‘Hey bastard this store is already closed oh wait you’re hot
never mind please do come in’ AU
‘I’m on the verge of tears because of a rude customer and
you step in and stand up for me’ AU
‘I can feel you silently judging me as you ring up my
purchases I swear I’m not using these for their intended purpose’ au
‘Why does this cost TEN DOLLARS THIS IS AN OUTRAGE’ AU
Hairdresser
AU
‘You’re my
regular customer and I’m in love with the feel of your hair’ AU
“Rumor has
it that you’re a hairdresser with magic fingers and you can fix any bad hair
day so that’s why I’m here’ AU
Gift store AU
‘Why the fuck are you choosing that for a gift to your crush’ AU
‘You walk in and offer to pay me to wrap your gifts’ AU
Florist AU
‘I work as a florist and every day you walk in, buy one flower
and give it to me’ AU
‘I work part-time in a flower shop and you keep asking me about
what this flower means in flower language and I honestly don’t know so you end
up giving me a lesson’ AU
Jewellery shop AU
'You walk in and ask for the most expensive piece are you
loaded to the gills what the fuck man’ AU
‘I’m the employee and this is the first time ever I’ve met
you but you buy me a necklace saying the gem compliments my eyes’ AU
Coffee Shop AU
I write a bad pick up line on your cup every time I’m your
barista’ AU
'You’re the customer and you get back at me for all the
times I’ve spelt your name wrong by mispronouncing my name in increasingly
horrible ways’ AU
'You’re really short and cute and you buy a cup of black
coffee every morning but you make weird faces as you sip it and you never
finish your drink are you trying to look mature or something’ AU
'Should I be concerned about how much caffeine you’re taking
in’ AU
Bakery AU
'Your love of strawberry shortcake really doesn’t match your
appearance but i still think that’s really cute’ AU
'Every morning you walk in and inhale deeply then walk back
out seriously just buy something already’ AU
Drug Store/Chemist AU
'You embarrassedly place your items into the counter so I
call a price check just to make you feel more awkward, but it turns out one of your
items were actually overpriced’ AU
Bartender AU
'You’re the bartender and you catch someone slipping
something into my drink’ AU
‘I ask you to concoct something from all the ingredients on the list i gave you and it
ends up tasting so horrible and wrong that i can’t stop laughing’ AU
Teacher AU
We’re both teachers and at the end of the year we compare how
many gifts we’ve received from students and you’ve won for the past three
years’ AU
'Romeo and Juliet of the math and english dept. in school’
AU
Writer AU
I’m a writer and when it gets close to my deadlines I neglect
taking care of myself so you’ll pop in my house every so often to make sure I’m
doing okay’ AU
Fast food Chain AU
‘You just ordered a smile and I look at you like you’re
batshit insane before bursting out into laughter’ AU
‘You’re an employee and I have a crush on you so when you
hand me the soft serve I accidentally grab it by the ice cream instead of the
cone’ AU
‘We have a free refill policy for soft drink and you’ve
prepared several empty bottles what the fuck’ AU
Corner Shop AU
‘I see you come in here every day to buy the same drink and
one day I leave a message on the bottle’ AU
‘You run in looking really panicked and you ask for 6
gallons of milk why’ AU
Restaurant AU
‘You’re a famous critique and I’m a server and I get so
nervous that I trip and spill the dish all over you’ AU
‘You’ve always been a good cook so I encouraged your start
your own restaurant and seven years down the track you own one of the most successful
businesses’ AU
Idol/Manger AU
‘I’m your manager and holy shit you have crazy fans’ AU
‘You’re an idol and you got the lead role in a romance drama
and you practice at my expense’ AU
‘Can you please act appropriately do you know just how many
of your fuck ups I’ve had to cover up last week’ AU
Firefighter AU
‘You’ve just been saved from a burning building and you’re
begging to go back in to save your pet cat’ AU
“No that’s impossible
how the fuck did you manage to get it to catch fire?!” AU
Sex Line Operator AU
‘I called you because I was curious and wow you have a very
soothing voice can you please sing me to sleep’ AU
‘I have a very
cute neighbour and very thin walls and
one day I call you and err your moans
are very synchronised with my
neighbour’s’ AU
And Finally:
You’re a drug lord and I think I’ve just walked into your
drug den’ AU
Daemon - The only one you’re appropriating is Pullman and by appropriating Pullman you’re upsetting no-one, save possibly the Pope.
