Anonymous asked: If you are in the mood to write pain (and, really, when aren't you in the mood to write pain): Rachel/Tobias during the early war

*mean cackling* So when I’m in a very particular mood about the little girl I used to be and how much she was screwed over, I tend to take it out on my characters.  Ergo, I am banned from touching my Alleirat story until our houseguest leaves, and will instead be writing Animorphs because how much worse could I make it.  Sorry.  And since this got pretty long and also there’s not exactly loads of Animorphs fic, I crossposted it to AO3.  If you like Animorphs, maybe comment on that shit or something.

here we stand (with our arms folded)

It hadn’t even been twenty-four hours since the disastrous attack on the Yeerk pool, the sun still over the trees at the edge of the forest where it butted up against Cassie’s farm.  The horse she’d morphed, whose quick legs had saved Cassie and one single woman the night before, was loose in the field, and Rachel was cross-legged on a crate in the barn as Cassie murmured to a wounded rabbit.  Rachel felt dazed, with exhaustion and shock, as if every blink and turn of her head demanded a fresh calibration of her brain, a new moment of I’m alive and nothing is okay.  She’d spent an hour in the shower after getting home, with the water as hot as she could stand, but she could still feel the grit of the Yeerk pool floor on her palms and feet, and kept expecting to catch a glimpse of Hork-Bajir blood on her human teeth in the mirror.  

Cassie didn’t seem much better, her hands still where she would usually be smoothly going through her tasks and her voice mindless nonsense, as if she was as numb as Rachel.  The silence wasn’t quite tense, but there was an unmistakable taut feeling that kept even the noisiest patients subdued and quiet.

“Did Jake say why he wanted to talk to us?” Rachel finally asked, and Cassie glanced up, shaking her head.

“No,” she said. 

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cadeteyes asked: If you're taking rogue one prompts, could you do headcannons for the tragic space bbys (those being Cassian and Bodhi. I have a few of my own but I'd love to see what other people think)

I am…sorry…it’s possible I went Full Tragic with these.

Cassian

  • Cassian Andor has a home planet—Fest—but only in the most generously technical sense. (When Jyn asks, he shrugs and says “It’s cold, somewhere out on the Rim.  My sister showed me how to throw snowballs there when I was four.”  That’s about what he knows.)  His parents are merchants—legitimate merchants, thank you very much—and he learns young how to act like he knows where he’s going and what he’s doing, because wandering young children are always kind of a popular target for trouble.
    • Cassian doesn’t remember a single day when someone flipped a switch and he lived in the Empire, it was more of a slow slide until suddenly everything was Stormtroopers and the whispers of Darth Vader and the Imperial Flag high overhead. And one day he looked up and saw the flag, and looked down and saw his parents smuggling information out of merchant centers for those who needed it, and he decided he was going to do something.  That’s the day he remembers.
    • Cassian has never been naïve.  Three weeks later, he learned that spies die, and that, sometimes, saving something is worth paying with your life.  His parents and his sister bought his escape with theirs.  Watching their blood cool as he hid, he decided he was still going to do something, even if he died trying.
  • Cassian speaks…a lot of languages.  The running joke in the Rebel Alliance is that if you need a translator and none of the droids can manage, it’s time to call Cassian.  He just kind of picked them up as he drifted, after his parents died, and hell, he was six then and it’s been twenty years, he’s worth his weight in gold as a linguist.  Of course, he’s only fluent in about eight, but if you need to talk to some random guy from Fuck All Nowhere, Outer Rim, Cassian’s your man.  It doesn’t matter if he’s never heard the language before, he’s going to Make It Happen.  That’s the other thing Cassian’s known for: Making It Happen.  It’s a good trait in a spy.
    • (Cassian never meets Luke Skywalker—he dies just hours too soon.  But Luke would have liked to listen to Cassian curse in a cluttered mix of Bocce and Huttese and Force knows what else.  It’s the sound of home.)
  • Cassian was formally recruited into the Rebellion because he managed to pick a spy’s pocket successfully, and then the spy watched this skinny eleven-year-old lie his ass off to a Stormtrooper and steal a speeder.  The spy (Cassian doesn’t remember his name, the man died on his next mission and Cassian cried for him) basically tucked Cassian under his arm like a football and kidnapped him.  He was welcomed like a prodigal into the Rebel Alliance, his family remembered for their sacrifice and his information collected over his wanderings a desperately needed help.
    • His method of official entry to the Rebellion had a serious impact on Cassian’s recruiting style.
  • Cassian has met Leia—she’s almost seven years younger than him, and she acts like he should know how high to jump before she gives the order.  He thinks she’s Great™.  He once watched her slay a man with nothing but words at forty paces and it was the most amazing thing he’d ever seen.  He thinks Bail Organa is Also Great™ and is absolutely flattered beyond belief when he one time hears Bail refer to him as their best spy.
  • And finally: Cassian has done some bad shit.  He’s killed, he’s lied, and he’s been on both sides of the interrogation table more than once—sometimes nicely, other times…less so.  But the Rebellion is his home, it’s the only home he’s ever had since the warmth of his sister’s hand and his mother’s smile and his father’s voice, and he’s willing to do what he has to in order to protect it.  He regrets very little, and he still holds his hope for victory close to his heart. And it burns him that Jyn Erso is so ready to act righteous when she’s hidden from the war all these years.  It burns worse because he watches her speak and watches her rage and Force she’s like a star given human flesh, and he can’t breathe with how much he wants to see her lit up with belief in something.
    • He dies at peace, breathing easy, because he’s protected his home and he’s seen Jyn on fire with passion and righteous anger and it was all he’s ever dreamed.

