i came out of Beyond wanting to draw Ballerina Enterprise dancing the dying swan and i FINALLY got around to it
i hope the next movie is a little gentler with my silver lady ;_____;
Wow, Janey, just wreck me, why don’t you.
(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)
James Tiberius “sunk all his points into improvised weaponry and bluff” Kirk, space bard.
Commander “charisma is a dump stat” Spock, space wizard
Lieutenant “wait, can we use supplemental materials for this?” Sulu, space duelist
Lieutenant Nyota“lockpick and detect trap are literally always useful skills guys come on” Uhura, space theif
Lieutenant Commander Montgomery “definitely going to blow the party up with that flask of Greek fire” Scott, space alchemist.
Ensign Pavel “Does not know how to tank” Chekov, Barbarian
And finally, to round out the party, Leonard “I can’t believe not a single one of you motherfuckers took a single rank in healing, I should pick rogue just to spite you,” McCoy, space cleric.
(via youfightlikemysister)
“ugh people have started shipping kirk and spock”
yeah um the 60s called they have some news for you
(via windbladess)
George Takei was so excited to do this shirtless episode. He spent all his free time doing push-ups for a week before they shot this.
they were going to give him a katana and have him be a samurai, but he didn’t want to be stereotypical, so he told the execs that he could fence and they wrote in references to the three musketeers instead
he could not, in fact, fence
he spent the weekend before shooting learning how
He has described leaving that meeting where he told them he could fence and going directly to a phone book to find an instructor.
(Source: colonel-kira-nerys, via academicfeminist)
The Naked Time
♪ Riley ♪ : and now, crew, one more time!#I love this exchange so much #they both check their anger and frustration and consciously stop taking it out on each other #and they both forgive each other for snapping #and I like to imagine a few days later on the bridge Uhura starts subtly humming that damn song just to mess with her captain #and they have a chuckle over it #this is what I mean when I say Kirk and Uhura have such a sweet relationship #they respect and fret over and believe in each other so much
(Source: lovely-trek, via windbladess)
“where did this weird trope even come from?”
well, statistically speaking, probably star trek
(via windbladess)
Imagine Jaylah at the Starfleet academy after Star Trek Beyond.
-Like the first day she gets there and is settling into her room Scotty is there to help her move in. And he’s just so happy she’s going to the engineering part of the academy but is also scared to death that she’s going to become a red shirt.
-Her roommate isn’t that fond of Jaylah’s taste in music and hates the banging and loudness of it all.
-In her first few classes she doesn’t even pay attention due to knowing all the material.
-the only class she actually listens in is language and communications class.
-Uhara is happy to hear the girl is taking an interest in communications though she knows Jaylah will always stick with engineering.
-she video chats with the enterprise crew quite often and they usually help her with her course work.
-Uhara with communications of course.
-Sulu with the mandatory pilot classes that all cadets have to take.
-Chekov helps her with learning the constellations that she forces herself to learn in case she ever gets lost.
-Kirk is just her chatting buddy and they’ll discuss classical music together along with other things.
-Usually Bones is the one to call her. He does this when Jim has pissed him off or something idiotic has happened and he needs to rant it to someone.
-Spock is the one who listens to her troubles with classes and helps by suggesting things that may help.
-Scotty is the one she always calls when she’s excited about something that happened in class. He feels like a proud father whenever he hears about what she built that day.
-No one at the academy believes Jaylah when she says she knows the famous enterprise crew. Even the teachers scoff at the possibility.
-Everyone jokes about how she’s making up knowing the crew until they show up one day.
-the Enterprise had docked and the crew had practically a month of shore leave so the first thing they did was head to the academy.
- they burst into the room in the middle of one of her history of Starfleet classes. They’re all beaming while the Class and teacher just stare shocked and confused at the sight of the crew.
-Scotty’s the one to yell, “Lassie!” When he sees her.
-Jaylah’s up in a heartbeat and runs over to the crew hugging Scotty first.
- She moves to hug the entire crew after that saying hello to each of them.
- “How you doing Jay?” Kirk asks her.
