spin the bottle except instead of kissing each other you fight
For anyone interested, consider the game Slap or Kiss. We played this game so many times senior year of college, I don’t know why our drunk selves were so obsessed with slapping and kissing each other. It’s exactly what it sounds like:
1. You spin the bottle. Whoever it lands on will either have to slap or kiss you.
2. You, the spinner, leave the room. Everyone else gets to vote on whether you will get slapped or kiss. Majority wins, the person who the bottle landed on doesn’t get a vote.
3. When it’s decided, you’re called back in for the surprise Slap or Kiss, and everyone watches with anticipation because they all know and you have no idea and i love it
Bonus: Combine it with Truth or Dare. If you don’t like the Truth or Dare you got, you can choose to do Slap or Kiss instead.
(via yea-lets-do-this-shit)
Pet your turtles, they enjoy snugglies more than pain
I feel like this is especially appropriate for cars and turtles in the road.And don’t drill holes in them or paint em. Its painful and toxic and you’ll make the poor things cry!
Our turtles love having their heads and chins scratched. And a light pat on their shells. No hits, or thumps. They love good pets, please pet them with love.
Shells are LITERALLY their backbone, imagine if someone thumped you hard on the spine. It would suck right? Don’t do it.
Also their shells are covered in a VERY thin layer of fingernail-like material called scutes. When you paint it, a) it’s very easy for the toxins in the paint to absorb into the turtle’s system and poison them, b) it cuts off circulation to the thin layer of living skin below the scutes, c) it deforms the shell because turtles, especially young turtles, grow rapidly and the paint will inhibit proper shell growth and d) prevents the turtle from absorbing necessary vitamin D from UV rays (you know, that stuff they need to live). NEVER EVER PAINT A TURTLE EVER.
Next time you want to knock on a turtle/tortoise shell, go ask your neighbor to punch you in the ribs, and see how that feels. Not only is it the spine, but their lungs sit near the top of the curve as well—THIS IS WHY TURTLES/TORTOISES CAN DIE IF LEFT FLIPPED OVER TOO LONG, IT IS VERY DISTRESSING FOR THEIR BODIES.
be gentle with living beings you are responsible for.
(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
the military begins recruiting ‘soldiers’ before they grow out of their booster seat
four year olds have toy guns and green army men
by grade school you’ve memorized the star spangled banner and the pledge of allegiance
in middle school you’re old enough to play first person shooters set in war times. you and your friends brag about how many kills you have, what guns are your favorite
in high school, rotc comes to visit. you get letters in the mail detailing scholarship and housing opportunities you could have
and if you’re poor or unsure of your future or in love with the idea of ‘protecting your country’ like the men in call of duty
every branch of the military has a sponsored blog on here because they want everyone 13 and up to know that soldiers are heroes and they should join them
To those of you who were wondering, this is a very US-specific post. What gets done to you guys is terrifying, and it’s really unfair.
Ah yes I remember how the different military branches visited my high school at multiple times throughout the year and set up their little pull up bars and had little competitions and the strong little ones got lanyards so the recruiters could pick them out
I dont even know if you’re joking or not
We’re not
We’re really not. What’s super terrifying, that I learned in my kinetic imaging major, is that our military actually hires game designers to design video games promoting our military, and markets them to kids as young as ten or twelve. Our government made friggin reality TV shows out of taking high schoolers and teaching them about the “awesome shit” that they could do for the military.
We watched one of the episodes in my Critical Media class, and it made me so physically ill that I actually had to leave the classroom and heave over the toilet while sobbing my eyes out.This level of propaganda can and does lead to violence even amongst said children. Ask any Puerto Rican child that’s ever refused to say the “pledge of allegiance” (that’s the real name for what most kids are asked to recite every day before school starts) what happens to them exclusively via the other children who consider this blasphemy.
I took the ASVAB (an intelligence test that the military uses to see which branch you would do best in) as a joke in 10th grade to see who would score higher, myself or my boyfriend. He scored a 91, I scored a 93. The next thing I knew, I had recruiters calling my house and visiting my school. I was pulled out of class to talk to recruiters who came to my school specifically to see me. One recruiter from the Marines showed up at my house after school. When I told him that my mother wasn’t home and I wouldn’t allow him inside he tried to push open the door and said “That’s okay, she doesn’t have to be here for us to talk.” I had to tell him numerous times that I would not talk to anyone without my mother present. Then he sat in his car and waited for her to come home. Keep in mind that I am an overweight female and these recruiters were still trying to get me to sign. They were talking about special diets and training programs that would get me in shape in time for my 18th birthday so I could join. It was ridiculous. My mom said that she had never seen anything like it, and she had scored a 92 during college when she had taken it. (Then again, she had joined the Air Force almost immediately after taking the test, because that was her dream.) Shit is scary.
Oh god yes this brings back memories. I took the ASVAB on a lark to skip classes. I scored a 92 and my GOD the effort they put in to try and recruit me… This was pre 9/11 when I did it, but afterwards (post 9/11) they got WORSE. They told me whatever I wanted to do for a career they could help me but they were so PUSHY they freaked me out. I hid whenever I saw the recruiting staff on campus
I started getting a recruiter contacting me when I was 26 goddamn years old, while married to a PTSD’d out twice deployed vet.
Eventually I responded to an email with “I’m fat, asthmatic and married to a human y’all ruined so leave me the fuck alone” and he did.
