Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

the-carol-of-peter-pettigrew:

downerpress:

bitterpunktrash:

I wonder if J.K. Rowling will ever actually write an important character as a minority, or if she will just leave it open and then claim it later when it doesn’t affect her sales so she can seem very politically aware

this! exactly.

Okay but she didn’t say “yes this is how I’ve always imagined her #officially canon” she says she LOVES black Hermione. As in appreciated the vision that other people have come up with

Not that it wouldn’t have been nice to have more representation explicit in the books but maybe it is POSSIBLE???? that she has since become morE AWARE?? that representation is important???? And out of respect for the influence of her series, is trying to do better now????

But that’s crazy. Everyone knows people never change, are always as ignorant as they were twenty years ago when they first started writing aNd defINITely wouldn’t do anything to give an impression to the contrary for any reason but to make themself look good

wallflower227:

dynamic-ideation:

cutiereferences:

steampoweredcupcake:

jada-the-spoopy-adventurer:

ramblinprose:

unseilie:

fullofbeansandspunk:

everythingbutharleyquinn:

asinheavenasinhell:

thnafu:

• Use the hand you write with.

• Make a fist with your thumb outside, not tucked inside. If it’s tucked inside your fist, when you punch someone, you might break your thumb. The thumb goes across your fingers, not on the side.

• Don’t be like in the movies—don’t aim for the face. Face punches don’t usually stop people, and you can miss when they duck their head or break your hand on their jaw. If you want to get away quickly, or end a fight, aim for the chest, or the ribs. If you really want to do some damage, e.g., you’re being attacked, aim for the throat, which will make it hard for your attacker to breathe for a hot minute.

• When you punch, you want to aim and hit with your first two knuckles. Not the flats of your fingers, and not your ring or pinky knuckles, which can break more easily. You can use your weight, if you’re on your feet, to add wallop, and spring into a punch with your feet and torso.

Useful information, esp. if you haven’t taken self defense.

I reblogged this once before to add this and I’ll do it again…

keep your wrist straight.

You can also risk breaking your wrist if you allow it to bend.  I actually can’t believe this isn’t in there.

Other good pointers:

• if your attacker is male, go for his junk - especially if he’s wearing loose pants. There’s no sportsmanship when it comes to assault so fuck them balls UP
• punching pretty much ANYWHERE in the face is going to actually hurt you a LOT (just think - you’re punching your bones into their bones and ow). If you’re going for the face, my suggestion is to strick upwards with your palm.

see that meaty portion highlighted in red? There’s a lot of muscle and fat right there which makes it excellent for striking. Hold your hand as shown and aim for the nose or chin (though I’ve been told in extreme circumstances, doing this to the nose can be fatal but I’ve never really heard if this is true or not) and just aim upwards

• other delicate areas: 
• the shin (hurts like a bitch if you kick it right - also, you can hit this spot if you’re being held in a choke-hold and if your attacker has to move in order to stop you from kicking him, he’ll have to angle his body so as to expose his stomach and crotch to the wild spastic jabbings of your elbows)

• the solar plexus (either jab while holding your hand in a sort of spear position or use your elbows - unless you’re super strong, your punch probably won’t wind your attacker. Your elbow or a spear hand will, however)

Originally in (most) martial arts, you hit the solar plexus because it supposedly contained an important chakra. Now we know that it actually also contains like a bunch of necessary organs that are exposed just below your ribs and is also (roughly) where your diaphragm lives so getting punched there is not pleasant.

• the clavicle (from experience, getting hit in your clavicle HURTS LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER. If you strike downwards with your knuckles, the person might just cry. Like I did.)

