“You can’t have a character with big boobs and not sexualise them”
“There aren’t any feminist female characters that want to do things that are typically feminine”
“There aren’t any badass gay characters”
“There aren’t any cool/badass disabled characters”
“Okay well what about disabled POC characters?”
“There are no interesting or complex villains! None that ever question their morals, or have an interesting motive”
“There aren’t any women characters that don’t just do things for men”
“I want a poc character that fights against racism”
“There aren’t any cool characters that aren’t young and healthy”
“There are no male characters that like feminine things”
Need I go on? Go watch Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood.
Fullmetal alchemist also tackled the issues of imperialism, genocide, PTSD, friendly fire, racism, war brutality, and military corruption unflinchingly. “Most military commanders are killed by their own disgusted soldiers.” indeed.
at this point reading about post-Brexit news is like following the unfolding of a very nasty and painful breakup, where everyone involved is shouting and throwing furniture out of the window. The UK wants to talk about custody and alimony first, but the EU is seething and asking the UK to take all of its stuff and get the fuck out of their house ASAP, Scotland is taking EU’s side and telling England: look, we’ll always be neighbors and friends but you fucked up so we’re moving out, Northern Ireland is thinking to move in with their folks again, the racist aunt who never liked the couple is celebrating by kicking kids out of her yard, the markets are crashing drunk on the sidewalk and losing money like I lose bobby pins, whereas the rest of us, children of divorce from both sides of the Channel, are left weeping, confused, abandoned, wandering toward an uncertain future and thoroughly fucked over by our parents.
it baffles me that theres people who can just… just sit down and take out their homework and be like “time to work yes” and actually…get things done???? without a problem??? and move on?????? thats wild
skymurdock asked: hello I am here to tell you about Worst Time Traveller Han Solo, possibly post-TFA, grumpily rolling through the Clone Wars and accidentally earning a Reputation for knowing, strangely, exactly where to invest his money and what to do when confronted with Completely Unexpected Events. also, for some reason, he keeps running into baby-Vader a lot. STOP SHOOTING AT ME, yells Anakin, possibly just before they find themselves in another hot mess. sorry, force of habit, says Han.
also, at least once, somebody’s like “ok dude you’re a bit TOO accurate with your blaster shots as Anakin keeps complaining, lemme take your midichlorian count” “midi WHAT NOW” “I mean, you’re clearly Force-sensitive” “NO I’M NOT IT’S LUCK.”
Anakin has found his next Padawan! (Bonus if timetraveler!Han is the biological age he would have been during the actual Clone Wars - which would have been between five and ten, I think. )
okay, so you’ve got two very interesting ways that could pan out:
ONE. Han Solo either remains the same age he was when he died or the same age he was post-ROTJ when he’s dragged back in time to the Clone Wars. he wakes up somewhere on the planet that Starkiller Base used to be way back in the Clone Wars with lots of vibrant green forests and even a small thriving spaceport, finds some poor sonuvabitch with a ship, and talks his way onto it. conveniently, shit goes down and they crash-land on a planet being battled over by the Separatists and the Republic, and Han somehow finds himself face-to-face with Anakin goddamn motherfucking Skywalker.
he spends like a day in the brig of a Republic cruiser with a nasty bruise bc he shot at baby-Vader out of instinct. (that’s what he will forever use to refer to Anakin Skywalker in his head. Anakin is pissed bc of the baby part, mostly. Han is goggling at him.)
also, he prob uses a false alias, bc Han Solo currently is a tiny eight-year-old happily rolling around on Corellia.
TWO. Han Solo wakes up eight years old, on Corellia, and spends about ten minutes screaming into his pillow because NOT AGAIN. and then he v quietly runs away from home - it’s fine bc home is kind of terrible, anyway - and stows away onto a ship.
the ship gets shot down over a Separatist-controlled planet, Han finds a blaster, and then runs right into Anakin goddamn motherfucking Skywalker. Anakin, seeing a small eight-year-old stowaway, immediately decides to try and get this kid out of this absolute warzone. Han shoots at him and misses bc eight-year-old body does not have the muscle memory and rock-solid aim of seventy-plus-year-old body.
and then Anakin has to save this tiny little runaway child who is also beating angrily on his chest like LEMME GO and screaming obscenities that children should not know but smugglers-turned-war heroes-turned-smugglers again do. Han does not know what the hell kind of shit he’s landed himself in this time, but he does know he has a Very Bad Feeling about all this.
