The guy next to me in a coffee shop is
telling his date ‘You know you girls are all liars. Well, not all, but I’d say
80%. More than half.’
‘Girls think they have power over men by using sex as a bargaining chip and they don’t.‘
Now he’s telling her about a ‘psycho’
date he had who started telling him how ‘patronizing’ he was OUT OF NOWHERE
He’s a musician but he says he couldn’t date any of the ‘sheep’ who come to his gigs.
He’s been talking about himself literally nonstop since I sat down fifteen minutes ago. The scariest thing is the girl is listening actively, leaning forward, and smiling and giggling while I’m mentally screaming ‘Run, girl, run!’
Now he’s talking about gig he did for the troops in Afghanistan and how dangerous it was. ‘I could have been shot by a sniper at any second. But I was making people human. I was keeping them from going crazy. I was playing bass and crowd-surfing on my back. We were treated like ACDC. I had a prejudice about the military but you see the armed forces for what they are. They’re good people.’
He’s finally stopped telling her about the military and has gone back to covering every detail of his career. I still know absolutely nothing about his date.
Now he’s complaining about how bad the dancers were at one of his gigs (‘pathetic, ridiculous’).
Now he’s giving her a detailed history lesson on Greco-Turkish military conflict. I swear I’m not making any of this up.
Summary of the rest of the date:
Guy’s talking continues, relentless. Girl’s responses slowly growing more and more lackluster (unnoticed). Finally Guy gets up to use the bathroom. I casually say to Girl, ‘First date?’ A few seconds later, we’re recapping every obnoxious moment, literally holding onto each other, doubled over and gasping with laughter. ‘He hasn’t stopped talking since I sat down!’ ‘Oh my god, I’m so tired!’ ‘I mean, it’s your choice, but I wouldn’t go on a second date with that guy.’ More peals of laughter. ‘Oh my god, I’m so tired!’ ‘Not that I wanted to eavesdrop, but when he said all women were liars…’ ‘I know, right? I couldn’t believe it! I didn’t want to offend him, but…’ And so on. Finally: ‘Shh, here he comes.’
We straighten up and I pretend to be working on my laptop. Guy comes back to the table and they leave together. She waves at me behind his back.
If you’re on tumblr right this very second, you should know that even if times get rough you are still a fucking fantastic person and you deserve to have a great day.
Public Service Announcement: If you are not a virgin do not presume to wear a white wedding dress. It is an honor that is earned from chastity and virtue. Not a tradition for you to soil if you lacked the same.
what about anal? does it count
The idea that the white wedding dress is “an honor that is earned from chastity and virtue” is historically bullshit.
In the west the white wedding dress has it’s origins in the Victorian era, specifically in the white dress Queen Victoria wore in her marriage to Prince Albert. At the time, red was the most popular color for upper-class women to wear at their wedding, and her wedding dress was sort of the contemporary version of Lady Gaga wearing some outlandish outfit to a red carpet event. (She also eschewed the ermine and crown traditional for a queen to wear, which was quite startling to many people.)
After that, a pure white dress became a fashionable way for wealthy, upper-class women to show off their money. Because a pure white dress would quickly yellow and could be ruined by a single spill or a little dirt in an era before 20th century laundering techniques, a white wedding dress was a way of saying “that’s right bitches, I’m so rich I can afford to have this beautiful, elaborate gown made for me and I’m only going to wear it once. Plus odds are good I’ll never work a day in my life or come into contact with anything that might soil it so yeah, great to be me, right?”
Connotations of spiritual purity and eventually virginity only came years later, when the idea of a “white wedding” began to appear in etiquette and housekeeping guidebooks. Even then, it was more because these qualities were associated with upper-class women rather than because the white dress was an honor earned through keeping hands off one’s genitals. Even then, most women just wore their best church dress to their wedding for quite a while. It was the image of thew white wedding dress in post WWII Hollywood movies that finally cemented it as a standard and iconic part of the culture.
Nowadays of course, the American wedding is an orgy of conspicuous consumption, and every woman regardless of her financial situation is expected to get married in a dress she’ll never wear again.
tl;dr, that tradition you’re so keen on protecting has less to do with virginity than is does with showing off big wads of cash.
Poor people would traditionally wear their Sunday best to get married in. They were usually black, brown or other dark colours, because Sunday Best outfits had to last for years and be appropriate for all occasions, including funerals.
Reblogged for historical debunking
I’m always in favor of historical debunking that also gives the middle finger to Magical Virginity.
Hey op I love fucking and I’m gonna wear white to my wedding are you mad?
I love when Tumblr trashes troll bait with historical truth bombs. Also, having recently gotten married, I really wish we could go back to the “just wear your fave dress, k?” version of weddings. Because the pressure to spend thousands of dollars on a dress that you use once is horrible.
