. One of the biggest weight plates is buried high in the far wall, only about half of it sticking out, like a giant ninja had thrown a shuriken.
“Don’t worry, Dwayne, we’ll figure out my deadlift PR eventually,” Steve’s voice comes from behind the camera.
“Man, fuck you,” Dwayne can be heard before the video cuts out.
The weight plate stays up in the brick wall; Dwayne doesn’t actually tell anyone that he’d asked if Steve could do that so he’d have a souvenir.
My favorite thing about Dungeons & Dragons is how fucking quickly people become ride-or-die bitches with each other
no lie i had a campaign where I tried playing a really chaotic neutral “leave me alone” rouge and ended up attached at the hip to our monk who couldn’t roll higher than a natural 10 to literally save his life bc in our first encounter he called my character “a nice lass” and that was all it took
“what’s new pussycat” is playing in the starbucks right now im yellin g
tHE BARISTA IS SMIRKING OKAY THIS WAS 100% INTENTIONAL
there’s a table of girls laughing and singing along holy shit they knOW
the baristas are feigning innocence i canno t believe this im living a real life salt n pepper diner experience right now
i realize i put a lot of information in the tags of the first post so let me reiterate: it was definitely playing on a loop. it looped at least 4 times before the girls at the table caught on and started teasing the baristas about it
update: they’re now playing all-star by smash mouth, this starbucks is run by a bunch of meme loving fucks
caesar a lot of people think caesar was hot and while he’s probably one hell of a power bottom (every woman’s husband and every man’s wife as the romans said), he also apparently was really weirdly obsessed with removing all of his body hair?? i mean clearly he got around so he was probably bangable but i don’t know how i feel about this. VI/X isn’t being bald on top of your head enough for you julius
mark antony do i even need to talk about mark antony? he’s ancient rome’s greatest slut and proud of it, you know he’s bangable. just don’t marry him because you never know when he’ll end up divorcing you and becoming an enemy of the state so he can hang out with cleopatra. X/X slut machine
brutus honestly historical brutus was kind of a turd and his pillow talk is probably really depressing because he feels all this pressure to be like his king-banishin’ monarchy-smashin’ republic-foundin’ super-ancestor. like ‘waaaah i gotta go kill caesar because blah blah republic’ the republic was failing anyway who cares can we talk about something other than your inferiority complex. II/X extorting provinces isn’t sexy, brutus
pompey the great i guess pompey might have been sexy at one point in his youth but every time i think of him i can’t help but laugh at this stupid fake alexander the great hair and that doesn’t really make him very bangable in my eyes. IV/X please stop with the weird alexander fanboy thing
crassus let’s be real, crassus probably only has sex in the missionary position and almost definitely comes first. he’s got all that money but is it worth it??? III/X probably still worth the money though
clodius pulcher his name literally means clodius hot boi so like, there’s not even an argument there, you know this guy is smokin. the only problem is that he was a TREMENDOUS dumbass half of the time and loved to pull shit like sneaking into women-only festivals like an idiot so you just have to watch out for his nonsense. IX/X bang him and leave before he does something sacrilegious and gets you condemned to tartarus
cicero alright, now i know some of you are reading this and immediately thinking “sarah thoodleoo, please tell me you’re not going to say cicero is bangable because that is one step too far even for you,” but i need you to hear me out, okay? first of all, cicero is an orator so you know he’s good with his tongue. second, he was named a pater patriae, so you know he’s daddy material. maybe he’s not the best bang in the late republic, but he’s not the worst either. V/X i’m sorry if i made you unwillingly think of cicero as a daddy but in fairness this isn’t the first time i’ve said that so i don’t know what you expected
cato the younger like having sexy with crassus but with none of the money and all of the extra discomfort of listening to him rant about the good ol days while you’re trying to sleep and not think about how dissatisfied you are. -I/X stoic more like stoi-ick
i dont want girls sexualising mlm relationships anymore. at all
i dont want them fetishizing our relationships bc they think it’s sexy
i dont care if its a “way for them to express their sexuality”. that aint right and its messed that they can say that they want men in the porn industry to stop fetishizing wlw relationships, only to do the same bc its “fandom”
can yall please reblog this actually ??
