In the same week, Chris Rock compared a beautiful love story about two women to girl-on-girl porn, and Pornhub released stats that show that “Lesbian” is the most searched porn term in 30 states. 

We can talk about how awful this is, how much they hate us. But instead I just want to give you all a reminder: 

Your existence is not a porn category. Your sexual desires don’t exist for men. Your love isn’t inherently exhibitionist or wrong, and neither is your sex life.  You are not here for them or their pleasure; you are here because you love and desire women. And no matter how many times some asshole jokes about you and your girlfriend’s kisses being ‘hot,’ no matter how many times how many time your lesbian-related google search leads you to a porn site, it doesn’t change the fact: there is nothing dirty about you, men have nothing to do with your intimacy, and they will never, ever understand.