- “As well as I can James T.” She answers grinning.
-Kirk chuckles and the crew drag the girl out of class.
-No one really sees Jaylah for the rest of the month outside of classes. They’re even shocked when she stops coming to a few of them.
- When she finally does appear again she’s bombarded with people wanting to know how she knows the crew of the enterprise.
-She just grins and answers, “They made my home fly.”
-After that everyone knows not to mess with Jaylah, not only in fear of getting their butts kicked by the woman herself but by the crew that stands behind her as well.
-A few years later at her class’s graduation no one is surprised at all when she’s assigned to the Enterprise or when the entire crew showed up to the ceremony.
(via windbladess)
George Takei was so excited to do this shirtless episode. He spent all his free time doing push-ups for a week before they shot this.
they were going to give him a katana and have him be a samurai, but he didn’t want to be stereotypical, so he told the execs that he could fence and they wrote in references to the three musketeers instead
he could not, in fact, fence
he spent the weekend before shooting learning how
(Source: colonel-kira-nerys, via thepainofthesass)
sroloc--elbisivni asked: It's not 1 AM, but would a person curious about whether or not piracy would *work* for a star trek au be welcome in your askbox?
ALWAYS.
Okay so we’re going to talk AU where the Enterprise crew goes rogue. Now, here’s the thing, the Federation just kind of wants to make friends with everyone. They have a habit of going out, fighting wars, and then making friends with their erstwhile mortal enemies—the Klingons, the Romulans, the Cardassians, even the Borg (although admittedly only Seven of Nine and the Borgettes), and that’s just what I can think of off the top of my head. The Federation isn’t perfect, but fundamentally they just want to hold hands with aliens and poke spatial anomalies with a big stick and build wildly implausible and unsafe technology and hit big red buttons to see what happens. That sort of thing…just doesn’t really lend itself to piratical behavior within the Federation itself. You get smugglers, naturally, and space pirates attacking the Federation, and even your odd freedom fighter/rebel corps (I’m thinking the Maquis from Voyager, although, hell, they end up part of a Starfleet crew too) but even in the AOS (and we’re doing AOS because I just saw Beyond again), with Admiral Marcus kicking around, I can’t really see the Enterprise crew going properly pirate.
(I mean, I guess they kind of do, several times in TOS, but only in the ultra-technical Mark Watney-esque sense of space piracy of “we’re taking the ship that’s not ours without permission.” And they always do it to save everybody and let’s be real, it’s hard to punish the people who saved the Federation, it would be a bit hypocritical to go “thanks for the save, glad not to be dead, time for your court martial”.)
That being said, obviously now the solution is to figure out under what circumstances they WOULD go full pirate. And in the AOS I’m going to say that the way that would happen would be if Admiral Marcus had a little more success with the whole Section 31 thing.
So, let’s suppose that he did, and Marcus might have died with the Vengeance but Section 31 sort of slowly took over Starfleet, as these things tend to do, and the Enterprise is out on their five-year mission so they don’t realize anything’s wrong because they’re pretty far out into uncharted space and even subspace signals get weird after that kind of distance.
And then the Enterprise comes home, cruises into spacedock, and the crew is dropped into a Terran Starfleet that…they don’t recognize anymore. Things are stiff with protocol, there are massively lethal torpedoes being integrated into the new ships, half the science complexes have been annexed by weapons research, McCoy’s highly alarmed by the sort of questions he’s being asked about the new species he has records of, and the Security officers are being issued some very large phaser rifles. Let me tell you a thing: Jim and the bridge crew ain’t pleased with this development.
Between Spock, Jim, and Chekov, they hack into the ‘Fleet database and discover the plans for the next mission of the starship Enterprise. And their response is “Nope.” The Enterprise crew is loyal unto death to their captain—hell, he died for them already, they’re not in a rush to forget that—so when he summons them quietly to an out-of-the-way location and tells them that Starfleet is planning to start a war, they believe him. And when he asks “Please help me stop this” they agree, readily and gladly.
