Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

“I’m a font of wisdom!”

–My mom when she’s had enough gin to be drunk (read: one shot in a mug of cranberry juice)

Commentary from the font includes:

• Capital-O Opinions on sex toy stores and the concept of the vibrating dildo
• Giddy comments on and absent-minded poking of my dimples
• Insistence that my high alcohol tolerance has something to do with my immune system
• Thrilled fascination with my hair
• Upon reading this post, the comment “I know stuff!  I’m smart!”

littlestartopaz:

coaldustcanary:

cassandrashipsit:

dragonflies-and-katydids:

thecuckoohaslanded:

lovepsychothefirst:

kaseysellingseashells:

queerwashing:

if you give me a task with no deadline i will literally never do it but if you give me a deadline i will get it done exactly 1 hour before the deadline even if the deadline is in six years

#this is ADHD#or possibly another executive function disorder but ADHD is the only one I really know about#the reason for this is an ADHD brain does not have an internal feedback system#ADHD brains require external input to make up for missing executive functions#like the ability to process multi-step tasks with delayed consequences#because to an ADHD brain#things don’t exist in the absence of consequences#meaning#people with ADHD are drawn to things like video games because the feedback is external and immediate#every action you take has an immediate effect on the game environment#and you can SEE that your actions are providing xp or moving a task towards completion#but for something like homework#the consequences of that homework being done do not exist until that homework must be turned in#and it’s either done or not done at that point#which is why people with ADHD function best closest to deadlines#the consequences of that work being done must be IMMEDIATE to compel the brain to see it as a task that requires completion#because the further out a task is from the consequences of it being done#the more an ADHD brain is incapable of acknowledging it#TASKS DO NOT EXIST TO YOU UNLESS THERE IS IMMEDIATE EXTERNAL FEEDBACK#THIS IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST PROBLEMS WITH ADHD BECAUSE TO OTHER PEOPLE IT DOES LOOK LIKE LAZINESS#BUT A LAZY PERSON JUST WOULDN’T DO THE TASK AT ALL#AND ADHD PERSON STRESSES THEMSELVES HALF TO DEATH TO GET THINGS DONE#BUT ISN’T CAPABLE OF STARTING THEM EARLIER TO PREVENT THE STRESS#BECAUSE THE TASK DOES NOT EXIST UNTIL IT NEEDS TO BE EITHER DONE OR NOT DONE#IT’S KIND OF LIKE SCHRODINGER’S BOX#THE TASK DOESN’T HAVE TO BE DONE OR NOT DONE UNTIL THERE ARE CONSEQUENCES FOR ITS STATE OF COMPLETION#so what LOOKS like laziness to other people#is actually a VERY SERIOUS FAILURE of the brain’s executive function system#which is a VERY serious medical problem#the name ‘Attention Deficit Disorder’ really fails to sell how serious the disorder actually is via @thecuckoohaslanded

god dammit my tags got cut off AGAIN I’m hitting the tag limit on like every post lately, I really need to work on that

Anyway I went on to say that there are 5 major executive functions of the human brain.  These are the ‘higher functions’ that really distinguish between a human brain and that of any other animal.  We have added intelligence on top of that, but these are the functional abilities our brains have that the rest of the animal kingdom does not have on a a structural level.  There are 5 of them.  ADHD affects all 5.  And none of them are actually ‘attention’ (the closest function to anything that can reasonably be called ‘attention’ is what’s called Working Memory, which is your brain’s ability to hold a specific task in mind to come back to it; distractions are inevitable, but a healthy brain will hear a phone ring, look up, and remember to go back to what it was doing before.  An ADHD brain will hear the phone riBANG ALL MEMORY OF THE CURRENT TASK IS GONE.  ADHD brain looks up, sees the name on the caller id, oh it’s an unknown number, oh it’s probably some political pollster, oh man this year’s election is just awful I can’t believe people are supporting that angry cheeto. Oh cheetos I’m hungry I should go make a snack.  What kind of snacks do we have?  Did I remember to buy cereal at the store the other day?  What about dog food?  Oh my god I forgot to let the dog back in the house this is why I should have gotten a cat.  Oh my friend sent me a great cat video earlier I should watch that.  AND GUESS WHAT YOU NEVER GO BACK TO WHAT YOU WERE DOING BECAUSE THE STRUCTURE IN YOUR BRAIN THAT SUPPORTS RETURNING TO A PARTIALLY COMPETED TASK DOES NOT EXIST THE WAY IT DOES FOR A NORMAL HEALTHY BRAIN.  This is why even if you start a task well before a deadline you can’t keep to it until it’s been completed; the consequences of it being done MUST be more compelling than everything else in the immediate environment for the brain to see it.  No matter how much time you give yourself to complete the task, if you have ADHD it will take you 100% of that time, every time, which is why having ADHD actually TEACHES YOU to put things off, because it’s the only way to shorten the total time actually spent completing the task – the disorder rewards you for self-destructive behavior because it’s the only way you can get things done at all, and you end up living in a permanent state of extreme stress, hopping from one emergency deadline to the next even though you hate yourself for it every single time).  The disorder has been horribly named in a way that trivializes just how serious and life-ruining it actually is.