Interesting cause I always wanted to wear red to my wedding
OH MAN I FORGOT TO TELL YOU THE BEST THING THAT HAPPENED LAST NIGHT
So, last night was the conference mixer - at the bar with the 25-cent perogies. There was free food and beer, and because biologists tend to be less gregarious than our study species’, once the food was gone like 75% of the crowd left. The crew from my university stuck around because we’d discovered the pool tables, and also weren’t finished making clear how hard a bunch of saskies can demolish ‘all-you-can-eat perogy’ night. A handful of others stayed too - including one guy we’ve been calling Man-Bun all week because, well, he has a man-bun.
Now, admittedly we pre-judged this guy based on his hairstyle and mannerisms as probably having a 95% chance of being a douche, but because we’re all adults we didn’t really do anything about it and continued to be reasonably polite.
So at one point all the women in the room had gravitated to one corner, and Man-Bun came over and was like “Oh, we should take a group picture of all you guys, to put on the conference website for next year” (he is under the mistaken impression that his uni will get the conference next year, which it won’t if we have anything to say about it).
So we all group together, and he raises his camera phone, and he says
“Say ‘sexy bitches’!“
Now I’m not sure what experiences in his life had prepared him to expect a positive response to this statement from a bunch of female scientists, but…
The one guy from our crew was standing behind him, and he says all of our faces immediately curled into vicious snarls, like
Yesterday I learned that tampons were not originally created for ~feminine hygiene~ but for plugging up bullet wounds for WW1 and the nurses started using them and were like actually this is p effective and voila tampons thanks WW1
so what you’re saying is that tampon commercials should be shot like war films
Yes.
Are you saying that periods are equivalent to bullet wounds
i swear when i get older im gonna end up writing, like, auntie lia’s big big book of practical life advice for garbage humans
“remember, don’t take random pills you just find on the ground because you’re ‘curious what will happen’”, “never trust a psychiatrist”, “most ghosts will leave you alone if you just tell em to scram in a real assertive tone of voice”, “mix some salsa into the instant mac n cheese so you don’t get scurvy”, “lies it’s okay to tell in a job interview 101: an introduction”, “accepting the inevitable embrace of the grave, but not right this minute”, “diy haircuts for the broke, lazy, and/or sensorily hypersensitive”, “can’t i just glue it back together? a comprehensive guide to household items”
i can already taste the tens of dollars of revenue we will be making
Are you kidding, I can think of forty college juniors off the top of my head who would pay fifty bucks a pop for an Adulting 101 guide. And I go to a really small college.
This is a matter very close to my heart. I have bipolar I disorder and ADHD as a result of bipolar. There aren’t many big posts about studying with mental illnesses so I figured I would compile a huge list of tips and posts! I’m going to be making a video about this very soon. I hope for all of you struggling that this can help or at least remind you that mental health is more important than school sometimes. Take care of yourself in any way you can. lets get started…
Studying with Mental Illness
Take things slowly. Don’t be afraid to take a week doing one assignment. Making sure that you can focus on assignments can be draining so breaking them down day by day can truly help you. Make a task list with each portion of an assignment mapped out so that you can see exactly what you need to do. I know that i get overwhelmed very easily and seeing smaller things is less daunting then having a list full of HUGE things like research papers and midterms. Seeing it as “write paragraph one” or “review unit one vocab” makes everything less scary.
Nothing has to be pretty. Notes don’t, papers don’t have to be perfect, study guides don’t need to be colorful and cute. What really matters is getting things done. My mom always tells me “even an F is better than a zero” which is so true. Turning things in late is not shameful because you are still turning it in. You still did it and that is something to be proud of.
Study somewhere other than your room or your house. Make sure there are people there. Surrounding yourself with others will allow you to feel less isolated and sometimes more motivated to do things. You can’t take naps when you’re at a Panera or Starbucks either. People can be motivating, they can remind you that you are not alone, they can hold you accountable for what you have to do. Get out of your bed where you can sit and stare at the wall and go to a coffee shop or the library where other people are doing work. This always helps me get on track.
Study in short bursts. Don’t wear yourself out with work. Find out when your concentration peaks and go with that. I usually work the best around 2pm so I have to make sure that I have eaten and showered before then so that I can capture that time to focus on my studies.
Don’t beat yourself up. Studying just takes a lot more effort other days when depression hits you the worst. There might be days when you can barely get yourself out of bed but know that you do have the ability to succeed and that depression just has to suck sometimes.
Get yourself out of bed. Shower. Change your clothes. Read a single page. Look at only one thing you have to do so you aren’t overwhelmed. That is something to be proud of and know that I am proud of what you did!
Study in a routine style. Let yourself have a routine that you can fall into. Try pomodoros or study games, Create a routine that you can stick to
If you don’t feel like doing anything… work for 5 minutes. You may feel more motivated or up, or you will at least be able to say that you have done something.
HYDRATE. I’m really awful at drinking a lot of water, but it helps so much with both anxiety and depression. Water keeps you moving and awake. SO drink that H2O guys
I couldn’t find any resources about OCD, BPD, PTSD, or bipolar for that fact so keep on the lookout for any additions to this post if I find anything more! If all else fails, just google things. That always helps me. Message me personally if you have any questions about my struggles or need some specific advice! I love you all so much and I am so proud of you!! xx Haley
