The *real* “I just got my first apartment” post
That other post seems to be for people with money. But you don’t have money. So what do you actually need for your first apartment?
- A bed. Not an air mattress. Not a blanket fort. Not a mattress pad with a fitted sheet over it. An actual bed. You’re going to try to avoid it, especially if you live in a city where bed bugs mean not buying a mattress from Craigslist. Beds cost money (unless you can take the one from your childhood bedroom, in which case, do that and use the couch when you visit home). But fuck it, you need one. If you’re desperate, you might go with a futon, but the futon you can afford will break with the quickness. You might also go with a mattress on the floor, which seems like a good idea until it suddenly seems really dirty, which is because mattresses need air flow to stay dry and sanitary. If you don’t have a box spring and don’t want to drop the $40 on a cheap bed frame, you can use these guys to build a platform, and if you find plastic drawers the same height, you can even build some storage in there.
- A dresser. You will try to find a way around this. It will end up with your floor covered in clothes within a week. Just find a dresser on Craigslist or go to your local auction (a great place to find cheap furniture in general). And don’t buy a cheap dresser to build yourself from K-Mart or Wal-Mart, because it will break and it will likely be more expensive than a Craigslist/auction dresser anyway.
- A TV. It doesn’t have to be new or huge or advanced. But you want a TV. Don’t try to skip the TV for something more trivial. You’ll regret that quick.
- A couch. Specifically, an old, comfortable couch. One you don’t mind falling asleep on or letting guests sleep on. Don’t spend a lot of money. Couches will find you. Don’t overthink it. It’s your first apartment. Nobody expects you to have a perfectly curated adult home. Just get a comfy fucking couch. And if you get two, you can use cinder blocks to make stadium seating in your living room!
- A table. You will ruin it, so get a shitty one. Learn your lessons on something cheap and disposable.
- A full(ish) kitchen set. If these things don’t appear from your parents or your roommates’ parents, you need to buy a pot and pan set, silverware, a silverware organizer, at least one sharp knife (and let’s be honest, you’re gonna want a knife block and they’re only like $11), at least one mixing bowl, a colander, a cutting board, a couple of storage containers, plates, bowls, glasses, and mugs. You’ll figure out what else you need as you need it, based on your own kitchen habits. A lot of this can be picked up at the dollar store if you have one near you. And if you don’t bake often, disposable baking pans are your friend.
- Hand soap, dish soap, wash-your-ass soap. Nobody likes poor hygiene. You also need toothpaste and floss. And deodorant.
- Flashlight and candles (nothing fancy). In case something goes wrong.
- A plunger. In case something goes really wrong.
- A toilet brush. Your momma probably never let the toilet form rings (or let you let that happen), so it might come as a shock how quickly and easily those shits form.
- A shower curtain and liner. Or even just the liner. Don’t get the floor wet.
- Sponges. You have no idea how many sponges you’ll need.
The rest, you’ll stack over time, but these are the things you need.
Thrift shops and charity shops may have silverware and pots and pans for cheap, as well as furniture, sheets, etc.
When buying used furniture: look in the cracks and under the edges for pin-sized brown/black spots. Bedbugs are tiny and they live in upholstery and any wood with enough crevices to allow it. You almost certainly won’t be able to see the bugs themselves, but they leave little spotted trails along seams and in places that don’t see a lot of light. You cannot get them out of furniture; it’s not worth the extreme measures it takes to do it.
Also, don’t forget laundry detergent and a rubbish bin and bin liners. Rubbish, laundry, and dirty dishes are 90% of the mess in a messy home and 99% of bad smells. Keep up with them and your home will always be at least clean-ish.
Oh, and bleach is a good cheap substitute if you can’t afford specific cleaners for your toilet, tub, vinyl counters/floor, etc., but test it on a small spot to make sure what you’re cleaning can handle it, dilute the fuck out of it, and never use it on wood or mixed with dish liquid. Use white vinegar or diluted Pine-sol for mirrors, glass, and sealed wood floors.
For serious, thrift stores and yard sales are the best places to go for lamps and kitchen stuff. My first apartment was full of so-ugly-they’re-awesome goodwill lamps, my sister’s first-apartment silverware, a box of old mugs a lady from church gave my mom and a toaster oven as old as time, no one’s quite sure where it came from.
Pool around from friends, your friends’ parents, jump on yard sales. Like I’ve learned that it’s STILL more worth it to buy wine glasses at yard sales, those fuckers get broken, don’t ever spend more than 50 cents on ‘em.
Also, NETWORK. Tell people you’re moving into your own place and if they know somebody looking to get rid of furniture/kitchen inventory/white goods, to let you know. Sometimes people have relatives who are moving smaller/to retirement communities/passed away - and their house needs to be cleared out. There’s often a lot of practical stuff (fridge, microwave, kitchen ware, furniture) that’s too old to sell and sometimes people are very happy if that stuff can help you out, especially if you can come take a load of it off their hands.
sounds crude but it can be a mutually beneficial thing
(Source: steviemcfly)
