With a screenplay by Rhianna Pratchett, daughter of Terry Pratchett, we’re finally going to see an adaptation of The Wee Free Men.
The Wee Free Men introduced Tiffany Aching, the young witch who starred in several of Pratchett’s last Discworld books. It also features a group of Discworld characters who seem absolutely perfect for a Jim Henson movie: the Nac Mac Feegle, a community of foul-mouthed and gleefully violent gnomes.
Boyfriend:
I... I don't even know the story that well babe, I can't even say xD
Me:
Okay so
Me:
Poseidon gives a bull to King Minos, the best and shiniest bull you ever saw, and he's like "You can have this, but only if you promise to sacrifice it to me later" and Minos is like "Sure yeah okay man whatever" so Poseidon sends this bestest bull ever galloping up out of the salty sea spray, and everyone standing around is like "Hot fuck look at that bull" And Minos agrees, and he likes the bull SO much he decides to just quietly sort of...keep it. And he does kill a bull for Poseidon but it's one of his own, lame normal bulls, and Poseidon's no pushover so of course he notices.
Me:
Poseidon is also notoriously easily angered, and he's royal pissed about this, so he comes up with one of the most devious punishments ever, and he infects Minos' wife Pasiphae with a desperate, DESPERATE thirst for the bull. Like she can think of nothing but getting some of that hot Bull D.
Boyfriend:
..........Thefuck.
Me:
But it's hard to convince a bull, especially a divinely spawned bull, to fuck you if you are in fact not a cow but a human queen, so she comes up with a plan
Boyfriend:
I thought some god comes down in bull form and fucks her??
Me:
Ohh, no no no, that's the much much more tame story of Europa, who has sex with Zeus in bull form. This is different
Me:
She goes to the best inventor she knows, Daedalus, and she's like "I need this bull to fuck me I NEED IT" and Daedalus is like "That's really weird maybe you should talk to someone" and she's like "I am talking to you and I am your queen so you better fucking make this happen for me I am going to peel my own skin off if I don't get some bull dick ASAP. But he doesn't want me because I am not fat, four-legged, and mooing."
Boyfriend:
Oh..... oh no.
Me:
So Daedalus shrugs, probably shudders a little, and builds the prettiest, most fuckable wooden cow a bull over saw, but he makes it hollow, presumably with some openings in some awkward places.
Boyfriend:
OH GOD. NO.
Me:
So Pasiphae puts this monstrosity in the field with the bull, climbs in it, and waits. And Daedalus really is a skilled inventor, and he apparently knows what a bull likes, because Pasiphae finally gets the hot bull loving she's been dreaming of
Boyfriend:
I........ I need an aspirin. That is disgusting.
Me:
Only she apparently hasn't been tracking her cycles, because she gets pregnant, and births the minotaur and King Minos is like "What the fuck?" and Pasiphae is like "Honey I need to tell you something"
Anonymous asked: Cliffhangers are literally the worst??? I mean??? Why? Why would you do this????
Okay, there’s the ‘I’m a dick’ answer which is “I like to make people (especially my roommate) suffer.” And there’s the ‘I’m a writer’ answer, which is “The next good break point was going to be like five pages down the line and this chapter was already longer than my average goal for this story.” And then there’s the ‘life is time-consuming’ answer, which is “I wanted to get the chapter out before I was a billion.”
I mean, take your pick, they’re all perfectly true.
You are not screaming into the void in vain. The void is just practicing active listening and wants you to let it all out without feeling like it is judging or trying to speak over you
Didn’t think I’d find myself agreeing with Count Dooku but here I am.
Okay but he’s honestly 100% right.
Wasn’t this addressed though? In the Phantom Menace, Padmé specifically says, “The Republic outlaws slavery-” but Anakins’ mom outright states, “The Republic doesn’t exist out here.” Tatooine’s governing body was the hutt empire, a separate entity from the Republic.
As for Yoda, his edict of the Jedi order being servants rather than rulers meant that while he could challenge policies set by the senate, it was up to his dispatched Jedi Knights to combat the injustice wherever it could be found, but the Jedi did not have police priveledges so they found it very hard to investigate for proof of corruption, only when they witnessed it firsthand would they be able to intervene, specifically so they would avoid a situation like the ending of Revenge of the Sith.
The Hutts were never established in on-screen canon as being separate from the republic, while Tatoonie is implied to be relatively close too Naboo, a confirmed member world. In expanded universe continuity, Tatooine has always been part of the Galactic Republic, regardless of which continuity. Hutt Space was also part of the Galactic Republic in legends, later breaking away following the collapse of the Empire.
Shmi’s comment about the republic not existing on Tatooine is meant to reflect that because it’s not a centre of power or trade, those in the republic takes no notice of it, do nothing for it, and they’re so far away the population never see anything the republic does affecting anything. In essence, they’re on their own, bowing to the criminal cartels just to scrape by.
If you go back and rewatch the prequels without viewing him through the lens of “oh it’s that lovable old frog that teaches Luke and talks silly” prequel Yoda is actually a giant asshole.
“In the novelization, it is made clear that Yoda, being the oldest
and most respected member of the Jedi Order, has essentially made it
(and its rules) in his own image over the past eight centuries. There
is no debate on these rules, there is no dissent permitted, and it is
quite clear that membership in the Jedi Council is contingent upon
being a meekly agreeable Yoda Yes-Man, which is why Qui-Gon Jinn
never made it into the club.
