Thank you so much! I’m kind of relieved it sounds like fun to people, because it has eaten my whole brain and put every WIP fic on hold and demanded not just a language but also a functional harbor code for drums/horn/lanterns, and it has haunted me that I might be wasting my time on something boring.
I love your writing a lot, esp your original writing. Could you tell us about your current novel? The 'earth is where trouble comes from' one? Pretty pretty please?
OH MY GOD ANON YES I WILL.
Okay, so you might know how at the end of every third YA book where there’s a trip to another world and a prophecy and magic and world-saving, the protagonist gets popped back into their life on Earth all “Welp, good to have you here, kid, have fun with your nice Life Lessons and PTSD and what-not, about your business.” Like, Narnia, for example. I had a lot of issues with Narnia and the whole “You’re too old now, you can never come back, leave and go live out your life and forget about magic and wonder and miracles” shtick when I read it as a little kid. Yeah, this novel is the product of maybe twelve years of stewing over that kind of ending.
So, this book, which I’m currently just calling Alleirat, is about the hero of one of those novels and the villain of one of those novels, once they’ve grown up to twenty-somethings.
The general plot of the YA novel (which won’t be written, it’s the backstory) was that a ten-year-old girl and boy both fell through a thin spot between worlds to Alleirat, where magic is the norm and there’s a standing prophecy someone got off a ghost a long time ago about a worldwalker who will save them from a great evil. Since they manage to fall through to a time where sexism is kind of A Thing, they leave the girl, who takes the name Brenneth and has an ability for fire magic, to be raised as a blacksmith, and take the boy, Crispin, with an ability for weather magic, to be trained as a hero–and spend the next ten years telling Crispin that it’s his destiny to save them all. Crispin, unsurprisingly, snaps, when he’s twenty years old. He suffers a nervous breakdown, and the logic he follows is that, in order to save everyone, he needs to be in control, and he consequently sets out to take over the world. Which goes over great–so great, in fact, that he’s given the nickname the White Wolf (their society associates white with death and wolves with evil/hunger/rage). Increasingly desperate to stop him, the Alleirai leaders call on Crispin’s oldest friend Brenneth to fight for them, and she agrees. About four years (and one sword through the chest very narrowly survived Because Magic) later she manages to stop Crispin (and also cuts off his arm, which he understandably takes personally).
And then…they get popped back into their ten-year-old, perfectly intact bodies on Earth. No destiny. No magic. No one who understands why these two kids who were perfectly normal an hour ago suddenly act like soldiers fresh off the battlefield, jumping at every loud noise and picking fights and waking up from screaming nightmares. Except each other.
Fast forward fourteen years (take two, On Earth Version) and we’re at the start of the novel. Brenneth and Crispin have a very strange relationship, the sort of relationship you might expect from two people who have transitioned from friends, to close friends, to mortal enemies, to calling each other just to listen to someone scream at them in Alleirai, to drinking weekly and talking about how much they hate being stuck on Earth. They have Issues, is the point here, and the primary life lesson they took away from their time in Alleirat is “magic is great, and just because you were born on one planet doesn’t make it your home.” So, naturally, they fall through to Alleirat again.
Which is great.
Except for the fact that, in order:
Crispin is probably going to be executed for his crimes, which he understands but Brenneth is Not Okay with (and willing to take a stand against)
It’s been four centuries since they left
Brenneth is highly uneasy with having gone down in history as a hero of legend
It’s been four centuries and everyone they knew is consequently dead
They’ve come back just in time to deal with another worldwalker fucking shit up, this time with death magic (necromancy, woo! *throws flowers*)
It’s been FOUR CENTURIES and they’re officially in history books and constellations
Now, the reason that Earth Is The Problem Planet, is that, basically, there are hundreds or thousands of worlds (the Alleirai know this for sure) and they all intersect at Earth. The problems with this are that, A, Earth is the only world without magic (since all the other worlds basically cancel it out) and therefore a lot of people on Earth have truly massive magical potential built up over the millennia, which turns terrifying once they can actually use it (Crispin figured out how to fly using weather magic, and Brenneth can cast unquenchable dragon fire), and, B, people from Earth keep falling through the cracks. Since they’re distributed across all these worlds, Alleirat can and has gone several centuries without one, but they’re also common enough that Alleirat does have a word specifically for them. And they usually cause trouble, because it’s always the ones with strong magic who fall through.
