Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

Listen, IDK if I’m on my own here but I’ve just started Wynonna Earp and Wynonna and Dolls need to touch faces (and maybe other things).

My reasons for this include:

• The sheer density of the snark in the first episode (and every episode come on y’all)

• The way Wynonna struggles with sentences when she sees him shirtless 

• The way Dolls defends Wynonna when someone talks shit about her being a lost cause

• The sparring match in Episode Six!!!!  My dudes!!!!

• Wynonna reaching out to check Dolls for a fever with her usual disregard for personal space

• Wynonna shouting and shaking and waving a gun around and generally being manically worried about Dolls when he gets taken

• The way they’re always just…a COUPLE inches too close for it to be normal

• Dolls being just tall enough to bow his head over Wynonna when they’re talking while she tips her head up to smirk and scowl as they stare at each other at a hand’s breath distance and slide sarcastic comments across the space like chess pieces

• HOW HAPPY WYNONNA IS WHEN HE TELLS HER ‘GOOD JOB’

• The way that they’re strongly reminiscent of Scully and Mulder in that they are at their most intensely erotic when doing something intensely businesslike and not at all appropriate for that level of connection

• The way that every once in a while they are perfectly in sync and totally aggravated about it

Anyway.

TL;DR: Xavier Dolls and Wynonna Earp need to kiss, or at the very least someone needs to direct me to literally any decent fic including that event

Anonymous asked: the borgias for the asks?

FOLKS THIS IS GONNA GET NSFW FAIR WARNING.

For this meme, which I love.

name ur politically correct ship that no one ever questions

…is there even such a thing in Borgias?  Um…I think not.  How about my ‘supported by canon’ ship, which is Cesare/Lucrezia.

now name ur trash ship

CESARE/MICHELETTO.  But like specifically in this really complicated power dynamic where Cesare’s emotions are all tangled up with his overwhelming need to prove that he’s in control of something, of anything, and God, Micheletto offers up his throat to the knife as sweetly and obediently as a lamb raised for the slaughter and Cesare loves that equally as much as anything else.  And Micheletto loves Cesare like a man worshiping his god, inextricable and helpless and sacrificial, a love that’s all about loyalty and penance and going to his knees and blood on the altar.

and ur really trashy im-going-to-hell ship

Cesare/Micheletto/Lucrezia, in which Cesare loves Lucrezia and Lucrezia loves Cesare and Micheletto loves Cesare so much (see above) and he would die for Lucrezia, at first because Cesare loves her and later because Micheletto is loyal to her himself (he does not want her the way they both want Cesare, and cannot love her the way he loves Cesare because there is only space in his heart for one love like that, but they find a common ground in Cesare and Micheletto would do a great many things to keep Lucrezia’s lily-white hands clean of blood), and Lucrezia’s children calls them both Uncle and Micheletto is bemused by this while Cesare is pained and it’s just all really complicated and awful and yeah, no one is really at ease but they’re happier than they could ever otherwise be.

This ship gets 100000% messier better when you add the fact that both Cesare and Lucrezia are married to the mix.  Because can you imagine the deals and maneuvering that have to be done in order to keep the balance copacetic.

who is your cinnamon roll fave who everyone loves

Oh, Paolo, my poor boy.  And also Djem.  All these people Juan “Fuck-ass” Borgia has killed.  Does Lucrezia count, or does she lose Cinnamon Roll status after she commits cold-blooded murder?

who is your sinnamon roll fave who everyone loves to hate/hates to love

…I don’t…I don’t even know.  There is no fandom to speak of, so I’m not sure who would fall into this category.  Giulia.  Rodrigo/Alexander VI.  

who is your trash fave who is so problematic they probably have hate tumblrs dedicated to them

EVERYONE.  ALL OF THEM.  ESPECIALLY MICHELETTO AND CESARE.  BUT TBH YOU DON’T WATCH THIS DUMPSTER FIRE OF A SHOW FOR THE CINNAMON ROLLS.

what is ur  guiltiest guilty fave fandom

This one?????

what is the fic you want to write/read but can’t because it is too full of Sin

Oh my buddy my dude it’s all here?  Like, there is no fic I can think of that’s more sinful than the show.

…oh wait, no, AU where Cesare and Lucrezia happen sooner and she sneaks into the confessional and sucks him off while he’s wearing his cardinal’s vestments, and the whole fic is heavily laden with imagery of Lucrezia as both Madonna and supplicant and also of Intercession and some complicated feelings about God, and Cesare being very VERY conflicted about his sister’s glorious golden hair spread across the blood red of his vestments.