• the ear (this is probably the best place to punch besides the throat. It’s all cartilage so it probably won’t hurt you all that much and most people will be like “DUDE YOU PUNCHED ME IN THE EAR WHAT THE HELL”)
• the kidneys (this is harder to hit without training but if you somehow get your attacker’s back to face you, try to hit’em in the kidneys. Again, from experience, this FUCKING HURTS. You can’t really hit the kidneys from the front with any effect but from the back it is super painful)

• if you’re held in a choke-hold, try turning your head so the forearm isn’t pressed into your throat. If you can position yourself right, you can sort of force your chin into the crook of the elbow, making you able to still receive (limited) oxygen and provide time for you to kick some shins or elbow some spleens and shit

-Also, remember that a guy’s junk is not an off-button. Don’t think that you can rely on a swift kick to the balls to immediately incapacitate him in an emergency. Adrenaline and anger can keep somebody going for a long time even through extreme pain, and if you expect to end a fight with a single groin-attack you might be caught off-guard when he doesn’t drop. Certainly go for it if you get the chance, but keep hitting him until the fight is over.

-Draw blood if you can, especially if you can draw it from the face or the eyes. Blood in the eyes is not just a good way to impair your attacker’s vision, it’s also a really good way to freak them out and let them know that they might be getting more than they bargained for by picking a fight with you.

-Elbows and knees are really powerful weapons. Elbows are very sharp and very strong and if you are in close-range they are often more effective than trying to throw a punch. 

-Yelling and shouting makes you scary. 

Nothing much to add to this, it’s pretty much all there. So. Reblog. Oh, also, it’s really easy to break a nose - go for the eyes too. All it takes to avoid a shot to the throat is tucking your chin.

Also, that part about the ear - don’t punch. An open hand over the ear hurts a lot.

Tumblr teaching me how to fuck a bitch up

Also if you fuck up their face it’ll be easier for police to identify the attacker.

If someone gets you from behind and you cant punch them, go for the underside of the upper-arm. A bad pinch there is legit so painful because that skin is super sensitive.
Also this cant be stressed enough, if the attacker is a guy then fucking rip his junk off.

When throwing a punch:

reblog to save a fuckin life

And try your best to stay off the ground!! Keep a wider stance, bend your knees- do what ever you can to stay balanced

A couple other tips!

Even if your attacker is female, a solid knee or kick to the crotch will hurt.  

Tip for chokeholds: if you can force your chin into the crook of their elbow (like described above), you’re right next to some sensitive tissue.  A hard bite will be unpleasant for you, but REAL PAINFUL for them.

Aim for joints if you can–slamming a kick into the outside of their knee can rip tendons, pop ligaments, and damage bone.  If you have a corner at hand, try to slam their arm across it at the elbow.  Grab a finger if you can and try to snap it at the bottom knuckle–this is also a good trick for pushy guys at bars/parties/whatever–by jerking it back at hard as you possibly can.

Try to use your environment!  This can be hard in the heat of the moment, but trust me, if you can slam their head into a wall or hit them with something heavy, they’re going to need a minute before they can come at you again.  That minute can be unspeakable valuable.

There’s no such thing as a dirty move when you’re fighting to protect yourself: yes, kick that guy in the balls, nail that girl with a headbutt to the nose, kick them while they’re down, bite, scratch, rip out hair, stab your fingers into their eyes.

It is not a crime or a failure to get help.  If you’re being attacked on the street, scream ‘fire’–unfortunately more effective than most other things.  If you’re being attacked in a building, try to break a window or get into a hallway, and then scream.  If you have the option to get someone to back you up, take it.

Nor is it a crime or a failure to run.  If you manage to put your attacker on the ground, or somehow mildly incapacitate them, don’t assume the fight is over.  As someone so astutely pointed out before, adrenaline can work wonders, so they might be able to get up even if you’ve done damage.  If you’re close enough to a crowded area or a locking door to get there fast, sprint.  Your best bet is to either render yourself inaccessible (locking door) or render the witness count unacceptable (crowd). 

If you’re not close to a crowded area or another ‘safe’ location, take the moment when your attacker is incapacitated to kick them as hard as you can.  I’d recommend the back to avoid the risk of them grabbing your ankle and taking you down with them.  Aim for the kidneys (just below the end of the ribs), but barring that, stomp on them.  I’m serious, stomp the shit out of them.  Use your heel, put as much of your weight into it as you can, and try to shatter a hand or break their ribs.  (Warning about stomping someone’s ribs: this may cause complications including fractured ribs, punctured lung, pneumothorax, etc, and those can be lethal, so…like…be aware.  Relatedly, yes, a palm strike to the nose can cause the bone of the nose to damage the brain, causing death and death-like symptoms, but it’s sort of unlikely that you could manage it by accident.)