So yeah, that’s basically the novel.
Some other things I find to be highlights:
Alleirat has actual high fantasy diversity! The mountainous Northern part of the continent has fair-skinned folk, whereas Brenneth (whose family is from southern India) looks more like the people from the fertile Southern plains, closer to the equator of the planet. The Outrigger Islands scattered around the south and east/west tend to have skin tones ranging between maybe Morocco and Nubia, depending on how far from the midline of the planet they are.
Alleirat, having been schooled by Brenneth last time, now has a warrior/civilian divide rather than our masculine/feminine divide (it looks similar, though, because Humans Are Problematic). This manifests itself most intensely in a distinction in dress. Civilians are expected to dress more modestly, whereas any gender of warrior is accepted to be shirtless pretty much whenever. Hair length is also considered to be more of a marker of social rank than skin tone–long hair equates to higher status, shorter hair means you work as a laborer or another low-status job (this has been a thing for a long while, though, since before Crispin and Brenneth).
Alleirat has dragons (crafted and blessed by the god of fire, battle, and lies, of whom Brenneth is a devotee) and griffins (crafted and blessed by the goddess of stars, storms, and fallen things, of whom Crispin is a devotee). Dragons breathe unquenchable magical fire, and griffins can send lightning along their wings. I think they’re pretty cool.
Alleirat has an arrangement called amuniasa, which is an unrequited or courtly love arrangement, as an accepted part of society. The amdri, or the lover, tells the object of their feelings how they feel, and that person can either accept a romantic/sexual relationship or proclaim themselves amiasa, or the beloved, indicating that they don’t return the feelings, but recognize the honor they are being given. It’s very poor form to pressure your amiasa into returning your feelings, and likewise it’s very poor form to lead your amdri on–your window to change your mind is limited. Amuniasa is generally considered to be about as binding as marriage, although plenty of amdri also have a spouse whom they love sincerely–basically, polyamory. Example: Brenneth’s right-hand woman last time around was her amdri, although her feelings were completely committed to Brenneth and she never took a spouse. Also, she has a daughter that joins Crispin and Brenneth this time (their specific race is incredibly long-lived) whose coloring suggests that she specifically took a lover who looked like Brenneth.
Brenneth is pretty much the beauty standard these days (they take their heroes of legend seriously in Alleirat), meaning that they revere women with lush black hair, broad shoulders, and dark skin. I dunno, it felt right at the time that I made that decision.
The primary port city on the East, Dase, has a port that is literally carved straight into a four-hundred-foot cliff face. Like. The city is on top of the harbor. I stole this from the D&D campaign I ran last semester, but I did invent it in the first place for a completely different novel that will never be finished, so. It’s not plagarism because I wrote it, basically.
I am literally creating a language for this bullshit universe that has taken over my life. I am ilala–an idiot.
the worst thing about spending your life on the internet is that when you’re playing a game like cards against humanity at a party you’re the person who has to explain what things like bukkake are
Can we PLEASE remove the stigma for blue collar work in America?
“You don’t wanna be a garbage collector when you grow up, do you?”
$34,000 a year, no college needed?
God forbid you take an honest job $7,000 above Michigan’s average cost of living line.
“You don’t wanna be a ditch digger.”
Bitch, I was making $15 an hour, post tax, doing exactly that, the fuck is wrong with it? (Other than it was physically exhausting.)
We need to help America, as a whole, understand that college is not, and should not be he only option, and that there is NO SHAME in trade school or even getting a career right out of high school.