A tiny, foul-mouthed little orphan brat who knows things he shouldn’t, is far more skilled then he should be for his age, had a bad attitude, constantly surprises people, is insubordinate to the extreme, probably makes Obi-Wan and Anakin look at him very sharply indeed when he states he has a Bad Feeling about something, is obviously Strong with the Force…
It’s Anakin Skywalker mark 2.0. (Anakin is not certain why everyone is looking at him.)
(Of course Han is slated to be Anakin’s next padawan. He fights tooth and nail against it - be probably insults the High Council to their faces, and keeps trying to run away.)
Han does not WANT to be anyone’s padawan, especially not - UGH - baby-Vader’s, UGH. he just wants to find his ship and his first mate and also probably keep the galaxy from careening into a trash fire like it did before. he develops a habit of running off on missions - bc for some weird reason he does not ever actually stay at the Jedi Temple for more than a few days despite everyone’s best attempts to keep him there and actually teach him how to use the Force for things that aren’t CHEATING AT CARDS - and on one of these occasions comes back with a ship that he claims to know how to fly.
Anakin spends all of a day silently doubting him until they have to get OFF the planet and he is somehow injured and can’t pilot, so Han takes over for him and does something completely goddamn insane like - dive into an asteroid field, like he’s done it before.
(meanwhile Han is trying v desperately to pilot this brand-new non-modified version of his beloved Falcon without thinking of all the times he and Leia were in this same cockpit together. oh god he misses Leia. oh god baby-Vader is next to him yelling watch out for the asteroid like HE DOESN’T FUCKING KNOW SHUT UP.)
Anakin, you have no room to talk considering the whole ‘won a space battle at age ten’ thing. And the podracing thing. AND the illegal swoop bike racing in Coruscant thing. And your ENTIRE ADULT LIFE thing.
Han’s habit of running away - well, trying to run away - dies the second he is introduced to Senator Padme Amidala. Han probably takes one look at her and knows - and then promptly starts trying to desperately set up baby-Vader and the Senator. (He doesn’t know that they’re married, he just wants Leia and Luke born ASAP, is that too much to ask?!)
lbr Anakin can be kind of hypocritical sometimes, oops.
oh, lord. Han looks at Padme Amidala, then at Anakin, and the clearly besotted way they look at each other when the other is not looking, and comes to the right conclusion that they are In Love and the wrong conclusion that, bc of the whole Jedi thing, neither of them are acting on it.
and he wants Luke and Leia conceived YESTERDAY, so. he finds a way to trick both of them into a closet, lock the door, and then run off. two birds, one stone, he reasons, bc if baby-Vader is too busy getting busy with the Senator then Palpatine can’t get to him and if Palpatine can’t get to him then nothing goes straight into the shitcan and Luke and Leia will be born! it’s a brilliant plan.
Palpatine, meanwhile, is wondering why Anakin is running late for his meeting, and is seriously side-eyeing the shit out of this tiny baby padawan who Knows Too Much, clearly.
(Ahsoka shows up, at one point, possibly during a mission that went rapidly FUBAR on the same planet she was on and quickly grows to like Anakin’s new padawan. he’s Weird but he clearly knows what he’s doing! maybe a little too well.)