Bodhi

  • Bodhi Rook doesn’t remember this—there’s a lot he doesn’t remember, from Before—but he has met Baze and Chirrut before. Actually, he met Guardian Malbus and Guardian Îmwe, when he came up to their knees.  All he remembers is that he loved the Temple of the Whills, loved the smooth warmth of the carved stone walls and the way the altar glowed dimly in the dark and the feeling of breathing in energy when he stood near the crystals.  He doesn’t remember Guardian Malbus’ booming laugh as he gaped up at the arches of the ceiling, nor Guardian Îmwe’s wide grin when he breathlessly said that it was beautiful.  He doesn’t remember the way he touched a kyber crystal—so daring he could barely believe it of himself—and felt it sing under his fingers and saw Guardian Îmwe’s milky eyes turn toward him as if summoned by the thrum in the air.
    • Bodhi also doesn’t remember that he swore up and down for a full two years that he was going to be a Guardian.  
  • Bodhi does remember a specific day when the flag of the Empire rose overhead.  The clones they had come to trust as the strong arm of the Jedi swept through Jedha City like a storm, and Bodhi remembers with horrible clarity the stark white of their uniforms, scrubbed clean of the individualized markers they’d been so proud of.  He remembers most clearly of all the body of one of the Guardians who had been most indulgent of him, a tall, powerful Togruta woman with a lightning-like scar branching down the length of her arm, splayed broken on the ground with her glazed eyes pointed to the flag hung out from the Temple wall.
    • Bodhi remembers the lesson he learned that day: even the best fighter can’t stand against the Empire.
  • Bodhi has two mothers and twin baby brothers and they need to be fed.  The Empire pays.  He’s sixteen when he swallows down his nausea and takes the cargo job.  He’s a good pilot—they don’t care about his age.
    • It doesn’t hurt as much to watch them rip out the kyber crystals if he doesn’t watch.  
  • Bodhi has seen more combat than you might think.  He’s been hit by raiders three times, Rebels twice, and perfected the fine art of ‘running like hell,’ but it doesn’t always work out.  He’s only ever had to shoot someone twice.
    • He doesn’t want to talk about it.
  • Bodhi is a little in love with Galen Erso.  Not so much with the man himself, although certainly there’s an appeal to the nimble fingers and soft voice and steady gaze, but with his courage. Bodhi, who misses the steady pulse of the kyber crystals, listens to Galen speak quietly about resistance and courage and finding a way to do the right thing, and sees the bright flicker of brave-hearted determination beneath the veneer of the Imperial engineer.  He listens, and Galen’s voice washes over him, and Bodhi loves him for the steady gaze in his eyes.  
    • The same brave-bright storm lights in Jyn, as she fights to convince the Alliance of her father’s message, and she looks at him with a steady fire in her eyes, and Bodhi loves her for it.

Anonymous asked: Sooooo, for the sake of pain, can I have a Nat/Clint fic for the OTP song thing for "Castle of Glass" by Linkin Park

*cackling* All right, let’s play.  Trigger warning for…Red Room shit.  There’s more of this story, of course, after the events of the last scene, but I felt like this was a good place to end it.

Bring me home in a blinding dream,
Through the secrets that I have seen
Wash the sorrow from off my skin
And show me how to be whole again

‘Cause I’m only a crack in this castle of glass
Hardly anything there for you to see

She is very small when she learns what they mean, the words inscribed over the curve of her hipbone.  Not the words themselves—they’re not Russian, not even the right alphabet, her parents say they’re French and she wonders what it means.  But they are her soulmate, her parents say.  Someday, somewhere, someone will say them to her, and that will be the person the universe has created just for her.

