Anonymous asked: Has Batman ever had encounters with Harley and Ivy as Bruce Wayne? Would he ever try using that part of his identity to help them or any other of his rogues, for things like trying to start a new life away from villainy and such?
Someone was in Bruce Wayne’s office, and there was no graceful way to avoid them without making it obvious that he knew they were in there. There was a smell in the air like mulch and roses.
He had no frame of reference for what would constitute a normal amount of things to notice, and so chose to err on the side of oblivious moron.
If there’d been a smell like marzipan dipped in bleach, he might have chosen differently.
“Heya, Mister Wayne,” Harley Quinn greeted, sitting on his desk. She waved as much with her feet as her hands. He closed the door behind him.
Bruce considered his response. Hopefully his momentary indecision with regard to his facial expression could pass for surprise, or confusion, or fear. “Hello, Dr. Quinzel.”
“Don’t worry,” she said. “I’m not with Jay no more.”
“She’s with me,” Poison Ivy said.
“Hello, Dr. Isley.”
“I really prefer Ivy.”
“Dr. Ivy,” he corrected.
“Doncha love the way he says doctor?” Harley asked Ivy.
“Charming,” Ivy said. She did not sound charmed.
“I told her we oughta come talk to ya,” Harley explained, “on account of you’re a real nice guy an’ all.”
“Thank you?”
“I was just going to kill you,” Ivy added.
“Thank you. For not doing that.”
“Isn’t he just like a puppy?” Harley asked, pressing her hands to her cheeks.
“You can’t keep him.”