“it would be impossible for this disabled character to be played by a disabled actor because of the things this character can do in this movie” well then maybe…… you fucked up in the writing of this disabled character……
also cgi exists. if you need your disabled character to walk for a couple of scenes use a body double and green screen. this can also be used for trans characters prior to transition.
if it’s possible to make chris evans look 5ft nothing and skinnier than a maypole then it’s possible to cast disabled actors for disabled characters
As the kid of a doctor and a biologist, let me tell you something that just miiight go over some people’s (*cough cough terfs*) heads:
- XX and XY (or any other combinations - there are others) chromosomes are a thing and are medically important
- genitals are a thing and are medically important
- horomones are a thing and are medically important
- the idea of a “biological sex” is still completely unnecessary. If you have XX chromosomes, you can tell your doctor that. If you have a penis, you can tell your doctor that. If you have high levels of both estrogen/testosterone, your doctor should probably know that already but I guess if you go to a new one you can tell them that. There is no situation in which one has to say “I am biologically male/female”
^say it a little louder for the transphobic educators who tried to tell students otherwise
I teach intro biology labs at the college level, and I try really hard to get all of this through my students’ heads at the earliest possible opportunity. The biological definition of a sex is l i t e r a l l y just:
Does this organism produce: many tiny energetically cheap gametes, or few large energetically expensive gametes?
That’s literally it. There’s no other qualifiers, there’s no other anatomical characteristics involved in that definition, and even that scientific distinction exists on a spectrum! No species of animal ever 100% across-the-board conforms to this sexually dimorphic biological system! There will always be individuals of any largely gametically-dimorphic species that exist somewhere in-between, and there are a number species where the sexes all produce gametes of similar sizes!
IN NO WAY EVER does even that gamete size distinction ever confer gender upon anyone. Chromosomes and genitals and hormones ARE medically important, but these characteristics NEVER dictate gender, and they’re NEVER anyone’s business but your own unless you choose to involve another person in discussions of your strictly physical health.
There is no such thing as being “biologically [gender]”. The idea is a toxic social construct, and don’t let anyone try to shoehorn you into believing otherwise.
skymurdock asked: hello I am here to tell you about Worst Time Traveller Han Solo, possibly post-TFA, grumpily rolling through the Clone Wars and accidentally earning a Reputation for knowing, strangely, exactly where to invest his money and what to do when confronted with Completely Unexpected Events. also, for some reason, he keeps running into baby-Vader a lot. STOP SHOOTING AT ME, yells Anakin, possibly just before they find themselves in another hot mess. sorry, force of habit, says Han.
also, at least once, somebody’s like “ok dude you’re a bit TOO accurate with your blaster shots as Anakin keeps complaining, lemme take your midichlorian count” “midi WHAT NOW” “I mean, you’re clearly Force-sensitive” “NO I’M NOT IT’S LUCK.”
Anakin has found his next Padawan! (Bonus if timetraveler!Han is the biological age he would have been during the actual Clone Wars - which would have been between five and ten, I think. )
okay, so you’ve got two very interesting ways that could pan out:
ONE. Han Solo either remains the same age he was when he died or the same age he was post-ROTJ when he’s dragged back in time to the Clone Wars. he wakes up somewhere on the planet that Starkiller Base used to be way back in the Clone Wars with lots of vibrant green forests and even a small thriving spaceport, finds some poor sonuvabitch with a ship, and talks his way onto it. conveniently, shit goes down and they crash-land on a planet being battled over by the Separatists and the Republic, and Han somehow finds himself face-to-face with Anakin goddamn motherfucking Skywalker.
he spends like a day in the brig of a Republic cruiser with a nasty bruise bc he shot at baby-Vader out of instinct. (that’s what he will forever use to refer to Anakin Skywalker in his head. Anakin is pissed bc of the baby part, mostly. Han is goggling at him.)
also, he prob uses a false alias, bc Han Solo currently is a tiny eight-year-old happily rolling around on Corellia.
TWO. Han Solo wakes up eight years old, on Corellia, and spends about ten minutes screaming into his pillow because NOT AGAIN. and then he v quietly runs away from home - it’s fine bc home is kind of terrible, anyway - and stows away onto a ship.
the ship gets shot down over a Separatist-controlled planet, Han finds a blaster, and then runs right into Anakin goddamn motherfucking Skywalker. Anakin, seeing a small eight-year-old stowaway, immediately decides to try and get this kid out of this absolute warzone. Han shoots at him and misses bc eight-year-old body does not have the muscle memory and rock-solid aim of seventy-plus-year-old body.
and then Anakin has to save this tiny little runaway child who is also beating angrily on his chest like LEMME GO and screaming obscenities that children should not know but smugglers-turned-war heroes-turned-smugglers again do. Han does not know what the hell kind of shit he’s landed himself in this time, but he does know he has a Very Bad Feeling about all this.