She smiled and traces her fingers over the words, over and over, and wonders who it will be.

And then her life catches fire and burns to ash, and she is taken away by a tall man with a solemn face, and given a new name.

Natalia grows up, and learns, and fights, and bleeds.  

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twistedangelsays:

Real Talk Guys

I don’t know how many of you guys that (for some reason) follow me (please don’t leave me tho I love you) also follow @words-writ-in-starlight (if you don’t tho you SHOULD because she is my wife and posts writing and like reblogs content a million times better than mine. Like. Really. If you have stayed with me you should be following her.)

Let me tell you tho. She is EVIL. Her writing, especially her original writing, KILLS ME because wow it is both brilliantly written and she knows how to make you fall in love with a character just to torture them (both literally and figuratively). I just got to read everything she’s written for Polaris and GOD KILL ME I AM IN PAIN. I don’t really know what this post is about other than I’m suffering and you should all convince her to post some of Polaris or ANY more of her original writing so I have people to suffer with. Also, seriously, if you are already a fan of hers and want to have someone to suffer with about her writing HIT ME UP. Just send me a message or something jfc.

Also, my dear wife that I know is reading this, WRITE ME MORE YOU BASTARD I CAN’T BELIEVE WHERE YOU LEFT OFF.

Thank you to whoever got to the bottom of this post. This has been a psa: follow @words-writ-in-starlight, go read everything she has ever touched and posted, then message me so I have someone to suffer with.

(Source: lathori)

phantomrose96:

Prompt-based fandom events are when you really learn everyone’s colors like you’ll find the people who take the prompt “death” and come up with some smarmy ship-art of character A and character B walking over dead leaves while wearing scarves and drinking hot cider and then you’ll find the people who take the prompt “sunshine” and write how a bright glint of sunshine reflected off the barrel of a gun is the absolute last thing character A sees before taking a bullet to the chest

you can lead a content creator to water but you sure as fuck can’t make him drink

(via minutia-r)

kashinoha asked: #70. (67%) with Hardison/Parker/Eliot!

From this ancient prompt list, because I am the worst and it took me forever to get around to this.  I just want everyone to be proud of me because I almost went somewhere REALLY terrible with this prompt.  Because the last episode of Leverage fucked me all the way up and I remain vengeful about that.  That near miss will be obvious.

The con had unraveled at light speed.  Things had gone south almost as quickly as the time Leverage Incorporated had stolen the maquettes of the David, leaving Parker scrambling to adapt their plan and salvage as much as possible.  They’d managed to get the files that would prove their target responsible a fistful of deaths revolving around tainted eggs, but now Eliot’s earbud was fried.

Well. He thought it was fried—admittedly he hadn’t devoted a lot of time to checking in more detail.  Between the black eye swelling on his face (bone undamaged, bruising unlikely to occlude vision), the blood seeping into his jeans from a nasty knife cut to his thigh (missed the artery, unlikely to prove lethal, would inhibit full range of motion) and the four cracked-hopefully-not-broken ribs impeding his breathing (another hit would shatter them along the fissures) and, naturally, the fact that he was tied to a chair (efficiently, they had practice), the earbud had taken low priority.  If it was fried, he was going to murder Hardison with his bare hands, assuming he got out of this with both hands intact.  

Also assuming that the others got out of this to be murdered, of course, which was never a certainty when someone had the forethought to take their hitter out of the equation.  Eliot almost would have been reassured if the target’s hired muscle (most of them half-decent, with a small command structure of better trained mercs) was busy torturing him, because if they were occupied with him, the others would have time to get out.  Instead, they had managed to knock him out with a hard blow to the head (mild concussion, vertigo manageable for motion) and left him here alone, tied up and out of play.  But he was trying not to think about that, because if he thought too hard about the kind of disaster that could befall Hardison and Parker when he wasn’t there to take the hit for them, he got a little lightheaded (possibly the concussion, more probably a mild anxiety response).  So the dead earbud had to take a back burner to getting the fuck out of here and finding the other sixty-seven percent of Leverage International.

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Anonymous asked: ♫ Enjolras/Grantaire

words-writ-in-starlight:

RIGHT, so I got Third Eye by Florence + the Machine (also I super love this meme and more people should do it.)  I ain’t even a little sorry.  Canon era, motherfuckers, because I can.

