You’re safe.
There’s nothing chasing you. There won’t be a face in the window. Nothing is following you up the stairs. Nothing is under your bed. You can throw your legs over your bed, you can have your arm over the side of the bed, because nothing is out to get you. I promise. I’m here to protect you. I’ll kick its ass.
You’re safe.
This just really helped me oh my God
(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
you know, when Steve introduces himself in TWS, Sam laughs and says “I’d put that together.” which makes sense because no normal human can run like that.
but like WHEN did he put it together? how many laps did it take before it dawned on him? at what point did Sam Wilson suddenly realize that he was being TROLLED BY CAPTAIN AMERICA
I SUDDENLY VERY MUCH NEED TO KNOW THIS.
No seriously, don’t sit there and go “Moran you’re so cute,” talk to me about Sam, who’s tired because…well, he works at the VA, with people like him, people who’ve seen the worst humanity has to offer, who’ve lost friends so close they were more than family, whose beds are too hard and who sometimes struggle to see the light, maybe even some people who, like him, are torn between blessed relief at being away from the fight and the deep thrum of the march in their souls. And about how Sam’s tired, physically tired because he can’t sleep, mentally weary from his work, which is rewarding sometimes but not often, emotionally exhausted because some part of him kind of misses it, misses the fight, so Sam runs, and maybe that seems backwards but he used to be able to fly and that’s something he’s not really allowed to tell people (which sucks, by the way, national security his fine black ass) and running is almost like flight. Except it’s not, at all.
Talk to me about how Sam’s been running the same damn laps every morning since he got home and he would actually almost be okay with some jackass starting shit on the street because it would be something to do. Talk to me about how Sam ran at a reasonable hour at first (military man or not, he doesn’t get along with mornings) but there were so many people, mothers jogging with strollers, tourists wandering and just getting in the way, bicycles everywhere, and he likes people fine, sure, he’s one charming son of a bitch if he does say so himself (he doesn’t actually, because his mama would still whup his ass if she heard him), but not when they’re interfering with his run. And about how Sam starts inching his run earlier and earlier until he’s seeing the damn sunrise again, but he’s running with one or two other folks who give him a businesslike nod and a brisk warning so they don’t collide and he likes that a lot better because no one should really be expected to be social that early in the morning.
Talk to me about how one morning this random guy with blond hair and a jaw like a goddamn Adonis and shoulders so wide you could put the whole Lincoln memorial on top of them starts running at an ungodly hour with the scant few of them who are out by then, and he runs in this bizarrely delicate way that should be exhausting but clearly isn’t because this guy is fucking booking it like the proverbial bat out of hell. Talk to me about how at first Sam’s just blown away, too blown away to really even think about it as this random blond god blazes past him again and again (he almost doesn’t mind at first because it’s an absolute pleasure to watch the man leave him in the dust–Sam’s a good looking guy, and he knows it, but the guy’s ass is something else). And about how at first it gets to be this habit: go for run, get whipped by random blond dude, politely ogle blond dude’s ass as he runs past, leave with an appreciation for the good things in life and a healthily lowered ego. About how Sam gets to almost be weird non-friends-but-kind-of-work-out-buddies with Random Blond Guy over a week or so, who always dodges politely rather than giving a warning, just like he is with the other handful of runners at this hour.
Talk to me about how one day the blond guy blows past Sam with a brisk “On your left” and Sam almost stumbles because, first of all, they don’t talk, that’s not a thing, and second of all, that motherfucker’s not even out of breath. Talk to me about how that kind of pisses Sam off in a way that the simple running didn’t, and suddenly he’s pushing himself a little more, a little harder and the guy comes past again with another “on your left” and they finish the run like that but this time, this time Sam’s been paying more attention and the guy has been doing something ridiculous like thirty miles an hour plus (it’s not like he actually clocked him, okay, he’s guessing here) and wow, that’s just inhuman, flat out impossible. Talk to me about how Sam goes back out to run the next day and it happens again and this time Sam’s paying even more attention and–son of a bitch that’s goddamn Captain America trolling him like a pro. Sam almost has a heart attack on the spot, he actually almost does, he stumbles and feels his heartrate hitch and everything, but he stays on his feet possibly through sheer ego because Captain fucking America might lap him a million times every morning, but he’s sure as shit not going to fall into the Reflecting Pool because of the shock, no sir, that’s just too humiliating to consider.
And the next day Random Blond Captain America comes and talks to Sam after their run and the fucker’s got jokes, too.
It literally doesn’t even surprise Sam when he agrees to go risk his neck to help the bastard. Fuck this civilian life bit, he’s got priorities.
(via thepainofthesass)
a minor: hey can you not sexualize minors… lol…. Its fucking creepy
an adult: WOW LMAO shut up kid you dont know anything im not sexualizing!! im waiting until theyre 18! Duh! Im a good person!
me: :) (thats me screaming with my mouth closed)
(via adelindschade)
Don’t cry
Talk shit get hit
best part is Correia said “hope you dont kill yourself” to Ronda leading up to the fight knowing that Ronda’s father committed suicide when she was a child.