I, personally, know plumbers making $80,000+ a year. Better than most 4 year degree workers.
We need plumbers, janitors, truck-drivers, garbage collectors, machinists, to keep this nation running smoothly. And they deserve respect for what they do.
Don’t neglect your toys even when you have a partner because one day you might be without a partner and all you will find are corroded batteries inside.
OK listen as someone who collects dolls and blind box figurines and things I was nodding along in appreciation of the cynical message “people are ephemeral, stuff is forever” until I got to the end of this sentence and realized I’d wildly misinterpreted the intent of this post.
So, it’s a brand new time travel show on NBC; still finding it’s feet but I swear every episode has been better than the last and I’m so excited to see where it ends up.
1. The incredibly gifted Malcolm Barrett plays Rufus. Rufus is a flawless human being. He’s sweet and smart and awkward and scared shitless but keeps trying even though he’s in way over his head. He gets at least one positively epic moment per episode.
2. Race is brought up in every single episode, because Rufus has his own perspective on historical events and the show bothers to treat that as relevant. His white teammates, Wyatt and Lucy, are made aware of their white privilege while time traveling (for example, in the Lincoln assassination episode, Lucy is constantly reminded that the racial issues she can see in abstract terms are personal to Rufus).
3. Frequent encounters with historical POC, from Colored Regiments to Black Panthers to Shawnee chieftainess Nonhelema (god, I was so sure that episode was going to disappoint me with Scary Indians TM. Then they were like, “Nope, gonna teach you about this amazing Native woman who you never heard of and also portray her grievances with the white invaders as totally legitimate.”) The show constantly reminds us that POC were also doing things throughout history and those things were important.
4. In modern time, all of the main cast back at base are POC. Two are WOC.
5. POC in the background. When the background is mostly white except for a few Black servants, at some point it will be pointed out that this isn’t because white people are “normal” but because segregation/discrimination was a thing. When the setting was actually diverse, they show that. Like in the Alamo episode; it had many white American and white immigrant defenders, but also some Mexicans and Blacks. Your average portrayal would completely ignore them. On Timeless, they explicitly talk about the free Blacks in Mexico. Even when Crockett or Bowie is talking, the background still has Black and Hispanic actors.
6. I kept worrying that they’d start out well, but eventually sideline Rufus and focus on just Wyatt and Lucy, especially since they initially bond more with each other while he is very protective of them. But recent episodes have also had them fighting to save him, the whole group bonding more and Rufus consistently getting the most interesting characterization and storylines.
In conclusion, in addition to being a fun sci-fi adventure it’s sci-fi that remembers to treat POC like a normal part of history. Please support it so it stays on air
This has been a long, weird year, and if you’re like me, you wrote a whole whack of fic over the course of it. So here’s a bunch of questions to ask about that:
What’s your personal favourite thing you wrote this year?
What’s your least favourite thing you wrote this year?
Which of your fics was most different from what you usually write?
Which of your fics this year was most successful?
Which of your fics do you wish was more successful?
What’s your favourite piece of dialogue you wrote this year?
What’s your favourite piece of description or narration?
Which fic this year was most fun to write?
If you could go back and change something about one of the fics you wrote this year, what would it be?
What, if anything, are you going to try to do differently in your writing in the new year?
Our dog ran away today because my brother and his best friend accidentally let her out and started chasing her and I have spent 8 hours looking for her and now it is dark and I don't know what to do.
Oh, honey, I’m not going to lie, that sounds absolutely awful. I’m so sorry this is happening, and I wish I could tell you that there’s some miracle secret to fixing this. Hell, I wish I could come and fix it myself. As it is, all I can tell you is that this too shall pass, one way or another, and that you’ll survive, and offer a few pieces of advice that you might/might not have tried already.
Contact all your local animal shelters, give them a description of your dog and her name, and then ask them to call you if a dog matching that description comes in. Visit them in person, if you can, and check back frequently. If you don’t have a shelter nearby, try contacting the police department.
