Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

severus-snape-is-a-butt-trumpet:

is there a word for “i was instantly good at a lot of things as a quote-unquote gifted child, and, as a result, i was able to skate by without ever being taught how to actually learn a new skill, and now that i’m an adult trying to learn new things that i can’t be good at instantaneously, i don’t have the patience or knowledge to improve on them, because skills that don’t come naturally to me just make me angry because i lived off instant gratification my whole childhood due to not ever being challenged intellectually or taught basic learning skills?” asking for a friend

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

justangrymacaroni asked: i'm imagining the significance of the dwarves inventing a printing press. like you said, their years spent traveling without a home probably did a lot of trauma, which trickled down through the generations. to be able to tell their own stories and to see them permanently pressed with something stronger than a hand and pen, is probably really special. catch me crying in the fuckin' club thinking about this, goddam fucking line of thrain and children of Mahal.

Honestly I need a shirt that reads “Catch me crying in the fucking club about the children of Mahal” because HARD SAME.  THE STORY OF MY LIFE.

Fun History Fact:

caniplaywithyourorgans:

lizzywhimsy:

If you just got excited, you’re a nerd. 

@words-writ-in-starlight ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Things I have said while playing Dragon Age: Inquisition so far, as recorded by my flatmate

the-queen-of-thedas:

thefastestclockintheuniverse:

thefastestclockintheuniverse:

thefastestclockintheuniverse:

- You can’t stop me, I can jump wherever I want

- Well that was rude

- Hey boys

- Oh shit, fuck

- Fucking shades I hate you

- Please someone stop me from burning to death that would be marvellous

- Oh fuck goddamn

- Why are there so many damn shades I really fucking hate shades

- What are we doing kids?? Are we all dying like i am??

- If I die then we’ll know we did the wrong thing

- Why are you Welsh?? You’re a bloody elf that doesn’t make any sense!

- Shut the fuck up you sexy dwarf

- Fucking Welsh elves, telling me what to do

- (Manic laughter, strawberry lace dangling out of mouth)

- Sorry I made you jump off a tower

- Yes let’s kill them all (giggles) dead. Death death death.

More things I have said while playing DA:I: Fallow Mire Edition

- Bastarding marsh zombies (sings) I’ll kill you all with fire, and then who will be laughing, IT WILL BE ME 

- Oh great a walking bastard

- (Sings) I don’t want to do this at all, there are so many, this sucks ass 

- Ok we’re gonna try a new tactic boys, we’re gonna run like the blazes 

- Well done boys, we got through that by running blindly 

- Eugh there are so many zombies and I can’t be bothered to fight them all (sings) even though she would win, let’s face it, she is the best 

- OH SHIT I FELL IN THE MARSH 

- (Sings) let’s just run, zombies can’t run, their legs are dead (pause) OH SHIT WAIT THEY CAN 

- Got him, now he’s double dead 

- Oh good, here come the zombies, (sings) DO DO DO DOOOOO 

- I’m going to be honest with you bubs, I need to play AT LEAST 7 more hours of dragon age today 

- Oh good, a RAGE demon (sings) just to shake things up a little bit 

- (Sings) everyone come down and help me please, cause I am fucking dying

- OH MY GOD LET ME BURN THEM

- Why are you guys fighting from here, when I’m down in a fucking pit?! …fucking morons 

- Why the PISS am I on fire?!

Final update because this has got out of hand but I also can’t shut my mouth while playing

ahh solus you fool, i can play you like a fiddle

(chants) cut scene cut scene CUT SCENE CUT SCENE

fuck you solus i didn’t invite you

I WANT TO FIGHT THE DEMONS (…) wait do I?

(sings) In the mountain, the scary mountain, the dwarves are getting dressed… what are they wearing, they look so cool, and i want to look my best

Look at his stupid hat! …i love him

why yes i WILL loot your body

LETS. GO. THERE’S A FUCKING DRAGON LADS.

This is the best thing I have ever read

(via lathori)

stunt-muppet:

derinthemadscientist:

librarian-amy:

scanlan:

susiephone:

wearevengeancenow:

nerdgasrnz:

inspectorwired:

movie tropes that will never get old to me:

• a thing happens + two people exchanging money in the back
• fourth wall breaking
• “give up all your weapons” and that one guy that spends the entire evening taking his weights worth out his pockets
• *a terribly loud crash* meowing/ car sirens heard offscreen
• alternatively: a terribly loud crash and one of the characters going “oops” in the most casual voice
  
• “fuck you” “well if you insist”
  

#alternatively alternatively: *terribly loud crash w/ sirens and cat screeching*#person: *off camera* ‘I’M OKAY’ (via @zenlida)

character being all “you expect me to do X?” Gilligan Cut to character doing X

• the squad gets captured and interrogated separately, and they’re all telling equally terrible, completely contradictory lies
  
• people completely missing the completely unsubtle, very visible dangerous thing in the room with them
• alternatively, people absolutely seeing the completely unsubtle, very visible dangerous thing in the room with them and just not giving a shit
• bonus points if it’s a beleaguered minimum wage employee who just goes about their business like “yep same shit as always”
• someone pretending they don’t know another character is eavesdropping, only to casually reveal at the end of the scene that they know (*leaving* “tell tom that he can come out now” *tom drops from the ceiling in spy gear, irritated*)
• choosing to deal with the villain by just leaving them alone in a room with another character
• the “hands go down” trope
  
• example: “any questions?” *everyone’s hands go up* “…that AREN’T sarcastic?” *everyone’s hands go down*

how could all y'all forget “ACT NATURAL!”

These are all great but let’s not forget two characters giving extremely biased flashbacks to the same event that each paint the other as an incompetent loon

i would like to respectfully add: scenes where a character walks into a room, sees something scary, and turns around and walks out with no reaction or change of expression

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

straightpeoplereceipts:

if you’re the more dominant person in your relationship but you’re also shorter you’re a crop top

(via lakidaa)

andhumanslovedstories:

andhumanslovedstories:

If the frosting! Of your cupcake! Is equal to or greater in height than the cupcake itself! you made a bad fucking cupcake

We can’t as a society keep supporting pastries that are just edible plates for five inch piles of sugar glue

I will put an entire can of frosting on my cupcake as I face God and walk backward into Hell.

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

thebootydiaries:

someone: hey i genuinely care about u and i like u a lot 

my brain: ?? ? time for Joke?? make Joke??? yes??

(via littlestartopaz)