bc like. im a boy attracted to boys. and this is making me uncomfortable and i want it to stop
and im not the only one ? a handful of people have agreed with me and im sure there are more
please dont ignore this bc you want to keep writing/drawing/reading m/m porn…. or bc im a boy and you dont care what i have to say….. especially if you disagree with the treatment of wlw in the porn industry its a double standard and this is important to me and i dont want it to be swept under the rug
Add on: you can still write, draw and read about mlm without fetishizing them. By fetishization, OP means that you only see these relationships as sexy and sinful instead of just seeing it as average everyday relationships.
Nearly every girl I’ve met within fandoms with mlm ships has only focused on the men having sex or calling them ‘my nasty gay babies’ and that’s just gross.
Okay I’ve got it. Jason Momoa is a soulful artist turned boat mechanic after his baby sister Auli'i Cravalho was placed in his care. At sixteen, her goals include winning the upcoming inter-school gymnastics competition, getting an A in maths, and finding love for her stupid big brother. She keeps setting him up with tourists coming to Hawai'i - Uzo Aduba, Oscar Isaac, Andy Samberg (they have a hilarious bro date), Angel Coulby, etc.
But then! His childhood best friend, John Cho, has returned to the island after years away, and all of Jason’s old quiet pining returns. Auli'i realises this, and shenanigans ensue involving all the previous dates and basically half the island.
Dear Amy, can The Rock also be in this? Love, Kait
Unless in your world you get milk from a “milk-beast” you don’t put people to sleep with “sleep-weed.” There are dozens of real plants that actually put people to sleep: Lemon balm Valerian Passion Flower Chamomile Poppy Lavender Catnip Hops Rooibos Skullcap Virgin’s bower Lady’s slipper Feverfew Motherwort Bee-balm bergamot perilla figwort I found them after 0.35 seconds of googling.
(herbologists out there: I know there are probably some mistakes there. Feel free to correct me)
On one hand, yeah, I get it that it’s nice to learn about something real in fantasy books.
But on the other hand…I am NEVER going to throw real herbs into my stories. Not unless I know it’ll be near-impossible for a child to overdose. Not unless I know I can take time (without an editor removing it) to explain how to safely prepare these tisanes.
Food preparations are one of the most easily made “fan creations” you can have rise out of a book series, since everyone has food on hand or can run out to a store to buy it, or go outside to try to forage it (if they see the internet says they have it living wild in their area). And you really, REALLY don’t want to accidentally lead someone who is young, or who just doesn’t know shit about cooking or chemistry or foraging, down a path where they poison themselves trying to make something. And that’s not even touching on foraging and “false friends”, where a plant might look one way in your area and be safe to eat, but might be poisonous elsewhere in the world where a similar-looking plant is found. There’s a mushroom in the united states that looks similar to an edible variety in Asia. As I understand it, a lot of poisonings occur among immigrants to the US from the region that has the friendly, edible type of mushrooms because they think the US variety is just as safe to eat, and it’s not. I would hate, hate, hate to set up a situation like that as an author, by assuming that a friendly, edible plant in my backyard doesn’t have false-friends elsewhere in the world.
J. K. Rowling handled this by making her potion ingredients fake or improbable to use. She could have had Snape talking about deadly nightshade, but he’s introduced talking about bezoars. Bezoars are from an animal’s stomach–hard to get, and gross.
Patrick Rothfuss handled it by making sure the dangers of fucking chemistry up were very firmly highlighted.
Unless I have a lot of time and place to safely explain how to use a plant, I’m absolutely going to go the “safe” route (”cheap” route to some of you) of using made-up herbs. I’d rather people be irritated with me being cheap or having weak worldbuilding than finding out some reader went and made themselves ill or dead because they trusted that information from my work was complete or correct.
Sure, some or all of those in the list above might be perfectly safe with no poison lookalikes around. I drink Rooibos tea myself–although I’ve never gotten sleepy from it.
But I’m just not educated enough about plants–even after having lurked on several sites online for months–to take a chance in my writing, since it’s just not me that’ll be taking a chance, but possibly readers who assume I know what the fuck I’m talking about. (When I might not!)