ADHD is a very, very serious disorder and the pop psych/common understanding of it makes it seem HORRIBLY trivial compared to the real damage it actually does to people’s lives.

…

…

…ohhh…

This is both fascinating and… possibly slightly alarming.

@birbhubby this is really interesting reading.

So, if you’re at all curious about what living in my brain is like, even while medicated and largely functional, this is a pretty good description.

I love and am freakishly good at certain deeply boring repetitive tasks becuase they’re the only way I can get my brain to rest for even a minute.

@words-writ-in-starlight !!!! This! Explains Explains! So! Much!

WHAT. MY WHOLE LIFE MAKES SENSE NOW.

(via littlestartopaz)

twistedangelsays:

tatooed-324b21:

kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd:

cryztalgemz:

ladugard:

I want gay cafés

Like gay bars except no drunk people or loud music, instead there’s coffee and cinnamon buns and pleasant conversations

see? this is what we need

a non-alcoholic, non-sexual space for LGBT groups that is inclusive to younger people

im here, im queer, and i can’t drink beer

Kinda weird that this doesnt exist actually

@im-lost-but-not-gone remember how you wanted to open a coffee shop?

WOW YES.

(via lathori)

friendlyneighborhoodpegacorn:

dynastylnoire:

blxckd-amative:

threehourstonevada:

erdsthenerds:

bastillearda:

gutsygumshoe:

cephalopodvictorious:

gunsounds:

its “thighs rubbing together under ya sundress” season

Buy cute, cheap lace leggings. Cut them a little above your knee. Hem them or don’t, but then you can wear them under your sundresses and not worry about how you sit or if your thighs chafe, and if anyone sees them they look cute af so hell yes

Or a little deodorant between the thighs is magical

Also, LUSH sells this dust called Silky Underwear that makes your skin smooth so they don’t stick together or chafe.

I love that we’re all here for each other in this season of need

Monistat has an anti-chafing gel that works wonders and I live by. You can usually find it in the feminine care aisle of any drugstore. 

There’s this stuff called Glide…pretty cheap & works hella miracles

I’m so ready for sundress season. 

reblog to save a thigh

(via muteelfmoonmoon)

Some things must be broken  others must crack but I will always have your back.

im-lost-but-not-gone:

So my blood kin family is messed up. In a way, I’ve often wondered “if only my family were addicted to something, I could blame the substance for the way they treat the people they’re related to, but no, this is just how they act. All the time. To people they’ve allegedly pledged affection and allegience to.”  So, fucked up family, but I have learned over the years that there are lots of us who come from fucked up families, like we have jackets and could actually form our own country of survivors of fucked up families.  Anyway, the way my blood kin deals with family members who buck the system is they metaphorically set them on fire and toss them overboard into the icy cold wilderness to let them sort themselves out alone.  I was the first that said “fuck this” and flip over their own board game of “just how much can I make you twitch.”  Yeah, I spent many years with the smell of my charred life lingering in my nostrils and making my eyes itch. But then, over the following years, there were other members of the family who were similarly burned and, because I would not go quietly into that dark smoky night, I became known as the “Burn Ward.”  I’m proud of that. One of my beloved members of our Burn Ward was charred crisp, fiercely, and nearly gave up any reason to live when they came out. I love them and feel so fiercely proud of them and the one sibling - their parent - who stood by them and held them close, even when the flames consumed them both.  Four years later, they both live their lives, speak honest words, and can share in love that they had been too broken to express.  I am so proud of them.  So fucking proud of them. And I want to shout into the darkness “You shall not overcome us!”

