but then there’s no cute lesbian-ness and that’s what makes it so gr8

honestly shut up

do these ppl realize that bi girls are actual people who aren’t getting into relationships for the sole purpose of performing good politics / cuteness / adequate proof of their same gender attraction / whatever else you’re judging them on 2day.. bi women’s relationships are Not For You, bi women shouldn’t have to wake up daily and think “how do I make my personal interactions with other people good and pure in the eyes of others.” 

one of the most damaging things about biphobia is that girls attracted to multiple genders end up constantly and guiltily analyzing their personal (and I’m gonna repeat, personal) relationships for ideological purity, whether or not they’re performing LGBT-ness hard enough, etc etc, and that’s not at all conducive to a healthy relationship. when u have bi girls spending more time thinking of whether or not their relationship is good enough for others than, idk, if their relationships are healthy and loving and fulfilling or not, that’s an issue.

lesbians / bi women who primarily or only date women are going to perceive w/w relationships as more relatable, cute, or refreshing to see. that’s a reality and a personal set of feelings/reactions. but why would you think it’s even remotely ok to take that and hurl it at bi women in the form of over-scrutinizing their (once again personal) relationships to the point where it’s dehumanizing, why would you think it would be ok to tell bi women things like “aw but now u don’t have the cuteness of a w/w relationship” which directly imply that you see bi women’s relationships as yours for consumption and judgement?? 

besides, saying u approve of bi women in w/w relationships more because “it’s cuter” is such a fetishy way of looking at w/w relationships and lesbian/bi women in general, I can’t tell if the commenter is a lesbian/bi woman or not but if not that makes it even creepier, especially the way they talked about “lesbian relationships” being cuter like.. that shit harms and fetishizes both lesbians and bi women, knock it off.

while we’re on the topic of “inappropriate ways people approach bi women about their relationships”: bi women partnered with men do receive some conditional benefits from that which women partnered with women do not, it is ok to talk about this. it is NOT ok to pick apart bi women’s personal relationships to the point where their personhood is impossible to see in it all. 

also, to address another common one, yes there are higher statistical likelihoods of bi women being hurt in certain ways in m/w relationships due to misogyny. it is ok to talk about this (especially when the discussion is led by bi women). it is absolutely NOT appropriate however to tell bi women how disappointing and a bad choice it is that they got into a personal relationship with a man (seriously guys, that rhetoric implies that it’s the bi woman’s fault if she’s hurt because “oh, well she went there, she chose 2 date a man” which is.. frankly a horrible way to respond to a woman being mistreated)

This post means a lot to me. It’s become difficult for me to not look at my relationships in a political way, I’ve been with people who made me feel like my personal life is political and it’s such an awful feeling.

BI COUPLES AREN’T FOR YOU!!!!