if you’re looking for a character with a redemption arc why would you ever ever ever even consider severus snape when you have regulus black right there
Seriously, it kills me when I see people hold scientists up as pinnacles of logic and reason.
Because one time the professor I was interning for got punched in the face by another professor, because mine got the funding, and told the other professor his theory was stupid.
This same professor told me to throw rocks to scare the “stupid fucking crabs” into moving so we could count them properly.
SCIENCE
thank you
this is one of the best comments this post has recieved
I have witnessed:
Two professors hiding around a corner and snickering, “Shhh, here she comes!” While a female professor approached and, when she finally found them, she proceeded to scream while pointing from one to the other, “You! I called your office but you weren’t there! So I tried to call YOUR office to figure out where HE was but YOU weren’t there!”
Two grad students standing outside a closed and locked door yelling, “Come out of the damn office. You haven’t left for days. If you didn’t have a couch in there I’d be concerned as to where you were sleeping!”
A religious studies professor apologizing for being late to class because, “security stopped me because I’m dressed like a hobbit”
Watched a professor snort the results of my experiment to determine if I had the right final compound.
Two archeology professors toss priceless fossilized teeth back and forth in an attempt to figure out who is smarter by “guessing the type of tooth and species of animal before it lands”
Multiple fully degreed individuals throw dry ice at one another in an attempt to be first to use the lab/get that piece of equipment/or change the iPod song.
A genetics professor build furniture out of stacks of paper and planks of wood because she is that far behind in grading papers/responding. One of the impromptu furniture pieces housed a fish tank.
I could go on but I think that covers the larger portion of the insanity…
Every time it comes around on my dash, it gets better.
- I have had a professor buy a huge fuckoff bottle of rum during fieldwork in Costa Rica and let the undergrads get wasted because “you’re not underage in Costa Rica and we’ll be up all night with the bats anyway!”
- Same professor hung a bat from her headlamp and wore it as a decoration for an entire night.
- A whole swarm of older women - and these are women with PhDs and world-renown bat experts, the bigwigs - all, to a woman, go to the formal charity dinner at an international research symposium in Toronto in late October dressed in skimpy Batgirl costumes. Because Halloween was that weekend, you see.
- At a different conference, a professor get blackout drunk and pass out on the side of the road.
- “Yeah, we have to say we did it properly for the grant but to be really honest, Miracle-gro works better.”
- Teaching lab: we had liquid nitrogen for a demo, and after class the professor, the other TA, and I spent a good two hours freezing and breaking things in it.
a chemistry class begins with 30 students nine months later just six of us left sitting on tables dipping paper into contaminated chemicals to see what happens when we burn it teacher making idle suggestions while he marks our work
“go to the fume hood thing, yeah now put some potassium in chlorine” can i burn the results sir? “fuck it sure whatever its tainted anyway”
The prof I’m working for just asked me if I knew how to pick a lock, and when I responded “yes” she replied, “see, this is why I hire the former delinquents instead of the suck-ups. You’re actually useful.”
I then let her into her office.
“Security stopped me because I’m dressed like a hobbit.” I would bet anything this has happened to Dr. Medievalist.
Semi-related non-academic anecdote: The concert hall security guys tried to throw out our violone player in between performances this spring because they thought he was a homeless guy. Despite the fact that he was wearing concert black… and carrying a violone. There is no more obvious instrument.
One of my English Professors admitted that sometimes “you just have to do a soliloquy” and would phone up the main office of the department on the internal phoneline to recite a Shakespearean monologue at them. No greeting, no warning, just “To be or not to be”.
every time i read this stuff i think about how upset vulcans would be to meet earth’s greatest scientific minds
next up, in food trends that are apparently not satire: why not eat a fucking gelatin jellyfish? it’s new! it’s translucent! it looks like an unused breast implant or something you’d find stranded above the tideline! it has almost zero calories because it contains nothing in the way of flavour or nutritional value, and we think that’s just nifty.
this is some dadaist aspic minimalism bullshit, I swear to allsuffering christ. why not eat some clingwrap while you’re at it? or - let’s go crazy - a slice of fucking cheesecake? ARE THE SHADES OF PEMBERLEY TO BE THUS POLLUTED? DID WE SUFFER AND DIE IN VAIN?
I was gonna say, that’s….that’s not a cake. That’s unflavored jello. Literally vegan gelatin and agar are both gelatin substitutes, their only purpose is to flavorlessly cause liquid to become less liquid. So unless the mineral water is flavored, that is plain jello topped with what amounts to caramelized sugar. (I’m not going to even dignify “roasted soybean flour” with a response.) This is what will appear in the new Lileks Gallery of Regrettable Food in fifty years.
I mean, it’s perfectly edible and all and if you want to eat it you go ahead and bon appetite, but this is not cronut-level territory. I could make that for you in my own kitchen in about 30 minutes and mine would be shaped like a skull because I have more imaginative jello molds. (Technically I could also make you a cronut, but that involves way more time and energy.)
Given the restaurant claims to be serving them “this weekend” this may be an April Fool despite being posted twelve hours too early and on a reputable news site. Friendly reminder tomorrow is “bully someone into feeling gullible day”….
That moment when I think, “Okay, but I’m still willing to make this for science because it’s stunt food that doesn’t have anything in it that can make me sick.”
Oh man, at least use fruit juice instead of mineral water, though. Like I know you aren’t allergic to tasting things :D
I mean if you (the universal you) have dietary restrictions/allergies that prevent eating animal gelatin, agar and other vegan gelatin substitutes are great. No argument here. I get why they’re using that. It’s not the agar I have objections to. And I suspect with the original dish, they’re playing with texture, I just think they’re doing so rather unnecessarily.