Patronus - Wizards everywhere are more than willing to lend you this term and the geekiness is an added bonus. I just read that geeks are sexy, or so the Metro, so, there you go, a patronus is clearly your next ascribed accessory.
just a heads up, if i ever weird you out on any level, too friendly, too flirty, anything at all, i encourage you to be very vocal towards me about it to make sure i dont continue to make you uncomfortable. i dont want anyone feeling like im not someone they can trust and be comfortable around.
Normalize vocalizing discomfort.
Last weekend, a guy that at that point I’d known for about 24 hours called me “darling“. I could tell he didn’t mean anything by it, but I (politely) asked that he not do that because I don’t like it. He looked surprised and got a little defensive - “oh, I call all my friends that!“ “Okay, well I’d still rather you didn’t“ “oh well harumph harumph sorry”
whereas the exchange should have gone
“blah blah blah, darling“
“oh please don’t call me that, I don’t care for that“
“oh I’m sorry, I won’t do that“ CONTINUE CONVERSATION
Normalize vocalizing discomfort.
Yep yep yep. I’ve literally had people give me weird looks because I correct them when they try to shorten my name. My own family members don’t call me by any nickname.
School:
haha there is no need for students to be stressed out about the exams .....,,,,, they r well prepared if they did the 12 hours of homework daily
Students:
if i throw myself down these stairs i have three more weeks to study
reasons i disagree with natasha being on team tony:
her speech at the end of catws saying how the government wasn’t going to arrest any of them bc they need them doesn’t sound like she’s all for superhero accountability
aware of the presence of hydra (possibly in the government) and how that could put registered people at risk
she’s shown little or no trust to the people on team iron man (as opposed to the level of trust she has with clint/steve); trust is a common theme in natasha’s characterization and is an important part of her relationships
not a reason i disagree with natasha being on team tony:
If anyonein California is interested in adopting a dog or a cat, Kerns County Animal Shelter ( one of the most disgraceful shelters in California ) is being shut down. Dogs are being sold for 15$ and cats for 5$ ( all are fixed with shots. )
today there was a “flash mob” set up by the seniors because it was their second to last day so they blasted the macarena over the loud speaker and did the dance in the main lobby but our headmaster knew about it so it wasn’t even funny but whilst walking past the elevator i found out why they really did this so called “flash mob”
You are not screaming into the void in vain. The void is just practicing active listening and wants you to let it all out without feeling like it is judging or trying to speak over you
Let’s play a game. Type the following words into your tags box, then post the first automatic tag that comes up. you, also, what, when, why, how, look, because, never
A cunning vampire door-to-door salesperson who stands in people’s doorways and talks until they can find a convenient moment to drop their pen and the person picks it up and the vampire says oh “Thank you” and the person says “you’re welcome” and the vampire smiles a big fangy grin and steps inside
And that’s this vampire’s modus operandi for decades And then the language starts to change and suddenly millenials have homes and the vampire thanks them and they say “oh, no problem” and the vampire is like ???????????????? this was not the plan
ok so there’s a game me and my friends play called “don’t get me started” and basically someone gives another person a random topic and they have to go on an angry rant about it and it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to us at parties and car rides so I highly recommend playing sometimes with your friends
Here’s a question that no one ever has a good answer for: why are cashiers forced to stand? Who decided people need to stand for 4 hours straight between breaks when they don’t MOVE?
If you find out, let me know so I can punch them.
Good question! It’s actually because cashiers sitting down appears lazy and unproductive to the kinds of customers who would complain about that sort of thing! Americans generally can’t accept when retail people don’t look like their job is excessively hard, so cashiers aren’t allowed to sit. It’s been shown that standing for so long, even on padded rubber mats many cashiers have, has a detrimental effect on the knees.
