Not. Even. Remotely.
I should warn people that I have absolutely no chill on this subject. Dumbledore haters piss me the fuck off, because for the most part they clumsily glue tumblr style social justice style discourse over the Harry Potter story and ignore what actually happened in the books. And they tend to be the same people who hate JKR and aren’t shy in expressing it. Dumbledore hate makes me feel sick.
The fact that Dumbledore loved Harry very, very deeply leaks out of every pore of the text. You have to be willfully blind to miss it. He was in a horrific position: set this boy on the path to destroy Voldemort or let Voldemort win. You need to make bloodless choices in a position like that. You need to keep a certain distance, or emotion will make you screw up. As it did when Dumbledore didn’t give Harry as much information as he needed during OotP, and as Dumbledore admitted. He was flawed, he struggled, but he was ultimately incredibly strong.
He had no choice but to leave Harry with the Dursleys, because Harry needed Lily’s blood protection (which saved Harry’s life in the end). Additionally, knowing that Harry was destined to die and that he was going to have to usher him along that path made him want to keep an emotional distance. Which you cannot blame him for. He couldn’t let himself get attached. Love, for Dumbledore, always ended in disaster. And yet, once he met Harry and watched him, he couldn’t help himself. It says this right in the text and there’s no reason to think Dumbledore was faking it.
People call him cold, uncaring, but he was never cold with Harry. He was always gently supportive, he praised him when he succeeded, he counselled him when he was grieving. He let Harry learn on his own and make his own choices, because it was vital to Harry’s eventual task. Harry knew that in the end.
On another literary and thematic level, Harry’s relationship with Dumbledore is meant to evoke humanity’s relationship with God. God is meant to be all knowing and all powerful, he’s meant to love us, and yet we’re all destined to die and go through the agony of losing people we love along the way. We’re meant to be good people, to make the right choices, when God is distant, seemingly absent, and allows horrible suffering in the world. How do we come to terms with that?
I am not a religious person, so I can substitue fate or biology or nature or whatever forces govern the universe for “God” and it still works. It still poses the same questions, the same challenges.
And I know I’ll get hate for saying this. Because the discourse imposes this innacurate stereotype of “abusive manipulator” over Dumbledore and people jump from that to “Omg you’re supporting abuse if you don’t hate him!”