THIS IS MY MOM GUYS.

SHE’S THE BEST GUYS.

LOVE HER.

ALSO SHE GIVES GREAT ADVICE FOR DEALING WITH TERRIBLE PEOPLE.  SO HIT HER UP.

hacash asked: for the valentines' day prompts may I ask for legolas/gimli and the different courtship rituals of elves and dwarves?

notbecauseofvictories:

the courtship of gimli son of gloin and legolas greenleaf, son of thranduil is a disaster from beginning to end. Because elves really only have two romantic settings:

1. “no romantic feelings whatsoever” 
2. “undying love that withstands the ravages of time and yokes two hearts together such that neither death nor fire nor void could cleave them in twain unto the coming of Dagor Dagorath, Amen”
   

which means that when legolas figures out that this strange bright-hard lightness and gladness and warmth he feels around gimli is love, that’s it, game over, his expectation is that they will either be married and live forever in joyous bliss or gimli will refuse him, and legolas will spend all his days wandering in middle earth, singing ballads he himself has composed about the prowess and kindness of gimli, son of gloin.

(elves…..don’t really court one another. Either your love is returned, or it’s not. “Not” is a perfectly acceptable answer, there is lots of room in elvish culture for unrequited love—it’s very courtly, their idea of “not”. It comes with an expectation you turn that pain into something Ennobling and Grand, and remain true to the ideal of your beloved. But that’s it, the matter is settled, and it takes monumental shifts to make either party reconsider.)

unfortunately, this means that after their shaky declarations of mutual feeling (to call it a hatchet job, gimli insists, would be an insult to perfectly decent hatchets) legolas takes it as a personal affront that gimli wants to court. To him, it seems unimaginably cruel, to spend time with a person in that way while always keeping one eye on the door, as though to say, you are perfectly nice, but only for now.

not all of us have forever to promise, amralime, gimli says, very gently.

(really, gimli’s argument is—look at how much grief has been brought into the world by elves who loved, but did not know what came after. Who did not know how to compromise, when to let a disagreement go; who struggled against their beloved’s seeming lack of affection, to give gifts that were not Portentous and Doomed. 

maybe the immortal Firstborn can afford to spend their lives desperately unhappy in a match made with love and little consideration. But dwarves do not have the luxury. All metal is tested by fire, to burn away impurities; it is not a condemnation of the ore.)

finally, finally, gimli manages to talk him around by assuring him that their courtship will mostly involve wandering in the woods of ithilien and making out against trees. “gonna smith you…so much jewelry” gimli mumbles sleepily, as their argument winds down, fading into the night. (It hasn’t been an argument in earnest for a few hours now, especially once they crawled into bed together.)

legolas smiles a little, and sleeps.

#legolas is literally so offended     #“YOU THINK YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN ME???” in equal parts indignation and hurt     #he literally does not tell thranduil they’re dating because a) dwarf     #and b) “you couldn’t even get A DWARF to marry you on the first go-around he had to think about it first? what son of mine—”     #ah good times     (x)

jcatgrl:

taejira:

Forget the Myers-Briggs fucking personality assessment. I am dead tired of hearing if someone is an INFP or an ESLQ or whatever. I want to know if someone is melancholic or choleric. Bring back the four humors. I wanna see “Kaley, 16, phlegmatic” when I go to someone’s blog. Who is with me. Lets make this happen

here’s a test i found. go wild, y'all. (im choleric.)

(Source: pipistrellus, via dyinghistoric)

heathicorn:

apparently some guy named mark was trying to tell my mom he needed to speak with my dad about any financial transactions my mom was making because he was the man of the house and she did not take kindly to his implying that my dad was the primary breadwinner/person in charge in our family so

(via yea-lets-do-this-shit)