Don’t ever be in a relationship with someone who is perfectly fine with going hours/days without talking to you.
what? hours? what does this post mean? i think it’s healthy to have time apart and still be able to love each other without constantly having to talk or see eachother. you shouldn’t be that dependent on someone or rely on them to give you a sense of security and comfort whenever you need it because that’s not realistic
Says someone who is probably neurotypical and doesn’t have dependency issues lmao
“Dependency issues” isn’t an excuse to expect someone to talk to you 24/7 100% of the time. You can’t make your mental illnesses someone else’s cage. People need time and distance sometimes. Just cause you’re depressed or have anxiety or any other kind of mental illness that makes you codependent doesn’t mean that your partner has to sacrifice their own happiness and sanity for you. Codependency is toxic. Not being able to let your partner breathe is toxic. Being upset because your boyfriend didn’t reply to you for two hours is not okay. You can’t use your illnesses against other people, it isn’t fair.
I have a friend who’s ex would groom her into talking to him every day or else he’d act passive aggressive with her to make her feel like the guilty party until he started going off for months without telling her and then reappear as if nothing had happened.
She suffered great self esteem issues over this whole thing for almost five years so I dare you to give him the right over “dependency issues”.
Also? Some of us desperately need those few hours of solitude. There are times when I can’t stand to hear people speak, or when being touched makes me want to scream. My last relationship (insert eyeroll here) failed largely because my boyfriend made me feel guilty every time I hid in the basement of the library or said I was too busy to meet him. This isn’t me being callous about his dependency issues (of which there were many), this is me saying “Sometimes my brain tries to rip itself apart and I need people to leave before I lose control and make them leave.” So beyond the fact that it’s healthy to have a few hours apart every once in a while, have a care for those of us who sometimes really need that break.