A very interesting response. I admit I hadn’t thought of the dangers of realistic herbology, but you’re right, especially for children’s books.
I think there’s a more elegant solution than just making up a name, though. Say “a certain herb” rather than the specific plant’s name and you’re fine. Or smudge the details.
Steven King does something similar with the crimes in his book—describing hotwiring a car in great detail but getting some things intentionally wrong so you can’t go out and do it.
In the vein of ladydomini’s response, I’d favor made-up herb names for an additional medical reason - even if something is super-safe or fairly benign in terms of side effect profiles, people generally don’t take these things in a vacuum, and you can never, ever cover drug-herb interactions in a fantasy world. (You can’t stop and say “Aeryn used St. John’s wort to help her mood, but wouldn’t have if she’d been on SSRIs like Prozac because of the risk of serotonin syndrome, or if she was on birth control, certain HIV meds, transplant drugs…”)
But there’s a second reason why you might choose to make up names, and that’s etymology. (It’s also why I picked St. John’s wort instead of going with one of the above herbs.) Because if you’re in a fantasy world where there are neither saints nor dudes named John, St. John’s wort doesn’t make a lot of sense to name-check, and referring to hypericum perforatum wouldn’t be any better. That’s not going to come up as *much,* but it’s definitely another reason.
(A third might be that you want an herb that has fantasy-world properties - something that doesn’t exist in the real world. Granted, you could randomly say valerian has magic-nullifying powers, but you might want magical plants for a magical reason - or maybe you want a plant with a pharmacological profile that doesn’t exist in the real world. I’m thinking here of ASOIAF’s moon tea and the tansy plant - it’s apparently both a very effective contraceptive and an abortifacient.)
So, yeah, this aspect of fantasy has never bothered me - I’d be more bothered by seeing real-world herbs incorrectly used, especially given the potential for RL trouble. (I guess whether you’d want your healers to be super non-specific or to say “I used tansy and athelas” is a matter of preference at that point; given the abundance of made-up names in the rest of fantasy, made-up herbs don’t bother me.)
Given how many times I read stories like that as a kid and tried to recreate ‘potions’ in the backyard….yeah I’m glad a lot of them were made-up names because me being a clever kid, I would have gone looking. Especially if I’d had the internet. Unless it’s like a practical, safe, real-world use (like “Annie put aloe leaves on her burn to help it heal” or “Margaret drank ginger and hibiscus tea to help her get over a cold”), I’d not include it. Made-up herbs work nicely and less chance of too-clever kids getting Ideas that could be a problem later.
Hell, the side effects make this a valid concern even with ‘harmless’ innocent ones. Did you know for instance that only SOME hibiscus flowers are edible for humans? Or that parts of Dandelion or Aloe if consumed can be a diuretic – which can be dangerous if one is dehydrated? Even aspirin (or ‘willow bark’ if we’re going with old-school herbs) can be dangerous to the wrong person – it happens to be a blood thinner, which is sometimes good if you are having a heart attack, but not so good (i.e. potentially dangerous) if you are menstruating, hemophiliac, bleeding or anemic.
I’d actually urge similar caution with crystals and rocks btw; some stones cannot be safely exposed to sweaty skin or water or heat or what not, because they produce unsafe chemical reactions under the wrong circumstances.
as a former dumbass kid that had to be stopped from drinking poison nettle tea after reading a YA wiccan flavored book,
please. Use fake names of plants.
This is the kind of thing I would never even have thought of, but it’s a really interesting and valid concern.
i have indeed thought of it, and would like to propose a solution to satisfy both parties:
use made up plants, but put some effort into designing them.
don’t call it ‘sleep-weed’, call it ‘slugbane’ or ‘ketterling’s false poppy’ or ‘somniflora’ or ‘purple fretleaf’. give it a name that sounds like a real plant name. problem fucking solved.