Post notices in grocery stores, community centers, etc. I’d focus on areas where pet owners tend to be common, such as pet stores and the vet’s office, because another pet owner is more likely to come through for you.
If you decide to post a reward, be cautious of people who report in just in hopes of getting the reward. I’d suggest leaving out one distinguishing feature about your dog (if possible–my black Lab, for example, is just…black, not a lot of distinguishing features to speak of) and then asking the people who claim they have her to describe her in detail.
And most of all, don’t give up hope, all right, sweetie? Pets have been found after months. I hope this pans out well for you, baby, keep me posted and let me know if there’s anything I can do to make you feel better, okay?
Alright but moana introduces maui to her people and after the inital “wow it’s really him!” He becomes almost like just another villager, minutes the whole being a demigod thing, and has what’s like a big family for the first time and one day moanas dad/mom congratulates him by saying “good job, son” and he has to take a minute because………son???? He’s someone’s son now??? He starts to tear up and moana is like “hey you ok?” And he just nods, replying “I finally have a family”
And he’s so happy that Moana decides that she’s gonna tell her parents to call maui son as much as possible and they’re cool with it so they start calling him son and maui loves it but Moana decides to go above and beyond so she tells all the grownups in the village “hey call him son he’s never been part of a family” and they’re like ok yeah sure we all like the guy so all the grown ups in the tribe start calling him son and the kids catch on and start calling him brother and mauis just so overwhelmed with happiness.
And after Maui is “adopted” by the tribe, he gets a new tattoo that’s directly over his heart of him being part of the tribe as family.
But in this tat he’s not the center of attention like all his other ones. He’s just a little part of the whole village, next to everyone else.
Needless to say, it’s his favorite tattoo he has
BONUS: one day some kids see the tattoo on his back and they’re like u don’t need that cuz ur real family wouldn’t just throw you away like that plus we’re your family now and they use body paint to paint over it.
And since he does have a family now, when the paint dries and washes away the tattoo changes.
Some of it stays the same, his human parents casting him away, but instead of the ocean being down there, it’s the village of motonui with their arms raised to receive him
listen. we all know 2017 is going to be a horrific dystopian shitshow on a global level. but i hope on a PERSONAL level, you’re able to attain the stability, peace & support you need to survive it. happy new year. ✌
Funny how sex is an irresistible human urge when a man rapes a woman but when a woman gets pregnant and wants an abortion she should have been smarter and thought twice before having sex if she didn’t want a child
For @littlestartopaz: What would have happened if Leia was sent to
Tatooine and Luke to Alderaan?
This sounds like an excuse for my very favorite thing:
blatantly strong-in-the-Force Jedi Leia.
I was gonna do headcanons but instead HERE is the first scene of Leia
Skywalker of Tatooine finding some old asshole in a brown robe. *backflips out*
Leia scowled at the old man—Ben Kenobi, her ass—and the droid at her knee warbled happily.
“You lied,” Leia said. The sweet-faced boy draped in white robes on
the recording had asked for an Obi-wan,
but Kenobi’s aren’t exactly a dime a dozen since the old homestead was
annihilated by the Tuskens. She can do
the math.
“From a certain point of view,” Kenobi said
with a shrug, smiling down at the droid.
“The boy on the recording–”
[Prince Luke Organa of Alderaan]
the droid offered.
“—very helpful, thanks, Prince Luke said you
were his only hope,” Leia said, prowling forward. “What exactly qualifies you for that, old man?”
Kenobi looked up at her with a start at that,
blinking pale blue eyes at her, and gave a brittle half-laugh. “You’re very much like your father, when I
knew him,” he said distantly. And then
he launched into an epic tale about Jedi and her father and Leia stood, feeling
shock shiver through her. She had known
that her father was a general, but a Jedi?
Heck, I bet there’s a special, secret lounge accessible only to students who convincingly give the door an answer it hadn’t had in mind.