There’s no reason you should have to suffer a flavorless blob of goo dunked in sugar under the guise of “dessert that won’t kill me”. It’d probably be healthier, actually, to cut the syrup of cane sugar and use fruit sugars instead. Get some pomegranate juice and make BLOOD DROP CAKES! Use tomato juice and booze and make yourself a bloody mary shooter. Add almond extract if you must have a raindrop, it’s clear and will at least give you something to taste. But unflavored gelatin, oh my god, I love you too much to let you do that to yourself and call it “dessert”.
And people wonder why I love Wonder Woman so much.
Yeah, I can see why they wouldn’t just MAKE THIS MOVIE RIGHT DAMN NOW
Let’s start Monday with Wonder Woman, shall we?
“We have a saying, my people. ‘Don’t kill if you can wound, don’t wound if you can subdue, don’t subdue if you can pacify, and don’t raise your hand at all until you’ve first extended it.’” - Wonder Woman
EXACTLY. I’m as impressed with this “vigilante” nonsense as he is. I really hope they’re not gonna try to generate any audience sympathy for that perspective.
I got an email from a reader earlier. The sender was a lovely young woman who had just re-read my first published fic and wanted to tell me how much she enjoyed it—how it made her feel, how it made her smile, how it made her cry, how it made her excited to get home each night and curl up in bed with it, how it helped ease the pain of a difficult patch in her life, and how much she misses it now that it’s over. It was a beautiful letter, and my reaction to it must have been visible enough to make my saner half take notice from across the room. He shot me a questioning look, and I turned the laptop around and gestured to the screen.
I followed his eyes as they scanned each line, saw his lips tip up in a smile that grew broader as he read, then braced myself for the good natured snark I’ve come to expect when my little literary hobby comes up in conversation.
“Wow.” He said. “That was kind of amazing. How does it feel to be someone’s favorite author?”
“Don’t be a dick,” I said, slapping him on the shoulder.
“I’m serious,” he replied, gesturing to the screen. "That’s what she said—right there: You’re my favorite author.”
“I think she means favorite fic author. Not real author.”
“Is there a difference?” He asked.
“Yes,” I said, rolling my eyes. ”Of course there is.”
“Why?”
“Because, as someone in this room who isn’t ME is fond of pointing out, self published gay mystery romance novels aren’t exactly eligible for the pulitzer.” I said, turning the computer back around.
“So what?” he shrugged, “Something you wrote inspired a stranger to sit down write what it meant to them and send it to you. A lot of total strangers, as a matter of fact. You write, people read it and react. That makes you an author.”
“Huh.” I said, very eloquently, then got up and went into the kitchen to start dinner.
Hours later, sitting down to reply to the letter in question I find myself writing this post instead. Because here’s the thing: That wonderfully crazy man who lives in my house is right. (But please don’t tell him I said that)
From the moment I realized that letters made up words and words made up sentences and sentences made up worlds that were mine to explore any time I wanted to I’ve been a reader. I have fallen in love with perfect phrases and epic stories and countless characters pressed between the pages of the thousands of books I’ve read in my life so far—and sitting down to string together those same 26 letters into tens of thousands of words of stories I felt needed telling? That makes me an author.
I have adored the work of countless authors in numerous genres, and the world of fan fic is no exception. I have admired and cherished and savored the words of talented writers whose work is no less legitimate for the fact that their names include random keyboard characters and their words don’t live on bound paper on a shelf.
It’s not JUST fan fic. It’s literature. It’s published. It’s read. It’s loved.
It matters.
Thanks to all of my favorite authors for every word on every page on every screen that I’ve ever loved.
Reblog for the sweet anon who asked me if I thought fanfic was as important as “real” fiction. Hope this answers your question. :)
Thanks for reading my work, so happy you’re enjoying In The Library!
Read this. Take it to heart. REMEMBER IT.
Comments are the best
They really are. Anything that manages to touch another person, make their life – their day, a particular minute – better is invaluable.
True story: back at Northeastern, I took my required Advanced Writing class for English majors, and my professor was very into discussing new, modern forms of literature. I did a whole presentation on why fanfic is actually literature (and opened it with a YouTube video of a dramatic reading of My Immortal: Chapter 1).
It was actually very well received, and I feel like fanfic is being recognized more and more as actual literature. There was even a healthy dose of scholarship I could find on the issue, and this was easily 5 years ago.
It’s literature, it’s here to stay, and it’s always nice to show authors how much they’re appreciated. I mean, most of them/us are working for free to engage with your favorite media in new and different ways. Is there always going to be strange, crack!fic like My Immortal? Yes (and that’s literature too!). But there’s also some of my most favorite works of fiction up on AO3, some lines that I don’t think even the best traditionally-published authors I can think of could have come up with, and some of the most passion I have ever seen from people engaging with media in new, different, and often subversive ways.
tl;dr fanfic is 100% a valid form of literature, and appreciate all your favorite authors who aren’t traditionally published authors.
Yes yes yes yes yes
Also guys Even if you don’t agree with this, which is your prerogative, please please /please/ don’t try to force that opinion on other people. Honestly, don’t even mention it. Especially around fanfic writers.
When I was much younger and just starting to write seriously, I had a friend who insisted that fanfiction was stupid and not literature. It took me years to start writing the fanfics floating around my head because of the opinions of this one person, even after drifting away from them. Even now I don’t let friends or family read my fanfics because I’m embarrassed and innately feel like my fanfics don’t count as writing.
Please let fanfic writers have their well-deserved excitement and pride in their writing, because one tiny comment can ruin it for years.
I hope the generations after us look at this moment and go “wow, i’m glad i didn’t live back then” because this is a shameful moment in American history
