All right, so, those of you who’ve been around long enough may or may not recall that my practice when I hit a round number of followers is to post some original writing (see: Methods of Inheritance and Sabbatical). And I’m coming up on 400, so I’ll be doing that again! But! I have…a lot of original fiction. A lot of original fiction. So I’m going to offer a list of options, and you lot can tell me which one you’d like to see! To vote, you can reply to this post or reblog it, or send me a message, although I’d prefer the ask box over a private message just because it’ll be easier to collate the answers that way. For the novels, obviously, you’d be getting an excerpt, probably 2-5 pages. Any short stories, though, you’d get all of.
Polaris:the revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel (as yet incomplete). Like. There’s more detail, obviously. But that’s pretty much what we’re dealing with there. There are a bunch of LGBT characters and a few superpowers and a revolution, thus: revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel. Tag is here if you want more detail.
Falls the Shadow: my best beloved novel about the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, led by Sam, the Horseman of Death and Antichrist. This one’s complete, but it is H E F T Y at 250K words. I’m editing it down. Tag is here, but no one asks me about it, so there’s not much there. First of a trilogy.
Battalion: the novel where angels happened and fucked everything up, and humans have been fucking them over in response for about 70 years (incomplete). Yep. That’s here, and there is exactly one post.
Stories From the Second War:a triad of short stories technically set in the FtS universe, about Heaven’s war against the Nephilim. Um…they’re dark. The Nephilim are monstrous. But I think they might be some of my favorite writing I’ve done. They are Tell All the Truth (But Tell It Slant) and To Fight Aloud, Is Very Brave (Uniforms of Snow), both from the perspective of the leader of the Nephilim, and The Stillness in the Air (Between Heaves of Storm), from the perspective of her hunting partner. I’d put all three on here as a set, because I think they work best that way.
Deorum (Of Gods): a short story I wrote for that writing class I hated. Jack, the main character, lives in a city populated partly by mortals and partly by the gods of the world’s pantheons–Idunn owns a coffee shop, Apollo teaches art at an elementary school, Ninkasi runs a bar, and dark things live in the woods. Jack attracts more gods than he’s strictly comfortable with, and they all seem to know him remarkably well…. I don’t know if it’s my best work in terms of quality, but I definitely think it’s up there as the most fun. This is about forty pages, so I’d have to post it piecemeal.
So…yeah. Anyone have a preference?
OKAY KIDS.
I have reached 400 followers, but I have a tie, which means that this is SUDDEN DEATH.
Polaris (AKA “revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers”) and Deorum (AKA “Please let Jack sleep”) are tied for the top voted piece. Please vote for your preference, summaries are above.
The votes are in! I will begin posting Deorum today.
All right, so, those of you who’ve been around long enough may or may not recall that my practice when I hit a round number of followers is to post some original writing (see: Methods of Inheritance and Sabbatical). And I’m coming up on 400, so I’ll be doing that again! But! I have…a lot of original fiction. A lot of original fiction. So I’m going to offer a list of options, and you lot can tell me which one you’d like to see! To vote, you can reply to this post or reblog it, or send me a message, although I’d prefer the ask box over a private message just because it’ll be easier to collate the answers that way. For the novels, obviously, you’d be getting an excerpt, probably 2-5 pages. Any short stories, though, you’d get all of.
Polaris:the revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel (as yet incomplete). Like. There’s more detail, obviously. But that’s pretty much what we’re dealing with there. There are a bunch of LGBT characters and a few superpowers and a revolution, thus: revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel. Tag is here if you want more detail.
Falls the Shadow: my best beloved novel about the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, led by Sam, the Horseman of Death and Antichrist. This one’s complete, but it is H E F T Y at 250K words. I’m editing it down. Tag is here, but no one asks me about it, so there’s not much there. First of a trilogy.
Battalion: the novel where angels happened and fucked everything up, and humans have been fucking them over in response for about 70 years (incomplete). Yep. That’s here, and there is exactly one post.
Stories From the Second War:a triad of short stories technically set in the FtS universe, about Heaven’s war against the Nephilim. Um…they’re dark. The Nephilim are monstrous. But I think they might be some of my favorite writing I’ve done. They are Tell All the Truth (But Tell It Slant) and To Fight Aloud, Is Very Brave (Uniforms of Snow), both from the perspective of the leader of the Nephilim, and The Stillness in the Air (Between Heaves of Storm), from the perspective of her hunting partner. I’d put all three on here as a set, because I think they work best that way.
Deorum (Of Gods): a short story I wrote for that writing class I hated. Jack, the main character, lives in a city populated partly by mortals and partly by the gods of the world’s pantheons–Idunn owns a coffee shop, Apollo teaches art at an elementary school, Ninkasi runs a bar, and dark things live in the woods. Jack attracts more gods than he’s strictly comfortable with, and they all seem to know him remarkably well…. I don’t know if it’s my best work in terms of quality, but I definitely think it’s up there as the most fun. This is about forty pages, so I’d have to post it piecemeal.
So…yeah. Anyone have a preference?
OKAY KIDS.
I have reached 400 followers, but I have a tie, which means that this is SUDDEN DEATH.
Polaris (AKA “revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers”) and Deorum (AKA “Please let Jack sleep”) are tied for the top voted piece. Please vote for your preference, summaries are above.