Do you think Ravenclaws ever argue with the door to their tower? I bet they do. Like, the eagle says their answer to the riddle is wrong, but they argue the point and the eagle eventually comes around to their side and lets them in.
Okay, but I actually think about this all the time. Ravenclaws and their problems with their dormitory door.
Like, imagine Su Li and Lisa Turpin coming back from dinner having some conversation or another about how they have some Herbology essay due tomorrow and neither of them did it because they were too distracted with a tangent they got on while doing their Potions homework. And Lisa’s going, “Alright, Su, Tony’s already got the books, so we just have to buckle down and do this. We got this. It’s fine. We’ll just go in and work our asses off.” They get to the door and knock, still talking, entirely on muscle memory. They’re barely listening when the eagle asks them, “Where do Vanished objects go?” Lisa’s brain is a little too fried with worry to think at the moment, but she’s not too concerned about getting in because Su looks calm and thoughtful about this one. And then Su turns to her and goes, “Where DO Vanished objects go?” Damn it all to hell, Lisa knows that look. “Su. Su, no. It’s a riddle, Su. It’s just a riddle.” “Yeah, I know it’s a riddle, but it’s also a legitimate question. I mean, Vanished objects have to go SOMEWHERE, right? For you to Conjure them again afterwards? Or are you just creating an identical object out of nothing? Or maybe not nothing… what are Conjured objects made of, do you think?” “Su, we really have to write this Herbology essay.” “I know. But it’s an interesting question. I bet somebody’s done a study on this. I heard Padma say that Conjured objects are different to real ones. Do you think that there’d be a way to tell if your Conjured object was the same one you’d Vanished? Like, if you bespelled it with a charm and it came back with the spells?” “Well… I once heard an upper-year say that Vanishing bespelled objects is tricky. They were looking into it for their Curse-Breaking apprenticeship. But it might be possible. I definitely don’t think it’s possible to Conjure bespelled objects from nothing.” “It might be. I read this book where somebody talked about conjuring a Sneak-o-scope and those are definitely enchanted objects.” “Was it a Gilderoy Lockhart book? Because that sounds like bullshit to me.” “No, I can show you. It was in a Auror’s Memoirs. I just returned them to the library this morning, so I bet nobody’s taken them out yet. And-” “That sounds like an unreliable source.” “AND I was reading this Charms book the other day that referenced a book on the specifics of Vanishing objects that had an author who was an expert in their field and a retiree from the Department of Mysteries with the same last name as the book by the Auror.” “I’m not believing this until I see a source.” “Fine, come on!” The eagle knocker has long since settled back into its resting state by then, Su and Lisa immediately run off to the library, arguing the whole way, and the next day, Professor Sprout gives the extremely apologetic students an extension on the essay while sighing, “Ravenclaws.”
Or imagine there’s some Muggleborn student who has an astrophysicist for one parent and a biologist for the other, and they think magic is amazing, but they’re also really into Muggle science as well. “Which came first,” the eagle knocker asks them at one point, “the phoenix or the fire?” And they’re immediately like, “the fire.” While their friend is like, “Benny, no, that’s not how this works. My brother told me about things like this, it’s one of those paradox questions.” “What? No way. Fire came first.” “Benny…” “Fire is a chemical reaction and, as far as I can tell, phoenixes are a fiery bird that probably evolved just like everything else did on this planet. We’re a really small speck on the cosmic calendar, Raleigh, and I’m saying that unless phoenixes are actually aliens - which would be AWESOME, you-” “Benny…” “-have to admit - fire came first. There are trillions of stars that haved burned and died billions of years before our sun was even born. This is just like that chicken and the egg question, in that it sounds like a paradox but it’s actually not, because the egg existed long before the bird we know as the chicken ever evolved-” “Benny!” “What?” “You… the door opened.” “What? Oh cool. Finally, someone who recognizes science in this nutty place.” About a week later, Benny completely disrupts and derails their Astronomy class by arguing with Professor Sinestra about the school curriculum (that hasn’t been updated in more than fifty years or more) being “WAY TOO OUT OF DATE, PROFESSOR! THIS TEXTBOOK WAS WRITTEN IN 1910! THESE TELESCOPES ARE RIDICULOUS! WHEN’S THE LAST TIME A WIZARD WENT TO AN ACTUAL PLANETARIUM?! OH MY GOD, DO WIZARDS EVEN KNOW THAT THE AMERICANS HAVE GONE TO THE MOON?” And the wizardborn kids are like, “The Americans have WHAT?” While poor Raleigh has his face in his hands and isn’t even surprised.