i hope youre all lying and hyping your cv/resume’s up
i have never gotten an interview and not been offered a job position after it
I mean lets be honest if everyone else is gassing theirs up like no tomorrow and you’re being as honest as you can who th are the recruitment team going to be more interested in
There’s people working in my banks head office with me WITH MUCH MORE EXPERIENCE than me BUT ARE GETTING PAID LESS
we’re doing the exact same job role
the point I’m trying to make here is if you’ve handled finances for a company you’re now what i would call a treasurer my g, if you’ve done admin work you are now a secretary (or as I’ve put Management secretary)
you help some kid with his homework? you’re a private tutor.
keep your bullets points for the job role as concise and important sounding as possible AND ALWAYS EMPHASIS THAT YOURE A TEAM PLAYER IF YOURE GOING TO WORK IN A TEAM.
go into that interview room and get your story straight the night before and remember that interviews are two way conversatons yes they might be grilling you but at the end of it make sure to grill them BACK. do you have any hesitations about my qualifications? my suitability for the job? any feedback on my cv? how long have you been working at this company? do you like it here? whats the work environment like?
I ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS GET THE SAME FEEDBACK WHEN THEY GET BACK IN TOUCH WITH ME
“ive never been asked those questions before” / “you were one of the strongest candidates”
throughout the interview emphasise that youre about progression, that you want more responsibilities than you did at your previous job, tell them the hours here are more suitable for me than my last ones were, AND WHEN IT COMES TO SALARY NEGOTIATION its all about continuity. tell them again that it boils down to progression. make up a reasonable figure for how much you were paid in your last role (do your research for how much the industry youre applying to or the role youre applying for pays, base it on that) tell them you expect more than you were previously paid. do not give them a figure. progression is your primary focus, tell them if youre progressing youre happy. leave it at that.
LIE THROUGH YOUR TEETH AND GET THAT MONEY
I had an interview yesterday, at the place I’ve been temping, where I busted out the “is there anything about my skills or background that makes you concerned about my fit for this job” question for the first time.
Neither of my supervisors had never gotten it before either. They had to think for a while, and then it turned into them telling me how great I am and what they love about me.
This stuff is real. I would also say: none of it is lying. This is taking experience that you normally downplay and write off, and putting it in accurate words they’ll understand.
It’s hacking the capitalist system. Why ISN’T helping a kid with homework “tutoring”, when the only thing missing is a paycheck?
It’s especially important for anyone who isn’t a cis white man, because many of us are so thoroughly trained to feel like we are not good enough.
Privilege tells people they can fake it, and that they’re good enough just as people and can learn the skills on the job. Abuse and oppression tell people they aren’t good enough as people and that even their high skills are probably below average, and that unless they had the specific job title or were using certain skills officially, nobody will think it counts.
The goal is to at least fake the confidence of a privileged person, to give the employer a chance at seeing the skills that you’ve been trained to undervalue.
You are learning addition. You blink. There is differential calculus written on the whiteboard. The longer you stare, the less it looks like numbers. The sky is a different color than when you closed your eyes.
Your final grade has not been posted yet. It has been two days. Your final grade has not been posted yet. It has been a month. Your final grade has not been posted yet. It has been a year. Your final grade has not been posted yet.
You look at the posted list of required math credits for your major. It is not written in english. It is not written in any language you know. It is not written in any language you don’t know. You close the list of required math credits before it can look back.
You cannot remember a time before your 8 AM. You leave the auditorium only to find yourself back in the auditorium. It is time for class.
You have had the same advisor your entire college career. Every time you see him, he has more teeth. Eventually, you stop seeing your academic advisor. He still sees you.
Students that go to look through the reference section of the library return different. The unlucky ones don’t return at all.
You go to a school of 20,000 students. You see the same 10 individuals at random points on campus every day. There are 19,989 other students. You’re not sure if you want to know where they are.
People are screaming in your dorm. People are always screaming in your dorm. “Somebody must be going out partying,” your roommate says. You both know that isn’t true.
You have a paper due in four days. You never finish it. The deadline never draws any closer. You have a paper due in four days.
A man sitting alone on the snowy, empty quad tells you that you will die in exactly 47 minutes. You walk away. You glance back, from a distance, and see only your footprints. You walk faster.
The squirrels fear no one. You do not make eye contact with the squirrels. They grow bolder every year, graduating from stealing trash to stealing food off of your plate. You shudder to think what they will steal next.