And then they steal a ship. They steal their ship, because when Captain James Tiberius Kirk leads his own crew onto his own ship, no one thinks to stop them, until Scotty’s dismantling the tracker they slipped into Engineering and Sulu’s punching it and the Enterprise is soaring away.
And then…well. I suppose then they have a war to stop and a Federation to evade and a Starfleet to fix. They refuse to take off their uniforms, even after the fourth time they’re accosted by another ‘Fleet ship and barely escape alive—they are Starfleet, the real Starfleet, and they will prove it. They’re wanted criminals, according to the Federation, run rampant under the command of a lunatic captain. Every scrap of incriminating information about Jim Kirk is dragged out of the mothballs and splashed across every news source in the quadrant—did you know he was a repeat offender in Iowa? Did you know he had a record of violence and aggression? Did you know he destroyed property? And once the Enterprise is really getting to be a problem, they crack open the classified files and there’s whole new surge of questions. Did you know he was on Tarsus IV? Did you know he admitted to murdering guards there? Did you know that his psych eval afterward said he’d never really recover? Did you know, did you know, did you know?
The Federation, the point is, is officially on the hunt.
Unofficially, though…well. They’ve escaped an awful lot of brigs and shiplocks—all though underhanded trickery and violence, their ex-guards are always quick to point out. See, they have the footage to prove it, look, the Enterprise crew is crafty and tricky and crazy and dangerous. And there were problems with the lock, with the cuffs, with the shiplock, can’t the Federation keep their own people in good quality tech? Naturally no one would help the Enterprise, they’re wanted criminals, they’re dangerous, they’re pirates.
That brig door has been broken for years.
They’re pirates with a weird habit of helping stranded ships and going on strict rations so they can share their food and figuring out ways to save whole cultures from plagues and negotiating treaties, though. The worlds that are part of the Federation territory learn to fear their own ships, but the Enterprise…she’s their savior. The names of the crew are whispered among the people on the ground, Kirk and Uhura and Spock and McCoy and Chekov and Sulu and on and on and on. She’s always oddly well-stocked for a pirate ship, never really risks starvation. Her dilithium chambers are always full—must be stealing from old wreckage and defeated enemies, of course.
The Federation’s upper echelons hunt the Enterprise down.
The Federation’s people love her. They call her the Silver Lady, or the Lady of Starlight, or Lady Luck.
And everywhere she lands, her crew says “We will fix this. We will stop this. This is not what Starfleet should be, we are what Starfleet should be, and we will make this better.”
The Unofficial Rules of the Starship Enterprise
1. The laws of physics are not challenges.
2. You may not test theories on each other. Not even the senior officers. Especially not the senior officers.
3. Do not feed any tribbles.
4. DO NOT FEED ANY TRIBBLES.
5. Tribbles are no longer allowed on the ship.
5a. Edit: Dr. McCoy and First Officer Spock may use a tribble when absolutely necessary under dire circumstances only.
5b. Update: No crew member may ever have a tribble on the ship under any circumstances ever.
6. The ship is not sentient. The captain may not marry the ship, even if it’s only a joke. Neither may Mr. Scott.
7. We take it back. The ship is sentient. Respect her at all times.
8. Any non-standard maintenance (READ: modifications) to the ship MUST be approved by Starfleet and properly documented.
9. Even if the Captain would pretend not to notice them. Or wholeheartedly supports them. Or is the one doing them.
9a. STOP MODIFYING THE DAMN SHIP, JIM.
10. Captain, Doctor McCoy is wise in his advice. I suggest you follow it before there are any…unfavorable consequences from the admirals in Starfleet Command.
10a. Spock, did you just threaten me?
10b. Negative, Captain. I merely wish to remind you of the upcoming ship inspections, as the last time Admiral Benett had to deal with the reports he was very adamant that our crew is no longer trusted to do our own quarterly inspections. Apparently too many of crew relationships are founded on “mutual propensities for non-strictly-regulation shenanigans.”
11. The illegal still in Engineering is—however appreciated—still illegal. No stills in Engineering, or anywhere else on the ship.
