Look, this is my litmus test: I pretend I am the original Earl of Sandwich. I have asked for non-bread foods to be brought to me inside bread, that I might more easily consume them one-handed while gambling.
This does not enable my wretched regency habits. This is not what I asked for. I do not deign to grace it with the name of my house.
This is the most important addition to the sandwich discourse I have ever read.
THIS IS THE BEST LITMUS TEST FOR SANDWICH-OR-NOT I HAVE SEEN.
A sandwich isn’t just a base concept but a function. Goddamn that’s a brilliant test.
By this test, is pizza a sandwich?
If the answer is no because it’s not encased in bread, then what about a calzone?
By this logic, any calzone of a small enough size to be held in one hand with a sturdy enough crust not to drip would in fact qualify as a sandwich, which makes me mildly uncomfortable.
