Ok but why do men always talk to you like they’re trying to teach you something?
i learned about this in my comm theory class!!!
basically when men speak they tend to prove status/higher intelligence but when women speak we tend to seek connections! so like for example: when asking questions- women ask questions to know more about their conversation partner, while men see asking questions as showing no knowledge on the topic. So a man would rather talk about something that makes him more comfortable and makes him seem smarter rather than something that makes him look inferior.
ALSO!!! when women are communicating with each other, we often have cooperative/positive “interruptions” like asking questions or saying “oh yeah thats happened to me” or “i know how you feel” to show interest in the conversation/build a connection, but men see these kinds of “interruptions” as hijacking the conversation/making them lose their “status”
I sometimes have to pay for water, but with a phone and some wifi, I get to read whole novels about my favorite characters for exactly zero additional dollars
How goddamn rad is that
all the love to the fanfic authors who make this possible, y'all are the best
I am literally in love with the fact I get to see how my little cousins interact even with a language barrier. On my mom’s side, I have a 3 year old little cousin who only speaks French, and on my dad’s side I have a 2 year old cousin who only speaks Spanish. When they play together it is so funny to see them blabber on and on to each other until one of them hears a word that sounds familiar and then they just repeat that word and nod like they’re totally connecting. Like today the one that speaks Spanish said “Venga a poner los pantalones en la muneca!” and the other heard “pantalones” and was just like “Oui, pantalon!” They’re best friends and it’s the cutest and funniest thing I’ve ever seen.
Remember in 1993 when Jurassic Park was like…the end all, be all of special effects?
not gonna lie that still looks intimately real
I’m still somewhat convinced that someone sold their soul to create the special effects in Jurassic Park because that shit is over 20 years old and it still really, really holds up, better than the stuff in a lot of current movies, even.
Fucking witchcraft, man.
fucking look at this shit though
Literally see this post flying around with a few different responses added to the bottom each time so I’ll say it for this one myself:
THEY ACTUALLY BUILT A GIANT MASSIVELY DETAILED FUCKING ANIMATRONIC T-REX FOR ALL OF THIS THAT’S WHY THE EFFECTS ARE SO GOOD. CAUSE IT AIN’T CGI. AND IT AIN’T GUY IN A COSTUME. IT’S A BIG FUCKING ROBOT DINOSAUR. AND EVERY PART IS DESIGNED TO MOVE. IT COST LIKE HALF THE BUDGET OF THE FILM.
amazing
And they had the film it in small increments, especially in the outdoor scenes, because the rain fall kept soaking into the ‘skin’ of the rex and would slow down and mess up its movements. So they would stop filming and have a crew out there drying off this massive, fake dinosaur, and then they’d start filming again until it was too wet. Repeat until the end of the scene.
They used animatronics and detailed costumes for most if not all of the dinosaurs in the first movie.
The triceratops for instance, was also animatronic.
One of my favorite anecdotes I’ve read on tumblr is how the t-rex robot from Jurassic park would malfunction while it was drying out. How did it malfunction, you might wonder?
Motherfucker randomly started moving.
So apparently if you were on the jp set you would sometimes hear people screaming bloody murder even though they were all well aware that it was a giant animatronic puppet and wouldn’t actually, you know, eat them.
Did not know this, had to reblog for awesome movie history insights.
So, I knew about the animatronics bit but I did not know the raptors were guys in suits and the malfunctioning t-rex sounds terrifying.
And i just googled malfunctioning t-rexand was not disappointed. Apparently in order to put the skin on over the steel frame a guy had to crawl inside thet-rex while it was turned on and glue the skin down. And if somebody turned the t-rex off or the power went out the guy in the t-rex stood a very real chance of getting mangled and killed by the hydraulics.
So of course, the power goes out.
And this guy is still in there gluing the skin down.
Apparently the way to survive getting sheered to death by huge sheets of metal while you’re inside a giant t-rex robot is to curl into a ball and hope for the best.
And this guy hoped for the best and got it.
