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I want to write an alternative version of Romeo and Juliet where instead of being a little ponce and trying to work things out for himself, Romeo asks his smarter friends what to do about the whole thing and Benvolio and Mercutio come up with the world’s greatest plan:
Marriage of convenience between Juliet and Mercutio.
Think about it.
Juliet’s parents want her to marry into the Prince’s family. Mercutio is a good compromise between no marriage and Paris.
Mercutio probably won’t get his inheritance if he keeps being HELLA FUCKING GAY ALL OVER THE PLACE so a beard is only a benefit to him.
They would probably get along great rolling their eyes at how adorably stupid Romeo is.
Romeo and Benvolio could get a “bachelor pad” right next to Juliet and Mercutio’s house. Every night, Romeo and Mercutio high five as they hop the fence to go bang their one true love.
The second half of the play is just all of them trying to keep up the charade and being “THIS CLOSE” to getting caught all the time. But everything ends nicely because true love conquers all.
Everybody wins. Nobody dies.
THE SHAKESPERE AU I NEVER KNEW I NEEDED
DUDE DID YOU JUST FIX ONE OF THE MOST ICONIC PLAYS EVER CREATED?!
ONCE AGAIN EVERYTHING IS SOLVED BY THE QUEER LENS.
I tried to argue that Ophelia resonated because Shakespeare had made an extraordinary discovery in writing her, though I had trouble articulating the nature of that discovery. I didn’t want to admit that it could be something as simple as recognizing that emotionally unstable teenage girls are human beings. …
When Ophelia appears onstage in Act IV, scene V, singing little songs and handing out imaginary flowers, she temporarily upsets the entire power dynamic of the Elsinore court. When I picture that scene, I always imagine Gertrude, Claudius, Laertes, and Horatio sharing a stunned look, all of them thinking the same thing: “We fucked up. We fucked up bad.” It might be the only moment of group self-awareness in the whole play. Not even the grossest old Victorian dinosaur of a critic tries to pretend that Ophelia is making a big deal out of nothing. Her madness and death is plainly the direct result of the alternating tyranny and neglect of the men in her life. She’s proof that adolescent girls don’t just go out of their minds for the fun of it. They’re driven there by people in their lives who should have known better.
Tumblr’s Staff has posted about a third party obtaining access to select tumblr accounts. While they say there has been no evidence to prove this third party is trying to access these accounts, there have been multiple people who have been affected and hacked. Mitzu ( @mitzusins) was one of those hacked. Oolay ( @oolay-tiger) has also been affected, but not hacked.
Please listen to me folks. If you have been signed out of your account without your own doing so, D O N O T click any links to reset a paaword on an email. You can do this on your own Tumblr, and clicking on any links can make your personal information available to this hacker.
If you have clicked on a link and reset your password, I’m telling you right now: CHANGE YOUR TUMBLR AND EMAIL PASSWORD IMMEDIATELY UPON READING THIS. You can possibly save yourself from being hacked and blocked from your email account by doing this.
Please reblog and spread this as fast as you can. Many peoples’ accounts and personal information are at stake and this is a horrific event that is happening. If you know anyone who is being affected ESPECIALLY forward them this post. Thank you all for sharing, and please be safe.
This is 100% true. I got logged out today, something that has never happened to me before. And I got sent a password changing link from ‘Gmail’…even though I wanted to change my TUMBLR password and my email is MSN. DO NOT CHANGE YOUR PASSWORD THROUGH A EMAIL LINK. YOU CAN CHANGE IT ON TUMBLR YOURSELF.
Please spread this around, because not only is it endangering you if you clicked the link but the minors who could of clicked it to. And giving out a minor’s information could attract predators to them and that’s really fucked up so please I beg you spread this. I don’t care what kind of blog you are just please get this word around.
me, the curtain lifting, the fog clearing, comprehension dawning, the realization hitting me directly in the face as a montage of the past few days goes through my head:
Ah
Im going through the reigns of Roman Emperors and jfc it’s either “rule: ~20 years in relative peace” or “rule: 3 months and 2 days. Stabbed to death by praetorian guard”, there’s practically no middle ground.
