Honestly if the fellowship had cellphones the #1 change would be Aragorn constantly complaining on the phone with arwen in the two towers like “they’re flirting again. Yes again. Literally I don’t even want to tell u what I walked in on yesterday but it involved gimli cleaning his axe in an inappropriate manner. And the worst bit is they still pretend like they hate each other my god. I’m gonna lose it I swear” while arwen is like “mhmm that’s nice dear”
#I KNOW I’VE ALREADY LOST MY SHIT IN TAGS ABOUT THIS SCENE BUT#LAST TIME IT WAS ONLY THE LEGOLAS AND GIMLI BITS AND TBH I LIKE #FORGOT???? #ABOUT HOW IT’S ARAGORN THAT HAS TO KNOCK LEGOLAS’S BOW DOWN #AND BE LIKE ‘CHILL BRO’ #and it just makes me wonder #how many times poor aragorn has had to get in the middle of #a) legolas losing his shit because someone threatened gimli #b) gimli losing his shit because someone threatened legolas and #c) LEGOLAS AND GIMLI THREATENING EACH OTHER #like seriously how many fires do you think aragorn has stared into mournfully #while legolas and gimli sniped at each other in that we’re-arguing-totally-arguing-not-flirting-at-all #way they have #how many times has aragorn stepped into the middle of a barfight-to-be #to be like ’legolas that guy wasn’t calling gimli pint-sized he was ORDERING A PINT please say some soothing elvish words to your tits man’ #or #’gimli it was a blonde joke they weren’t talking about legolas specifically PUT THE AXE DOWN OH MY GOD’ #like seriously #after all that time traveling with them kinging must be such a relief #all these years aragorn dodged his destiny #but now that it’s here he’s like #oh. diplomacy. i can do this. #lucky thing i was trained by THE WORST PEOPLE I KNOW in diffusing NEEDLESSLY TENSE SITUATIONS
please say some soothing elvish words to yr tits
oh my god
This is the best argument for Aragorn’s kingly training I’ve ever heard
Aragorn rapidly develops a reputation for being the most level-headed diplomat around. He can take insults straight to his face, have a sword pointed at him, have his country threatened with war, you name it, he doesn’t even blink. He does all the treating with the Southrons personally because he doesn’t bat an eye at anything they throw at him. (Of course Arwen also earns a reputation as a sparklingly brilliant diplomatic tactician, but everyone is less surprised when the three-thousand-odd-year-old ex-elf is generally unimpressed by everything, because she’s had a long time to get there. Aragorn, on the other hand…well, he might have been raised by elves and he might be Numenorean, but he was a scruffy wandering Ranger for decades and everyone expected that to be what they got as a king.)
Every once in a while a courtier brings this up, flatters the king to within an inch of his life over it, and finishes with “Sire, where did you learn such diplomatic skill?”
And Aragorn stares off into the middle distance and says “You don’t want to know” while Arwen goes off in a very unqueenly fit of hysterical laughter.
(Source: filisnow, via skymurdock)