Some other people on stage pried open the t-rex jaws and glue guy crawled out of its mouth and was totally okay.
you know those people who are just luminous, like they’re so beautiful and everything they do is endearing and all you can do is stare and hope that some of their light hits you someday. maybe it’s not even romantic but they’re just such people, they’re humans, and they’re so beautiful that you cannot make yourself look away
are cafeterias a real thing like do those actually exist in america you just line up and get given gross food and then eat in the same room as your entire school??? if that happened at my school there’d be a riot imagine how loud that would be are cafeterias a myth
Me: *gets anxiety making a phone call*
Also me: *feels completely at ease and downright cheerful wandering around unfamiliar city with only vague knowledge of how to get to where I’m going*
my sister-in-law, who has no kids and does not spend time around children ever, decided she wanted to take my kids on an “outing” yesterday. (she sees them like 4 times a year usually). she took them to some weird historical u.s. military fort museum thing, it’s like a big compound with like 15 buildings enclosed by a fence. anyway my 5-yr-old saw one of those red metal fire alarm boxes on the wall and asked his aunt “what does that say?”
now the correct answer to this question, in my opinion, would be “that is a fire alarm. we only touch fire alarms if there is a fire. if there is a fire, you would pull the handle and it would make a very loud noise so that other people know to get out of the building.”
according to several reliable sources, my sister-in-law’s answer to the question was, “it says ‘pull.’”
so anyway that’s how they managed to evacuate all 15 buildings at the museum and why this is probably their last “outing” for a while.
Relationships are scary and complicated ONLY when you start thinking of your partner as some kind of adversary.
You know how to stop being scared of relationships? Remember that it’s got a goddamn buddy system *built in*. That’s all a relationship IS: “Let’s approach life with the buddy system.”
Check on your buddy. Make sure your buddy doesn’t forget their lunch box on the schoolbus. Hold hands with your buddy so you don’t get lost. If your buddy wants to look at the monkey cage, look at the goddamn monkey cage with them. If you are the one looking at the monkey cage, ask your buddy what they want to do next, and when they want to feed the giraffe, help them find a quarter for the little food dispenser. Be a good buddy, and if your buddy isn’t a good one too, tell the teacher and ask for a new one.
This isn’t fucking rocket science, people.
I have reblogged this before. I will reblog it again. And it’s not just romantic relationships: it’s family members and friends as well.
guys someone talk to me about poe dameron - best pilot in the resistance, top dog, guns-blazing male protagonist - and how he was so kind. how he took an ex storm trooper at face value and with unconditional, immediate trust and even a fierce kind of joy- yeah, you go buddy! fight the darkness. i’m here to help you. i’m here to work with you. i’m not here to take control- we won’t get out of this unless we work together.
how he didn’t treat him with suspicion or macho posturing despite the fact that he’s a top tier pilot and has probably been at war with people like FN 2187 for years. how the first thing he does once they’re out of immediate danger is give him a name, treating him like a person worthy of respect and not like another faceless white mask. how he is patient with a panicking Finn even under the incredible stress of a life or death situation, ensuring he knows what to do and being endlessly positive and encouraging instead of berating him when he falls short.
how he gets out of his jet at the end of the big firefight and sees BB8 and his whole face just lights up. how he unselfconsciously runs to BB8 like a kid, automatically lowering himself to BB8′s level.
how he doesn’t need to be the spotlight, the center of attention. when they gather around the hologram to strategize, star pilot and battle veteran poe dameron shuts up and listens.
how he never has a Trek-reboot Jim Kirk-style playboy sequence, no endless string of girls. not even a hint, and you know they could have stuck it in there if they wanted to. how we never see him treat another being, human or otherwise, with anything less than respect, optimism and good nature. i’m just. i mean. do you realize how significant this is?
you guys, if poe dameron is the future of male protagonists in big action movies, sign me the fuck up.
forreal though also: can we talk about the fact that finn spends so much of the movie being scared. he wants people to tell him what’s going on, he wants help, and at one point, he nearly runs away. but the movie really shows us him deciding to come back, to be brave. where poe shows incredible kindness and goofiness and joy (!), finn gives us an incredible amount of vulnerability and emotional open-ness.
this star wars is extraordinary because of the way it gives us such vivid and such different ways to access masculinity, and they are both established as valid and interesting and good.
ok but. leia knowing exactly who finn was the second poe came in all like “my friend needs to talk to you.” which means that poe TOLD her about finn. like EVERYTHING about finn. liKE
leia: poe! you’re alive! how did you escape the first order? poe: general this stormtrooper named FINN appeared like an angel and he SAVED ME and we flew a TIE FIGHTER together and he is SUCH A GOOD SHOT and he is the DREAMIEST AND THE CUTEST BOY IN THE WHOLE GALAXY and did i mention he SAVED ME leia: … leia [upon meeting finn]: it was incredibly brave what you did and i’m saying this because it’s true but also because poe won’t fucking shut up about it
So I found out this company is helping deaf people to find jobs.
