“really?” I say to inanimate objects that are not working like they usually do
“Stay.” I glare at inanimate objects that continuously fall over
“Fuck OFF!!!” I shout at the thing i have attempted and failed to pick up 4 times in a row.
“I am going to murder you and dance on your grave,” I tell the inanimate object that is actually functioning correctly but I cannot figure out how to use.
“Please stop punishing me. Is this because I was visiting the computer shop yesterday? I swear I am not cheating on you! I was just buying new cables!” I sob at the PC that has a minor glitch
“Pull this shit again, I dare you,” I snarl at my router as it boots me off the internet.