There, I hope that was gratifying for everyone.

what is the most sinful fic you have ever read/written

I swear TO GOD that I am still writing that one porn fic with Micheletto and Cesare and scars as heraldry and the giving of orders and sexually tense removal of vestments.

what is the worst thing you want to become canon (character death, trash-ship etc)

Literally every single thing in this post, but tbh all my darkest desires are fulfilled within like the first two episodes when Micheletto takes a cat ‘o nine tails and hands it to Cesare and looks him dead in the eye as he says, “So whip me, my lord.”

what is your most sinful headcanon

Cesare has always had a powerful preference for blondes, the more golden their hair, the better.  He has a recurring dream about a beautiful woman sitting above him on a bed of gold cloth, her hair falling around them both as she kisses his lips and he fucks her.  His preference for fair-haired women is common knowledge.  The fact that it stems from a dream about his sister is not.  

Furthermore, I definitely agree with Wilde that Cesare has definitely had a dream about fucking his sister’s hair.  Cesare has a thing for his sister’s hair.

As for Cesare/Micheletto, c’mon now, we can all agree that they’ve fucked while he was wearing his vestments more than once.

what is your cutest headcanon

Um…when they were younger, Lucrezia taught Cesare how to braid her hair.  He still remembers, it’s A Thing.  I also recognize that this is not so much ‘cute’ in light of the previous answer.

what is your heart-breakingist head canon

THE END OF THE MOVIE SCRIPT????

Oh, and obviously the fact that none of the Borgias really believe in God (they observe the traditions, but even the Pope doesn’t really have faith) save for Cesare, who believes with all his heart in the prayers and sacraments he says every day, and believes with all his heart that he’s going to Hell, and sides with his father and his family anyway.  I find that very tragic.

what is ur crackiest crack ship

Cesare/Good Sense, tied with Lucrezia/Consistent And Prolonged Happiness

what is ur marginally less cracky crack ship

Cesare/Craftiness, which is tied with Micheletto/Religion, because you want to talk about people who definitely believe in God and definitely do terrible things anyway and basically just have a profoundly complicated relationship with religion and kind of approach murder as a religious connection not unlike that of a confessor to a supplicant, Micheletto’s your boy.  CAN YOU TELL THAT I HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS A L O T.

what is ur favourite ridiculous au

Um…this Temeraire AU from @wildehacked.  (Incidentally, in the Black Sails Temeraire AU, Miranda would be a dragon and Flint is her captain’s beloved and when her captain is cruelly ripped away from them both, she and Flint escape because Miranda can’t stand another captain and Flint just needs out and it’s all very terrible.  I digress.)

Also, I’m really a sucker for daemon AUs!  I have no idea what this one would look like except that Micheletto would have a hunting hound, the kind of rangy mixed-breed creature whose jaws can crack bone and whose loyalty stretches beyond the grave, and everyone believes that Rodrigo Borgia/Alexander VI has a white dove.  (The snake he keeps quite literally up his sleeve is a melanistic asp.  Cesare thinks this is funny, in a bitter sort of way.)

bracelet00:

cakecourse:

Can we normalize the idea that women can have deep voices? please??
Especially for trans women who feel gross or out of place for their deep voice.

Please, break the standard that all women have high pitched, perfect, feminine voices.

My car got towed on NYE, so after unsuccessfully trying every number programmed into my phone, I called my dad’s ass up at 2 AM to pick up myself and my friends to go get my vehicle out of impound (my dad is awesome. More on that later.)

Included in my group of friends was my friend Anna who had recently come forward as trans. She had very recently started presenting as a woman, and was pretty insecure in it, and had never met my father previously, so it wasn’t as though I had time to brief him on the situation. Anna was pretty shy during the whole ride, tucked in the back and letting her friends talk over her. She only spoke up after I had gotten my car back, thanking him for helping out.

The next day, I called to thank him for that night, and he asked me who was the girl with the deep voice. At first my heart sink in my guts, but without missing a beat, he started raving about how he LOVED her voice. He listed off a few actresses from his day who had had very deep voices, and how he adored it, and that kind of slow sultry speaking had been fading more and more as pop culture pushed for childish voices in women.

Your deep voice is gorgeous trans friends (and cis friends too.) it is warm and low and smooth like honey and perfect in every way. It is smoldering and evocative and absolutely beautiful.

(Source: lethargiclesbian, via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

skymurdock asked: Star Wars or Hamilton, 1 2 3.