The American retail atmosphere is very different from most other developed nations. I’ve heard Americans describe grocery cashiers in Europe as “rude” and “lazy” because they get to sit down and they don’t have someone bagging your groceries for you. I’ve seen many Europeans genuinely shocked at how aggressive and in-your-face American retail employees are and even more surprised to learn we’re forced to be that way by our employers. Hired spies called “secret shoppers” are used to assess the quality of service, and at any time if you don’t greet and question every customer, if you don’t constantly have a smile on your face, if you’re sitting down for any reason, you could get fired. It’s a constant system of pomp and circumstance awash in paranoia meant to put us in early graves.
This system is seen as desirable by the people in charge because it ostensibly gets more labour out of people for the same salary and it drives many to quit. It’s much, much cheaper to hire and train new people and use them up than it is to pay the wage of someone who’s been with the company a year or two.
Imagine playing a survival horror game where instead of being a gritty reporter or a single parent or a tortured soul with amnesia, you’re a cat. You live in a haunted house, and it is your job to defend your human/s from harm.
Instead of weapons, you fight with your claws. You jump, you twist, and your meows and hisses have different abilities. But if you make TOO much noise, your human/s hush you, and you can’t continue with your assault until they’ve left you be.
There are various spirits and some are helpful. Ghost mice give you life, ghost crickets give you information, and a former Guardian cat is your guide. You have to succeed where your predecessor failed- finding the source of the haunting and getting rid of it.
And if you don’t succeed, your human dies, and you are left alone.
I love this in particular because the Spring-Loaded Cat is such a horror trope – someone’s in a dark place, something jumps out and scares the dickens out of them, turns out it’s the cat
if you watch enough of these movies you can time the real monster’s subsequent arrival to the split-second
and I always thought “those poor cats, trying so hard to get these stupid people to leave immediately and wait in the car instead of wandering slowly around a dark basement calling ‘hello? is anyone there?’ but they never listen”
so yes, I don’t even like 99% of video games but I would absolutely buy Spring-Loaded Cat: The Game
Okay, but hold on for a second, because this is a serious fucking question.
Bernie is, of course, right – no one SHOULD be subject to criticism like that. But not being subject to intense scrutiny over our appearance is simply not an option for women in professional environments. It just isn’t.
And the thing is, this isn’t a small issue for women. This is an economic issue, it’s an investment-of-time issue, it’s a quality of life issue.
I’ll give you an example, and for this example, I’ll use myself and a mythical dude named Steve. This mythical dude named Steve would be almost exactly like my husband, who also worked at a bank, except not in the big-and-tall section where suits cost so much money you think they were hand-sewn by magical elves.
Mythical dude named Steve and I are both bankers for a bank. Let’s it call it Wagontrain. Just for funsies. We both make a nice round sum of money, say, 50K a year. (We’ll come back to that in a moment, but for the moment let’s assume we both make the same amount of money.)
Let’s even say that Steve and I spend the same amount of money on suits that I did every year, which, again, in my experience, isn’t going to be the case. But let’s just say we’re spending the same exact amount of money on suits.
Now, let’s say that in order to be considered a promotable employee, we both have to maintain a certain level of grooming. For Steve, that’s going to be getting a decent haircut, shaving, wearing deodorant – pretty basic stuff. And if he is decently groomed, even somewhat slightly slovenly, he’s likely to be judged on the quality of work he does.
But me? I’m going to have to – in a professional environment like that, and again in my direct and personal experience – in order to be taken seriously, I’m going to have to maintain a manicure ($15/weekly), get my hair professionally cut, styled, and dyed (when I worked in banking, the prevailing style all of the women got cost about $60 more than a man’s haircut, every six weeks), wear makeup (let’s be generous and call that $25 a month, but that’s pretty generous). I’ll also need to wear jewelry, so let’s give me a jewelry budget of $25 a month also, just for round numbers.