Or imagine other things. Like that time the first years has to stand around for two hours after the Welcoming Feast because their Prefects gave them a short speech, a small tour, and then got into an “academic disagreement” (as the house of Ravenclaw has come to call them) over the riddle. So there’s this group of eleven-year-olds playing party games in the hall while their fifteen-year-old “mentors” yell at each other over the riddle. And they only got inside in the end because someone actually managed to notice that the first years never came in and “Hey, that’s sort of weird”, and sent some second year to go look for them.
Or when NEWTs season came around, and there was a seventh year SO STRESSED that they came back from the library at three in the morning and when the eagle knocker asked them a riddle, they just burst into tears and sobbed against the door for ten minutes before the eagle awkwardly declared, “Nicely answered!” and let them in anyway.
Rowena prepared the knocker for many things; well argued multiple answers, being left behind as the riddle provokes curiosity, and much more, but sobbing? Much like it’s creator, it wasn’t quite sure what to do with sobbing humans.
ok but about the vanishing/conjuring thing…couldn’t you just draw on the object with a sharpie then vanish it and conjur it back to see if it still has the sharpie marks? i mean why over complicate things
@sexuallyfrustratedavocado Yeah but would you be conjuring a duplicate of the object + sharpie or would it be the actual object. Without a way to tell if a conjured object was originally a physical object or if it was created out of nothing, you’re stuck, right?
…scented markers? see if it comes back with the same scent, its about the same as charming it and seeing if it comes back with the charm
WAIT NO FUCK vanish a camera set with a timer and you’ll answer both questions bc 1) if its just a duplicate it will come back without a new picture bc the timer on the duplicate wont have gone off and 2) if its the original than youll have a picture of where ever it went to
I feel like I should have expected this post to go off on a tangent like this.
okay, this article is really good and I am all about the analysis of the way nk jemisin uses apocalypse in the fifth season but
Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings and C.S. Lewis’s Narnia provide the blueprint; a just, magical realm is threatened with destruction by dark, corrupting forces, which must be beaten back by chosen hereditary rulers.
no, no, you’re wrong, because a) the force that defeats sauron is not a chosen hereditary ruler, and b) the really cool thing about tolkien’s cosmology is actually that he does this same thing where he uses apocalypse as both a destructive and creative force, the world has to be broken to be created, arda is created flawed and the promise of arda unmarred is a promise eternally deferred, peace in tolkien is fleeting and tends toward decay, I wrote an entire fucking thesis about this
when did I turn into a person who goes “tolkien’s universe is more morally complex than just ‘good vs. evil, chosen one defeats evil, the end’, fight me” because I’m not sure this is the person I want to be
The funniest part of that quote is that the main purpose and usefulness of lotr’s “chosen hereditary ruler” character is that…well, okay, this is a bit of a dubious rabbit hole, but even though Aragorn is not really a subversion of the destiny-driven heir-in-exile heroic trope, his big difference from other straight-played examples of it is that he knows that he’s really, really, not the protagonist of this particular story (not literally, but, like, functionally? When blocking out the in-universe factors that equate to narrative ones, which are abnormally self-aware here due to how meta LOTR is.) And further, he’s genre-savvy enough to realize that Sauron swears by the inevitability of predictable tropes in other people (because this has actually always worked for him - see: the Rings of Power, 2nd Age; Finrod Felagund, 1st Age) and therefore thinks Aragorn is the protagonist of this particular story.