There is always someone in the study room. You have never seen them leave. It is always the same person. You have never seen them anywhere else.
Greek Town gets larger every time you pass it. There are houses with letters that aren’t in any alphabet you know. The residents have hollow eyes. A baby emerald sleeps here. You don’t know what it means. You don’t think you want to know.
heres an actually helpful executive dysfunction tip that isnt “just do one thing so you can do other things” or some bullshit
narrate what you need to do. out loud. in the present tense and first person. “i’m picking this shirt up off the floor. i’m picking is empty can off the floor. i’m putting the can in the recycling. i’m putting the shirt in the hamper. i’m taking the hamper to the laundry room.” etc. it’s one of the only actually effective things ive figured out. i think what happens is it tricks me into thinking im already doing the task, which is the hard part (starting). keep doing it as you do the task until the initial frustration is alleviated. give it a shot if you want. or dont im a blogger not a cop
For months, every morning when my daughter was in preschool, I watched her construct an elaborate castle out of blocks, colorful plastic discs, bits of rope, ribbons and feathers, only to have the same little boy gleefully destroy it within seconds of its completion.
No matter how many times he did it, his parents never swooped in BEFORE the morning’s live 3-D reenactment of “Invasion of AstroMonster.” This is what they’d say repeatedly:
“You know! Boys will be boys!”
“He’s just going through a phase!”
“He’s such a boy! He LOVES destroying things!”
“Oh my god! Girls and boys are SO different!”
“He. Just. Can’t. Help himself!”
I tried to teach my daughter how to stop this from happening. She asked him politely not to do it. We talked about some things she might do. She moved where she built. She stood in his way. She built a stronger foundation to the castle, so that, if he did get to it, she wouldn’t have to rebuild the whole thing. In the meantime, I imagine his parents thinking, “What red-blooded boy wouldn’t knock it down?”
Her consent didn’t matter. Besides, it’s not like she made a big fuss when he knocked it down. It wasn’t a “legitimate” knocking over if she didn’t throw a tantrum.
His desire — for power, destruction, control, whatever- - was understandable.
I know it’s a lurid metaphor, but I taught my daughter the preschool block precursor of don’t “get raped” and this child, Boy #1, did not learn the preschool equivalent of “don’t rape.”
Not once did his parents talk to him about invading another person’s space and claiming for his own purposes something that was not his to claim. Respect for her and her work and words was not something he was learning. How much of the boy’s behavior in coming years would be excused in these ways, be calibrated to meet these expectations and enforce the “rules” his parents kept repeating?
There was another boy who, similarly, decided to knock down her castle one day. When he did it his mother took him in hand, explained to him that it was not his to destroy, asked him how he thought my daughter felt after working so hard on her building and walked over with him so he could apologize. That probably wasn’t much fun for him, but he did not do it again.
There was a third child. He was really smart. He asked if he could knock her building down. She, beneficent ruler of all pre-circle-time castle construction, said yes… but only after she was done building it and said it was OK. They worked out a plan together and eventually he started building things with her and they would both knock the thing down with unadulterated joy. You can’t make this stuff up.
Take each of these three boys and consider what he might do when he’s older, say, at college, drunk at a party, mad at an ex-girlfriend who rebuffs him and uses words that she expects will be meaningful and respecte, “No, I don’t want to. Stop. Leave.”
This is so brilliant. We learn things from socialization process. What our parents, friends and peers do, media and all. I think perhaps rape is because parents think boys will be boys, they bully, fight and destroy things, it’s their characteristics so they don’t bother to stop them. But it manifests in them, knowing or unknowingly, they will just think, because I’m a boy and boys tend to do these, so it doesn’t matter even if the girl hates it, says no, because I’m a boy.
Just reblog this, this message is really powerful. For parents and future parents.
What’s also interesting, is if you frame this as about spoiling your children, and about spoiled children, people tend to agree and get it. They’ll agree that children whose parents lay down no boundaries for them when they hurt others, who let them have whatever they want at the expense of others, and justify away the harm they do, will probably grow up thinking they can do this to others (usually weaker than them, or they perceive as weaker) as adults. But if you mention the word “privilege”, “entitlement” or anything relating to gender, everybody freaks the f- out and will deny up, down, back, forth, and sideways that how you raise a child, what you allow them to get away with, or training them that their hurtful behaviour will always be justified, can affect them at all.