In the event that your attacker gets you on the ground beneath them: this is the most tactically disastrous position you could be in.  You WANT to be on top, where you have the freedom of movement to punch them in the throat/nose/solar plexus and then get back up.  First, you need to limit your attacker’s movement, which means going against your instinct to escape.  The best way to keep someone limited in this position is to lock your legs around their waist as tightly as you can, just above the hips–the thigh muscles are insanely strong, so they’re unlikely to be able to just shrug you off.  This brings your attacker closer to you, and you can further immobilize them by hooking one arm around their neck if you’re strong enough.  Once you have them trapped like this (having someone locked into this position, with your legs around their waits, is called having them in your guard), you have a degree of control, and they’re too close to punch you.  I recommend (from experience) jamming a thumb into their trachea (windpipe, right at the hollow of their throat).  Alternatively, clap both hands over their ears as hard as you can.  If you’re not lucky, this will be incredibly disorienting and rather painful to boot.  If you ARE lucky, you might blow their eardrum.  Slam your forehead into their nose, try to break it.  Use your close range to try to stab a finger into their eye (like I said, fight dirty).  The ultimate goal is to make your attacker disoriented enough to scramble out from underneath them, roll them so that you’re on top, or get up and beat them to a vertical position.  Anything that will accomplish that goal is fair game.

Aaaaaand that’s what I’ve got off the top of my head for actual combat, if anyone wants tips for avoiding combat in the first place message me.  It’s possible that I might be a little paranoid, but hey…who’s judging.

Oh.  Forgot one thing.  If someone’s pinning you to a wall and you have their face close to your face, take as deep a breath as you possibly can, get close, and scream like a goddamn banshee.  Embrace your inner fire alarm.  Remarkably alarming at close quarters, they’ll probably let you go or at least loosen their grip for long enough to get a good hit in.

nothorcruxes:

People shaming jo for supporting a black hermione now, but in past saying emma was exactly how she envisioned her are really missing the point. Jo is white, and she saw a lot of herself in the character so it makes sense for her to see hermione as white. But despite this she has always, ALWAYS said it’s amazing how people see the characters differently and she has always supported that.
So don’t start attacking her now for being fake, instead maybe question why you have to be so bitter and cynical despite this happy and amazing casting.

plasticbagvevo:

me trying to comfort a sad friend

yourdailyace:

mettatonpng:

yo btw if u ever have a crush on an aromantic person or anyone on the aro spectrum please don’t try to put the other person on the spot for not returning your feelings.

Like, don’t go “oh my gosh imagine if you weren’t aro! We would have so much fun…” Or “aw man, I wish you weren’t aro…” Because that’s disrespectful and makes it seem like the other person is at fault for the feelings YOU developed.

So if you ever have a crush on your friend who’s aro, please don’t be rude or disrespectful. Don’t invalidate their identity and romantic orientation because you want a romantic relationship with them. They don’t.

This goes for everyone. It’s really rude to tell someone that their sexuality or gender (who them are) inconveniences you because you like them.

What the fuck, is this a thing people do?  Who does this?  This is so shitty.  If you want to privately be sad that someone is (FOR WHATEVER REASON) not returning your romantic interest, that’s okay.  But then remind yourself that…shit, man, that person doesn’t owe you anything.  No.  Nothing.  Your unrequited feelings are your problem, not their fault.

