Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

Dec 06

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via clockwork-mockingbird)

[video]

batnoodles:

jackbarakatsbuttblog:
how-bad-do-u-want-it:
afroarabia:
“boys dont like it when-"
"girls don’t like it when-”
“people would probably like you better if-”
FAVOURITE POST

(Source: niqabisinparis, via clockwork-mockingbird)

[video]

fuckyeahdarcylewis.tumblr.com -

oft-goes-awry:

I’m watching Thor on TV (again), and I will never stop giggling over the scene where Jane, Darcy and Erik are checking Thor into the hospital.
Because Jane gets all defensive and flustered when Darcy announces that she hit Thor with the van, before trying to deflect onto…

[video]

greenekangaroo:

thebritishteapot:
(x)
There will come a time when this gifset, and everything it is attached to, is something I no longer find hilarious.
Today is not that day.
And according to the stars, tomorrow ain’t lookin’ so good, either.

(Source: witchoria, via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

12-year-old girl: I don't want kids when I grow up.
Society: You'll change your mind when you get older. You're only 12. You're too young to know what you want.
16-year-old girl: I'm pregnant.
Society: How could you be so stupid? Do you know anything about safe sex? You should be ashamed.
20-year-old woman: I'm a single mother with an infant son.
Society: You should've gone to college first. You need a stable career before you can support a child.
33-year-old woman: I'm married and my spouse and I both have stable careers. I have two young daughters now.
Society: You're not staying home? Who's going to take care of them? You're just going to put them in day care while you work? That's selfish of you. You can't expect to raise decent kids with a full-time job.
45-year-old woman: I just had my first child.
Society: Why would you have a child when you're that old? Do you realize the health risks of being pregnant at your age? When your kid is a teenager you'll be a senior citizen. That's inconsiderate of you.
60-year-old woman: I haven't had any children.
Society: Your life must be so unfulfilling. Is there something wrong with you? Why didn't you want kids? How strange.

drythroats:

blindthoughts:
How relationships work:
I like your butt.

However, I can notice other butts. They can be nice too.
But your butt is my favourite butt. It’s the nicest butt. Because it’s mine. And I can touch it.
This.

(Source: moondustandpaperclips, via cthulhu-with-a-fez)