at this point there are only a select few pieces of discourse about ancient greece and rome that i will tolerate:

• did achilles bottom or was it patroclus (i stand by plato’s decision because achilles is definitely a power bottom)
  
• how many “slutty” women was mark antony more of a slut than (the answer: all of them)
• if alexander the great wrote iliad fanfic would it be self-insert or would it straight up be patrochilles shipping
• instead of discourse about whether or not sappho liked women, discourse about how many fragments we can possibly construe to be extremely gay (it’s a lot, if you’re creative)
• Which Roman Poet Was The Biggest Greek Poetry Fanboy
• the scholarly implications of the fact that the infamous fanfic my immortal bears a striking resemblance to homeric epic