Rise Up, Oh Heart, For There is Another Battle to Win

hasufin:

seananmcguire:

knitmeapony:

seananmcguire:

priscellie:

Man. I feel so thirsty lately.  I can’t drink enough water. I feel like the senator guy in that X-Men movie after getting exposed to Magneto’s mutant machine, and he keeps drinking drinking drinking water uncontrollably until he dives into the ocean and becomes a terrifying jellyfish creature and explodes.  Freaking Magneto. I was already sympathetic to the mutant cause. Why you gotta hate?

You’re not a mutant, honey, you’re a mermaid.  It’s all right.  Once your scales start coming in, you won’t be as thirsty.

You know, being a diagnostician in a world with more public magical creatures must be a trip and a half.  

• “Extreme thirst has a lot of causes.  Let’s check your blood sugar, and let’s take a skin sample to see if you’re developing scales.”
  
• “Joint pain is pretty common when someone’s pushing themself that way with training, and I’d definitely recommend some rest, but it sounds like it’s been coming on with the moon so we might want to do a blood test to check for lycanthropy.”
  
• “I’m going to give you this journal.  Keep track of how often you’re near bodies of water and copses of trees – not single trees, there needs to be a cluster.”
• “Bear with me, I know you’re lactose intolerant, but buy a pint of milk and keep it in your kitchen.  If it spoils faster than expected, we’ll have a better idea of what’s going on here.”
  

“Have you considered that you may not, in fact, actually be a mammal?”

“Okay, I’m going to have to refer you to a specialist. It looks like your tertiary dentition is coming in.”

“I think we need to check for allergic reactions to silver, iron, a few types of wood, garlic, and holy water. That’ll help us rule out some possible causes for this rash. In the mean time I think you should avoid Italian food and holy ground.”

“Have you noticed clusters of birds following you? Were they corvids? Hm, interesting. You ought to come in to the office so we can discuss this further.”

“That itching sensation might be a rash, but I think we ought to give you an MRI and see if you’re about to grow horns.”

(via dubiousculturalartifact)

ok, but have you considered…

sam-sour-wolf:

• The guy living below me has a really loud alarm clock that always wakes me up at the ass crack of dawn AU
• I went to investigate a scream and found my neighbour standing on a chair to avoid a rat/cockroach/snake AU
• My neighbour has a really squeaky bed and my bedroom is right below theirs AU
• Someone keeps stealing my doormat AU
• My pet tarantula escaped and I forgot to warn the guy below me who is scared of spiders AU
• I need you to pet sit my pet this weekend and I forgot to mention it’s a giant snake, the mice are in the freezer, thanks bye! AU
• The apartment above me has left their tape on or something and water is LEAKING THROUGH MY CEILING WTF! AU
• My neighbour’s sister got the wrong house number and barged into my apartment AU
• The guy next door/my roommate always steals my coffee, so I started to make extra AU

APARTMENT AUs! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ

(via dyinghistoric)

MY ROOMMATE @twistedangelsays AND I ARE DOING THE MATH AND APPARENTLY I HAVE WRITTEN APPROXIMATELY 370K WORDS OF ORIGINAL FICTION THIS YEAR.

THREE

HUNDRED

AND

SEVENTY

THOUSAND

What the fuck am I doing with my life?

Someone Needs to Take Away J.K. Rowling’s Twitter Account

lupinatic:

alliecat-person:

madeofpatterns:

slashmarks:

madeofpatterns:

doomhamster:

captain-ameribunny:

doomhamster:

feathersmoons:

lolmythesis:

English, Notre Dame

The Author-Who-Lived: J.K. Rowling’s Refusal to Accept the Death of the Author in the Internet Age

Man I fucking hate this attitude. I especially hate that Rowling gets this shit thrown at her. God FORBID she continue to engage with her own fucking work.

I don’t get why this is even a thing? I mean, why WOULDN’T one be interested in the author’s intentions and the ideas they had that didn’t make it into the finished work and so forth, regardless of whether one actually thinks they managed to express them well?

People seem to think they’re entitled to take over someone else’s work.  News flash: JK Rowling created the Harry Potter series, not you.  If you don’t want to hear what she has to say about it, stop looking at her twitter account then. 

Yes. This. Now I’m all in favor of AUs and headcanons and whatnot, and in Rowling’s particular case I can certainly see reason to criticize the way she’s revealed some things, but talking about it like she should just “accept” that once she’s published something nothing she has to say about it matters? Ridiculous.

Everyone *else* gets to have headcanons, why shouldn’t she?

Like - it annoys me when people jump on Harry Potter meta or interpretations because of something JKR said on twitter or in one interview, because there is no way to keep track of everything she’s said and she changes her mind sometimes, and ultimately my meta is about the books, not what the author was thinking. I understand being annoyed if a lot of people have jumped on you for it, too. 