Hey. Sorry to bother you, I see your post about healthcare in POC and women. I'm a med student and I struggle to find resources about that (specially in my language -french-). My school book dont say anything about that. Do you have any tips ? Thanks
Mmmmkay, I don’t really have time right this second to do an appropriately thorough scouring of the internet to find some books or resources for you–which I will do when I’m not writing a thesis, because I should have some resources to reference–and I’m not supremely comfortable giving out how-to-medicine advice, but I will tell you a couple things that have helped me.
The only thing that really works: ask someone. Just do it. Find a doctor or an EMT or whoever is on hand who you trust to answer you, and ask them outright. It works best if you have a justified starting point, something like “Okay, so if that’s how I check for cyanosis on a fair-skinned person, how would I check for cyanosis on a person with dark skin?” (You check the inside of the lip, by the way.) Or “How should this intake procedure be different if my patient is trans?” Or “Should I ask any additional questions about vaccinations/previous illness if my patient is a traveler or immigrant?” Or “What if my patient has a pre-existing disability?” Or “Does this chest examination need to be conducted differently if my patient is a large-chested woman?”
Be polite while you’re doing the asking. More often than not, it’s a problem the other person has noticed too, and it’s not that individual’s fault that humanity has spent 2000+ years screwing itself over on this subject. Also, these questions make people uncomfortable, and being rude will decrease your odds of getting an answer.
Listen to non-doctors in the affected populations. If a woman you know has a laundry list of complaints about not being listened to by a doctor, assume she’s not being histrionic. If you know a black guy who says he was fucked over by the EMTs after he was sideswiped by a car or fell from a ladder or spiked a 105 F fever (40.5 C), he doesn’t need an MD to know he wasn’t treated as well as he should have been. If you know a trans woman who was repeatedly referred to as ‘he’ in the hospital, take note. Decide not to be that kind of doctor, and then pay attention to how you act.
Listen to the nurses around you. First of all, that’s a good general rule, the nurses probably know more than you and nurses are treated terribly by a lot of doctors. Behind every successful doctor is a whole host of nurses who probably haven’t been thanked.
But moreover, nurses spend a lot of time with the patients, and they’re the ones who field complaints about the doctors. They’ll know who gets fucked over and who doesn’t, and they know all the secrets to the medical trade.
Be attentive to your patient (unfortunately this is the ‘learn on the job’ part of the answer). If a woman expresses discomfort with the normal proceedings of an examination, listen to her. If a patient prefers name and pronouns not matching those on their legal documentation, adhere to their request. Be aware that there are some conditions which are more common in people of specific ethnicities–for example, black women have a higher incidence of breast cancer and a lower statistical chance of having it caught by a doctor than a white woman.
Ultimately, I’d say decide what kind of doctor you want to be. If you’re already asking this question, that’s a good start, and telling about how you’ll act as a doctor. Be self-aware of how you act with patients of various genders, ethnicities, etc. In a perfect world, it would be the responsibility of the medical school to teach that behavior and ensure that all the students were able to treat people other than the cis white able-bodied male ‘standard patient.’ This is not a perfect world, and that means it’s on you.
I…feel like this was pretty unhelpful and round-about, but I hope it at least gave you a starting place? I think you’re doing great because it occurred to you to ask this question, keep it up.
Before entering, ensure that someone not entering knows you are going in, and when you expect to be out
Before entering, determine the cause of your mission- your mission objective. Bookcase? Couch? Oven? Meatballs? Figure it out
Upon entering, locate The Path
Do not disengage from The Path until you have reached your mission destination. Many have been lost forever to the wilds of IKEA by not obeying this. Very few are ever located again by the sparse store employees.
Upon reaching your mission destination, you may disengage from The Path ONLY when accompanied by your partner (physical contact should be maintained- ie, holding hands, holding shirt sleeve, both holding an end of a rope, etc)
When you disengage from The Path to acquire the data for your mission objective (ie, the item number for the bookcase, couch, meatballs, etc), it becomes your partner’s responsibility to maintain visual contact with The Path. Much like weeping angel statues, The Path will move if not actively being watched. This will strand you and your partner in the wilds of IKEA, so ensure you choose a partner wisely.
Upon acquiring the mission objective data (ie the item number), navigate back to The Path. You may disengage physical contact with your partner once you have safely returned to The Path
Do not leave The Path again. It will naturally end at the warehouse/stock section. This is a long, huge hall with many branches.
At the entrance of the warehouse section, acquire a cart if necessary. Using your item coordinates, locate your mission objective. Do not leave the main hallway except for the branch where your item is located. Like The Path, the wilds of IKEA sometimes sneak up on travelers that wander the warehouse section
Once your item has been loaded, head to the check out section. Do not touch anything in the boxes along the way. They appear to be full of candles or stuffed animals or useful kitchenware; it is a ruse. They are carnivorous.
After checking out, exit to the loading area. Load your item, and leave.
Do not look in your rearview mirror as you leave. It shouldn’t pursue you if you don’t look back.