At the same time he started sending my then husband letters about how they were going to call him back to service if he didn’t re-up in the National Guard (who also get deployed to the Middle East), which is actually a lie. nevertheless, my ex was terrified he’d get brought back in and burned all the letters so there’d be no record of him receiving them.Turns out that recruiter won a bunch of awards in the state for his recruitment statistics. Interesting ways he went about it, huh?
the marines kept calling my house and mailing things to me and my little sister (who is 12) trying to get us to sign up and my mom finally had to talk on the phone to the dude and tell him that i was a chronically ill trans kid and i would not nor would i ever be joining the us military and they finally quit calling
ive also been singled out and yelled at by multiple teachers in school for refusing to stand and say the pledge of allegiance over the years, told things like i was disrespectful and was a traitor to my country and whatnot. its especially bad and military-centric in the south (i currently live in NC). If you dont live in the us, look up the words to the pledge of allegiance. its vaguely reminiscent of Nazi propaganda, and they start children saying it every day from age 5. how many 5 year olds know what they are saying and agreeing to? none of them, thats how many.
My high school required us to take the asvab. For two years afterwards I received near daily calls from the air force.
jeez. i went to school in ny and had a really liberal teacher in 5th grade who would drop little comments about discrimination against illegal immigrants, maybe we shouldn’t say “God” in the pledge, etc. and if he hadn’t made those comments i wouldn’t have thought twice about these things even though i wasn’t religious and was reciting a pledge involving “God” every day. by hs, everyone just stood and listened to the pledge without reciting it, and we never had crazy military recruitment. did get the west point letters in the mail though
I went to school in NY too and that’s where I took the ASVAB my senior year of high school and got letters from all the branches because I did so well. Specifically, the Air Force Academy wanted me real bad lol. You get the stuff about the military all the time in school. But I was an Army brat so I got it double you know?
At both New York Comic Cons I’ve been to, the Armed Forces have a big booth set up with a bunch of video games that Con-goers can try out - and a recruiter conveniently sitting right there in case anyone wants to sign up.
In my after-school class, one of my students is now an official recruit and has already missed class twice to attend his army events.
I got several calls from the Marines when I was in High School. It was like they were boys trying to ask me put on a date, just chatting with me about myself and what I was interested in. Thankfully I still had my deathly fear of intimacy with men so I eventually emphasized my asthma to get them to leave me alone.
But now in the cold light of 10 years later, that was some grooming shit. Making me feel like a special kid. Preying on a 16 year old girl. Fuck that.This is fucking terrifying. No wonder conservative American governments are so furiously opposed to free/affordable college, housing and healthcare - if poor kids had access to all that stuff as a matter of routine, then what the fuck would the army have left to bribe them with?
Yeah, actually, I remember an Army recruiter at my high school saw me get into an argument protecting someone, and since he’d seen my grades/PSAT scores he was kind of all over trying to pitch the military to me. It was pretty alarming, and that’s coming from someone who’s been aggressively wooed by colleges. I’m pretty sure the only way I really got out of being actively hassled was because I left high school early, before I could take any of the other exams they look at.
(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
Ted Cruz suspended his campaign.
Oh my god. Donald fucking Trump is gonna be the Republican presidential nominee.
I have to go back in time and warn August 2015 me to not laugh at the idea because apparently IT IS NOT SO LAUGHABLE AFTER ALL.
Save me from this country pls.
i never thought i’d say this but i overestimated america
(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
I saw a guy with a “Smart Phones Make Dumb People” bumper sticker talking on a Samsung Galaxy as he drove down the highway, and honestly I haven’t seen modern art in motion like that in my entire millennial life
(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
I am sick and I have completely lost my voice. Awesome. I so very much don’t have time for this.
congratulations on the record-breaking 16 Hamilton nominations:
Hamilton for Best New Musical
Hamilton (Lin-Manuel Miranda) for Best Book of a Musical
Hamilton (Lin-Manuel Miranda) for Best ScoreLin-Manuel Miranda for Best Actor in a Leading Role in a Musical
Leslie Odom, Jr. for Best Actor in a Leading Role in a Musical
Phillipa Soo for Best Actor in a Leading Role in a Musical
Daveed Diggs for Best Actor in a Featured Role in a Musical
Jonathan Groff for Best Actor in a Featured Role in a Musical
Christopher Jackson for Best Actor in a Featured Role in a Musical
Renée Elise Goldsberry for Best Actress in a Featured Role in a MusicalThomas Kail for Best Direction of a Musical
Andy Blankenbuehler for Best Choreography
Alex Lacamoire for Best Orchestrations
David Korins for Best Scenic Design of a Musical
Paul Tazewell for Best Costume Design of a Musical
Howell Binkley for Best Lighting Design of a Musical
(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
[video]
with the weather getting warmer I wanted to address something that a lot of people don’t know. if you have a german shepherd, husky, pomeranian, corgi, collie or any breed with a double coat, DO NOT SHAVE THEM DOWN
so many people shave their double coated dogs thinking it will keep them cool in the summer but this couldn’t be more wrong!!! the undercoat actually helps keep them cool!!! by shaving them down you are actually doing more harm than good. without the protection of the undercut, your dog can easily become sunburned and will feel the heat much more than they would with the undercoat. shaving them removes their ability to cool themselves down
so in conclusion, PLEASE DONT SHAVE YOUR DOUBLE COATED DOGS
I saw a couple posts about this but this is the only one to explain it, so here you go! Important doggy owner info!
(Source: twentyonegvrls, via lupinatic)
Posted on CBC. Had to share. This was the commentary on the page:
“Congratulations! You have encountered a grown woman in her 30s. Look at her, talking excitedly about something that’s important to her, like the novel she’s writing, or her PhD, or ravioli. Why not ruin her day and school her on the crushing reality of human biology? Here’s a handy flowchart to help you decide if you should.”
(via primarybufferpanel)