TOP FIVE STORIES PEOPLE HAVE ABOUT VICTOR "MY HUSBAND" NIKIFOROV
HOW CAN I PICK JUST FIVE, DADVANS, HE IS LIKE, A CRYPTID THAT JUST WANTS TO SHOW YOU PICTURES OF HIS BEAUTIFUL HUSBAND AND ADORABLE DOG. WHO PROBABLY DON’T EXIST. HE PROBABLY BOUGHT OUT SOME DUDE’S STOCK OF MODELING PHOTOS. THERE’S NO WAY A DUDE THAT CUTE EXISTS IN THIS TOWN, WE’D KNOW ABOUT IT.
“okay you know that guy who comes in, the russian one that tips well?” “wait, the one that’s always talking about his husband and their dog?” “yeah, that guy! he came in with cupcakes he said his husband made, they’re in the break room.”
“so we had this girl being harassed, and like, this super gay dude just sat down beside her, whipped out an ipad, and started showing her pictures of his husband and their dog like he’d known her for years, and the guy trying to hit on her tried to tell him they were talking, and the super gay dude says, in this super Russian accent ‘don’t be stupid, nobody would want to talk to you. go away. we’re looking at pictures of my husband’.” “LMAO that’s My Husband, he’s always here when his husband is travelling.”
“this guy came in to get an actual fucking blue rinse on his hair and spent the entire time talking about how his husband learned how to knit and made him a scarf and he went on and on about how talented he was” “was the scarf good” “lmao it looked like someone threw yarn against a wall and picked it up all tangled” “what did you say?” “what do you think I said, he tipped me 40% and took ten cards.”
“I think My Husband is catfishing us, because I looked at the pictures he has of My Husband and lmao that’s like, Yuri Katsuki the skater.” “what, really?” “I mean, My Husband is hot or whatever, but can you imagine being married to him?” “lmao he probably downloaded the pictures and built this entire imaginary life about him and Katsuki, poor dude.”
“GUYS. GUYS, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. ALERT. ALERT. GUYS. MY HUSBAND’S HUSBAND IS AT THE BAR, AND HE HAS OUR DOG WITH HIM. ALERT. ALERT. MY HUSBAND’S HUSBAND AND OUR DOG ARE REAL, AND THEY’RE SITTING AT THE BAR. ACT CALM.” “holy shit it’s actually yuri katsuki.” “are you fucking kidding me.”
Tony couldn’t seep. Sometimes he managed a few hours if he was tired enough, so usually he went to the gym and worked out until he was exhausted. Tonight, though, he found the gym already occupied: Barnes, with his hair tied up, working steadily at the heavy bag. Normally Tony would make an awkward comment and leave him to it, but instead he just heads for the opposite side of the gym. After setting up at one of the far treadmills, Tony worked his way to a easy run. Barnes was laying his fists rhythmically into the bag, and the quiet thumping was sort of strangely soothing. Between the running and the thumping, Tony slipped into a near-trancelike state.
And then Barnes let out an ungodly howl, drew back his left fist, and slammed it straight through the heavy bag with a roar of, “DIE A THOUSAND BURNING DEATHS!”
Tony fell off the treadmill, scrambled to his feet, and booked it to the elevator.
kingofmemes posted:
holy shit you guys there was a spider on my punching bag !!! thanks to my many years of combat experience & martial arts training things are okay now
well okay so morgan is this movie where they bioengineered this kid to be a weapon (or technically they made IT for PURPOSES) and rose leslie is in it and i love her and kate mara as well but anyway!! i thought it had great potential, and that the characters deserve screaming about BUT plot-wise it fell flat on its face like a third of the way in and never got back up AND I WAS DISAPPOINTED. more info: directed by ridley scott's kid, released 2016.
WHOA I THOUGHT I DREAMED THIS RESPONSE. Actually I definitely dreamed half of it. Kids, take it from your Auntie Moran: do not check your notes on your phone while half asleep, it makes your brain do weird shit.