There is an unemployment rate of 70% in the deaf and hard of hearing community. ( I know it might be a skewed figure). But this is just for your information to look up in.
i see so many girls and there’s so many different types of pretty… there’s like the honey, green tea pretty girls that like sitting outside and soaking up the sun…. the dark pretty with black eye make up and wild hair and piercings… the bad bitch pretty with killer highlight and striking style….. the lazy pretty girls with snapbacks and sneakers…. the bookish girls with glasses and sweaters that make your heart melt…. the soft Angel pretty girls who just look as sweet as a peach with soulful eyes…. the cute girls with chubby cheeks and messy hair and it seems like warmth emits from them… girls are so fucking beautiful
Tbh all of these fake stories going around and they’re so obvious but if any of them said “so I work in retail” id be “okay yeah” because the weirdest shit goes down when you work retail. It could say “so I work in retail and today Jesus came in and turned all our water bottles into wine” and I’d be like “shit that’s wild what’d your manager do”
Shout out to all the janitors that clean public bathrooms. Seriously thank you. You make going to public bathrooms a little more bearable when it’s clean. You’re all under appreciated heroes.
I've been trying to write a Deaf character but my dialogue is coming out kind of ... flat. Should I use "said" or "signed" when I'm attributing the dialogue to the Deaf character? How do you even describe someone's tone if they're not speaking? Do hands even have a tone? Help????
Hey anon! So, let’s go over some tips for writing Deaf and Hard of Hearing characters, shall we?
Said or Signed?
Either! “Said” is one of those words that readers don’t even notice, which is a good thing. You know when you’re reading and everything is “moaned Kate” “uttered Chance” “grumbled Lacie”? That’s annoying, and every writing blog will telly you to use those words sparingly. “Said” is just from the verb “to say,” which doesn’t specify whether you’re speaking or signing. Using “signed” can be really useful, especially when you have hearing characters along with the Deaf character. A hearing character may sign something when the Deaf person is in the room, but speak something when they leave, or the Deaf character may use spoken language primarily but sometimes sign. Don’t overuse “signed” though, because that can be just as distracting as “grumbled.” If your Deaf character is signing, you can just say “Alex said.”
ASL Tone
Yes, inflection and tone do exist in ASL! I love it so much it’s so awesome ok here we go.
Facial expressions are used for grammar in ASL for some signs, but are also used for tone. You can easily tell if someone’s angry by their facial expressions, and Deaf people are no exception.
Also, you’ll DEAFinitely (I’m so hilarious) be able to tell someone’s tone by their hand movements. I knew it was possible to yell in ASL, but I didn’t really know how until I was talking about an episode of Grey’s Anatomy with my ASL professor, and it went somewhat like this.
Me: Remember last class, when you told us about that Grey’s Anatomy episode with Deaf characters?
Shannon: Yeah, that was such a good episode! Did you watch it?
Me: I did, it was so good!
Shannon: IT WAS SO GOOD I WAS SO EXCITED APRIL PAYS SO MUCH ATTENTION TO WHAT THE DEAF COMMUNITY ACTUALLY WANTS AND JACKSON IS A JERK
Shannon really yelled, and there was no question about it. Her face absolutely lit up, eyes wide, beaming smile about to crack her face in half, and she actually leaned into her signing with her whole body. When she was praising April, she leaned forward. During the transition to her next point, she sort of returned to leaning back normally. When judging Jackson, she leaned forward again on the word “jerk.” Her signing was still very legible but it was forceful, flowing very smooth and fast. The stress was really put on “pays attention” because that was praise and it was very important, and she really snapped the sign “jerk” and gave it a negative, sharp tone.
In short: yes, signers do very much have tones and inflections – they’re just not communicated via voice. Actually, sometimes they are; my Deaf camp counselor vocalized some signs when she got really excited (which was all the time). She didn’t speak, but she did vocalize a bit.
Writing ASL Grammar
Please please please do not write in ASL gloss!!!!!!!! ASL gloss, if you don’t know, is pretty much a written English form of ASL. If I was to sign “I went to the store yesterday,” the gloss version would be YESTERDAY STORE I GO. That is not something you’re going to want your readers to sift through, as it is neither English nor ASL anymore. It’s jarring to read. Don’t use the grammar of ASL while you’re writing in English. Also, because ASL has expressions that English does not, people may get confused (I highly doubt a non-signer would understand when a Deaf character gets in a sticky situation and the dialog reads “DO-DO-DO”).
Writing A Non-Signer/Beginning Signer
If you’ve got a character who is hearing/raised orally/LDA (Late Deafened Adult) or for whatever other reason is learning ASL later in life and is trying to use it, they’re probably going to get a little stuck. It happens! But how do you write that?
