Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

i-aint-even-bovvered:

gothiccharmschool:

febricant:

kylux:

Balem Abrasax → Jupiter Ascending costume lookbook

Okay. Okay you all need to know something. I am going to see the hell out of this movie. I am going to watch it on opening night and cackle with gleeful abandon. Gay Bondage Space Wizard villain? Sign me up. Half-man-half-wolfthing Channing Tatum as the Spaceman Antihero? Put it in my eyeballs. Mila Kunis as some kind of Unknowing Space Princess/Janitor? Express it directly to my brain.

I see you judging me, but I do not care. I don’t care! Bring it to me, trash masters of the world, bring me your clunky dialogue and ludicrous casting choices. Bring my your wooden romances and endless debate about Space Industry nobody gives a shit about. Bring me your eye-searingly awful CGI. 

This movie is going to be a cult classic and I for one am getting in on the ground floor. Look at this Made Up Evil Spaceman Royalty Name. Look at him. He’s barefoot. He’s draped head to toe in sparklegoth space chic. He probably eats minions whole by unhinging his snake jaw. My body is ready.

This description? This description makes me want to see the movie. Nothing else has.

I CREATE LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE!

MY BODY IS SO READY.  GIVE IT TO MEEE.

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

vehiclesshockme:

If you insist on going to go see a badly written fan fic movie that caters to the fantasies of women this Valentine’s Day weekend please see Jupiter Ascending and not Fifty Shades of Grey.

Neither will be good.

But Jupiter Ascending will be the some of the most ridiculous over the top fun you’ve had in a theatre in a while when all of your bad self insert sci-fi fan fics from when you were 14 have an orgy and create a beautiful 3D $100 million child. 

Fifty Shades of Grey will try to convince you that an abusive relationship is both an accurate portrayal of BDSM and what you should crave as it masquerades as romance.

Jupiter Ascending features Eddie Redmayne as a sparkly cape wearing bare chested Dowager Countess Voldemort.

The choice is obvious.

Jupiter Ascending.

You’re welcome.

(via inkandash)