A tiny, foul-mouthed little orphan brat who knows things he shouldn’t, is far more skilled then he should be for his age, had a bad attitude, constantly surprises people, is insubordinate to the extreme, probably makes Obi-Wan and Anakin look at him very sharply indeed when he states he has a Bad Feeling about something, is obviously Strong with the Force…
It’s Anakin Skywalker mark 2.0. (Anakin is not certain why everyone is looking at him.)
(Of course Han is slated to be Anakin’s next padawan. He fights tooth and nail against it - be probably insults the High Council to their faces, and keeps trying to run away.)
Han does not WANT to be anyone’s padawan, especially not - UGH - baby-Vader’s, UGH. he just wants to find his ship and his first mate and also probably keep the galaxy from careening into a trash fire like it did before. he develops a habit of running off on missions - bc for some weird reason he does not ever actually stay at the Jedi Temple for more than a few days despite everyone’s best attempts to keep him there and actually teach him how to use the Force for things that aren’t CHEATING AT CARDS - and on one of these occasions comes back with a ship that he claims to know how to fly.
Anakin spends all of a day silently doubting him until they have to get OFF the planet and he is somehow injured and can’t pilot, so Han takes over for him and does something completely goddamn insane like - dive into an asteroid field, like he’s done it before.
(meanwhile Han is trying v desperately to pilot this brand-new non-modified version of his beloved Falcon without thinking of all the times he and Leia were in this same cockpit together. oh god he misses Leia. oh god baby-Vader is next to him yelling watch out for the asteroid like HE DOESN’T FUCKING KNOW SHUT UP.)
Anakin, you have no room to talk considering the whole ‘won a space battle at age ten’ thing. And the podracing thing. AND the illegal swoop bike racing in Coruscant thing. And your ENTIRE ADULT LIFE thing.
Han’s habit of running away - well, trying to run away - dies the second he is introduced to Senator Padme Amidala. Han probably takes one look at her and knows - and then promptly starts trying to desperately set up baby-Vader and the Senator. (He doesn’t know that they’re married, he just wants Leia and Luke born ASAP, is that too much to ask?!)
Oh my god everything about this.
Han Solo: Angriest Padawan in the Order. Space baby. Refusing to use a lightsaber and instead being /insane/ with a Blaster.
The Clones adore his face.
I’m not a big fan of Force Strong Han. I tend to headcanon him as being important to balancing the Force, but not Strong in the Force. The Force is with him, but he can’t use it. If that makes sense. But I would make an exception for this story.
Padme thinks he’s adorable. She also thinks he has a crush on her, and because he’s late to the Jedi, he thinks the best way to deal with it is to get his Master and the Lady together.
She and Anakin talk about it, and she gets Anakin to humor Han. And the way Han beams when Anakin is around her is obvious. Eight year old matchmaker, even if he is a foulmouthed one.
And can you imagine Han reacting to Yoda? Or Dooku? Or Palpatine. Palpatine might get a lot of bad language. A ton of bad language. (Anakin had a premonition, he took Han’s blaster away before they met with the Chancellor, or there would be blaster fire.)
Padmé thinks Anakin’s new padawan is v lovely. Han actually splutters bc holy shit this is Leia’s MOM. holy shit he needs to find a way to get these two together, fuck what the Jedi Order says about attachments, Luke and Leia’s very existence DEPENDS ON HIM. and he will ensure it by locking the senator and baby Vader into a closet.
he does it regularly. strangely, he does it whenever he hears Anakin talking about meeting with the Chancellor. “I have no idea where Anakin went,” he says, and it is a baldfaced LIE.
that first meeting with Palpatine goes - badly. Han has to be carted off before he can kick Palpatine’s shin v hard, which prob tips Palpatine off to the fact that Han Solo might know something he should not.