Oh. And let’s not forget shoes. Where Steve the banker will get two pairs of shoes, maybe three if he really likes them, I’ll need to continually buy new pairs of shoes. I don’t really want to, but I am going to be judged if I keep trying to wear the same pair of shoes all the time. Let’s say I only buy 5 pairs in a year, and he buys 3 every two years. Again for the sake of argument, let’s call every pair of shoes $50. So in one year he’s bought 1.5 pairs of shoes, so that’s $75, and I’ve bought $250 pairs of shoes, so I’ve spent $175 more than he has.
None of this is mythical, by the way. This is all based, again, on my personal experience. I’d get coached at Wagontrain for my appearance not being ‘promotable.’ I got sat down by an upper-level female manager and given a walkthrough on professional dress and appearance at the management levels, what they expected to be able to promote me to management
So at the end of that year, I’ll have gotten my hair done 8 times at $60 more than Steve’s haircuts, I’ll have gotten, let’s say 50 manicures (maybe I made a couple of those manicures last more than one week), I’ll have spent my jewelry and makeup budgets as we noted above, and I’ll have bought those shoes.
Wow! I’ve just spent FOUR PERCENT of my GROSS (not net) income on grooming, and more than that, four percent MORE than Steve, just to meet the basic grooming standards that we’re both expected to meet. The standards just happen to be way different and far more strenuous for me.
Now let’s walk that back a little bit more. Let’s assume that instead of us making the same amount, that I make 40K while Steve makes 50K. That’s about 80 percent of 50K - so pretty close to the national wage gap (for white women - remember that Black and Latina women will make significantly less, on average). My grooming standards haven’t changed for this job – we’re just adjusting for my gender. Suddenly that $2000 is 4.4 percent of my income, and again, 4.4 percent MORE than Steve has to spend.
But wait – there’s more. Women in professional environments spend an average of 55 minutes per day on their appearance. Assuming Steve spends 20 minutes getting showered, shaved, and putting on his suit, that’s 35 minutes more per work day.
At 22 working days per month, 12 months a year, 35 more minutes is… ((22 * 12) * 35)/60 = 154 hours of our lives, or, put another way, 6.41 days.
That doesn’t count the hours spent in the salon, the hours spent getting our nails done – and my time in a salon was nothing compared to the investment of time, pain, chemicals and care some of my Black coworkers have to put in, in order to maintain “professional” appearances. That’s something I don’t feel really qualified to speak further on, but I am completely aware that grooming regimens are far more strenuous and costly for women of color than they are for white women.
So, when that reporter is asking Bernie if he thinks it’s “fair” that news focuses more on Hillary’s hair than his, they’re not asking about an unimportant issue where women are concerned. They’re literally asking about an issue that eats 4 percent - at minimum - of our income, and literally almost two percent of the time out of every year we live. Women are judged on their appearance far more than men as compared to the job performance they actually put forth.
That’s an economic and quality-of-life issue, and it affects women at every socioeconomic level differently, but it definitely affects us all.
oh my god okay @all tourists coming to new york for the first time:
street hot dogs should be one dollar, maybe a dollar fifty. anything more than that and theyre swindling you. walk another block and get urself a decently priced hot dog
you dont have to yell “TAXI” when ur tryin to hail a cab, we all know u want a cab, thats why ur sticking ur arm up like a square
seriously. walk faster and in a tighter clump. people have things to do and the sidewalk is not yours to command
thats all please come visit nyc but do it smartly
addendum: nobody here calls it the big apple casually its like the number one way to spot a tourist and could lead to aforementioned overpriced hot dogs
Don’t feel bad if you’re sensitive to negative feedback because apparently after one particular bad review Hans Christian Andersen was found just sobbing while lying face down in the dirt
I’m in fucking danger guys. He wants to take out the amendment that makes immigrants’ children a U.S. citizen and deport those families where the parents are illegal. Please stop supporting him as a joke. Please stop thinking that his racism and sexism is funny. Take this upcoming presidential election serious because now many families are in danger. Please I’m not kidding, I’m scared now of this excuse of a human.
there are 2 sexes but a lot of genders. when a child is born, you have to take care of them as the sex they are because they are uncapable of understanding the difference between all the gender identities. it’s not transphobic or cissexist it’s literally giving the child proper care