And so, Aragorn’s main function is to take advantage of this misunderstanding by gathering up all the advantages of his chosen-one-hereditary-ruler-destined-hero-prophecy-fulfiller-ness – both personal (all his know-how and bamf-ery and connections acquired through the improbably cool past granted to him due to his membership in this archetype) and narrative (all the military resources and personal authority that are currently at his disposal due to plot events he was allowed to handle due to his membership in this archetype) – bundling it into a giant ball, and fastballing it at Sauron in the style of some kind of “Dark Lord vs Chosen One: which one can overwhelm the other one through superior might?” climactic battle as convincingly and distractingly as he can (not really expecting, but hoping, they will be of some help to Frodo and that Frodo will somehow save everyone). Which eggs on Sauron’s mistaken belief that he’s in a completely different story from the one LOTR actually is, thereby emptying Mordor of soldiers, focusing all the attention on the army outside the gate, and giving Frodo and Sam a clear path to Mount Doom. Weaponized protagonist-vibes used in the role of a supporting character, in order to serve the actual protagonist.
(yeah, ofc, big oversimplification of that B-plot’s many, many secondary meanings for the bigger scheme of things, but I mean, this is its primary meaning for the A-plot that everything else hangs on bc everything else is a lost cause otherwise.)
By “funniest” I mean…funny how so much lotr-inspired sci fi and fantasy tends to ape at face value the bullshit explanation of the plot that Aragorn fed Sauron/allowed Sauron to believe: “Yeah man, I’m totally the protagonist!! I mean, I’m the chosen one, and the heir of the guy who defeated you the first time, and everything, how could I not be the protagonist, and this attack is totally that big damn good vs evil battle that happens at the end of all the stories that’s against-all-odds for the dramatic tension, but which I expect to magically win due to being a protagonist, pay no attention to the hobbit behind the curtain, hahahahaha, hey, over here, keep your eyes on me, uh, remember this sword? Elendil!! Elendil!!”
Every writer on Tumblr: “I would combust out of love if someone ever drew fanart of my fic!!”
Me: “oh man I wanna draw this scene BUT THEY WOULD PROBABLY HATE IT AND HATE ME FOR THE NERVE”
Dear artists.
We, the writers, will accept any of your fan arts.
We don’t care if it looks like shit to you, or you think your art skills are not good enough.
We will love any fan art, because it’s the most beautiful way to say “I love what you write”.
Okay get this : Poe Dameron does Drunk History (of the Rebellion)
Realistically this is Poe weeping and saying “he was the *pilot* do you get it??? He was the pilot!!!”
Yeah everybody’s assuming Poe would have Cassian as his idol but here’s the thing, and I’m just going to lay this out here for you: Bodhi Rook would be someone Poe admired very, very much. And i know, Finn would be moved by his story, but Poe would have known his story all along and had it in his heart. And maybe that’s why the instant a Stormtrooper pulled his helmet off and said, “This is a rescue,” Poe was like !!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 !!!! because there, in his heart, was Bodhi Rook, who did the right thing even though he was afraid, who did the right thing even though he wasn’t treated well, who did the right thing because it was the right thing and he had to.
theory: poe dameron is absolutely jacked and none of the other pilots can work out why because he is never in the gym and all he does is lounge around and fly and eat stupendous quantities of food, but then finn catches him lifting bb-8 up for a cuddle and works it out, because bb-8 isn’t light.
tl;dr: poe dameron’s work out consists solely of snuggling his droid
There’s nothing chasing you. There won’t be a face in the window. Nothing is following you up the stairs. Nothing is under your bed. You can throw your legs over your bed, you can have your arm over the side of the bed, because nothing is out to get you. I promise. I’m here to protect you. I’ll kick its ass.
OKAY GUYS LISTEN UP
so there’s this website called slader.com and it has EVERY FUCKING ANSWER TO EVERY TEXTBOOK EVER. It has answers AND shows you ALL the work so you can understand it (or be a slacker). This website has literately saved my calculus grade. It even has free tutors if you need the extra help.