12. Alcohol from said still may not be sold for profit, especially outside of this crew. News of its existence cannot, under any circumstances, reach the admirals or their underlings. Or the engineering staff of other ships. Or the captains of other ships!
12a. NO ONE MAY SPEAK OF THE STILL DOWN IN ENGINEERING, EVEN TO OTHERS ON THIS SHIP.
13. The first rule of moonshine stills: You do not speak about the moonshine stills. Just shut up and drink the alcohol.
13a. With pleasure, sir!
14. Lieutenant Uhura would like to inform whoever modified and reprogrammed the universal translators that she looks forward to personally ripping out their vocal cords and using them to repair the damage she’s been forced to spend the last 34 hours fixing.
15. The captain would like to remind Lieutenant Uhura that insults said in other languages are still insults, and still unacceptable.
16. Lieutenant Uhura would like to remind the Captain that insults are acceptable when sufficiently deserved by certain farm hicks and that if they are not understood by the enemy party then there’s no harm done.
17. The Captain would like to remind Lieutenant Uhura that he is, contrary to what she may believe, a genius who does know more languages than he usually lets on, and no sentient being would appreciate being called a [expletive removed, by authority of Lieutenant Commander Spock] under any circumstances.
18. Lieutenant Commander Uhura would like to politely remind the Captain—
19. Lieutenant Commander Spock, with the authority of First Officer, hereby orders this conversation to be dropped immediately. It is unbecoming of senior officers, and frankly, quite childish. If the two parties wish to continue, they may do so on their own time in private quarters.
20. On a related note to yesterday’s spat, no one is allowed to place bets pitting senior officers against each other. Especially not the other senior officers.
21. Karaoke night is hereby banned forever from the Enterprise.
22. The Captain is not allowed to declare laser tag wars in the Jeffries tubes. Even if everyone involved enjoyed it.
23. Pig Latin is not an official language of the Federation, nor an acceptable method of communication when working on shift.
26. The shipwide broadcast system is not for playing favorite music while at warp in to “set the mood.”
27. Regulations are not “more like guidelines, anyway.”
28. “What the admiralty doesn’t know…” is not a phrase that should precede any statement on this ship.
28a. Somehow, every time it’s said, the admiralty inevitably does find out. Senior Command is investigating the possibility of a jinx on the phrase.
29. The Captain is not allowed to name any newly-discovered dinosaurs by himself. We cannot have seven separate species of Kirkosaurus.
30. The marriages that various crewmembers have been forced into via alien rituals on away missions are not valid. If you wish to be officially bound, you can do so the normal, legal way.
32. Starfleet has officially-established drill proceedures. They do not include laser tag, paintball, Mafia, or capture the flag.
33. The Captain is no longer allowed to eat, drink, touch flirt with, or look at any unknown substances on away missions.
34. It is a punishable offense to evade routine medical evaluations.
34a. This includes you, Jim.
34b. Any and all crewmembers found to be assisting the Captain in hiding from Doctor McCoy are subject to official reprimand and the immediate restriction of all deserts from their meal card.
35. No member of the crew may walk within five feet of Lieutenant Sulu’s plants. Some of them can move, and some of them are extremely…territorial.
36. Starfleet is not responsible for the consequences if you decide to play tag in the Jeffries Tubes, nor will you receive any sympathy for injuries sustained while doing so.
36a. Except maybe for Chekov.
37. There is no such thing as being “allergic to paperwork,” especially since paperwork is entirely digital and no longer on actual paper.
38. The captain may not declare Casual Fridays.
39. The Captain may not declare a “Space Pirate Day.”
40. Officer Spock may not mislead crew members into believing that he is still ignorant of common human idioms and expressions of speech.
41. However illogical the captain is being, when logic fails to persuade him, it is still not acceptable to pick him up and physically move him.
42. FOR THE LAST TIME, JEFFRIES TUBES ARE NOT FOR PLAYING IN.
43. Shipwide games of Murder are not an accepted method of “team bonding.” No matter how much you try to argue that a common enemy brings people together, it won’t change the fact that organized serial murders—even fake ones—are not acceptable behavior on a starship.
(via windbladess)