“If Star Wars Episode 3 is a Greek tragedy, then Anakin Skywalker
is not its only tragic figure. Yoda, for all his supposed wisdom,
preaches the virtue of selflessness not because he believes he should
help others, but because that’s the Code. The Code now exists for its
own sake, and over the centuries, he’s forgotten why. In Episode 1,
Qui-Gon Jinn would obviously like to help Anakin and his mother
escape slavery on Tatooine, but it’s beyond his mandate, and he’s
breaking the rules to save even one of them. Why is it beyond his
mandate? Because the Jedi Order has no particular mandate to help
people. Its only mandate is to keep the peace and uphold the
Code. That’s Yoda’s Code, and when Anakin asks him what to do about
an impending tragedy, he gives the most useless advice in history:
“train yourself to let go”. Thanks a lot, Yoda. I ask you
how to stop a tragedy and you tell me to just smile and let it
happen.
“Of what use is a moral code if it does not tell you to help
others? That is a question which Yoda apparently never thought to
ask. Even in Episode 5, when Luke wants to go save his friends, Yoda
counsels him to let them die. It is advice that Luke ignores, to his
credit. Yoda is not an evil person, but he is not a caring person
either. For him, morality is not about caring for others, but about
simply following the rules.The biggest problem with “blind obedience to rules” as a
moral code is that the instant someone loses faith in those rules,
the whole house of cards comes crashing down and they literally don’t
know right from wrong. In real-life this phenomenon is often referred
to as “preacher’s daughter syndrome”, where a girl has been
raised with a lifetime of strict preaching without understanding, so
when she gets old enough to question authority she promptly gets
herself into serious trouble. Yoda obviously never saw Anakin’s fall
coming, because after eight centuries of indoctrinating Jedi from
infancy, he simply couldn’t imagine a Jedi not having the same blind
faith in the rules that he did. Love, jealousy, hate, anger are all
emotions, all passions, all paths to the Dark Side, but caring and
sympathy are emotions too, and Yoda threw out the baby with the
bathwater.” - Michael ‘Darth’ Wong, creator of Stardestroyer.net
Seemed relevant.
Yoda may have basically written the codes because, with his long life, he could wait until his opponents just died and bring up his points again with less disagreement (because he taught the other Jedi, of course).
If Sanders doesn’t get the nomination, and you can’t see yourself voting for Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump, then don’t. Vote third party.
Consider the Libertarian or Green Party.
Don’t feed the establishment by voting for Clinton, and don’t feed authoritarian isolationism by voting for Trump.
No. The absolute largest chunk of people considering changing their votes at the moment are disappointed non-conservatives. There was barely any competition among republicans; from the get-go, the voter base united behind Trump. If non-conservatives split their votes across multiple fronts, they WILL lose.
Voting third party in America throws your vote directly into the garbage. Our system does not work like Australia’s. You don’t get a second or third choice, and candidates who win aren’t going to look at the numbers and say “I see 25% of Americans voted Green, I should implement Green policies.” That’s not how it works. Conservative voters overwhelmingly back a single party, the GOP, while non-conservative voters are the ones that scatter across multiple, weak fronts when faced with an unappealing Democratic party nominee. Think about it like this:
The majority of Republican voters support Trump and are not changing their vote even though party leaders and figureheads are universally decrying him. They’ve been groomed for decades by the GOP to be this way, and now party leaders have lost control of the impressionable voter base they created for themselves. There’s nothing they can do about it at this point. While a small number of Republicans can and are switching parties, it’s not very much. Meanwhile, Democrats are floundering, trying to decide which front to unite under. Some of them go to the Green party or Libertarians, sure; the rest stay with the Democratic party in the hopes that even with people leaving, they will have enough to block Trump. But Trump doesn’t need a majority of total Americans to vote for him; he only needs more than the other candidates have. Do you understand what I’m saying? Trump could get 10% of the vote, but as long as no other party has more than 10%, he still wins. The second you split the left and middle across three or four fronts, the right seizes control. This is how it goes down every single fucking time we go through this.
The other thing to consider is that the electoral college is NOT going to weigh in favor of a third party. Doing so would be political suicide. They are paid to vote certain ways, and not doing so would fuck up their careers. Even if an entire state votes in favor of a third party, the electoral college is going to vote for whichever primary party matches up the closest, and sometimes not even that. Their votes are counted when making the actual choice of president; ours are not. They proved that with Gore. The majority of Americans voted for him; the electoral college installed Bush anyway and told us to suck it up. The question at this point is whether they’d risk it a second time, and we have to hope that they won’t, which is why we have to unite under a single front to block Trump.
^^^^^^^THIS!!!!!!!!!! People do not understand that under our plurality system, it doesn’t matter if the majority of the population doesn’t vote for Trump. As long as he has more than any of the other candidates, he wins. Splitting up the more liberal voters is now what non-Trump supporters want to do.
DO NOT SPLIT THE VOTE, PLEASE! GOP is gonna vote Trump, they won’t vote for a 3rd party person. That means a solid voting bloc. Dem who split the vote are in essence giving him a free vote. HILARY WITH ALL HER FAULTS IS STILL BETTER THAN TRUMP!
“In a healthy relationship, your partner hears you out if you’re upset, and their goal is to avoid upsetting you in the future, not to debate whether you should have been upset in the first place.”