I think my favorite panic-fueled response to a petitioner was when someone came up to me in Union Square and said “Hi, would you care to sign our petition for LGBT rights?” and I just blurted out “I’m already gay” and the person, taken aback, said “Well, that’s… nice.” and I said “It really is. Goodbye.” and just walked into the closest store to escape.
one time I was on my way to a final and this clipboard person was aggressively trying to stand in my way and saying “excuse me sir, can you take just one minute?” and I was like “I’m sorry I’m on my way to a final” and they said “just takes a minute to save a mountain” and I panicked because clearly the truth of why I had to go wasn’t working so I just said the first thing that came to mind which was “Sorry I hate mountains”
This is maybe my favorite response to this post, holy shit.
Random Headcanon: That Federation vessels in Star Trek seem to experience bizarre malfunctions with such overwhelming frequency isn’t just an artefact of the television serial format. Rather, it’s because the Federation as a culture are a bunch of deranged hyper-neophiles,
tooling around in ships packed full of beyond-cutting-edge tech they
don’t really understand. Endlessly frustrating if you have to fight
them, because they can pull an effectively unlimited number of bullshit
space-magic countermeasures out of their arses - but they’re as likely
as not to give themselves a lethal five-dimensional wedgie in the
process. All those rampant holograms and warp core malfunctions and
accidentally-traveling-back-in-time incidents? That doesn’t actually
happen to anyone else; it’s literally just Federation vessels that go off the rails like that. And they do so on a fairly regular basis.
So to everyone else in the galaxy, all humans are basically Doc Brown.
Aliens who have seen the Back to the Future movies literally don’t realise that Doc Brown is meant to be funny. They’re just like “yes, that is exactly what all human scientists are like in my experience”.
THE ONLY REASON SCOTTY IS CHIEF ENGINEER INSTEAD OF SOMEONE FROM A SPECIES WITH A HIGHER TECHNOLOGICAL APTITUDE IS BECAUSE EVERYONE FROM THOSE SPECIES TOOK ONE LOOK AT THE ENTERPRISE’S ENGINE ROOM AND RAN AWAY SCREAMING
vulcan science academy: why do you need another warp core
humans: we’re going to plug two of them together and see if we go twice as fast
vsa: last time we gave you a warp core you threw it into a sun to see if the sun would go twice as fast
humans: hahaha yeah
humans: it did tho
vsa: IT EXPLODED
humans: it exploded twice as fast
I love this. Especially because of how well it plays with my headcanon that the Federation does so much better against the Borg than anyone else because beating the Borg with military tactics is nigh-impossible, but beating them with wacky superscience shenanigans works as long as they’re unique wacky superscience shenanigans.
Yeah, I love this.
Reminds me of the thing I wrote a while back about Humans in high fantasy realms - they’re basically Team Fuck It Hold My Beer I Got This.
Impulsive, passionate to a fault, the social structures they build to try and regulate this hotheadedness ironically creates even greater levels of sheer bull-headedness. Even their “cooler” heads take action in months or weeks.
All their great heroes of the past were impossibly rash by galactic standards. Humans Just Go With It, which is their great flaw but also their greatest strength.
klingons: okay we don’t get it
vulcan science academy: get what
klingons: you vulcans are a bunch of stuffy prisses but you’re also tougher, stronger, and smarter than humans in every single way
klingons: why do you let them run your federation
vulcan science academy: look
vulcan science academy: this is a species where if you give them two warp cores they don’t do experiments on one and save the other for if the first one blows up
vulcan science academy: this is a species where if you give them two warp cores, they will ask for a third one, immediately plug all three into each other, punch a hole into an alternate universe where humans subscribe to an even more destructive ideological system, fight everyone in it because they’re offended by that, steal their warp cores, plug those together, punch their way back here, then try to turn a nearby sun into a torus because that was what their initial scientific experiment was for and they didn’t want to waste a trip.
vulcan science academy: they did that last week. we have the write-up right here. it’s getting published in about six hundred scientific journals across two hundred different disciplines because of how many established theories their ridiculous little expedition has just called into question. also, they did turn that sun into a torus, and no one actually knows how.
vulcan science academy: this is why we let them do whatever the hell they want.
I want to talk about my twinswap AU right now but I can’t feel assed to ramble about the whole thing. God dammit. I guess I will just mention a few things Tori can do in it. He can dance to utilize master runes. So fire-leaping techniques can lead to suddenly EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE. Life in the Master’s house has made him somewhat more accepting of what he can do and so he solves a lot of problems via sleeping. The world is on fire around him and no sorry the Highlord’s “sister” needs a nap. Goodnight. As That-Which-Creates’ avatar on Rathilien he is creating a tradition of Highborn ladies who know Senethar. Lyra Lackwit was his first student. He knows the intricate stitch based language of the Women’s World and in general is far more successful at being a lady than his sister is in canon.
(caps credited to @xtokyoshinjuu, except for one kinda shitty one of Shiro’s hand taken by me)
so something that’s been bothering me for ages is why on earth takashi shirogane, who was a prisoner of the galra, has such an incredibly badass weapon installed as a limb by his captors.
More specifically: why is he able to use this arm against the Galra at all?
We don’t know much about Shiro’s arm, as Shiro himself doesn’t remember its installation or what it’s even capable of until most of the way through the first episode. What we do know is:
it’s the work of the druids, which seem to be the Galra magicians, of which Haggar is one
it has incredible cutting force, to the tune of cutting holes into ship hulls that are six inches thick
it can act as a power source for galra tech
it grants shiro access to lots of galra information and passage through locked doors
This is a ridiculously powerful weapon.
there’s a lot fan theories floating around about him being intended as a double-agent, about his being brainwashed into being a galra soldier, etc etc - and these are all really great theories with a lot of canon evidence to back it up. Haggar outright states he ‘could have been [the Galra’s] greatest weapon’, so he was never meant to just be gladiator entertainment. How far that ended up going, we just don’t know.
