beepboop-its-a-robot:

STORY TIME:

I work in a decent sized, local, indie bookstore. It’s a great job 99% of the time and a lot of our customers are pretty neat people. Any who, middle of the day this little old lady comes up. She’s lovably kooky. She effuses how much she loves the store and how she wishes she could spend more time in it but her husband is waiting in the car (OH! I BETTER BUY HIM SOME CHOCOLATE!), she piles a bunch of art supplies on the counter and then stops and tells me how my bangs are beautiful and remind her of the ocean (“Wooooosh” she says, making a wave gesture with her hand)

Ok. I think to myself. Awesomely happy, weird little old ladies are my favorite kind of customer. They’re thrilled about everything and they’re comfortably bananas. I can have a good time with this one. So we chat and it’s nice.

Then this kid, who’s been up my counter a few times to gather his school textbooks, comes up in line behind her (we’re connected to a major university in the city so we have a lot of harried students pass through). She turns around to him and, out of nowhere, demands that he put his textbooks on the counter. He’s confused but she explains that she’s going to buy his textbooks.

He goes sheetrock white. He refuses and adamantly insists that she can’t do that. It’s like, $400 worth of textbooks. She, this tiny old woman, bodily takes them out of her hands, throws them on the counter and turns to me with a intense stare and tells me to put them on her bill. The kid at this point is practically in tears. He’s confused and shocked and grateful. Then she turns to him and says “you need chocolate.” She starts grabbing handfuls of chocolates and putting them in her pile.

He keeps asking her “why are you doing this?” She responds “Do you like Harry Potter?“ and throws a copy of the new Cursed Child on the pile too.

Finally she’s done and I ring her up for a crazy amount of money. She pays and asks me to please give the kid a few bags for his stuff. While I’m bagging up her merchandise the kid hugs her. We’re both telling her how amazing she is and what an awesome thing she’s done. She turns to both of us and says probably one of the most profound, unscripted things I’ve ever had someone say:

“It’s important to be kind. You can’t know all the times that you’ve hurt people in tiny, significant ways. It’s easy to be cruel without meaning to be. There’s nothing you can do about that. But you can choose to be kind. Be kind.”

The kid thanks her again and leaves. I tell her again how awesome she is. She’s staring out the door after him and says to me: “My son is a homeless meth addict. I don’t know what I did. I see that boy and I see the man my son could have been if someone had chosen to be kind to him at just the right time.”

I’ve bagged up all her stuff and at this point am super awkward and feel like I should say something but I don’t know what. Then she turns to me and says: I wish I could have bangs like that but my darn hair is just too curly.“ And leaves.

And that is the story of the best customer I’ve ever had. Be kind to somebody today.

(via primarybufferpanel)

For those who need Epi-Pens but cannot afford them.

ceallaig1:

thememacat:

npd-anonymous:

I’ve been reading a great deal about the beyond unreasonable cost for the current main brand of Epi-Pens. I’d like to offer an alternative to those who simply cannot or perhaps will not pay such an exorbitant amount. Have your doctor write out your prescription (Rx) for Adrenaclick but sign “Substitution Allowed”, have the pharmacy order the generic of it from Lineage Therapeutics. The cost for these Epi-pens is $10 from Costco currently. Same pen, same medical chemical, but more reasonable price. Stay safe out there.

Signal Boosting!

Signal boost to save a life!

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

Anonymous asked: I hear you like mutant aus. I propose: Stranger Things Mutant Au

New system, kiddos: when I’m depressed, I’m going to write mutant AUs, because mutant AUs are good.  This is the decree.  If you want to see a specific one, send me an ask.  Also, ha, spot my favorite character, because I’m a fucking unsubtle trainwreck of a writer.

No one has mutant abilities at the beginning, you see.  Mutants are the stuff of comic books and stories, like Superman or magic or the Demigorgon.  So it’s four kids playing Dungeons and Dragons and four teenagers trying to figure out how to game the system enough to survive high school and a pair of adults fighting to keep their heads above water, and they are all—for a given value—perfectly normal.

And then things start to happen. And Eleven…well, she has a whole host of mutant powers, kickstarted by the drugs her mother took or by the experiments done on her or by the Upside Down.  Telekinesis, radio wave manipulation, dimensional travel—the whole gamut.

Keep reading

onewordtest:

fandom is so weird you never know how old anyone is but you just kinda assume most of them are around your age until proven otherwise and then one day someone is talking about their 9 year old kid on your dash and another person is saying they just finished 10th grade. wild.  