But for real, that sounds like a great premise and honestly I might watch the thing to that I can bitch about it and then rewrite it.
so on the subject of stolen property, i’ve seen various arguments on this point but it is in fact true that inheriting something from a relative, when you know full well that it was stolen, does not make it yours.
this clearly goes doubly so for powerful magical artifacts, and especially for artifacts which are strongly implied to contain part of their creator’s soul!
you can talk about consequences - maybe the artifact in question has benefits for you, maybe you’re not convinced its rightful owners would use it responsibly - but talking about the consequences doesn’t erase the fact that whatever benefits you think you’re getting are achieved through wrongful means.
which is why i, too, think Frodo should have given the One Ring back to Sauron. thief.
Hahahahaha here comes the law student nerd ready to complicate your wonderful post, op.
(Really this is just pretext for me to study for my property final in a week, so thanks yeah)
Because according to the principles of common property law, the matter of who actually owns title to the One Ring becomes really complicated really fast.
Buckle up babes for the pedantic law lecture no one asked for.
HAVE YOU WATCHED MORGAN AND IF SO WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT IT
I have not, and some googling has not produced a show or movie by this name, so EITHER my Google skills need work (POSSIBLE, because this is the first time I’ve dragged myself out of the PubMed hole in a while) OR there is a typo here. Regardless, feel free to hit me up with a pitch.
for the ask meme: dog person or cat person, and are you a musician? cheers!
Lol I said I’d be on top of my shit with this ask meme, but then I discovered there is in fact a physiological limit to how long you can sleep for four hours a night before your body hits the Off Switch.
Dog person or cat person?
Normally I’d say I like both (DOGS ARE AFFECTIONATE AND FLOOPY, CATS RUMBLE LIKE TINY ENGINES, WHAT’S NOT TO LOVE), but the new RD in my dorm has a pupper except he’s not a pupper he’s like a woolly bear who is probably bigger than me, his name is Charles and he is the most amazing thing in the world, he goes “boof” whenever he’s wandering the dorm and someone comes through the door. Also he loves scratches and to have his ears flopped and he always tries to follow me back to my apartment and I AM GOING TO STEAL HIM, so per force I am currently a dog person.
Musician?
I sing, to variable degrees of success, and I used to play the flute, HOWEVER, I can’t read sheet music for love nor money. I’m just fucking incapable. But I have excellent pitch and I learn pretty well by ear, which is pretty much how I fumbled by with the flute thing.
if you hop over to @elidyce's blog, you may enjoy a recently reblogged post on legal possession of the one ring!! wasnt sure if u were ok with me tagging u in it. have a nice day!!
I will tag you in anything and everything. Honestly its basically me scrolling through things and going 'oh I know a human who would like this' and bam....you get tagged
AND I AM SO THRILLED THAT YOU DO. Honestly I suck spectacularly at remembering to tag people in posts but DO NOT BE FOOLED BY MY POOR MEMORY it makes me so happy when people tag me in stuff.
“You know the difference between subjective and objective,
right? ‘Some rabbits’ is the former, ‘three rabbits’ is the latter, and much
more accurate. So I’m going to need you to be very clear when you say there are
‘a few’ dragons outside.”
Dorian
Pavus, formerly of House Pavus in Tevinter and lately of Skyhold, Altus and
ex-heir of the Magisterium, had borne witness a number of strange things in his
life, the vast majority of which had come to pass in the last six months. These strange things have included, among
others, an archdemon, a Qunari with a jovial temper, a Seeker and a Templar
working side-by-side with mages, a truly preposterous number of demons
all-too-solid for his liking, and whatever the blessed hell that sword-horned terror
in the stables was called. And, of course, there was Rhosyn Lavellan, Dalish
elf, Inquisitor, Herald of Andraste, and presumptive savior of the world, whom
he had personally seen get into fights with no less than seventeen great
bears.
Seeing that
sort of person walk out of a ravine and immediately turn on her heel, looking
distinctly pale under the black ink of her lacework vallasin, was notably
strange, even among such a prodigious collection of oddities.