But that isn’t her fault, and she has the right to talk about her own books.

Agreed.

All of this.

Rowling is under no obligation to accept Death of the Author. Nor are we as readers necessarily–if you want to, that’s great, but it isn’t the only way to be a reader.

On that note, it isn’t just a matter of ‘if everyone else can have headcanons, why can’t the author?’ it’s a matter of the author’s headcanons being canon, even if that josses someone else’s headcanon. She gets to decide this stuff, because she made the world we’re playing in. She was the one who sat down and did the hard work. Just because she was gracious enough to share it with us, some people seem to feel entitled to grab it and shout “No, you’re wrong! This is OURS now! MINE! All mine!”. Believe in your headcanons as much as you want, but don’t expect anyone who isn’t you to accord any importance to them, and don’t be surprised when people get amused at the entitlement inherent in the notion that your opinion is somehow every bit as legitimate as the opinion of the woman who did all the hard work.

I was very attached to the idea of a Ravenclaw Teddy Lupin. Guess what? He’s a Hufflepuff according to the woman who created him and his parents, and I’ve no right to insist otherwise.

Zombie apocalypses are curiously lacking a large array of common equipment that could neatly control the situation.

rensbogusadventure:

govthookercoulson:

“But we can’t build walls to contain them!”

Moves by truck, train or boat. Ridiculously common. And see those holes on the bottom? Mobile by forklift. Also, HEAVY, even when empty they’re in the tons. If you had some warning you could string these things end to end for miles and human bodies can’t move them. Plus they’re nice and wide so you can comfortably walk on top of them for patrols.

“But we don’t have easy ways to kill them!”

Put the shotgun down you fucking idiot.

No tires to pop. Heavy and slow but inevitable. Climbing required to enter and thus, relatively zombie proof, especially if you spend like an hour to protect the glass.

A lot of large farming equipment can destroy cars.

Want to guess what it’d do to a decaying human body? It’s not pretty.

Now I know what you’re thinking. Merely flattening them with common construction equipment or farming gear isn’t enough.

How about a tree trimmer that can mulch a tree top to bottom in nothing flat?

OM NOM NOM NOM.

“But we need ways to move a lot of people that zombies can’t stop!”

BEEP BEEP MOTHERFUCKER. Deer don’t have a chance and neither does a zombie.

“But that’s not good enough!”

NOW it’s time to call our friend the military because this ride stops for no one.

Do I need to keep going or is it clear the movies are bullshit yet? Seriously a dozen prepared people with heavy equipment licenses could clear an entire street of zombies AND powerwash it after.

Country folk can survive

(via johanirae)

Sum up the plot of your novel/main story in one sentence

emospritelet:

swan-queen-hollencsteins:

gxldenglider:

daughterofscotland:

kickingshoes:

solastolemyvhenan:

the-champion-of-the-citadel:

scribblepups:

aggressive-pepsi:

killerville:

handwritingofgod:

inquisition-madness:

the-champion-of-the-citadel:

I’m bored and this could be fun

I’ll start 

“The importance of proper closure.” 

“Six people find out why making deals with gods is a bad fucking idea”

“Child attempts to save various gods and humanity from ancient evil; ancient evil is only somewhat impressed”

“Bond girl becomes too gay to function.”

A schizophrenic prophet and her LGBT friends sacrifice Straight Larry to zombies

a gay bunny flies around after the only city in the world blows up

You have my attention

Angry smol elf teams up with grumpy tall elf to fight aforementioned grumpy tall elf and bring him to justice for crimes against humanity.

Ohh, so many!

“A mage and a cat-boy walk a lost star home.”

“Man with amnesia looks to regain memories with the help of a sarcastic scarf.”

“A group of disappointments try to become less so.”

“Two plants try to save the world.”

“Why am I doing this, I don’t even want to be a princess, I hate you all!”

“A group of gay adults with powers decide to destroy oppressive government.”

“A halfling teenager, her werewolf girlfriend, and their pack protects their town.”

“The fates reborn decide it’s time to fuck up Olympus.”

“Everyone is unreliable,” or “A diverse group of young adults and their parents have their lives fucked up by a serial killer and each other.”

“Dealing with grief by fucking your teacher is so not a good idea”

In which a collection of assorted and diverse magical beings come to terms with the fact that politics will fuck you up; also everyone is LGBT because curiosity>medieval hangups after a few hundred years.

Or if that’s not your taste: In which angels are a thing that happened around 1947 and just kind of never left; also everyone is LGBT because fuck you I do what I want.

OR: In which cities are sentient and like to fuck with their citizens; also everyone is LGBT because LITERALLY WHY NOT.

(via clockwork-mockingbird)