STAR WARS IT IS

For this thing

1. Name your politically correct ship that no one ever questions.

I really genuinely like Han/Leia because I am a sucker for the “I just really enjoy shouting at this person and get really furious when they risk their life suRELY THIS DOES NOT MEAN FEELINGS” thing and I feel like that’s…all of Hoth.  The whole time.  All of it.  

Also, listen.  I will die on the hill of The Damerons as a totally adoring, poly unit of heroes in which Rey sleeps with her back to the wall and her head on Finn’s chest and her fingers tangled with Poe’s, who gently traces the line of the callous on her thumb in his sleep, and Finn lies there and stares at the ceiling and wonders how the FUCK he got this lucky.  (Because you deserve it, baby, you fucking deserve it.)

2. Now name your trash ship.

…I mean…Anakin is a trash can, so does Anakin/Padme qualify, or does Padme’s general quality everything lift them from the dumpster fire?

Although for real trash, you can’t do better than Rey/Phasma having really bitter angry hate sex.  Before Rey figures herself out and marries her two husbands, of course.

3. And your really trashy I’m-going-to-Hell ship.

…do I have one of these?  I don’t think I have–

oh no, yes I do, oh god I didn’t realize what the ship was for the fic but it was SO GOOD and I just.

Sith!Qui-Gon Jinn/Obi-Wan was not a ship I saw coming but F U C K.

It’s a really good fic okay, it sold me hardcore.  It’s this series by @poplitealqueen.  I should reread it because it’s been updated.  I’ll go sit in a hole now.

(I just really like Sith Qui-Gon and also Darth Venge, who I don’t think shows up in this one but is a big player in Re-Entry, which is like. Yeah.)

walburgablack:

charamei:

hogwartsaheadcanon:

harrypotterconfessions:

acesirius:

everybody always makes the marauders out to be super cool and suave but dude

they had codenames

they named their own friendship group

as far as i can tell only aBSOLUTE DORKLORDS DO THAT

how much do you wanna bet the entirety of hogwarts refused to call them ‘the marauders’ and they got all grumpy abt it

The entire exchange between them all during their 5th year exam also attests to this.
1. He’s sitting in my chair 2. He’s wearing my clothes 3. His names remus Lupin??
That’s not even funny ! but they all laughed. And they’ve known he’s a werewolf for how many years at that point? 3? I can’t get over it lolol it is absolutely dorky.

Sirius and James wore matching Phoenix shirts while riding the motorbike together.

Elvendorks.

In addition (and I will categorically never get over this) sixteen year old James Potter doodling Lily’s initials in a love heart on his DADA OWL exam? 

And for god’s sake, they dedicated a significant chunk of their free time to drawing their entire school (and not just any school- Hogwarts, the most convoluted building anywhere ever) and enchanting it to keep track of every single person, not to mention the fucking stairs and the walls that move. This map can see people under the Invisibility Cloak, doesn’t give two shits about Polyjuice Potion. 

They were gi-fucking-gantic dorks. You can bet that their dorm room had more advanced textbooks in it than any other in the castle. You can bet that their homework (despite often likely being done a little close to the line) will nine times out of ten be twice as many inches as they were asked for including moving, colour coded diagrams and insanely complex theory on how to improve the effects of said spell or potion, potential applications that literally no-one would have thought of.

Like the very fact that they’re canonically fucking mischief makers of the calibre of Fred and George, the fact that they caused trouble that way is just textbook behaviour for a lot of really really bright kids? They were goddamn geniuses, and they were bloody bored 90% of the time, so they pushed themselves. Acing transfiguration? No problem, let’s become Animagi to help our best mate. Ancient Runes way bellow our skill level? Fine, we’ll use a combination of that, arithmancy and charms to make a map that tracks people all over the castle.

They were absolute nerd kings, and I sodding well love it.

I’ve always felt that a lot of fandom doesn’t fully appreciate the scale of the work they had to do to become Animagi by fifth year.

Like, they supposedly found out about Remus some time during their second year, right? And it’s meant to take years of study to become an Animagus.

But it’s more than just that. Before they could even begin the Animagus part of the process, they had to attain a NEWT-level of understanding of Transfiguration.

They didn’t just do the Animagus stuff, oh no. These little nerdlords steamed through their entire Transfiguration curriculum for the next 6 and a half years of schooling, and then did something that was meant to take ‘years of study’ on top of that.

All in about three and a half years.

Utter genius nerds.

thank you. so so tired of seeing Snape v/s the Marauders posited as nerd v/s jock, and/or Sirius written as not!smart

(via fandom-adoration)