• Aries: They tend to come off as 'masculine'. Assertive. Short tempered. Thinks they're everyone's boss.
  • Taurus: They are like still waters. Calm and steady. They don't really want to share their food with you, don't even try it.
  • Gemini: Quick witted. Natural storytellers. If they smile a lot, they probably hate you.
  • Cancer: Caring. Always worrying about you despite themselves. Probably should be on drugs.
  • Leo: Natural hosts. Treats everyone like they're best friends. Only do it because they know a king is nothing without their people.
  • Virgo: Analytical. Tend to be intellectually conceited. They'll offer to help you and then complain about it. If you do something about it, they'll complain even more.
  • Libra: Charm overload. Peacekeepers. Always on everyone's side. Gossip masters. Would self destruct rather than make a decision.
  • Scorpio: Quiet power. Hard to figure out. Fucks up shit for fun. They laugh at your distress and your inability to figure out they did it.
  • Sagittarius: The life of the party. Blunt honesty. Talks shit then forgets about it 0.5 seconds later. Not suitable for fragile egos. They have a fragile ego.
  • Capricorn: Stern. Probably your math teacher. Type of humor that you are always left wondering if you were the joke. Works harder than you could ever.
  • Aquarius: Weird and contradicting. Believes in conspiracy theories. Probably gets turned off if more than one person likes the same thing they do.
  • Pisces: Imaginative. Altruistic. Martyr complex. Spends 90% of the time daydreaming. Probably on drugs or at least look like it. Hobo chic. Probably crying right now.

Tags: i'm a picses and screaming with laughter at how fucking inaccurate mine is