But let’s rewind for a second. Even if Shiro was brainwashed or mind-controlled into being a force of evil for the Galra, did they seriously gift an unknown alien with this incredibly powerful weapon installed into his body and just trust him to never use it against them? Because it’s obvious throughout the series that the Galra have no way to stop Shiro from using his arm as he pleases. He faces off directly with Sendak and Haggar and neither of them have any way to remotely or otherwise turn off his arm (and it’s implied that Haggar is the one that gave it to him).
the short answer is: no, of course they didn’t.
The long answer is: Shiro’s arm was probably granted a lot of cool shit in exchange for doubling as a shock collar - but something lets Shiro overpower its effect in episode 1.
The first time Shiro’s arm does the Glowy Thing is most of the way through episode 1, when Shiro and Pidge are about to fight some Galra soldiers.
Which is a total (unpleasant) surprise to Shiro, because it causes him so much pain that he falls to his knees.
(save him! D:)
okay, but take a look at that weird black-purple energy around his hand. What the hell is that?
Well: we don’t know. Shiro fights it for a few upsetting seconds and then he seems to get control and straighten his hand; the black stuff dissipates.
And Shiro gets up and kicks Galra android ass.
(and back to where this post started.)
This never happens again. Shiro is able to activate it at will from this point onwards, and it never appears to hurt him to do so. Importantly, it also never activates against Shiro’s will.
This first time is an aberration:
his arm activates without Shiro actively willing it and
it hurts him when it does.
I think we’re seeing the arm’s secondary function in action: specifically, it’s acting as a shock collar. When Shiro goes to fight his Galra captors, the arm activates on its own and causes him pain, incapacitating him and leaving Shiro defenseless against being subdued.
However, whatever was causing the arm to activate against Shiro’s will is something Shiro is able to fight against and, in this moment, finally break (as represented by the black energy around his hand). Also, the delightful irony is that if the arm did not have this shock collar effect, Shiro might not have ever realized what his arm was capable of. His memories are still largely fragmented.
In conclusion: In ep 1, I think Shiro broke the safety lock on his Galra arm, and the Galra spend all of season 1 paying for it.
(also we should all appreciate that Shiro was prepared to go up against several galra android soldiers with nothing but his bare fists, as he had no idea about his Extra Features. What a guy.)
What do you think about albus dumbledore?do you believe he is borderline abusive
Not. Even. Remotely.
I should warn people that I have absolutely no chill on this subject. Dumbledore haters piss me the fuck off, because for the most part they clumsily glue tumblr style social justice style discourse over the Harry Potter story and ignore what actually happened in the books. And they tend to be the same people who hate JKR and aren’t shy in expressing it. Dumbledore hate makes me feel sick.
The fact that Dumbledore loved Harry very, very deeply leaks out of every pore of the text. You have to be willfully blind to miss it. He was in a horrific position: set this boy on the path to destroy Voldemort or let Voldemort win. You need to make bloodless choices in a position like that. You need to keep a certain distance, or emotion will make you screw up. As it did when Dumbledore didn’t give Harry as much information as he needed during OotP, and as Dumbledore admitted. He was flawed, he struggled, but he was ultimately incredibly strong.
He had no choice but to leave Harry with the Dursleys, because Harry needed Lily’s blood protection (which saved Harry’s life in the end). Additionally, knowing that Harry was destined to die and that he was going to have to usher him along that path made him want to keep an emotional distance. Which you cannot blame him for. He couldn’t let himself get attached. Love, for Dumbledore, always ended in disaster. And yet, once he met Harry and watched him, he couldn’t help himself. It says this right in the text and there’s no reason to think Dumbledore was faking it.
People call him cold, uncaring, but he was never cold with Harry. He was always gently supportive, he praised him when he succeeded, he counselled him when he was grieving. He let Harry learn on his own and make his own choices, because it was vital to Harry’s eventual task. Harry knew that in the end.
On another literary and thematic level, Harry’s relationship with Dumbledore is meant to evoke humanity’s relationship with God. God is meant to be all knowing and all powerful, he’s meant to love us, and yet we’re all destined to die and go through the agony of losing people we love along the way. We’re meant to be good people, to make the right choices, when God is distant, seemingly absent, and allows horrible suffering in the world. How do we come to terms with that?
I am not a religious person, so I can substitue fate or biology or nature or whatever forces govern the universe for “God” and it still works. It still poses the same questions, the same challenges.
And I know I’ll get hate for saying this. Because the discourse imposes this innacurate stereotype of “abusive manipulator” over Dumbledore and people jump from that to “Omg you’re supporting abuse if you don’t hate him!”
I’m honestly so scared by how many Americans I see who are going to vote third party in the election.
Listen you privileged fucks that’s exactly the same kind of bloody statement voting that got us more of the Tories here in Britain.