Guys, it’s free to register and it will save your life
“For all K-2’s social dysfunction (or perhaps his disinterest in organic socialization-who could fathom the mind of a droid?), he knew Cassian better than anyone. He’d seen Cassian commit acts even Draven wasn’t aware of.
On Jenoport, he’d found Cassian staring at his blaster with tears on his face. K-2 had volunteered for a memory wipe in case Cassian’s “continued dignity and service demanded it.””—Rogue One novelization DONT CRY ABOUT CASSIAN AND K-2′s FRIENDSHIP. DONT DO IT. (via motleystitches)
Hey so I was wondering what your feelings about podfic are? Because I would love to make one of that K2-SO ficlet you wrote . He's my favorite and you've really got him down. *grins *
*chokes on air*
Oh my God? Um, yes? Go to town, please, absolutely, make whatever podfics you want and tag me so that I can flail over them.
(I can’t believe that fic went well, I like wrote it by accident in thirty minutes when I was intending to just do a couple headcanons.)
human: you see i want the particles in my food to vibrate at just the right frequency
Human: *is eating ice cream*
alien: wait you forgot to make that one vibrate!
human: well, you see, not with this food
This one is already vibrating at he desired frequency, but if it starts to vibrate at a higher frequency I lock it back in the cold box.
Human: *just reheated pizza in the oven*
Other human: *is eating a slice of the same pizza, but cold*
Alien: *exasperated sputtering*
Human: shots! shots! shots!
Alien: this liquid has negligible nutritional value and, furthermore, contains some molecules that I believe are poisonous to your species.
Human: …look, sometimes we just like to gather in social groups and disorient ourselves
Human: *grabs a packet of ramen*
Alien: Based on my research of your species, you shouldn’t be able to consume that without suffering heavy detriment to your human body.
Human: …look man, I’m in college. I can barely afford this house with roommates. Let me appreciate this 50 cent block of sodium ridden noodles.
Alien 1: The human consumed this harmful “ramen” because it is affordable. I saw many others consuming unhealthy but affordable foodstuffs from a place called McDonalds. Based on this, I think we can reasonably assume that all foodstuffs that are unhealthy are also affordable, and that humans will slowly die off because of their economic system.
Alien 2: I visited a different land mass. There were several humans called “sushi chefs” preparing raw fish foodstuffs. The most expensive was made from the carcass of a poisonous blowfish. It was very popular among the wealthy humans.
Alien 3: The land I visited had no nearby places to engage in commerce to trade precooked food. I interviewed a family that trapped and killed animals for dinner. They ate venomous rattlesnakes.
Alien 1: *throws clipboard in the air and storms off*
[Human casually munches peppers]
Alien: According to my scans, that organic matter contains highly corrosive chemicals. Are you sure you should be consuming it?
[Human chokes]
Alien: Human! Are you injured? Do you require assistance??
Human: Ahahaha no no I’m fine, it’s just *snicker* these are just jalapenos!
Alien: ……….request clarification?
Human: I usually go for habaneros, man. Hell, I have a buddy who took two bites of a ghost pepper on a dare.
[Alien consults space Google]
Human: ………Hey man, you okay?
I’m dying the alcohol one happened in Star Trek the original series
When I was in school, one of my art teachers used to say “this world needs more creators. There’s more than enough destroyers in the world today.”
Just a reminder, if you create anything–art, writing, food, machines, ideas, equations, knits, tools, gardens–the world needs you.
This makes me happy.
Happy creating, everyone
Honestly this is such a beautiful thing to hear. I am so used to “That’s not real work”, “That’s not a useful skill”, “What a waste of time”, “Don’t you have any hobbies or talents that are actually valuable?” and I’m sick of it. I can make people happy. I can make something where there hasn’t been anything before. I can create. If I put a smile on only one persons face the things I do have meaning.
