why does no one ever talk about how lewis and clark met why isn’t that taught in history classes it’s like some rom-com meet-funny trope and i’ve literally never heard it brought up. literally the start of one of the most famous friendships in america and no one talks about it.
Wasn’t Clark just Lewis’ commanding officer? I guess I don’t know this story either. Can you tell it?
yes!! oh my god!!
so at twenty-one years of age, stupid stubborn hotheaded ensign meriwether lewis decides to get hella drunk and crash the party of one of his superior officers, starting an argument over politics (namely, defending thomas jefferson, his neighbor and veritable father figure) and insulting his host and basically being an embarrassment. so, he’s arrested and leveled with a court martial!! because this ridiculous boy can’t mind his fucking manners when he’s tipsy apparently!!
but instead of having to explain to his poor mother why he got booted out of the continental army, he’s acquitted (”with honor” bc apparently i’m not the only one who plays favorites when it comes to meriwether lewis), but he has to be reassigned so he doesn’t piss off his commanding officer again (awk). and whose brand new sharp-shooting rifle unit does he get transferred to?? take a wild guess!!!! that’s right, william clark’s!!!! and over the next six months meri falls deepfuck in totally platonic bro-love with him until clark resigns his commission for family reasons. then, roughly eight years later, lewis writes him to ask if maybe he’d like to travel to the ends of the earth by his side and, well, the rest is history.
But how do you know it was platonic
i hope you guys understand that when i say “platonic” i say it in the patronizing sarcastic tone of voice i always use when i talk about meriwether lewis’s big ol’ crush on his bff. maybe i can’t prove totally that he was v gay and probably at least a little bit madly in love with clark, but damn i wanna believe love exists ok.
lewis’s obvious sexual repulsion of women, his inability to find a wife, his desire to live with clark after the expedition, that last letter he wrote to clark before his violent death that we don’t have because clark burned it – we can read a lot into all of this if we want to, but even besides all of that the point remains that meriwether lewis was intensely fond of clark, and that they cared deeply for one another, and that their personalities complemented and completed one another in a way that makes you think twice about soulmates.
sooooo, was sacagawea, covering for their relationship?, I need to know history!!. (via @adaywithoutlightis-night )actually, sacagawea was a sixteen-year-old kidnapped shoshone girl sold into sexual slavery to a french trader named toussaint charbonneau, who pissed power couple lewis and clark off to no end due to generally just being who he was as a person.
whereas lewis had no real interest in women from what we can tell from his writings, he actually wrote about how much he admired sacagawea’s extreme fortitude and numerous skills that helped them throughout their journey. lewis also actually delivered sacagawea’s child!! she had a very difficult birth (probably because she was a child), which sent lewis into multiple kinds of panic. clark, however, really doted on sacagawea and her son; he gave them both nicknames, looked out for their safety during the trip, and was very close to them even after the expedition and ended up adopting sacagawea’s son. he was also a notoriously bad speller and i don’t think he ever spelt charbonneau’s name correctly ever not even once (which makes me think of the blenderdick cucumberpatch meme tbh).
It can go all the way down to the county level, which is kinda crazy.
31,493 people have my surname.
And I will fight them all*
so im not at all surprised that Yi is the 118th most common last name and there are more than 4 million people that share it…. tbh its really nice and i feel very connected right now
166,859, there are a lot of us.
1,236 of us worldwide. Small family.
153 people. Which is probably why no one can pronounce it.
Nearly 7,000 people in the world have my last name, the largest portion of them in Germany, which is not any kind of surprise whatsoever.
50 people with my married surname, and I bet they’re close enough relations that we could fairly easily get in touch with them all.
lmao I beat you all: 305, 217 share my surname
But there shall only be one victor. ME!
99 people and I’m probably related to most of them.
2,762 people share mine 😀
77,921 lol. Just a few of us then…
9,851. There’s actually a website out there dedicated to the family that shares my surname which is hilarious.
2310…not the most common in the world lol
152766, not surprising it occures the most in the US, there is a town in Pensylvania named after my (distant) family. And a boyscout camp in New Hampsire I think.
2,358,308
…now riddle me this, how is it that people still misspell a five-letter last name that’s THAT common?
(Source: kingjaffejoffer, via windbladess)
“Which author would you want to bring into 2015″ is such a hard question to answer I mean you could watch Arthur Conan Doyle despair over everything Sherlock Holmes within the last century or you could present Douglas Adams with an iPad
I would quite like to unleash Dickens on the Tories.
imagine William Shakespeare in the age of social media. 24/7 supreme dick jokes and the world celebrates.
Victor Hugo vs Twitter’s 140 character limit
Okay but Oscar Wilde on Instagram
Give Asimov an actual real robot
Show Lovecraft a mixed-race president and watch him shit himself in fear and anger
Introduce Mark Twain to Stephen Colbert, preferably in front of a live audience
All of these. And bring Dumas to meet Obama.
Lord Byron and facebook.
Show Tolkien the movies they made of his books
(via ailleee)
Everything you need to know about my friendship with @twistedangelsays (tagged here as my dear Adler) according to Farmer Refuted:
Half the time she’s Burr: “Let him be….Alexander, please.”
The other half she’s Mulligan: “Oh my God, tear this dude apart!”
In this argument, obviously, I’m Hamilton.
Friendly reminder that Martha Washington outlived two husbands and four children and still maintained that one of the worst days of her life was the day Thomas Jefferson came to call.
(Source: chaos-yet-harmony, via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
Question for the Void
So I’ve seen a lot of very articulate shouting about lack of LGBT+ presence in media lately (there’s a show with a ship called Clexa and…that’s not a show I watch but I feel for the fans) and I have a question. I’ve been toying with the idea of a novel that’s basically “In which a bisexual technopath and her walking taser girlfriend go out and take down a corrupt government together” and I was curious if that was something people would be interested in?
*has never been in a fight in my life* listen. i will beat ur ass
Me: *has never lost a fight in my life* Listen, I will beat your ass.
Them: *sees that I am five-nothing, curvy, and female*
Them: Yeah, right.
Them: *continues touching me*
Them: *freaks out when I almost break their wrist*
Me: Listen, I told you I would beat your ass.
(via a-idontevenknow-thing)