(via skymurdock)

fattyatomicmutant:
“ hobbitry-in-arms:
“ wandaluvstacos:
“ matthias-the-mighty:
“ wandaluvstacos:
“ inquisitorhierarch:
“ betterbemeta:
“ volfish:
“ evnw:
“ railroadsoftware:
“ handsomejackass:
“ horse people are weird
”
what does this mean
”
horses...

fattyatomicmutant:

hobbitry-in-arms:

wandaluvstacos:

matthias-the-mighty:

wandaluvstacos:

inquisitorhierarch:

betterbemeta:

volfish:

evnw:

railroadsoftware:

handsomejackass:

horse people are weird

what does this mean

horses can see demons

@betterbemeta are you able to translate this? Is it true horses can see netherbeings?? Will we ever know the extent of their powers???

I think I have reblogged this before but I’ll answer it again bc its a fascinating answer I feel and i was more funny than informational last time.

The truth is that horses see what they think are nether beings, I guess. They have a perfect storm of sensory perception that, useful for prey beings, marks false positives on mortal danger all the time. Which is advantageous to a flight-based prey species: running from danger when you’re super fast is much ‘cheaper’ than fighting, so you waste almost nothing from running from a threat that’s not there. Versus, you blow everything if you don’t see a threat that is there.

Horses also have their eyes positioned on the sides of their heads, which gives them an incredible range of peripheral vision almost around their entire body with only a few blind spots you can sneak up on them in. But this comes at the cost of binocular vision; they can only judge distance for things straight ahead of them. Super useful for preventing predators sneaking up from the sides or behind, but useless for recognizing familiar shapes with the precision we can.

Basically we now have a walking couch with anxiety its going to get attacked at any second, that can see almost everything, but mostly only out of the corner of its eye. It has a few blind spots and anything that suddenly appears out of them is terrifying to it. Combine that with that it actually has far superior low-light vision than us, and that its ears can swivel in any directions like radar dishes, and you’ve basically given a nervous wreck a highly accurate but imprecise danger-dar.

To be concise: all horses, even the most chill horses, on some level believe they are living in a survival horror.

This means that you could approach it in a flapping poncho and if it can’t recognize your shape as human, they mistake you for SATAN… or you could pass this one broken down tractor you’ve passed 100 times on a trail ride, but today is the day it will ATTACK… or your horse could feel a horsefly bite from its blind spot and MAMA, I’VE BEEN HIT!!!… or you could both approach a fallen log in the woods but in the low light your horse is going to see the tree rings as THE EYE OF MORDOR.

However, they actually have kind of a cool compensation for this– they are social animals, and instinctively look towards leadership. In the wild or out at pasture, this is their most willful, pushy, decisive leader horse who decides where to go and where it’s safe. But humans often take this role both as riders and on the ground. They are always watching and feeling for human reactions to things. This is why moving in a calm, decisive way and always giving clear commands is key to working with this kind of animal. Confusing commands, screaming, panic, visible distress, and chaos will signal to a horse that you, brave leader are freaked out… so it should freak out too!

On one hand, you’ll get horses that will decide that they are the leader and you are not, so getting them to listen to you can be tough– requiring patience and skill more than force. On the other hand, a good enough rider and a well-trained horse (or a horse with specialized training) can venture into dangerous situations, loud and scary environments, etc. calmly and confidently.

The joke in OP though is that many horses that are bred to be very fast, like thoroughbreds, are also bred and encouraged to be high-energy and highstrung. Making them more anxious and prone to seeing those ‘demons.’ All horses in a sense are going to be your anxious friend, but racehorses and polo ponies and other sport horses can sometimes be your anxious friend that thinks they live in Silent Hill.

Reblogging some horse knowledge for certain people who write fantasy books but know nothing about horses *cough cough*

This is more of a joke on Thoroughbreds than horses in general. Thoroughbreds are stereotypically scared of everything. 

Like, if I wanted to do this meme with Appaloosas I’d be like

lol I love Appaloosas so much

and meanwhile all ponies are just satan incarnate

I found a quality pony meme:

It is fucking amazing that people managed to get horses to regularly RIDE INTO BATTLES in the olden days of war honestly

Every time I see a cavalry charge in an old war movie I’m like “God look at those horses ignoring every fear instinct in their bodies like some motherfucking heroes”

Imagine someone rewriting Horse Club as a Survival horror from the horses perspective

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

Moran Rereads the Animorphs

Book 4: The Message

AKA “The PTSD squad gets a sixth member, the first named character gets dismembered, and whales are awesome”

Keep reading

littlestartopaz:

bogleech:

vanishedschism:

pristinely-ungifted:

loveinthemindpalace:

bogleech:

the-emileighain-mountains:

railroadsoftware:

sonypraystation:

railroadsoftware:

did anyone actually ever read those animorph books

just stared at the covers for a concerningly long amount of time before putting it back where i found it

me too

Same

Here are some of the spoilers you missed out on by not reading Animorphs:

  • Five children are forced to engage in guerilla warfare, espionage and repeated murder to protect their loved ones from alien parasites as they wait for the other, heroic aliens to finally arrive. When they do, the “good” aliens turn out to not give a shit about humans, caused the whole intergalactic war through their own shittiness and are willing to exterminate whole planets themselves to get at their hated enemies.
  • A child repeatedly experiences his intestines hanging out of his body while in various animal forms
  • A child is mentally tortured until broken and never gets better
  • A child in the form of a fly experiences getting splattered and smeared against a ceiling until his friends who are also flies at the time can peel his body off and take him somewhere he can transform back into a whole human before his insect mind fades completely
  • A child is shrunken and experiences having her eyeballs digested out of her head inside her friend’s stomach while she’s in the form of a tiny elephant
  • The heroes are forced to permanently imprison another child in the body of a rat because he knows too much and they abandon him on a tiny island with only other rats and garbage for company. Rumors circulate that the island is haunted but it’s actually his psychic screams reaching distant boaters.
  • A race of devastatingly powerful, violent aliens turn out to be mental toddlers who don’t know what they’re doing and are just bred to think they’re playing one big game before they’re killed at age three so they don’t learn the truth
  • An alien spends a few centuries hanging from the parasitic tentacle of a much bigger alien, surrounded by millions of rotting corpses attached to its other moon-spanning tendrils. They engage in mental warfare until one finally absorbs the other completely.
  • It turns out another seemingly “evil” alien race is simply driven to kill and eat everything in sight because it was separated from its original world where food was continuous and the entire specie’s life is the torture of perpetual starvation
  • A peaceful robot willingly removes its inhibition against violence to help in the war, only to slaughter a huge number of alien-controlled humans so gruesomely that nobody dares think about or speak of it again and it is the only thing left undescribed in a book series that already describes entrails getting torn out and skulls getting smashed
  • A child stays too long in the form of a flea and instead of turning back into a human, accidentally turns momentarily into one big, giant flea that can only writhe and moan because it shouldn’t exist and can’t live at that scale.
  • The kids discover Atlantis, then discover that Atlanteans are inbred mutants who paralyze any humans they find, dissect them alive to figure out how their organs work, then stuff the corpses as kitschy museum displays for their children.
  • An ordinary ant gets transformed into a human child. It has no idea what’s happening and is so overwhelmed by its huge new brain and sensory input that it can only scream until it dies

What. The. Fuck

From someone who recently read/finished this series, NONE OF THE ABOVE IS AN EXAGGERATION.

Also you can get all the PDFs here

Everybody read some animorphs you know you wanna it’s right there

Go ahead and start on book one you’ll already get some juicy terror

Let’s not forget 5 of them are almost eaten alive by ants. For one of them, this happens twice though she doesn’t remember, because it happened in a weird aborted time line where they all die.

I would like to add that I am taking notes this time around and I discovered that the very first murder of a named character (it’s rather grisly, he gets eaten alive and his scraps snatched up by the above eternally-starving aliens, while the protagonists try not to get caught and murdered a handful of feet away) occurs less than 40 pages into the first book.  Also, the first dismemberment happens less than four books in.

*fond sigh*  These books were my childhood, guys.

(via littlestartopaz)

we have been blessed, the future is bright, my crops are watered, my pores are clear, my anxiety is eased

platinumtaylor:

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

wait….WHAT UHM

eXCUSE ME DID SOMEONE SAY REAL LIFE AND FICTIONAL DIVERSITY WAIT WHAT

A FAMOUS BLACK WOMAN SCIENTIST WAS CONSULTED?! HOLY FUCK?!

MMMM YEESSS give me that hierarchical diversity too, fuller

#REVENGEGAY

cannot forget our AI friends 🙌

god bless that continuity

RESPONSIBLE FRANCHISE ADOPTION 101

HE GETS IT!!!!

and the most important….the equivalent of bones will FINALLY GET TO SAY FUCK

ahhhhhhhhhhhh

(via lesbianplaid)

thingsfortwwings:

toodrunktofindaurl:

theoryofwar:

milgramexperiment:

tall people: if we are walking together please take into consideration my tiny legs. i cant keep up with you. please think of my tiny legs i dont want to be jogging to keep up with your leisurely stroll you TITANS

Just get a pair of roller skates and hang on to my sleeve, we don’t have all day.

[Image: Patty Tolan and walking and hauling Jillian Holtzmann behind her on roller skates.]

(Source: fakeandinspace, via primarybufferpanel)

halfhardtorock:

zoewashburne:

jewishkarkat:

are u the “i gotta to save everyone” protagonist or the “i did not sign up for this shit” protagonist

#like i did not sign up for this shit but i’m gotta save everyone but i’m gonna be really bitter about doing it

Originally posted by blackdogs-world

(via dubiousculturalartifact)