Knocked out in 34 seconds.FUCK YEAH RONDA ROUSEY
Watch the fight. It’s incredible. Totally ruthless. And plus it’ll only take a little over 30 seconds….
(via adelindschade)
anus:
Gordon Ramsay doesn’t care about your gender, race, or creed. All he cares about is that you can cook.
The contestant, Christine, is blind, and he lets her know exactly what he thinks of her dish.
OMG I was preparing myself to be enraged by him making some horrible comment but now I’m crying in Starbucks GOD DAMMIT
Christ I am not okay with these fEELINGS
IM BAWLING
That’s so cute I wanna cry
Is there a Gordon Ramsay fan base on this site??? And where can i join???
Spoilers, she won. Her cookbook is on sale now.
Also, this is the very first apple pie she ever made.
Also, can we please take notice OF HOW HE DESCRIBES IT FOR HER? Ramsay was extremely conscious during the entire season that she would require different tactics than the other contestants; this was not the only time he became her eyes, nor the only time he did things like that scrape of the knife so she could actually have a sense of her work.
And if you really want to bawl like a baby? During final four or final three, I forget which, the remaining contestants got photos from home. Christine’s husband sent their wedding photo—which she had never seen. Ramsay paused before starting the challenge to describe to her not only her husband—the look of love and joy on his face—but also herself as a bride, so she could see in her mind how the two of them looked together on their wedding day.
It was extremely obvious nobody had ever thought to do that before.
This man should be a fucking icon not just for his cooking, but for how he treats those who are different. During the same season he asked a handsome young man, making conversation during auditions, if he had a girlfriend. The man responded that he was gay. Ramsay, without missing a beat: “I’m sorry. Have you got a boyfriend, then?” No drama, no “oh my GOSH! You’re GAY? TOKEN CHARACTER :DDDD” just a very quick, simple whoops-my-mistake and the corrected inquiry. And then he never brought it up again! It was just a thing he learned, getting to know a contestant.
Yes, he can be harsh on MasterChef and downright cruel on Hell’s Kitchen (although if you were a sous chef and you served me raw pork that was not pork tartare, I’d scream too). But he’s not an ogre; he’s a polite man with a gigantic heart who simply happens to take no shit from those who should know better.
I really love Gordon Ramsay and his willingness to learn from others
You see how nasty he gets on Kitchen Nightmares but he goes into another chef’a kitchen and lets them treat him like shit when they’re teaching him
He once tried to learn how to make hand pulled noodles from a Chinese chef and he didn’t patronize or condescend just treated him with total respect and let the man call him an idiot when he failed and took it all with a great sense of humor
I follow his twitter and he’s just so funny and nice and I LOVE HIM OK
Gordon Ramsay is king and I love him to death
#GORDONRAMSEYDEFENSESQUAD
(via dyinghistoric)
I DIDN’T LEARN ABOUT THIS IN DRIVING SCHOOL
Stop says the red light, go says the green
Wait says the yellow light, twinkling in between.
KNEEL, SAYS THE DEMON LIGHT
WITH ITS EYE OF COAL
SAURON KNOWS YOUR LICENSE PLATE
AND STARES INTO YOUR SOULTHIS IS ALWAYS FUNNY
I’ve only seen this legendary post in screenshots
(via dyinghistoric)
“I’m not sure we need half a billion dollars for women’s health care.”
-Jeb Bush, August 4, 2015That’s wrong. We need to be spending a lot more money on women’s health care. We need to be investing in organizations like Planned Parenthood that provide absolutely essential health services for women, particularly in low-income communities.
We must stand up for women’s health. Add your name to fight these Republican attacks on women’s health care.
Add Your Name Here
(via lupinatic)
One of my favorite scenes in all the books is the one where literally all the teachers ban together to just fucking slay Lockhart like “oh you were just telling me about the chamber of secrets” and “oh didn’t you say you wanted to take a crack at it”, it’s so great
No but you don’t understand the entire Hogwarts staff is either working together trying to reveal Lockhart as a fraud or freaking kill him and either way it’s great
(Source: , via lupinatic)
the president of nigeria is about to fuck boko haram up and cut his own salary in half and criminalized female genital mutilation
the president of guinea built/is building infrastructure and school and wells all over the country and is decreasing youth unemployment exponentially
the president of cote d’ivoire made school mandatory of children ages 6-16 and banned plastic bags while also building ultra modern trasportation infrastructure
the future is for real in africa
I think this should have a hell of a lot more notes on it than it does. This is what good news looks like folk, and the continent of Africa surely deserves a shed load of it.
(Source: noircommejesuis, via bonehandledknife)
Vodka Tia Moran