One time I used my retail voice on a coworker and she was like, “Don’t use your customer voice on me, I know you’re dead inside like the rest of us, it’s just frightening and weird”
The other day I asked for a table for two in my customer voice and the waitress squinted at me and I cleared my throat and said “Sorry, still in service mode” and she dropped hers and we swapped stories about our day and my boyfriend was like “You two just became two entirely different people in like .5 seconds…”
I can be bitching up a blue streak about a customer-from-hell while the store is empty, and when the phone rings swap over to my retail voice practically in mid-sentence. I even have managers and salespeople from other stores in the chain fooled into thinking I’m infinitely friendly and helpful, and my manager’s husband thinks I’m one of the most professional people in the store. One assistant manager’s daughter dubbed me Perky-Pants because she mostly dealt with me over the phone, and was shocked to the core when I dropped an F-bomb at her graduation picnic.
The acting required in the service industry is beyond the pale. My cousin freaked out when she came to see me at work because I was all smiling and nice while helping someone who was asking inane questions and who basically forced me to walk them to the product and put it in their fucking hand but I was nice as pie until I turned around to walk away and my demeanor changed back to normal and I muttered “what a fucking moron” under my breath as I got back to my cousin. She just looked at me shocked and said “no wonder you’re so exhausted when you get home.”
this is actually referred to as emotional labor in criminology, and is considered one of the hardest forms of labor
The art of bullshit is strong in the service industry
(via lupinatic)
kayla-bird asked: hey, i'm thinking of watching leverage- can you, like, explain it to me
Imagine if Robin Hood was in the 21st century except instead of King John it’s major corporations and instead of Robin Hood it’s an alcoholic ex-insurance cop lying to himself about being a good man and so hardbitten noir you practically choke on the cigarette smoke
oh and instead of the Merry Men you’ve got a hacker with a heart of gold who once drained the Icelandic bank for his grandmother’s medical bills, a self-loathing hitter who likes to pretend he’s an island when in actuality all he wants is someone to ask him to stay, and a thief who doesn’t melt or soften so much as find her footing, her home, and people who love her.
(also, spoilers, they are all married)
………..and Maid Marian is actually a grifter par excellence, femme fatale in the grand noir tradition, who is selfish and kind and the closest thing to a functional adult in the group, which is sort of terrifying, except for all the parts where it is amazing
It’s coming out in the news today that a teacher raped their 13-year old student. That’s the truth of it.
But since the teacher is a woman, the media’s reporting it as “Engaged in a sexual relationship” and dudes all over the internet are congratulating the kid on getting laid. Some even express jealousy.
To reiterate: He is 13. He is under the age of consent. By textbook definition, this is sexual assault, because he legally cannot consent. It bears repeating.
You may have heard the term “Rape Culture”. It refers to a society that implicitly and indirectly cultivates the mentalities that result both in sexual assault happening and its not being punished properly when it happens.
In other words: This.
This is Rape Culture.
It’s the idea that men and boys cannot be victims. It is the idea that there are circumstances when minors can consent to adults regarding sex. It is romanticizing something that is irrefutably assault.
It is disgusting. It is wrong. And it is shameful.
Absolutely everyone that thinks this is a laughing matter is an embarrassment.
I’ve already seen posts on facebook about how people are impressed that he can “get laid with that haircut” He didn’t “get laid” he was targeted and assaulted by a pedophile.
Women talk about rape and men shoot them down with “WHAT ABOUT MALE VICTIMS”, yet when there is an actual male victim? They’re CONGRATULATING him while it’s women stepping forward to say that this poor boy was absolutely 100% raped. So what is it, MRA types? What about the male victims?
(via academicfeminist)
You get a membership to a tiny rundown gym as a present from your eccentric uncle. It takes some time, but you begin to grow suspicious: Is every member here a…super hero?
Okay but if I was writing this I would drag out this person’s investigation to the last possible minute and be like NOPE, SUPERVILLAINS.
(via itsybittle)
“My eldest daughter, Suldana, is in love with another woman. She is eighteen and she spends her days working at our kiosk selling milk and eggs, and at night she sneaks out and goes down to the beach to see her lover. She crawls back into bed at dawn, smelling of sea and salt and perfume. Suldana is beautiful and she wraps this beauty around herself like a shawl of stars. When she smiles her dimples deepen and you can’t help but be charmed. When she walks down the street men stare and whistle and ache. But they cannot have her. Every day marriage proposals arrive with offers of high dowries but I wave them away. We never talk about these things like mothers and daughters should; but I respect her privacy and I allow her to live.” — Diriye Osman, “Fairytales For Lost Children.” (via mamma-wolf)
(Source: water-veiled, via ailleee)
do you ever look at Successful™ people your age and feel like you’re just floating your way thru life like a very bewildered and directionless bumblebee
(via windbladess)
Hold up - you mean there are people who watch Fight Club and don’t realise that Tyler Durden is meant to be full of shit?
I mean, his doctrine of radical individualism is a sham that ultimately reduces his followers to faceless conformity. This isn’t deep metatextual wankery - it’s the literal text of the film.
How do you see the film and not get that?
My ex didn’t get this. He loves Tyler durden. I’ve never seen fight club so I DIDN’T KNOW.
Yeah, in the film he’s a total con-man. His grand speeches sound good if you don’t think about them too deeply, but they’re not meant to be insightful - they’re meant to be a snake-oil salesman’s patter, calculated to bamboozle dumb, angry young men into doing his bidding.
Trouble is, they’re sufficiently well-written that apparently they work on the dumb, angry young men in the audience, too.
I’ve actually written about this academically! There’s a really specific genre I call bro cinema that includes fight club, all of kubricks work, some Scorsese, and Tarantino (all of which I love TBH.) These directors don’t explicitly condemn toxic masculinity and instead trust the audience to have COMMON SENSE and realize that Alex from A Clockwork Orange or Tyler Durden or Travis Bickle are horrific misogynists. But without the film telling the audience how to feel about these characters, men misinterpret the objectivity as glorification. Fight Club is about how shitty masculinity is, but it’s been warped by men grasping for justification for their misogyny
I JUST REALIZED that this is why I love Fight Club but I hate that my dad loves Fight Club
(via littlestartopaz)
me: [remembers some Really Cool People follow me] shit.. i’m acting like a Fool… [continues to act like a fool.]
(via littlestartopaz)
[Caption: a tweet by actress Mara Wilson:
WRONG: “You’re short”
RIGHT: “It’s impressive that such strength and ferocity can be contained in such a small vessel”]
(Source: mysharona1987, via patroclvss)