The answer is still not to gloss it. You can use other tips and tricks to make the reader understand that this character is grasping for the right word or expression, or just has completely blanked out! Just remember not to overuse ellipses.
Writing Deaf Characters Interacting
Really, if you’re writing any Deaf/HoH character, it’s important that you are knowledgeable about Deaf culture, mannerisms, etc. Deaf culture is very different from hearing culture. For instance, Deaf people share a lot more information than hearing people do. If a hearing person is late to a meeting, they’ll just say “Sorry I’m late, car trouble.” A Deaf person will say “Sorry I’m late, my car made this weird knocking feeling and then totally died on the highway! I had to call Triple A – what a hassle with VRS, right? – and it took an hour for them to come!”
Another example is my relationship with one of my Deaf professors. Most hearing student/professor relationships are very professional with not a lot of (if any) friend elements. Our relationship is very professional, but she emails me links to articles she thinks I might like, rec’d me a movie about a transgender porn star, and told the entire class the story of her first period. Information sharing is very important in Deaf culture, and conversations within that culture will look different than similar conversations between members of hearing culture.
Also, be sure you’re not having Deaf characters facing away from each other when they’re chatting, or in different rooms. With hearing characters, they can chat while doing the dishes or shout from upstairs to someone downstairs. Deaf characters can still do the dishes and sign at the same time, but it just has different dynamics. Like hearing people can talk with their mouth full, it’s possible to multitask with hand use. Just remember what your characters are up to when it’s time for dialog; if someone’s still in the bathroom with the door shut, now is not the time to ask him where he wants to go to dinner tonight.
All in all, just remember that Deaf people have the same conversations hearing people do – we still talk about how shitty our jobs are and how hot it is outside. We just sign about it. And just like two hearing people are going to have difficulty having a spoken conversation from across a football field, two Deaf characters are going to have difficulty having a signed conversation if someone’s glasses are off or if someone’s juggling their coworkers’ coffees in one hand while fishing for their car keys in the other.
How badly do you think the First Order fears Finn? Do you think they put a hit out on him, because he shows that brainwashing isn’t destiny, that it can be broken, that you can break free, that given half an opportunity 90% of their ranks, the tools they need to maintain control, can–
–change their mind. Strive for something better?
Jedis are terrifying, but they’re born. You either have the force or you don’t. You can kill them and they go away.
But storm trooper with a conscience is a virus that can multiply too fast to stamp out. It makes Finn the biggest threat to the First Order than any Jedi could ever be.
So the thing about that moment near the beginning of Cap 2 where Natasha pulls up in a fucking sweet Corvette–
–well, first of all, I love that Natasha likes driving ridiculous dick cars, because she is clearly having fun with it.
But anyway, I love that the running scene ends with Steve climbing into a totally overkill Corvette driven by a girl who is five foot three inches of pure don’t-underestimate-me badass, because that is Steve. That’s what Steve is. That’s why Steve repeatedly lapping Sam and lampshading it is hilarious instead of mean.
Steve Rogers is a scrappy, sickly little runt behind the wheel of the world’s most souped-up muscle car, and he’s having fun with it, but he’s always uncomfortably aware of the distinction between people complimenting him and people admiring his sweet ride.
I LOVE THE COMPARISON BETWEEN STEVE’S NEW BODY AND NAT’S CAR, THIS IS EVERYTHING I NEVER KNEW I WANTED IN CA:TWS ANALYSIS
even if girls did have pillow fights @ sleep overs why do ppl assume they would be cute/sexy … If we’re pillow fighting it’s going to be a straight up brawl there will b no boundaries. I will try to pillow punt you into the next dimension. I didn’t come here to make friends I came here to win
I actually remember having a pillow fight at a sleepover. I wound up with a bloody nose, one of my friends had a black eye, another a split lip and we broke the clock.
Final damage toll for the two most destructive pillow fights I’ve ever been in.
ONE (me and my best friend, age seven): bruises all around, two black eyes between us, a bite mark (him), mildly sprained wrist (me), broken glasses (me), mild bloody/almost broken nose (him), split knuckles (me, from a run-in with a wall, not his face), and an almost broken stereo set (in need of repairs, so maybe ‘impermanently broken’ would be better).