Take it from someone who knows; don’t fuck up your government by letting Trump win. I would let Hillary Clinton spit on me before I’d let that monster anywhere near the oval office.
when millennials were first heading into high school and college there was a huge trend in news stories about how stressed out our kids are, how their backs are getting messed up from carrying so many books, how they’re sleeping less and doing more school work, and how we should do more to help our kids have the childhoods we had because our kids are falling apart from stress and being forced to be more productive than kids should be. but then once millennials started hitting the workforce all the news was about how millennials are lazy and narcissistic and entitled lmao you were real concerned about us until you found out a 23 year old is more qualified to do your job than you
I work in a decent sized, local, indie bookstore. It’s a great job 99% of the time and a lot of our customers are pretty neat people. Any who, middle of the day this little old lady comes up. She’s lovably kooky. She effuses how much she loves the store and how she wishes she could spend more time in it but her husband is waiting in the car (OH! I BETTER BUY HIM SOME CHOCOLATE!), she piles a bunch of art supplies on the counter and then stops and tells me how my bangs are beautiful and remind her of the ocean (“Wooooosh” she says, making a wave gesture with her hand)
Ok. I think to myself. Awesomely happy, weird little old ladies are my favorite kind of customer. They’re thrilled about everything and they’re comfortably bananas. I can have a good time with this one. So we chat and it’s nice.
Then this kid, who’s been up my counter a few times to gather his school textbooks, comes up in line behind her (we’re connected to a major university in the city so we have a lot of harried students pass through). She turns around to him and, out of nowhere, demands that he put his textbooks on the counter. He’s confused but she explains that she’s going to buy his textbooks.
He goes sheetrock white. He refuses and adamantly insists that she can’t do that. It’s like, $400 worth of textbooks. She, this tiny old woman, bodily takes them out of her hands, throws them on the counter and turns to me with a intense stare and tells me to put them on her bill. The kid at this point is practically in tears. He’s confused and shocked and grateful. Then she turns to him and says “you need chocolate.” She starts grabbing handfuls of chocolates and putting them in her pile.
He keeps asking her “why are you doing this?” She responds “Do you like Harry Potter?“ and throws a copy of the new Cursed Child on the pile too.
Finally she’s done and I ring her up for a crazy amount of money. She pays and asks me to please give the kid a few bags for his stuff. While I’m bagging up her merchandise the kid hugs her. We’re both telling her how amazing she is and what an awesome thing she’s done. She turns to both of us and says probably one of the most profound, unscripted things I’ve ever had someone say:
“It’s important to be kind. You can’t know all the times that you’ve hurt people in tiny, significant ways. It’s easy to be cruel without meaning to be. There’s nothing you can do about that. But you can choose to be kind. Be kind.”
The kid thanks her again and leaves. I tell her again how awesome she is. She’s staring out the door after him and says to me: “My son is a homeless meth addict. I don’t know what I did. I see that boy and I see the man my son could have been if someone had chosen to be kind to him at just the right time.”
I’ve bagged up all her stuff and at this point am super awkward and feel like I should say something but I don’t know what. Then she turns to me and says: I wish I could have bangs like that but my darn hair is just too curly.“ And leaves.
And that is the story of the best customer I’ve ever had. Be kind to somebody today.
I’ve been reading a great deal about the beyond unreasonable cost for the current main brand of Epi-Pens. I’d like to offer an alternative to those who simply cannot or perhaps will not pay such an exorbitant amount. Have your doctor write out your prescription (Rx) for Adrenaclick but sign “Substitution Allowed”, have the pharmacy order the generic of it from Lineage Therapeutics.
The cost for these Epi-pens is $10 from Costco currently. Same pen, same medical chemical, but more reasonable price. Stay safe out there.
I hear you like mutant aus. I propose: Stranger Things Mutant Au
New system, kiddos: when I’m depressed,
I’m going to write mutant AUs, because mutant AUs are good. This is the decree. If you want to see a specific one, send me an
ask. Also, ha, spot my favorite character, because I’m a fucking unsubtle trainwreck of a writer.
No one has mutant abilities
at the beginning, you see. Mutants are
the stuff of comic books and stories, like Superman or magic or the
Demigorgon. So it’s four kids playing
Dungeons and Dragons and four teenagers trying to figure out how to game the system
enough to survive high school and a pair of adults fighting to keep their heads
above water, and they are all—for a given value—perfectly normal.
And then things start to happen.
And Eleven…well, she has a whole host of mutant powers, kickstarted by
the drugs her mother took or by the experiments done on her or by the Upside
Down. Telekinesis, radio wave
manipulation, dimensional travel—the whole gamut.
fandom is so weird you never know how old anyone is but you just kinda assume most of them are around your age until proven otherwise and then one day someone is talking about their 9 year old kid on your dash and another person is saying they just finished 10th grade. wild.
did anyone actually ever read those animorph books
just stared at the covers for a concerningly long amount of time before putting it back where i found it
me too
Same
Here are some of the spoilers you missed out on by not reading Animorphs:
Five children are forced to engage in guerilla warfare, espionage and repeated murder to protect their loved ones from alien parasites as they wait for the other, heroic aliens to finally arrive. When they do, the “good” aliens turn out to not give a shit about humans, caused the whole intergalactic war through their own shittiness and are willing to exterminate whole planets themselves to get at their hated enemies.