Grantaire was arguing with him again.  Most of Enjolras’ mind was occupied with ripping down the other man’s case, almost enjoying the familiar pattern, but that quiet part at the base of his skull, the part that had been getting louder of late, was distracted.  It was discomfiting and foreign, as if he no longer quite knew himself.  It did little to inhibit his argument—they were second nature by now, he could spare that scrap of attention—but he was bothered by its persistence.  Just when Enjolras believed he had shaken off the strange abstraction, Grantaire would tip his head back and laugh at something Joly had said, his wild curls falling back from the line of his throat, and it would return with a vengeance.

He’s brilliant, the quiet voice noted now.  It was true, something Enjolras had noticed before. For all that he dulled its edge with wine and other, stronger spirits, Grantaire’s mind was as keen as the edge of broken glass, quick and incisive, and he soaked up information as effortlessly as he did liquor.  Grantaire claimed to know nothing—nothing but love and liberty, he had said—but he could hold his ground against Enjolras, and quote Greek and Roman writings without so much as a pause to recall. He spoke rapidly, as if the thoughts piled up behind his tongue and pressed to be first through his lips, and was prone to winding, tangential thinking, but his points were good and clear and glittering.

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Reblog for the daytime crowd.

youfightlikemysister asked: I am so in love with your Mutant!Les Amis, it's incredible. I didn't think I'd like any power Grantaire was giving and then you went and made it the most perfect power! I'm quite emotional right now. If you every chose to write more that would be a very cool thing!

Aw, I’m so glad you liked it, it was a lot of fun! Here, this is kind of ADHD and random but it’s KIND OF plot, right, so yeah.  Also OH MY GOD this got grim, Christ, this is just sads, I don’t…I don’t have a defense for this, except that I was kind of consumed by my feelings about Feuilly in this universe and things got away from me.

Okay so Mutant Registration, right?  And the rise of the Cure.  That’s what we’re dealing with here.  The Cure is in development, there’s discussion of forced administration to mutants who are a hazard to self or others, and the mutant population is terrified, angry, desperate, Les Amis as much as any of them.  They’ve been at least tangentially involved in at least one protest a week for months, and it’s gotten to the point where they’re recognized on the news.

They have moments of uncertainty, sure, like anyone who’s spent years being told how unnatural they are.  Even Enjolras, who is so aflame with his defense of his people that he burns like a white-hot star even in bright sunlight, has his moments where he wonders—just a little—if it would be better after all to be normal.  Those of them with obvious mutations, or mutations with nasty backlash, have worse moments, more moments, and they all objectively know that, but somehow it’s still a surprise when Feuilly, steady and smiling and gentle, wavers.

They’re all a bit drunk—it’s a Friday, they’re exhausted and safely ensconced in the back room of the Musain and Madame Huchloupe can read minds, so if there’s ever been a safe place for a rather motley crew of mutant activists to get drunk, this is probably it.  Musichetta is there, very solemnly drawing daisies up Jehan’s right arm in Sharpie while Grantaire sketches roses up his left and the honeysuckle braided into his hair twines itself into a crown—Jehan almost always has a few cuttings of his plants in his hair, living off his power.  Cosette is watching Eponine set off tiny crackling fireworks that dance over her fingers, delighted, and Marius is staring like Cosette’s glee is the most incredible thing he’s ever seen.  Even Enjolras and Grantaire are getting along (this is before they get together), having an entirely cordial conversation about the details of their last protest.

And Feuilly, who usually sweeps into rooms like a light going on, warm and friendly, slips in silently, staring at the floor, with Bahorel radiating fury on his heels.  

“Feuilly?” Courfeyrac says, turning immediately, his hands already out toward the dark blotch of Feuilly’s emotions.  Bahorel hovers behind Feuilly’s shoulder like he’s planning a murder, downright thunderous, and then Feuilly raises his head and the room goes very quiet indeed.  

He has a black eye starting and an ugly mess on his cheek, like someone ripped at the scales against the grain, pulling them out at the roots. The places where the skin on his arms—littered with bruises—blends into black snakeskin is raw and abraded.  His lip is cut and bleeding, his black-on-steel snake eyes damp, and his shirt is stained red at the nape of his neck, where his scales scraped against something rough, like stone.  He holds himself like his ribs hurt, like he might have broken bones, and stands crookedly, all his weight on one leg.

There’s a long beat, because no matter how many times one of their number appears bruised and hurting, it never becomes normal.  Feuilly and Grantaire always get the worst of it, because no matter how obvious pyrokinetics are no one wants to mess with them, but this is the most damage any of them have walked in with.