TWO (around fifteen kids between ages 10 and 16, boys and girls): broken mirror, bruises, one bloody nose, bruised ribs, several sprained wrists and ankles, a broken couch (DO NOT ASK), at least two split lips, and what in retrospect was definitely a cracked femur (mine), among other injuries (none as serious as the femur).
i hate that liberal feminist ideology that if you’re faced w/ misogyny irl you have to say something and if you don’t you’re a Bad Feminist ™ as if talking back to men doesn’t get women attacked, raped, or murdered on a daily basis.
like: “if a man tells you to smile, tell him to fuck off!!” yeah, you know i fucking would kathy but i really don’t feel like getting killed today
And while I do partially mean it in a gratuitous “I want Oscar Isaac singing in Star Wars” king of way, I think there’s a lot to work with.
Poe singing playfully at BB-8, a loose rhythm as he makes up the words on the spot. BB8 beeps along happily.
Poe singing gently, like a whisper, by Finn’s bedside after the destruction of the Starkiller. Finn vaguely remembers the tune weeks later, after he’s woken up and hums it to himself. He doesn’t remember where he knows it from.
Sometimes he’ll sing without quite realizing it while he’s flying. He feels most free when flying, it’s something he can’t quite explain. So imagine that slow smile he has just for himself, and he sings a light melody, maybe something swinging. He only ever sings during non-stress situations, then he is too focused, calling out orders and evaluating the situation. But during drills he will without realizing the rest of his team can hear. Until Jessika starts singing along.
When Rey experiences her first rain on D’Qar, stands still for a moment, closing her eyes before racing out further to let the water soak her. Some of the others with the Resistance look at her strangely while going about their duties, shaking their heads at the girl who watches and waits and is hesitant to ask her many, many questions. Some who know more of where she came from look at her sadly for a lingering moment. Poe sees her and remembers the excitement he had as a small child during the downpours on Yavin 4. He says nothing but stands next to her and starts singing the simple rhymes his parents used to say to him so long ago. She looks confused for a moment, turning to face him and her eyes searching before her face slowly splits into a gentle and radiant smile in the pouring rain.
every time I see a video or gif of Kylo Ren in his mask all I can think of is that interview with Adam Driver and Oscar Isaac where Oscar says that their first day on set was Poe’s interrogation scene and Adam didn’t take the mask off in between takes and would lean in and be like “don’t worry I’m under here it’s me” and my heart fills with so much love
I saw an interview where John and Daisy said he even stayed in character the whole time he was on set, and sometimes you’d hear random shouting and screaming coming from somewhere, and people would just go “oh Adam must have a scene coming up soon”
Like…the actors playing the nopetroopers probably noped away from several of Adam’s rehersals irl before they filmed the scene for the movie.
I’m sorry, this is v serious, but all I took from that was the word ‘nopetroopers’ which I love and will use constantly from now on.
So this whole Rey Mary Sue thing just keeps twigging me (and not just because the whole bullshit, sexist concept of the Mary Sue knots my knickers like nothing else)
Because while this fuckboy opinion is probably motivated from dudes being, well, fuckboys, it may also be mired in them being MEN.
Because like, I and every single female friend I have walked out of Star Wars with absolutely zero doubts that Rey had earned every inch of her scrappy, badass survivor mantle. It wasn’t until dudes online started whinging about the “believability” of it that I even contemplated the issue.
So now, three viewings in, the second two spent ACTIVELY SEARCHING for signs that Rey may have suffered New Powers as the Plot Demands I have this to say:
The moment the film opened on Rey - a young woman living and operating ALONE on a world in which literal survival depends on who can scavenge AND EXCHANGE the most goods for food rations, I’d wager every single woman in the audience went, “Holy shit, this girl is capable as fuck.”
We didn’t even need to see her owning the thugs trying to steal BB-8 to know she could handle herself physically. We looked at her environment, her position in that environment, and we knew that to be where she was - just to have lived as long as she had - she had to know how to fight like whoa.
Because here’s the thing: woman don’t walk through life the way men do. Just living in our world is dangerous enough for a woman - to grow up young, alone and female on a world that would brawl over scraps and sell anything that wasn’t pinned down? That’s fucking terrifying.
Women look at Rey at the beginning of TFA and see every single hard-won year of survival. Every year of losing to fellow scavengers stealing her take before she could trade it. Every year she had to not become the very thing they were trading. Every year she was an easy target. And we see every year she had to fight to make sure she wasn’t one anymore.
That had to take guts, not to mention a healthy aptitude for combat and weapons training. The ability to pick up languages and social niceties on the fly would have been essential because my enemies enemy and all that.
Every single “unrealistic” ability these dudes are wanking on about was obvious as fuck to me within the first fifteen minutes of the movie.