A child repeatedly experiences his intestines hanging out of his body while in various animal forms
A child is mentally tortured until broken and never gets better
A child in the form of a fly experiences getting splattered and smeared against a ceiling until his friends who are also flies at the time can peel his body off and take him somewhere he can transform back into a whole human before his insect mind fades completely
A child is shrunken and experiences having her eyeballs digested out of her head inside her friend’s stomach while she’s in the form of a tiny elephant
The heroes are forced to permanently imprison another child in the body of a rat because he knows too much and they abandon him on a tiny island with only other rats and garbage for company. Rumors circulate that the island is haunted but it’s actually his psychic screams reaching distant boaters.
A race of devastatingly powerful, violent aliens turn out to be mental toddlers who don’t know what they’re doing and are just bred to think they’re playing one big game before they’re killed at age three so they don’t learn the truth
An alien spends a few centuries hanging from the parasitic tentacle of a much bigger alien, surrounded by millions of rotting corpses attached to its other moon-spanning tendrils. They engage in mental warfare until one finally absorbs the other completely.
It turns out another seemingly “evil” alien race is simply driven to kill and eat everything in sight because it was separated from its original world where food was continuous and the entire specie’s life is the torture of perpetual starvation
A peaceful robot willingly removes its inhibition against violence to help in the war, only to slaughter a huge number of alien-controlled humans so gruesomely that nobody dares think about or speak of it again and it is the only thing left undescribed in a book series that already describes entrails getting torn out and skulls getting smashed
A child stays too long in the form of a flea and instead of turning back into a human, accidentally turns momentarily into one big, giant flea that can only writhe and moan because it shouldn’t exist and can’t live at that scale.
The kids discover Atlantis, then discover that Atlanteans are inbred mutants who paralyze any humans they find, dissect them alive to figure out how their organs work, then stuff the corpses as kitschy museum displays for their children.
An ordinary ant gets transformed into a human child. It has no idea what’s happening and is so overwhelmed by its huge new brain and sensory input that it can only scream until it dies
What. The. Fuck
From someone who recently read/finished this series, NONE OF THE ABOVE IS AN EXAGGERATION.
Everybody read some animorphs you know you wanna it’s right there
Go ahead and start on book one you’ll already get some juicy terror
Let’s not forget 5 of them are almost eaten alive by ants. For one of them, this happens twice though she doesn’t remember, because it happened in a weird aborted time line where they all die.
I would like to add that I am taking notes this time around and I discovered that the very first murder of a named character (it’s rather grisly, he gets eaten alive and his scraps snatched up by the above eternally-starving aliens, while the protagonists try not to get caught and murdered a handful of feet away) occurs less than 40 pages into the first book. Also, the first dismemberment happens less than four books in.
tall people: if we are walking together please take into consideration my tiny legs. i cant keep up with you. please think of my tiny legs i dont want to be jogging to keep up with your leisurely stroll you TITANS
Just get a pair of roller skates and hang on to my sleeve, we don’t have all day.
[Image: Patty Tolan and walking and hauling Jillian Holtzmann behind her on roller skates.]
i’m concerned about boys with mental illnesses and eating disorders and abusive relationships and sexual assault survivor stories and self-harming tendencies who never get the attention or care or help they need because all of those things “don’t happen to men” or because “all men are horrible monsters” and i just wanna say if you’re a boy and you’re struggling with something hard, your gender doesn’t diminish or dismiss your struggles or make them any less significant or difficult and i love you and i’m here for you
So apparently Target is selling small cards against humanity expansion packs! They have fantasy, WWE, etc. but most importantly…
the retail pack.
now look at this:
this says i get an instant 1$ rebate. and it’s on the inside. that mean i get a dollar back instantly! now just how exactly did they do that?
they put a dollar inside. a literal actual dollar. imagine my reaction when i saw a dollar inside of this little package, cause it was literally the first thing i saw.
When i saw the post that said they hid a card inside the lid of the ‘bigger blacker box’ i was a bit skeptical.
I am no longer skeptical.
the people that make this game are absolutely ridiculous.
(btw, the pack cost 4$. 3$ if you count the dollar you get back)
Always believe whatever Cards Against Humanity say when they tell you something about a pack. These are the people who sold literal Bullshit on Black Friday back in 2014.
…………………reblog this and say something nice about the person u reblogged it from because there’s too much hate on my dashboard right now and its making me upset so lets start a chain of love
me showing up to my 6 year old self:
hey kid wanna know the future
six year old me:
ok
current me:
in the year 2016 a reality tv star is running for president, you can play pokemon in real life with these commonplace tiny portable computer phones, and episode 7 came out and it has a girl jedi
All right, so, those of you who’ve been around long enough may or may not recall that my practice when I hit a round number of followers is to post some original writing (see: Methods of Inheritance and Sabbatical). And I’m coming up on 400, so I’ll be doing that again! But! I have…a lot of original fiction. A lot of original fiction. So I’m going to offer a list of options, and you lot can tell me which one you’d like to see! To vote, you can reply to this post or reblog it, or send me a message, although I’d prefer the ask box over a private message just because it’ll be easier to collate the answers that way. For the novels, obviously, you’d be getting an excerpt, probably 2-5 pages. Any short stories, though, you’d get all of.
Polaris:the revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel (as yet incomplete). Like. There’s more detail, obviously. But that’s pretty much what we’re dealing with there. There are a bunch of LGBT characters and a few superpowers and a revolution, thus: revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel. Tag is here if you want more detail.