Shit, I want to punch something.

iouafez:

So I’m in theatre class

We’re working on Shakespeare scenes for competition

A couple of freshmen boys are doing a scene that mentions a sword

The teacher is trying to tell them that they do not need to have a prop sword

They are not understanding

So young

So naive

“90% of the time” she says

“When Shakespeare says ‘sword,’ he’s not talking about a metal sword”

They are still not understanding

The rest of the class understands

We know what we are witnessing

The destruction of innocence

They are so new to the ways and language of the bard

Cinnamon rolls

Pure

Unaffected by theatre kids

Untouched by the horrors of the world

They still do not understand

The teacher does not know what else to do

She knows they cannot go to competition wielding an actual prop sword

She knows they will eventually learn

The class knows this too

We are dying to know what she will say next

She opens her mouth

We are on the edge of our seats

She yells

“LETS TALK ABOUT PENISES!”

Whoop.

There it is

The secret is out

Shakespeare makes dick jokes

Theatre teachers sometimes say things other teachers don’t

It is a shock to their system

In their minds, the kill bill siren

Their world has turned upside down

We can see it in their face

We lose it

We are accustomed to this

We have heard worse

But seeing their faces

It is too much

At this moment

The door opens

A sophomore enters

This is his first theatre class

All he heard was

“Let’s talk about penises”

He shouts out in a confused horror

The cycle is never ending

realsocialskills:

I wrote a post a while back about how some people are very good at getting away with doing intentionally creepy things by passing themselves off as just ~awkward~.

Recently, I noticed a particular pattern that plays out. While creeps can be any gender, there’s a gendered pattern by which creepy men get other men to help them be creepy:

• A guy runs over the boundaries of women constantly
• He makes them very uncomfortable and creeped out
• But he doesn’t do that to guys, and
• He doesn’t talk to guys about it in an unambiguous way, and
• When he does it in front of guys, he finds a way to make it look deniable
• And then some women complain to a man, maybe even a man in charge who is supposed to be responsible for preventing abuse in a space
• and he has no idea what they are talking about, since he’s never the target or witness
• And he’s had a lot of pleasant interactions with that guy
• So he sympathizes with him, and thinks he must mean well but be have trouble with social skills
• And then takes no action to get him to stop or to protect women
• And so the group stays a place that is safe for predatory men, but not for the women they target

For example:

• Mary, Jill, and Susan: Bill, Bob’s been making all of us really uncomfortable. He’s been sitting way too close, making innuendo after everything we say, and making excuses to touch us.
• Bill: Wow, I’m surprised to hear that. Bob’s a nice guy, but he’s a little awkward. I’m sure he doesn’t mean anything by it. I’m not comfortable accusing him of something so serious from my position of authority.

What went wrong here?

• Bill assumed that, if Bob was actually doing something wrong, he would have noticed.
• Bill didn’t think he needed to listen to the women who were telling him about Bob’s creepy actions. He didn’t take seriously the possibility that they were right. 
• Bill assumed that women who were uncomfortable with Bob must be at fault; that they must be judging him too harshly or not understanding his awkwardness
• Bill told women that he didn’t think that several women complaining about a guy was sufficient reason to think something was wrong
• Bill assumed that innocently awkward men should not be confronted about inadvertantly creepy things they do, but rather women should shut up and let them be creepy

A rule of thumb for men:

• If several women come to you saying that a man is being creepy towards them, assume that they are seeing something you aren’t
• Listen to them about what they tell you
• If you like the guy and have no idea what they’re talking about, that means that what he is doing is *not* innocent awkwardness.
• If it was innocent awkwardness, he wouldn’t know how to hide it from other men
• Men who are actually just awkward and bad at understanding boundaries also make *other men* uncomfortable
• If a man is only making women uncomfortable but not men, that probably means he’s doing it on purpose
• Take that possibility seriously, and listen to what women tell you about men

tl;dr If you are a man, other men in your circle who are nice to you are creepy towards women. Don’t assume that if something was wrong that you would have noticed; creepy men are good at finding the lines of what other men will tolerate. Listen to women. They know better than you do whether a man is being creepy and threatening towards women; if they think something is wrong, listen and find out why. Don’t give predatory dudes who are nice to you cover to keep hurting women.