So welcome to the party, boys - this is what it feels like to have to identify with someone outside of your own experience. And hey, who knows, if you take the time to ask why Rey was so capable instead of whining about it, you may just learn something.
I don’t doubt she could fight, speak droid, speak cookie, shoot, or use the force but how the hell does she know how to fix a fucking hyperdrive? I don’t think it makes her a Mary sue or whatever but it is bad writing. when characters have unexplainable abilities for the sake of making the film run more smoothly, it’s bad. I think it’s easy to go in the defensive when men criticise Rey because I do think a lot of it comes from a place of fear and sexism, but taking an unbiased, logical look at her abilities and realizing they may be slightly overblown isn’t sexist. It’s analytical. still, i’d rather see a female character whose overqualified as opposed to a weakling who needs a man to save her every 5 minutes.
How the hell does she know how to fix a fucking hyperdrive?
She… lives on a planet littered with the remains of the galactic war? Remains that include (as shown in the movie) Imperial Star Destroyers and other ships capable of hyperdrive? Remains that she has to scavenge for survival? Remains filled with parts that she’d have to know the function of in order to evaluate their trade worth?? And you don’t think she’s picked up any working knowledge of complex starship engineering in the years she’s done nothing but crawl around inside literal complex starship engineering???
?????????
Even my idiot brother picked up on the fact that Rey could fix ships because she dismantles them for a living. It’s… kind of obvious.
The only thing that gave me pause was how seemingly easy it was for Rey to use the force, having had no prior experience. Especially given that apparently it’s impossible for individuals to uncover latent abilities without training, going by the fact that if there are no active Jedi, everybody thinks the force is some kind of myth.
However, there are two points that can explain this. First, Rey was under extreme duress. Think of it like how mothers get super strength and are able to lift cars if their children are trapped underneath. The rush of adrenaline and self-preservation instincts allowed her to tap into this hidden ability.
Now maybe that alone isn’t enough. Surely Rey has been under extreme duress before, given her back story, and surely other individuals who are force sensitive have been in difficult situations without their powers manifesting. But my second, and most important, point is the fact that Rey had the force being used on her. She was on the receiving end and knew how it felt. From there, she just took what was being used on her, flipped it around and pushed it back.
So, in short, Rey’s prodigy-like manipulation of the force is not some Mary Sue special snowflake situation, it’s merely a demonstration of how humankind’s ability to dig deep and use everything available to them when their life is in danger is how they managed to survive this long in the first place.
Rey had way more training and prep than Luke did in A New Hope. I don’t see people calling him a Mary Sue.
Okay, first off: Anakin winning that race?? no humans ever did it before. He *was* using the force. Just not in a “levitating objects” way. But picking up how to fly complex engines quickly by using battle meditation? Anakin did it at the age of nine. Luke did it when he blew up the death star. It’s like in harry potter, guys. You can use the force subsconciously and not be aware, or rationalise it away. Leia has memories of her mother, even though she was a baby when padme died. In the “Princess Leia” comics, she has a brief force vision of Padme. It’s entirely possible that as a child, Leia had visions of her mother and later interpreted that as memories. Rey having used the force before? To, for exemple, feel opponent’s intentions a second before they hit her? not impossible. A ton of people probably use the force every day in the galaxy, having “bad feelings about this” and stuff.
My pet theory is also this:
Anakin grew up being told that using the force was hard and complex. He picked it up more quickly than other padawans, and even used it unconsciously before being trained, and definitely had to concentrate less than other people to use it, but he still lived in an environment that discouraged using it outside of actual need / battle, so he never developed it as being as much a part of him as, say, his hand. It was still a tool to him. Still something exterior, something hard and complex. Something you achieve, something you “master.”
Luke grew up thinking it was impossible. On Dagobah, Yoda had to show him that it was, indeed, possible to lift his ship before Luke could do it. The restriction on his powers? It was in his mind, people. That’s the key to all this! Luke could do anything that he put his mind to once he realised that it was all possible, and that the only limit was himself and his beliefs! Do or do not, there is no try: it’s literally the most important lesson that Yoda taught him.
Rey? Rey grew up believing it all real. She grew up on crazy stories about jedi doing all sort of cool stuff, probably most of it being grossly exagerated but absolutely awesome. Of course Jedis can mind-trick people into doing stuff! Of course they can call a saber to them and use the force on their ennemies and I don’t know what else! Of course you can just “use the force” to disable a shield, jedis can do anything! Disabling a shield is probably, like, the first thing you learn as a jedi!!!! (that’s not how the force works. But she doesn’t know that! Imagine the stories that get told! Old clone wars propaganda! The negociator and the hero with no fear!!!) so when Rey starts trying to do those things… well it’s like Harry Potter’s patronus in Prisoner of Azkaban. She’s got no mental block, no hesitation. Of course I can do those things, she thinks, I’ve got the force! ergo, it works. The limit is in your mind.