Falls the Shadow: my best beloved novel about the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, led by Sam, the Horseman of Death and Antichrist. This one’s complete, but it is H E F T Y at 250K words. I’m editing it down. Tag is here, but no one asks me about it, so there’s not much there. First of a trilogy.
Battalion: the novel where angels happened and fucked everything up, and humans have been fucking them over in response for about 70 years (incomplete). Yep. That’s here, and there is exactly one post.
Stories From the Second War:a triad of short stories technically set in the FtS universe, about Heaven’s war against the Nephilim. Um…they’re dark. The Nephilim are monstrous. But I think they might be some of my favorite writing I’ve done. They are Tell All the Truth (But Tell It Slant) and To Fight Aloud, Is Very Brave (Uniforms of Snow), both from the perspective of the leader of the Nephilim, and The Stillness in the Air (Between Heaves of Storm), from the perspective of her hunting partner. I’d put all three on here as a set, because I think they work best that way.
Deorum (Of Gods): a short story I wrote for that writing class I hated. Jack, the main character, lives in a city populated partly by mortals and partly by the gods of the world’s pantheons–Idunn owns a coffee shop, Apollo teaches art at an elementary school, Ninkasi runs a bar, and dark things live in the woods. Jack attracts more gods than he’s strictly comfortable with, and they all seem to know him remarkably well…. I don’t know if it’s my best work in terms of quality, but I definitely think it’s up there as the most fun. This is about forty pages, so I’d have to post it piecemeal.
Reading the iliad is so crazy because like alexander the great was reading this story over 2000 years ago?? he probably wrote fanfiction about achilles and patroclus and told hephaestion his headcanons?? life is absurd
HE DID THO. HE ACTUALLY DID.
ALEXANDER THE GREAT WAS HELLA GAY AND WROTE GAY FANFICTION OF THE GAYEST PEOPLE IN ANCIENT GREECE.
I’m not even kidding. Achilles and Patriclus were hella gay Ancient Greek warriors; like the Illiad (the number one source for all things Greek) has half the book dedicated to their relationship.
Alexander the Great wrote 57 papers about them. HE WROTE 57 ESSAYS ON THEIR LOVE FOR EACH OTHER AND WHAT HE THOUGHT THEY WOULD DO IF THEY LIVED IN HIS TIME PERIOD.
ALEXANDER THE GREAT WROTE MODERN AU GAY FANFICTION
And it gets EVEN GAYER
He constantly refers to himself and his “guy pal” Hephaestion as having the same relationship as Achilles and Patroclus
He literally talks about how he and his best friend were like WELL KNOWN ANCIENT LOVERS.
Don’t think it can get gayer? THINK AGAIN
Alexander and Hephaestion visit the graves of Achilles and Patroclus and laid down flowers in honor for them, stripped naked, and ran a race in their honor. After words they SENT THEIR SERVANT AWAY TO SPEND THE NIGHT ALONE AT THE MEMORIAL.
This isn’t a myth, this is actual documented history. It’s all true. I don’t have sources because I learned about this a few years ago in my history class in college but google it I promise you.
Wow, 57 essays. Alexander must have had a lot of free time on his hands.
The reason you don’t have sources is that this didn’t happen.
I TOOK 15 MINUTES
Cartledge, Paul. Alexander the Great: The Hunt for a New Past. Woodstock, NY; New York: The Overlook Press, 2004
Wilcken, Ulrich, Alexander the Great, W. W. Norton & Company; Reissue edition (March 1997)
~follow for more soft historical homosexuality~
Alexander the Great lived in a time when travel was slow and he got to travel in a carriage, meaning he didn’t have to worry about controlling a horse. He had plenty of free time to read and write, there was little else to do on long carriage rides.
All right, so, those of you who’ve been around long enough may or may not recall that my practice when I hit a round number of followers is to post some original writing (see: Methods of Inheritance and Sabbatical). And I’m coming up on 400, so I’ll be doing that again! But! I have…a lot of original fiction. A lot of original fiction. So I’m going to offer a list of options, and you lot can tell me which one you’d like to see! To vote, you can reply to this post or reblog it, or send me a message, although I’d prefer the ask box over a private message just because it’ll be easier to collate the answers that way. For the novels, obviously, you’d be getting an excerpt, probably 2-5 pages. Any short stories, though, you’d get all of.
Polaris:the revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel (as yet incomplete). Like. There’s more detail, obviously. But that’s pretty much what we’re dealing with there. There are a bunch of LGBT characters and a few superpowers and a revolution, thus: revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel. Tag is here if you want more detail.
Falls the Shadow: my best beloved novel about the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, led by Sam, the Horseman of Death and Antichrist. This one’s complete, but it is H E F T Y at 250K words. I’m editing it down. Tag is here, but no one asks me about it, so there’s not much there. First of a trilogy.
Battalion: the novel where angels happened and fucked everything up, and humans have been fucking them over in response for about 70 years (incomplete). Yep. That’s here, and there is exactly one post.
Stories From the Second War:a triad of short stories technically set in the FtS universe, about Heaven’s war against the Nephilim. Um…they’re dark. The Nephilim are monstrous. But I think they might be some of my favorite writing I’ve done. They are Tell All the Truth (But Tell It Slant) and To Fight Aloud, Is Very Brave (Uniforms of Snow), both from the perspective of the leader of the Nephilim, and The Stillness in the Air (Between Heaves of Storm), from the perspective of her hunting partner. I’d put all three on here as a set, because I think they work best that way.