freakingdork:

knatalie:

okay but please please tell me someone sat down and wrote after-mulan fic where some days li shang wakes up and rolls over and murmurs mulan’s name and reaches out for her only to hear “call me ping today” whispered back

and how everyone else not in the know thinks he has a wife and a secret army boyfriend and that he’s hiding one from the other

and someone tries to tell mulan and she just collapses laughing because they’re close but totally wrong

and li shang all the time just deals with it because he loves ping and he loves mulan and he doesn’t care what name he’s using or what gender he’s kissing as long as he can sneak one kiss a day

the dragon kind of creeps him out sometimes but it’s all cool

it’s all cool

blackgirlaesthetic:

car-crashhearts:

tyloriousrex:

fatandfabulousmermaid:

Pass it on

Wait…this made me feel really good about my entire existence

It’s lit! 🔥🔥🔥

Yes yes yes.

lotrlocked:

llamajun:

“Diamonds are a girl’s best friend” is a phrase often thrown around to prove that women are materialistic, but if you listen to the song you realize that it’s really about how men think a woman’s looks and youth are the only valuable assets she has. They’ll trade her in when she “loses her charms”, so she needs to collect diamonds and valuables to sustain herself when she’s old and alone.

Consider that the song was written and performed during a time when women couldn’t find a job for decent pay, that the only way they could survive financially was to tie themselves to a man and hope he’d stick around and provide support.

The real message is that men are shallow and flighty, so take their sweet words with a grain of salt and make sure you get something real out of the relationship.

Holla

howtomusicmajor:

• Someone calling in sick to work in order to sleep for their hour long shift.
• Someone breakdancing to a boombox blasting Christmas music on the quad.
  
• Someone crying because they got a free sandwich.
• Someone walking into the lounge at 1 am with a huge stack of books, and the determination of someone who forgot a term paper.
• Someone putting off writing their thesis because someone else needed math help and “logarithms are fun!”
• Someone taking a lighter to a notebook as soon as they left the science building.
• More than one flask being carried to class.
• Someone literally giggle evilly when given a 6-pack of beer.
• A freshman taking gen eds complaining about everyone else complaining about how hard finals are. (Note: the freshman may or may not have ever been seen again.)
  
• Someone crossing campus at a run in slippers.
• A nursing major explaining that finals are actually natural selection, and that she is the strongest and most adaptable and she was going to survive, while talking to herself.
• A different nursing major looking very forlorn because she just ran out of wine.
• Someone sleeping on a bench in the music building, with actual pillows and blankets and everything.
• Sticky notes with swearwords written on them littered around the science building.
• A group of students trying to one-up each other about how badly their juries had just gone.
  
• Someone leaving for the library at 3 am, because there was free coffee there.
• Someone flipping off the professor after being wished good luck on the final.
• The same person realizing that they have an entire lifetime of that class ahead of them, because it’s their major.
• Someone being questioned about how they wanted their funeral to look, after talking about the 8000 words they had due.
• Just, so many people sprawled on floors because it’s easier to do that than anything else. So many.
• The most genuine gratitude I’ve had directed at me possibly ever, because I gave someone a peanut butter cookie.

Finals: we’re all tired, hungry, and a little unhinged. It’s okay.

jamagotchi:

hey also remember that guy, martin shkreli, who bought the rights to that HIV drug then jacked up the price like crazy?

not only did he get arrested today but his lawyer increased his hourly rate by 5000%

“Shkreli, who reportedly received the news about the price hike while he was being fingerprinted, cried foul and accused his attorney of “outrageous and inhumane price gouging.” (Source)

merry christmas, good bless us everyone

And that, kids, is the true meaning of Christmas.

tweeckos:

inyouendohs:

My goal is to have a “controversy” section on my future wikipedia page

send me an anon describing my (future) controversy section

nineprotons:

geekandmisandry:

Getting salt from gamer boys in my inbox.

Listen up turd turrets, I WANTED to just play video games, I WANTED to just have fun, I NEVER wanted my gaming to be political or a struggle, I just wanted to play.

But you wouldn’t fucking let me, you brought up my gender, you judged me based on it, YOU made it political.

So now I WILL wreck everything with my fucking feminism, I am the feminist nightmare you fucking created.

Witness me.