This is exactly what I assumed from minute one and I’m so relieved that it wasn’t just me.
okay but seriously: what if Finn is the revolution
what if the story gets around the barracks in whispers – you know a stormtrooper can’t scratch an itch without everyone knowing – and some of the whispers are horrified (treason, betrayal, a trooper gone rogue) but others are trembling with hope. he wouldn’t kill for them! he stole a ship and they couldn’t stop him and he’s free!
and suddenly the AWOL rate spikes as stormtroopers on assignment see their chance and slip away into the night. I could find my family. I could live a normal life. I never have to hurt anyone again.
but there are a few who stay, too. they cautiously seek out others like themselves. they work out codes and signals. at first it’s just the rank and file, but then a disaffected squad leader tells them about a conversation between officers that he wasn’t supposed to hear. and so the conspiracy spreads.
hardly anyone remembers Finn’s number, but every last one of them knows who he is. he’s the one who got out. he’s the one who wouldn’t kill for the Order.
two years later, when the conspirators seize a capital ship and deliver it to the Resistance, the captain asks if her crew can meet “the stormtrooper who made it out.” He was the first, she explains. We all should have known it was wrong, but he was the one who showed us.
General Organa smiles – it’s too rare a sight, these days – and thinks maybe now he’ll understand just what a miracle he is.
17% of cardiac surgeons are women, 17% of tenured professors are women. It just goes on and on. And isn’t that strange that that’s also the percentage of women in crowd scenes in movies? What if we’re actually training people to see that ratio as normal so that when you’re an adult, you don’t notice?
…We just heard a fascinating and disturbing study where they looked at the ratio of men and women in groups. And they found that if there’s 17% women, the men in the group think it’s 50-50. And if there’s 33% women, the men perceive that as there being more women in the room than men.
I sincerely believe that by 7th year Ravenclaws would just tell the door to their common room to fuck off and it would open for them
Q “Why is a raven like a writing desk?” A “You shouldn’t shove either up your arse.” “…Technically, yes.”
Imagine it, a poor First Year is waiting outside the common room, they can’t answer the riddle in a way to appease the eagle and must wait until someone else to answer it for them. It’s getting late, they’re starting to resign themselves to having to spend the night here.
Suddenly, their saviour comes! It’s a seventh year! Back from a night finishing off their Araithmancy essay in the Library. They look angry, but our poor little first year squares their shoulders, waiting to see what will happen, and hope that they’ll keep the door open for them.
The Seventh Year bangs the handle against the wall, and a slightly disgruntled voice asks the question again: “What is the truth?”
The Student Replies, “The Truth is that I am so fucking sick of all these mother fucking questions about stupid fucking topics like this you bloody fuck-witted bastard. Who in the name of Merlin’s saggy left testicle gives a fucking damn about all this shit anyway? I’ve been working my arse off in the library for the last seven hours now let me the fuck in or, truthfully, I’ll blast my way in and take you with me.”
The eagle knocker tutts, but allows the student entry anyway, and our little first year enters, eyes wide and in shock. They watch the seventh year go up to their bedroom, awe all over their face at their new hero. They did, indeed, learn something that day by waiting for someone to arrive, they learnt that swearing has a magic all of it’s fucking own, and that sometimes it is big and clever to use it.
The only head canon I will ever accept. Its both perfectly witty and fantastically assholish
witty and fantastically assholish… pretty much quintessential ravenclaw traits right there
I feel like I missed my window to do stupid teenager things and stay out all night and jumped straight to being a 55 year old woman who would rather stay home watching tv and falling asleep at 8pm
But what if Anakin isn’t ignoring Kylo Ren? What if that great pull Kylo feels towards the Light is Anakin Skywalker desperately trying to save his grandson from his own fate, the way his wife and son tried to save him?
what if Anakin is literally constantly standing behind Kylo Ren, sputtering with ghostly frustration, going, “No! No! No! Do not do that! Do NOT do that! oh for fuck’s sake.”
This is almost certainly what is actually happening.
“Ben if you skewer my son-in-law with that lightsaber then SO HELP ME”
“Ben Solo your mother is blaming me for this, get your ass home and apologize now or I swear-”
And Yoda and Obi-wan are watching, shaking their heads. “Now you know how we felt,” Obi-wan says.