Deorum (Of Gods): a short story I wrote for that writing class I hated. Jack, the main character, lives in a city populated partly by mortals and partly by the gods of the world’s pantheons–Idunn owns a coffee shop, Apollo teaches art at an elementary school, Ninkasi runs a bar, and dark things live in the woods. Jack attracts more gods than he’s strictly comfortable with, and they all seem to know him remarkably well…. I don’t know if it’s my best work in terms of quality, but I definitely think it’s up there as the most fun. This is about forty pages, so I’d have to post it piecemeal.
In response to all those articles about talking to women with headphones…
Someone always says it, whenever it comes up: “I guess I’m just not allowed to talk to anyone any more!”
Well. Yes. It is my duty to inform you that we took a vote all us women and determined that you are not allowed to talk to anyone ever again.
This vote is legally binding.
Yes, of course, all women know each other, the way you always suspected. (Incidentally, so do Canadians. I’m just throwing that out there.) We went into the women’s room at the Applebee’s at the corner of 54 and all the others streamed in through the doors into that endless liminal space, a chain of humans stretching backward heavy skulled Neanderthal women laughing with New York socialites, Lucille Ball hand in hand with the Taung child. We sat around in the couches in the women’s room (I know you’ve always been suspicious of those couches) and chatted with each other in the secret female language that you always knew existed. Somebody set up a Playstation– the Empress Wu is ruthless at Mario Kart and Cleopatra never learned to lose and a woman who ruled an empire that fell when the Sea People came and left no trace can use the blue shell like a surgical instrument.
Eventually we took the vote. You had three defenders: your grandmother and your first-grade teacher and an Albanian nun who believes the best of everybody. Your mom abstained. It was duly recorded in the secret notebooks that have been kept under the couch in the Applebee’s since the beginning of recorded time. And then we went back to playing Mario Kart and Hoelun took off her bra and we didn’t think about you again except that I had to carry this message.
So anyway good luck with that it’s just as you always said it was. Hush now, no talking
All right, so, those of you who’ve been around long enough may or may not recall that my practice when I hit a round number of followers is to post some original writing (see: Methods of Inheritance and Sabbatical). And I’m coming up on 400, so I’ll be doing that again! But! I have…a lot of original fiction. A lot of original fiction. So I’m going to offer a list of options, and you lot can tell me which one you’d like to see! To vote, you can reply to this post or reblog it, or send me a message, although I’d prefer the ask box over a private message just because it’ll be easier to collate the answers that way. For the novels, obviously, you’d be getting an excerpt, probably 2-5 pages. Any short stories, though, you’d get all of.
Polaris:the revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel (as yet incomplete). Like. There’s more detail, obviously. But that’s pretty much what we’re dealing with there. There are a bunch of LGBT characters and a few superpowers and a revolution, thus: revolutionary girlfriends with superpowers novel. Tag is here if you want more detail.
Falls the Shadow: my best beloved novel about the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, led by Sam, the Horseman of Death and Antichrist. This one’s complete, but it is H E F T Y at 250K words. I’m editing it down. Tag is here, but no one asks me about it, so there’s not much there. First of a trilogy.
Battalion: the novel where angels happened and fucked everything up, and humans have been fucking them over in response for about 70 years (incomplete). Yep. That’s here, and there is exactly one post.
Stories From the Second War:a triad of short stories technically set in the FtS universe, about Heaven’s war against the Nephilim. Um…they’re dark. The Nephilim are monstrous. But I think they might be some of my favorite writing I’ve done. They are Tell All the Truth (But Tell It Slant) and To Fight Aloud, Is Very Brave (Uniforms of Snow), both from the perspective of the leader of the Nephilim, and The Stillness in the Air (Between Heaves of Storm), from the perspective of her hunting partner. I’d put all three on here as a set, because I think they work best that way.
Deorum (Of Gods): a short story I wrote for that writing class I hated. Jack, the main character, lives in a city populated partly by mortals and partly by the gods of the world’s pantheons–Idunn owns a coffee shop, Apollo teaches art at an elementary school, Ninkasi runs a bar, and dark things live in the woods. Jack attracts more gods than he’s strictly comfortable with, and they all seem to know him remarkably well…. I don’t know if it’s my best work in terms of quality, but I definitely think it’s up there as the most fun. This is about forty pages, so I’d have to post it piecemeal.
i met someone today and when i asked him if he was a dog person or a cat person he said he was a fish person. a fish person. he’s not even allergic to dogs or cats, he’s had no traumatizing experiences, he just doesn’t like dogs OR cats. he likes fish. what the fuck. what the actual fuck. who is this aquaman wanna-be hating on dogs AND cats what the fuck. who the fuck hates both of them? what, he’s gonna come home and be greeted by the excited gurgling of a fucking goldfish? that fish don’t love you man. that fish doesn’t even recognize you as a person. you’re just a food dispenser. he’s gonna die someday and that fish won’t mourn him. that fish won’t even know he’s gone. hating on dogs and cats. wehat the fuck. i’m never associating with that boy again. fish person. what the fukc.
i realized i posted this to the wrong blog but i’m still too pissed off to care. fucking fish person.