Ride eternal, shiny and chrome.

nonasuch:

tora42:

margotkim:

margotkim:

Also, apparently we’ve all decided that we’re all going through life like the most important part of The Winter Soldier wasn’t that Pierce referenced Mama Fury? Like we’re okay with the movie throwing out her existence and none of us picking that up? It’s not like we needed canonical confirmation that Nick Fury was in fact of woman born, but like…she’s real, guys. She was recently alive. She was probably a SHIELD agent in the Civil Rights Era and left her son with her dad for weeks on end as she worked some real Cold War shit. She probably tangled with the Winter Soldier once in go-go boots. She probably told her son to believe in heroes, but you gotta go looking for them. She probably should be fancast as Nichelle Nichols and featured with Grandpa Fury in a billion different fanworks because Mama fucking Fury, are you kidding me

Seeing this old post getting new notes has reminded me that timeline can be whatever we need it to be, and these characters can be as old or as young as suits the story, and we need Mama Fury in Agent Carter, this isn’t even a question, we need it, we need her, we need the Fury family representing and being as much a legacy as the Starks ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Mama and Papa Fury meeting in the fledgling SHIELD under Director Carter, though. 

Juuuuuuuuuust saying.

e-wills:

clefunable:

so-smoke-em-if-you-got-em:

upsettingshorts:

illustratedpig:

heecawroo:

mewtini:

from a post on reddit:

Let’s put problems with spelling, grammar, narrative flow, plot structure, etc. aside and just look at the story and, in particular, the character arc of Bella Swan.

At the beginning of the story, she is moving from Arizona to Washington on her own volition - she has decided to give her mother and her step-father some time and space and to spend some time with her father. At this point in the story, she is, admittedly, a bit of a Mary Sue, but an endearing one. She is sensitive to the needs of others (moves to Alaska for her Mom’s sake, helps her Dad around the house, is understanding and tries to give the benefit of the doubt even when the other students are somewhat cruel to her when she first arrives), clumsy, out-of-sorts, and a little insecure. She’s not a girly-girl or a cheerleader type, doesn’t get caught up in the typical sorts of high school behavior, and in general functions as an independent person.

It’s worth noting that if Tyler’s van had smashed her, she would have (at that point) died as a fairly well-rounded, empathetic individual. We certainly wouldn’t say she died in need of redemption, at any rate. Instead, Edward ‘saves’ her - and this supernatural ‘salvation’ marks the beginning of a journey that ultimately destroys her.

As she gets more entangled with Edward, she becomes less and less independent, more and more selfish. She is accepting of his abusive behavior (stalking her on trips with her friends, removing parts from her car so that she can’t go see Jacob, creeping into her window at night, emotional manipulation) to the point that when he completely abandons her (walking out on the trust and commitment they’ve built together, in spite of having vowed to remain with her no matter what), she is willing to take him back. Edward is clearly entirely morally bankrupt.

Her father, Charlie Swan, is sort of the Jimminy Cricket of the story. His intuition is a proxy for the reader’s intuition, and he’s generally right. He doesn’t like Edward, because he can sense the truth - not that Edward is a vampire, that doesn’t matter in particular - but that Edward is devoid of anything approximating a ‘soul’ (for those strict secularists, you could just say Charlie can see that Edward is a terrible person). Bella is warned by numerous people and events throughout the course of the story that she is actively pursuing her own destruction - but she’s so dependent on Edward and caught up in the idea of the romance that she refuses to see the situation for what it is. Charlie tells her Edward is bad news. Edward tells her that he believes he is damned, and devoid of a soul. He further tells her that making her like him is the most selfish thing he will ever do. Jacob warns her numerous times that Edward is a threat to her life and well-being. She even has examples of other women who have become involved with monsters - Emily Young bears severe and permanent facial disfigurement due to her entanglement with Sam Uley.

Her downward spiral continues when, in New Moon, she turns around and treats her father precisely as Edward has treated her - abandoning him after suffering an obvious and extended severe bout of depression, leaving him to worry that she is dead for several days. She had been emotionally absent for a period of months before that anyhow. Charlie Swan is traumatized by this event, and never quite recovers thereafter. (He is continuously suspicous of nearly everyone Bella interacts with from that point on, worries about her frequently, and seems generally less happy.)