“Oh,” Jehan says, soft and grief-stricken, and he shrugs Grantaire and Musichetta away to walk forward.  He reaches out and rests his hand on Feuilly’s arm, seeking permission, and Feuilly blinks at him for a moment before he sighs and leans his head on Jehan’s shoulder, his ruined cheek turned away.  Jehan hugs him, cautious of his injuries, and Enjolras, Courfeyrac and Combeferre close behind him, is the next to reach them.  

“What happened?” Enjolras asks, unusually soft.  

Feuilly closes his eyes and doesn’t answer, and they can see his flinch when a tear streaks down to the mess on his cheek, salt water in the wound.

“They caught him on his way from work,” Bahorel half-snarls, because Bahorel is a buoyant and glad soul right up until his friends—or Feuilly, whose position is somewhat indeterminate even to the other Amis—are threatened.  “Seven guys—big guys, too.”  Enjolras nods, because Feuilly can take care of himself, but one on seven are nasty odds at the best of times.  “I don’t know what they used on his face,” Bahorel continues as Jehan steers Feuilly over to a chair and pushes him down.  “I got there and ran them off.”  He smiles grimly, all teeth, and says, “Remind me to pick up some more krav maga.”

“Feuilly, let me look at your chest,” Joly says, limping over—it’s due to rain tonight, his leg is troubling him, but he’s discarded his cane in his hurry.  Feuilly doesn’t say anything, lets Joly unbutton his shirt and doesn’t react to his hiss at the red and purple mottling that spans one side of his ribs.  “Someone get me some—thanks,” he says, taking the glass of water Bousset holds out and a napkin from the table.  Feuilly closes his eyes, as if he can’t stand to watch the others watching him—Feuilly’s proud, but right now he just looks tired, as if it’s too much to bear.  Joly starts to dab at the blood on Feuilly’s face and the room falls quiet again, except for the shuddering sound of shadows stirring over the floor and the quiet crackle of sparks showering through Eponine’s long hair.

Once Feuilly’s face is clean, the damage looks even worse, the beds of scales raw and seeping blood.  Joly cradles his cheek in one hand and closes his own eyes to focus, and the damage begins to vanish, new scales pushing through the skin and settling flat against each other.  The black eye sinks away, the bruises and scrapes evaporating like a dream.  Once it’s done, Joly brushes a thumb over the repaired scales on Feuilly’s cheek and they slide like water, black and sleek. Joly lets Bousset wrap an arm around his waist and support him as he retreats from Feuilly, and Bousset clasps a hand briefly around Feuilly’s wrist, fingers pressing against the sweep of scales over the pulse point.  There’s a faint crackle, as if of ozone, and Bousset pulls away.  Feuilly opens his eyes briefly and offers a wan smile, then closes them again and raises a hand, pressing the heel of it into the socket of one eye.

Grantaire is the one who sits down next to him and grips his arm firmly, and Feuilly leans to the side, like a strong tree toppling under a gale, to lean against him.  Grantaire’s all-black eyes half-lid, and he rests his hand between Feuilly’s shoulders instead, his shadows still for the moment so as not to disturb his friend.

“I don’t want to do this anymore,” Feuilly whispers into Grantaire’s shoulder, and it’s the first thing he’s said since he arrived.

“I know,” Grantaire says, heavy and tired, and Cosette and Eponine exchange a look, drifting over to the table themselves.  Cosette’s wings are pulled tight around her shoulders, as if she’s retreating into them, and Eponine’s flaming eyes are shaded by her lashes—freaks among freaks, the ones who can’t hide.

“I don’t want to be like this.”

“I know.”

There’s nothing else to say.

For @littlestartopaz (who requested it) and @twistedangelsays (who wanted to read it).  Chat Noir/Ladybug with G from this post, Chat says the line (“Don’t you ever do that again!”)

All right yeah, look, I really like reveal fics and I really like pain, so this is the product of that.  Also, these two kids need to get their shit together and cuddle and care about each other and stuff.  I am a simple woman with simple needs.  AND this is your friendly reminder that I am taking prompts and there’s a masterlist of ships/fandoms on my blog!  Hit me up!

“This guy needs to chill out,” Chat Noir said, shooting a smirk at Ladybug to see her nose crinkle up.  Her look of fond distaste was the highlight of his day, every day, the kind of friendly teasing Adrien had always wished for as a little boy. The only thing better was when she actually shot a joke back at him, leaving a warm weight in his chest and a smile on his face.

“That wasn’t even clever, Chat,” she said, spinning her yoyo and letting it fly at the shell of ice between them and the rest of the world.  He spun his baton overhand and slammed it into the crack she had left, and as he pulled back the yoyo lashed out again.

“So you think my puns are usually clever?” he asked, grinning, and hit the ice again.  “You know, I could have us out of here–”

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