Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

likeniobe:

shredsandpatches:

likeniobe:

“a little touch of harry in the night” is, objectively, the worst line that shakespeare ever wrote

Not in a world where “O would mine eyeballs were to bullets turned / That I in rage might shoot them at your faces” exists.

that line is killer and I stand by it

(via bronzedragon)

cthonius:

Do you vagueblog about me, sir?

I do vagueblog, sir.

Do you vagueblog about me, sir?

(aside) Will I receive a callout if I say aye
(aside) Yes
No, sir, I do not vagueblog at you sir; but I vagueblog, sir.

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

Anonymous asked: *curtsies* Mighty duke, I've been taught at school that the balcony scene in Romeo and Juliet is actually a sonnet, but you recently assured that this is incorrect. Could you please explain why? I'm starting to doubt everything my teacher says

dukeofbookingham:

*Curtsies* First things first: There is no such thing as ‘the balcony scene.’ Calling it ‘the balcony scene’ is a misnomer because there’s no actual balcony involved. ‘Balcony’ wasn’t even really used as a word until about the 1610s; Romeo and Juliet was written in the 1590s. Romeo says “What light through yonder window breaks?” She’s at a window. Not on a fuckin’ balcony. That’s people conflating what we have of the text and what we *think* we know of early modern theatre architecture and creating a balcony where no balcony exists in the world of the play. So that’s the first problem. Second problem: Romeo and Juliet do speak a sonnet together but it’s in the scene at the Capulets’ ball when they first meet, not in the incorrectly-termed ‘balcony’ scene. (It’s Act I, Scene 5 and it starts with If I profane with my unworthiest hand if you’re looking for it.) Yes, there is a sonnet. No, there is no balcony. And there definitely isn’t a sonnet on a balcony at any point.

niuniujiaojiao:

raptorific:

Shakespeare would seriously laugh so hard if he found out how seriously people take his works. Like, he would probably cry from laughing so hard if you told him that his plays were considered high-brow literature. “It’s all dick jokes and sword fights,” he’d say, “do they seriously tell my dick jokes to schoolchildren? And the kids aren’t allowed to laugh? Do the teachers know they’re telling dick jokes? Oh my god that’s fucking hilarious. Wait until I tell Anne.”

“You’re telling me my fourth most popular quote on Goodreads is that dick joke from Twelfth Night? And people actually think that when I said ‘greatness,’ I meant like, high standing and shit, and not dicks? Oh my god. Oh my god. This is the greatest day of my life.”

(via lupinatic)

the-real-will-shakespeare:

ladylannistark:

*whispers* if Shakespeare could pass the bechdel test despite writing in an inherently patriarchal and routinely misogynistic society then you, modern day writers, have literally no excuse

*whispers* you really, really don’t

(Source: bloomsburys, via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

thepurposeofplaying:

theprettygoodgatsby:

my favorite part of hamlet is at the beginning when they see the ghost of hamlet sr for the first time

and the guards are like “Horatio, you go talk to it! You went to college!”

and Horatio is like “Yeah! I did go to college! I will go talk to the ghost!”

like. where did horatio go to college. did he go to ghost college

YES, ACTUALLY YES HE FUCKING DID BC

(a) EVERY COLLEGE THEN WAS GHOST COLLEGE bc ghosts were widely believed to be Real™ n thus scholars learnt abt them. moreover, as everybody knows, ghosts only communicate in Latin; Latin is the scholastic language. Horatio is a scholar, thus both knows abt ghosts and knows Latin, so it is very reasonable to assume he will b able to ask this one what up (as obviously sth must b up 4 it 2b wandering around, why else wld it b here, gawd, this is like. the most basic of basic-level shit)

(B) WITTENBERG WHERE HORATIO STUDIES WAS LIKE. T H E MOST SPOOPY OF GHOST COLLEGES bc they were alllllll about theology n the supernatural n shit so SUPPOSING HORATIO WILL KNO HIS SHIT ABT GHOSTS IS IN FACT A THOROUGHLY SENSIBLE ASSUMPTION

this has been said before but i am fucking adding it again bc it HACKS ME TF OFF when ppl reblog the post w/o commentary as if OP jsut fucking checkmated Shakespeare when in fact all they managed to do was fail at the most basic historical contextualisation of this scene n make a fcuking fool of emselves lmao

You’re my favorite.  All others need not apply.

(Source: corvidcall, via yea-lets-do-this-shit)

firebreathingeli:

actualscience:

firebreathingeli:

actualscience:

firebreathingeli:

actualscience:

firebreathingeli:

actualscience:

firebreathingeli:

actualscience:

firebreathingeli:

actualscience:

firebreathingeli:

Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

i do bite my thumb, sir

Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

is the law on our side if i say ay?

No

no, sir, i do not bite my thumb at you sir; but I bite my thumb, sir

Do you quarrel, sir?

quarrel, sir? no sir

if you do, sir, i am for you: i serve as good a man as you

No better

well, sir

DOST THOU WANT TO FUCKING GO, SIR?

DOST THOU THINK THOU CAN FUCKING TAKE ME, BRO?

DOST THOU EVEN HOIST? OUT TO THE COURT YARD, WITH HASTE.  

(via cthulhu-with-a-fez)

nixhouseofcards:

eeddis:

rosequuuartz:

I want someone to do a production of a midsummers night’s dream but instead of it taking place in a forest it takes place in ikea

#*squints* you make a compelling argument actually#shakespeare#I want this#I want one where the audience moves with the actors#all around ikea#& the play is stretched out#super long#around & around ikea#until you have lost sense of#direction & time & even language#then back out to the exit#for the very end#puck makes the speech#‘think but this and all is mended’#& then finally you are free#free to step out into the light again#into the mortal realms#or you go for meatballs idk (x)

This is what Shakespeare was meant for.

(Source: genos-tals, via yea-lets-do-this-shit)