flvffs asked: this will not hold a candle to your fic recs, but im plunging right in regardless. alright, so *cracks knuckles* where do i begin? you are the bastard child of royal blood, the son of a prince who has no legitimate heirs and stands next in line to inherit the throne. you are made the royal assassin, which is generally not a child-friendly occupation and the kind of thing you introduce yourself with, hence many lies about what you do up in the keep. (1/?)

As you grow, you are still known to much of the keep as the Bastard. You never see your father, but come to be regarded fondly enough by the common people of the keep. Still, you have no close friends, and the combination of loneliness and pressure from the people around you molds you into an extremely loyal bastard with little to no concept of self-worth.  (2/?)

Robin Hobb places you squarely in the heart of the story with compelling narrative, excellent character development, and enough pain to make a brick wall weep tears of slow-dripping cement. (3/?)

This doggedly loyal character is thrown into danger again and again, giving everything he has to the service of the crown despite such trivial factors such as love (ah, who needs love? Not this sorely bereft-of-affection bastard, that’s for sure), reputation (what’s in a name, anyway?), and, well, pain (so much pain). (4/? and deeply apologetic for clogging up your askbox)

The Farseer trilogy, high fantasy, with dragons, magic, growing up, little details, and everything in between. You want a story with seamstresses and cooks doing everyday things? This has it, losing none of its compelling plot in the process. Starring: love, animals (animals!), friendship, FitzChivalry Farseer, whose name literally means ‘son of Chivalry’ and never gets round to changing it (you got the url guess right) (5/? is this 5?)

Also starring: fabulous worldbuilding, combat, mental issues (I just really want to hug him he has been through so much), strong women (so many strong women), great description, diversity (royal family canonically described as having dark skin, I don’t know who keeps fuckin up the book covers), childhood, love, so much love, the idea of duty over choice, tenacity, humour, magic used in cool and realistic ways, what happens to kids when you cut them off emotionally from everything they love (6??)

The series is my favourite right now, perhaps because it doesn’t shy away from the grittier details, and maybe because it’s so fascinating watching Fitz grow up. Thanks for sitting through that rambling, badly-planned book rec, and I really do hope you read it. Assassins! Magic! Old anger! Animals! Pride! Love! (wipes tears away from eye) I just cannot recommend it enough. This is one of the best fantasy series I have ever had the privilege to read.

Dude, I am fucking sold.  I am gonna acquire these books.

Anonymous asked: Important questions in no particular order: what is the Foxhole Court, do I need to give a shit about sports in order to enjoy it, are there LGBT characters/relationships, and in the event that I cave, should I just buy all the books in one fell swoop?

patroclvss:

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Originally posted by nosilanollid

I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED.

let me answer all of that under a read more bc im gonna gush a lot about this series.

Keep reading

*takes off anon hat*

OKAY because I keep seeing it pop up on my dash and it looks like EXACTLY my cup of tea (I’m that person who considers things like Die Hard and, like, fuck, I don’t know, the Mummy and superhero movies and Deadpool to be wholesome cleansing entertainment, intrigue and murder and violence are my shit) and I was just, like, SO CONCERNED that I needed to give a shit about sports.  I just.  Do not.  BUT Check Please! is a gift unto this earth and I kinda give half a fuck about hockey after reading it, so SOLD, I’m gonna go get the first book.