• Odysseus: One tent’s enough, I hope? I’ve heard that you prefer to share. Rooms and bedrolls both, they say.
  • Patroclus: That’s disgusting. And wrong. I don’t even get– why would– I’ve never had sex with anyone, anywhere. It’s none of your- you have- the nerve, the audacity, Achilles is my boss, technically. And he is terrible, face-wise. And how- how- do I know, frankly, that you’re not sleeping with him? Maybe you are. Maybe you’re trying to throw me off? Hmm check and mate.
  • Odysseus: chill