Her refusal to break her codependence with Edward eventually leads them to selfishly endanger Carlisle’s entire clan when the Volturi threaten (and then attempt) to wipe them out for their interaction with her - so she is at this point in the story willing to put lives on both sides of the line (her family and the Cullens) at risk in favor of this abusive relationship. Just like in a real abusive relationship, she is isolated or isolates herself from nearly everyone in her life - for their safety, she believes.

Ultimately, she marries Edward, submitting to mundane domesticity and an abusive relationship - voluntarily giving up her independence in favor of fulfilling Edward’s idea of her appropriate role. Her pregnancy - which in the real world would bind her to the father of her children irrevocably (if only through the legal system or through having to answer the kid’s questions about their paternity) - completely destroys her body. The baby drains her of every resource in her body (she becomes sickly, skeletal, and unhealthy) and ultimately snaps her spine during labor. Her physical destruction tracks with and mirrors her moral and psychological destruction - both are the product of seeds that she allowed Edward to plant inside her through her failure to be independent.

Ultimately, to ‘save’ her (there’s that salvation again), Edward shoots venom directly into her heart. Let me repeat that for emphasis: The climax of the entire series is when Edward injects venom directly into Bella Swan’s heart.

Whatever wakes up in that room, it ain’t Bella.

I’ll refer to the vampire as Bella Cullen, the human as Bella Swan.

Bella Swan was clumsy.

Bella Cullen is the most graceful of all the vampires.

Bella Swan was physically weak and frequently needed protection.

Bella Cullen is among the strongest and most warlike of the vampires, standing essentially on her own against a clan that has ruled the world for centuries.

Bella Swan was empathetic to the needs of others before she met Edward.

Bella Cullen pursues two innocent human hikers through a forest, intent on ripping them to pieces to satisfy her bloodlust - and stops only because Edward calls out to her. Not because she perceives murder as wrong. (Breaking Dawn, p.417). She also attempts to kill Jacob and breaks Seth’s shoulder because she didn’t approve of what Jacob nicknamed her daughter (Breaking dawn, p.452). She no longer has morals .

Bella Swan was fairly modest and earnest.

Bella Cullen uses her sex appeal to manipulate innocent people and extract information from them (pp.638 - 461) - she does so in order to get in touch with J. Jenks.

In short, her entire identity - everything that made her who she was - has been erased.

This is powerfully underscored on p. 506, when Charlie Swan (remember, the conscience of the story) sees his own daughter for the first time after her transformation:

“Charlie’s blank expression told me how off my voice was. His eyes zeroed in on me and widened.

Shock. Disbelief. Pain. Loss. Fear. Anger. Suspicion. More pain.”

He goes through the entire grieving process right there - because at that moment, he recognizes what so many readers don’t - Bella Swan is dead.

The most tragic part of the whole story is that this empty shell of a person - which at this point is nothing more than a frozen echo of Bella, twisted and destroyed as she is by her codependence with Edward, fails to see what has happened to her. She ends the story in denial - empty, annihilated, and having learned nothing.

holy shit

now who wants to write fanfiction emphasizing this point

Now that’s cool

Did I just read a Twilight literary analysis that I liked?  

What have I become?

This was so good oh my god. I’m actually so tired of people hailing Twilight as a love story and this was the most accurate thing I’ve ever read on the matter.

omg i really want this mixed with actual gore and horror

*slow clap*

cthulhu-with-a-fez:

busket:

glowdeer:

busket:

y’know if i were mother gothel i wouldn’t tell rapunzel that her birthday was ACTUALLY her birthday. like i’d probably tell her that her birthday was any other day where floating lanterns from the castle do NOT fill the sky and make her think they’re for her. hell whats the point of even telling her that birthdays exist, its not like she’s gonna ever know anyone else besides mother gothel who’ll tell her about birthdays

also what is rapunzel’s real name? is it actually rapunzel; is that what the queen and king named her? if that were the case then mother gothel should have definitely renamed her and had her grow up with a name that is different than the missing princess. like if she got to the town in the movie and heard someone say “this is for the missing princess, rapunzel” she’d be like “holy FUCK”

kiana this is a children’s movie

a man gets fatally stabbed and a woman literally turns to dust as she falls from a 60 foot tower. im talking about birthdays and names so i dont know what the fuck your point is