Yoda agrees: “A bitch, karma is.”
I love this. So many people can just totally see Anakin trying to strangle Ben from the afterlife.
How much of a fuckup do you have to be for ANAKIN SKYWALKER to yell at you for your terrible decision-making?
Kylo Ren is something else.
I’d like to think that half the dead Jedi are sitting in a little audience screaming at Kylo Ren at any given moment, sorta like that scene in Mulan with all the dead ancestors.
“kid, unless you want to join the Severed Hands of Star Wars Club, stop waving that thing around and make yourself a lightsaber that isn’t a giant accident waiting to happen. And by the way QUIT VENERATING MY SEVERED, BURNT-OUT SKULL DO YOU EVEN HAVE THE SLIGHTEST IDEA HOW CREEPY THAT IS, AND IT’S ME SAYING THAT, I am the farthest thing from a role model currently available to you”
Anakin is probably cringing each time he recognizes one of the dumb things he totally did himself. Like, okay, the majority of the people who are dear to me at some point went through the Hot Topic phase, as I did. At the time I thought it was absolutely the best thing ever and anyone who disagreed was a prep at whom my middle finger should be put up, to borrow a phrase, and now from the vantage point of the next century I look back at little me and shake my head. Kylo Ren is totally doing the fascist space opera version of the Hot Topic phase which involves torture and murder and vocoders, and it has got to be hideously embarrassing for his grandfather.
if you’re going to do a Star Wars academia!AU, here are some thoughts:
leia organa has been department chair for about a decade because every time she tries to step down, the department is unable to find anyone else willing to take the job. it was supposed to rotate after two years. she hates it.
han solo goes an leave every other year or so, ostensibly to investigate “new archives” in some sunny, tropical locale
luke skywalker also goes on leave every other year or so, but is actually going to very unpleasant archives and actually is allergic to dust
obi-wan kenobi used to be department chair but now when leia comes by to yell at him that it should be someone else’s turn, he pretends he doesn’t know who this “obi-wan” fella is, he’s totally an RA named Ben
padme is now dean. of everything. they thought you couldn’t be dean of everything, but she totally is. she’s about to retire and there will be one hell of a power vacuum when she goes
her ancient husband anakin has been emeritus for like half of his career. he still teaches grad seminars but usually scares off all the students on the first day. he has one grad he’s mentoring but he’s never letting her leave. she is on her 15th year of grad school.
C3PO is the photocopy code of the department secretary. everyone knows his code, no one knows his name. he complains about the copy machine in every single faculty meeting, but actually deeply loves the thing. he cried when they tried to replace it.
finn is a grad student who did his MA at [real university name redacted to protect the innocent] and was super burned by the competitive atmosphere. it came down to whether he was willing to take funding that had been allocated for foreign languages (and thus end their department) and he couldn’t do it. he had to switch. he has to start from scratch in the new program because they don’t allow terminal MAs here.
rey has been in one of the hard sciences for, like, EVER and has accidentally forgotten to leave her lab for the past month. don’t EVER try to “tidy” her lab. maintenance staff tell horror stories about her.
poe dameron is leia’s favorite postdoc. he lectures for her frequently. he always assigns her book when he does. they spend the first hour just agreeing how great her book is. this happens every time.
Point the first: everyone should insert trash ship of choice, insert all of them, insert them allllllll day erryday.
Point the second: I honestly wanna say that Yoda is the coach of the football team. Some seasons they do great, some seasons there are a buttload of complaints about how “Coach made me carry him around the mall for an hour, how is this training” and “Coach made me sit in the locker rooms in the dark at midnight to confront my fears” and “Coach told me there is no try-out, just do or not do, wtf.”
Point the third: emo goth child went to the local prep school—which luke started a while back and splits his time between there and the uni. The school has its own kennel of therapy dogs on site. Ben got kicked out for trying to start a dogfighting ring. Tried to re-enroll the next year (without telling parents) under a false name. Denied.
Point the fourth: R2D2 is the photocopier that C3PO loves. BB-8 is the espresso machine Poe bought for the faculty lounge that only he can work. Rey, a grad student who should NOT be allowed in the faculty lounge, is called in to make it work if Poe’s not on campus.
I WOULD LIKE 200k WORDS OF THIS AU PLEASE AND THANK YOU
QUICK, EVERYBODY LOOK REAL PATHETIC AT @leupagus! GUS, WE ARE SUCH DEJECTED, DEBASED CREATURES. YOU SHOULD WRITE THE THING FOR ME US.
See you say that you would want this but think long and hard about if you would REALLY want this