#my theory about this is that mother gothel’s just conceited #i believe she took rapunzel the day she was born yes? #so it’s not just the kid’s birthday to her #it’s the day she regained use of the magic flower #the day of her victory (via)

rensbogusadventure:

govthookercoulson:

“But we can’t build walls to contain them!”

Moves by truck, train or boat. Ridiculously common. And see those holes on the bottom? Mobile by forklift. Also, HEAVY, even when empty they’re in the tons. If you had some warning you could string these things end to end for miles and human bodies can’t move them. Plus they’re nice and wide so you can comfortably walk on top of them for patrols.

“But we don’t have easy ways to kill them!”

Put the shotgun down you fucking idiot.

No tires to pop. Heavy and slow but inevitable. Climbing required to enter and thus, relatively zombie proof, especially if you spend like an hour to protect the glass.

A lot of large farming equipment can destroy cars.

Want to guess what it’d do to a decaying human body? It’s not pretty.

Now I know what you’re thinking. Merely flattening them with common construction equipment or farming gear isn’t enough.

How about a tree trimmer that can mulch a tree top to bottom in nothing flat?

OM NOM NOM NOM.

“But we need ways to move a lot of people that zombies can’t stop!”

BEEP BEEP MOTHERFUCKER. Deer don’t have a chance and neither does a zombie.

“But that’s not good enough!”

NOW it’s time to call our friend the military because this ride stops for no one.

Do I need to keep going or is it clear the movies are bullshit yet? Seriously a dozen prepared people with heavy equipment licenses could clear an entire street of zombies AND powerwash it after.

Country folk can survive

benepla:

“yikes” is the word equivalent of quickly turning away from a messy situation while raising your eyebrows and taking a sip of your drink

mutantwanda:

i love moviegoing experiences where people clap and cheer because there’s no point to it, the people who made the movie can’t hear you, but people do it anyway because they’re just so moved or excited by the film that they burst into applause even though the only people they have to share it with are each other. that’s nice. 

flawlessastrology:

flawlessastrology:

bogwood-witch:

bittersweetnsours:

schatjetoch:

scalesthegecko:

seductive-cactus:

souupernova:

smol-princely-tree:

spyroforlife:

B)

Last time I did this I got “smol tree” so who wants to give me a new URL idea to consider

NO THE LAST TIME I DID THIS SOMEONE SENT ME LEMONFUCKER AND THATS MY CURRENT INSULT FOR THE PEOPLE I LOVE

im afraid but excited. do your worst.

Fucking do it

yes pls

doo eet

OH PLEASE DO IT.
I HAVEN’T HAD A NICKNAME IN FOREVER GIVE ME YOUR BEST. <3

do ur worst

omg ur guys r so perfect for jody do it for meeeee -molly

HIT ME I’M READY.

priscellie:

cl-hilbert:

The Bechdel:

two or more women talking to each other about something other than a man

The Mako Mori:

at least one female character with her own narrative arc that is not about supporting a man’s story

The Sexy Lamp:

a female character that cannot be removed from the plot and replaced with a sexy lamp without destroying the story.

Chef’s Specials:

The Anti-Freeze:

no woman assaulted, injured or killed to further the story of another character.

The “Strength is Relative”:

complex women defined by solid characterization rather than a handful of underdeveloped masculine-coded stereotypes.

thegoldenstitch:

So that scumbag Martin Shkreli (you know the one who raised the price of an infection fighting aids medication from $13.50/pill to $750/pill a couple of months ago and bragged about it) was arrested today by the FBI on Fraud charges. 

I think we all know what really happened…